Asking for help can make us feel vulnerable and handicapped. However this is not the time to let your ego stand in the way. This is the time to get resourceful. Don’t fall into the trap of not wanting to burden people. You are not an imposition, so ask. Who can lighten your load? The people who love you will be happy to donate their time. More than likely they feel totally helpless and want desperately to contribute. Making your day a little easier is the best gift a person can give and, as we all know, giving is way cooler than receiving. Don’t be shy. Organize your needs by making a list and delegating. That’s right, coordinate who can do what and when. No task is too big or too small.

If you’re unable to call on family or friends, talk with your oncology social worker, network with the nurses, research local organizations with volunteers. Can your church or community of faith assist you? How about that nice neighbor who takes in your FedEx packages when it rains? Get crafty! There are always people who are willing to help, some of whom we barely know or have yet to meet. The trick is to be open to cultivating unexpected relationships and to accept when an offer comes our way.

There are dozens of online organizations that can steer you in the right direction as well. Ah, thank Jesus, Buddha, Elvis, Etc. for Google. For example, the American Cancer Society offers buckets of support including patient navigators. Caring bridge, Care Pages, and Mylifeline.org allow patients to build free personalized Web sites. Your fans (that’s right, fans) can view your treatment schedule and life load in order to better help you. They can also post caring messages to lift your spirits when you’re down in the dumps.

MySpace and Facebook are also great ways to find cyber pals in a similar situation. I’ve been surprised by the deeply meaningful relationships I’ve made by way of the Internet. In some cases, my cyber posse provides more encouragement than the people I have known for decades. Folks who reach out don’t think of it as a chore. If the roles were reversed, wouldn’t you do the same? So there you go. Enlist your family and friends for support.