ACT TWO
Lights rise on DAVID and MADISON sprawled across a table, sweaty and dishevelled, breathing heavily, partially dressed. DAVID gets off of her. They straighten their clothing, close zippers, locate panties, dispose of the condom, etc. Neither speaks. Finally.
DAVID
So.
MADISON
Yeah.
Pause.
DAVID
How was I?
MADISON
Not bad. For a fag.
DAVID
You seem.
MADISON
It’s alright.
DAVID
Really?
MADISON
Really.
Pause.
DAVID
I should.
MADISON
Yes.
DAVID
Good.
MADISON
Okay.
DAVID
Everything’s?
MADISON
Fine fine.
KANE enters.
KANE
Madison.
MADISON
Daddy?
DAVID
Kane.
KANE
Do you have any idea what time it is?
MADISON
No.
DAVID
We got.
MADISON
Talking.
KANE
Your mother’s very.
MADISON
I can’t believe you’d come here like this.
KANE
There was no answer on your cell.
MADISON
I turn it off at work.
KANE
We should.
MADISON
I’ve got Mom’s car.
KANE
Go ahead.
MADISON exits.
You okay?
DAVID
Yeah fine why?
KANE
I dunno. You look kinda—funny.
DAVID
I’m just tired.
KANE
That night at dinner. I hope you didn’t take what Carolyn said the wrong way. She didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or anything like that.
DAVID
I know.
KANE
Everyone puts their foot in their mouth once in a while right?
DAVID
Right. Kane—how is your relationship with your kids?
KANE
Good. Why?
DAVID
They just seem to.
KANE
What?
DAVID
They like to talk.
KANE
To you?
DAVID
Yeah.
KANE
I want to talk to them. I try. But they just don’t seem interested. Royce gets further away all the time.
DAVID
It’s a challenge.
KANE
Has he told you something he hasn’t told me that might make everything alright?
DAVID
Nope.
KANE
Damn.
Pause.
David please fire Madison. Please.
DAVID
I can’t.
KANE
Something—this is really messing up my family. Ever since she started working here.
DAVID
I can’t fire someone because their parents are uncomfortable. There are laws against that kind of thing now.
KANE
Can’t you find some excuse?
DAVID
Unfortunately she’s an excellent waiter.
KANE
Shit.
DAVID
We’re stuck for the time being.
KANE
She shouldn’t be working here.
DAVID
I’ve come to agree.
KANE
And there’s nothing you can do?
DAVID
I wish there were.
KANE
You had no business coming back here.
DAVID
I didn’t have a lot of other options.
KANE
I know how interesting things get when you show up. I don’t want things to get interesting.
DAVID
I didn’t want to see you any more than you wanted to see me.
KANE
Okay. Good. Great.
DAVID
And I promise if I can find a way to let Madison go I’ll do it.
KANE
I’d appreciate it.
DAVID
And our paths will never intersect again.
KANE
Great.
KANE exits. DAVID sits at the table and pours himself a large glass of wine. Lights rise on CAROLYN cleaning the sink in the kitchen. MADISON enters.
CAROLYN
There are only two reasons anyone stays out until this time of the morning and they are sex and drugs.
MADISON
I have a right to my own life.
CAROLYN
You don’t have the right to keep us up all night.
MADISON
Okay. True. It’s time I.
CAROLYN
Move out?
MADISON
I’m making enough money to get my own place.
CAROLYN
If you get your own place you’ll never go back to school.
MADISON
People do it all the time.
CAROLYN
It’s very hard.
MADISON
Mom you’ve been hinting for me to move out of here for a year. Why are you changing that now?
CAROLYN
I’m not.
MADISON
Are you in menopause or something?
CAROLYN
THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH ME!
Long pause.
MADISON
Sit down.
CAROLYN
I’m.
MADISON
Sit.
CAROLYN sits.
CAROLYN
Sorry I didn’t sorry.
MADISON
You were totally unhinged for a second there.
CAROLYN
I’m just overtired. Really.
MADISON
What’s going on?
CAROLYN
Don’t listen to me. Move out. Get your own place. Have a life. It’s important.
MADISON
I’ll make some tea.
CAROLYN
Don’t bother sweetie. I’m okay.
MADISON
What’s with you?
CAROLYN
I don’t know. I can’t sleep—can’t shake this feeling there’s something I’m supposed to be doing—something that I keep missing.
MADISON
What is it?
CAROLYN
I was raised to get married as soon as I finished school. It’s what my mother did. It’s what her mother did. I never even questioned it.
MADISON
Are you now?
CAROLYN
I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do next.
MADISON
Everything you put off when you got married.
CAROLYN
But I didn’t put anything off. Marriage was all I wanted. I assumed everything would be like my mother and father.
MADISON
Was their marriage that great?
CAROLYN
Probably not but the fact that she died so young added a certain mythical quality to it. I mean no one got to find out how she would’ve reacted when her kids grew up and she had nothing to focus on.
MADISON
Have you talked to Dad about this?
CAROLYN
He sees us going to Florida a lot and playing golf.
MADISON
Golf?
CAROLYN
Apparently after a certain age everyone’s supposed to like it. It’s like exercise without any effort.
MADISON
That’s horrifying.
CAROLYN
I know. Madison I don’t want to be one of those crazy middle-aged women with a mannish haircut and a sensible car. I don’t.
KANE enters.
KANE
Hi.
CAROLYN
What took you?
KANE
I wanted to have a word with David.
KANE gets a beer from the fridge.
CAROLYN
About what?
MADISON
Me.
KANE
I want you to leave the restaurant.
MADISON
Forget it.
ROYCE enters.
KANE
There are so many other places you could work.
MADISON
This isn’t about me.
KANE
We need you to do this.
MADISON
It’s about him.
CAROLYN
It’s not.
MADISON
Why do you keep lying? You lie about when you left him—you lie about being the other woman—he lies and pretends it doesn’t matter.
KANE
Everyone remembers things differently.
MADISON
Like the last time you saw him in Montreal?
CAROLYN
Montreal?
MADISON
You were there on a buying trip or something.
CAROLYN
That trip you took when I was pregnant with her?
MADISON
You ran into him.
CAROLYN
You never told me this.
KANE
It was just a coincidence.
MADISON
He never told you?
KANE
I didn’t want.
CAROLYN
To make me mad?
KANE
Why are we discussing this anyway?
MADISON
Because you’re all fucking liars.
ROYCE
I bet she fucked him.
CAROLYN
Royce.
ROYCE
She fucks everyone.
KANE
Don’t talk about your sister like that.
ROYCE
She gets you guys crazy to cover up whatever she’s got going on. Haven’t you figured it out yet?
MADISON
Someone’s jealous.
ROYCE
Did you fuck him?
KANE
Your sister would never do anything like that.
ROYCE
Right.
MADISON
Freak.
KANE
Would you?
MADISON
What?
KANE
Sleep with David.
MADISON
Of course not. Jeez Dad.
MADISON exits.
KANE
What is your problem?
ROYCE
I got no problems.
KANE
You had no reason to attack Madison like that.
ROYCE
I didn’t attack her.
KANE
And quit being such a fucking smartass.
ROYCE
Make me.
KANE
Stop it!
CAROLYN
Kane.
ROYCE
Nice. Gonna hit me?
Pause.
KANE
Go to bed.
ROYCE exits.
CAROLYN
You slept with him.
KANE
No.
CAROLYN
That’s why you never told me.
KANE
Nothing happened.
CAROLYN
Really?
KANE
Really.
CAROLYN
I’m going to sleep in the den tonight.
KANE
Why?
CAROLYN
I just—feel like sleeping alone.
KANE
What the fuck is going on here?
Lights rise on the restaurant. DAVID’s doing bar inventory. MADISON is setting her cash envelope, etc. on the bar.
MADISON
I’m outa here.
DAVID
No dinner?
MADISON
Some of the waiters are going to.
DAVID
Should we talk about the other night?
MADISON
Why are you like in love with me now or something?
DAVID
Of course not but you’ve been so.
MADISON
You said my father’s name in my ear when you came.
DAVID
What?
MADISON
Father’s name. My ear. You came.
Pause.
DAVID
Maybe I was having a stroke.
MADISON
It wasn’t a fucking stroke.
DAVID
Is that why are you’re so angry at me?
MADISON
No I love it when the person I’m screwing thinks I’m someone else. Like my dad.
DAVID
I’m sorry. I guess you—remind me of him.
MADISON
Almost as good as the real thing?
DAVID
Don’t go there.
MADISON
Why not?
DAVID
Because what happened with us has nothing to do with Kane.
MADISON
Royce knows we did it.
DAVID
What?
MADISON
He can tell. I don’t know how.
DAVID
Did you admit to anything?
MADISON
Of course not.
DAVID
No one can find out.
MADISON
Why didn’t you stop me?
DAVID
You were rubbing your cooch all over me.
MADISON
Dad actually asked me if I slept with you. I couldn’t tell him. He would have been so hurt.
DAVID
Yes.
MADISON
And Mom.
DAVID
Oh yeah.
MADISON
I’m going to have to lie about it for the rest of my life or break their hearts.
DAVID
That’s true love.
MADISON
Fuck you.
MADISON exits. Lights rise on CAROLYN scrubbing the kitchen floor. ROYCE enters. He has a black eye.
ROYCE
Don’t we have a machine that does that?
CAROLYN
The floor’s filthy. Jesus Royce. What happened to your eye?
ROYCE
Nothing.
CAROLYN
Were you in a fight?
CAROLYN gets a washcloth and runs it under cold water.
ROYCE
I’m okay.
CAROLYN
Who did this?
ROYCE
No one.
CAROLYN
Hold this over it. Tell me what happened.
ROYCE
You guys are always telling me to stand up for myself.
CAROLYN
If you’re being bullied we need to report it.
ROYCE
Some guy called me a fag and I hit him okay. He hit me back. Some other guys jumped in. Nothing major.
CAROLYN
Do you want to change schools again?
ROYCE
No.
Pause.
CAROLYN
I have some good painkillers in my bathroom.
ROYCE
Mom?
CAROLYN
Yeah?
ROYCE
Why did you marry Dad if you knew he was gay?
CAROLYN
He isn’t gay.
ROYCE
What is he then?
CAROLYN
Your dad.
ROYCE
You still love him though right? Nothing’s changed.
Pause.
CAROLYN
I’ll get those painkillers.
CAROLYN exits. Lights rise on the outside of the house. MADISON is smoking a joint. KANE enters. She moves to put it out.
MADISON
Shit Dad quit sneaking around.
KANE
Don’t.
MADISON
Really?
KANE
I need a toke.
MADISON
Everyone else asleep?
KANE
I think so.
MADISON
You see Royce’s eye?
KANE
I don’t know whether to be worried or proud.
MADISON
Two hoots then you pass.
KANE
Sorry.
MADISON
Why did you leave David?
KANE
It was too hard.
MADISON
Being gay?
KANE
My family disowned me. My straight friends acted like I’d betrayed them. No one called. It was okay for a while. Good even. But—a party every night with the world’s most interesting man can get very tiring.
MADISON
You must miss him sometimes.
KANE
He made me feel special.
MADISON
Yeah.
KANE
It’s easy to get seduced.
MADISON
Yeah.
KANE
To do things you might not normally do.
MADISON
Yeah.
KANE
He was the best friend I’d ever had. If I hadn’t met him. Who knows what I’d be now? Not a decorator. Probably not a father.
MADISON
Really?
KANE
The time I spent with David made me realize how important kids were to me.
MADISON
So we’re here because of him?
KANE
That’s not what I’m saying.
Pause.
MADISON
Do you still love him?
Long pause.
You’re supposed to say no now.
KANE
It’s a—different kind of love. I don’t know if it ever goes away. For sure you never forget it.
MADISON
Real?
KANE
Who knows?
MADISON
Why Mom?
KANE
She was so down to earth and—uncomplicated.
MADISON
Shut up.
KANE
Really. Sweet and innocent and so funny. Everything we said made us laugh.
MADISON
Really?
KANE
Kids only want to see their parents one way. There’s a lot more to us you know.
MADISON
We prefer to think about ourselves.
ROYCE enters.
ROYCE
Is that a joint?
MADISON
Yeah.
ROYCE
Gimme. Are you smoking Dad?
KANE
I had a hit or two. How’s your eye?
ROYCE
Fine.
KANE
I want the names of the guys who did this.
ROYCE
Let it go.
KANE
Royce.
ROYCE
Interfere and it’ll just get worse.
MADISON
Smoke.
KANE
I can’t remember the last time I got high out here. I think Royce was a toddler.
MADISON
With Mom?
They all laugh too loud.
KANE
Sssh.
ROYCE
Don’t wanna wake her up.
MADISON
Did she ever?
KANE
Are you kidding? I used to sneak out here once in a blue moon when you were kids but—let’s just say going back into the house high wasn’t that much fun.
They all laugh again.
Stop.
ROYCE
She said she was gonna take a pill.
MADISON
Hope it was a chill pill.
ROYCE
Double dose.
MADISON
And a shot of heroin.
They laugh.
ROYCE
Don’t. It hurts.
CAROLYN enters.
CAROLYN
Tell me you’re not smoking marijuana with our children.
KANE
They’re not really children.
MADISON
It’s practically legal.
CAROLYN
Whatever happened to setting an example?
KANE
This is no different than having a drink with them. Anyway it’s Madison’s dope.
CAROLYN
Kane.
MADISON
Have a hoot Ma.
CAROLYN
Oh stop.
MADISON
It might help you get over yourself.
ROYCE
And you’ll sleep like a baby.
CAROLYN
Not a chance.
KANE
We’re all high anyway.
CAROLYN
I couldn’t.
MADISON holds the joint out to her.
MADISON
Betting you could.
CAROLYN
I have no idea what it’s like.
ROYCE
It’s nice.
CAROLYN takes the joint from MADISON and smokes it clumsily, with plenty of coughing.
MADISON
Take little puffs.
CAROLYN
So what happens?
ROYCE
You get high.
CAROLYN
How will I know?
MADISON
Things will be—slightly different.
ROYCE
And you’ll want cookies.
CAROLYN takes another hoot and passes the joint on.
CAROLYN
I won’t think I’m Superman and try to fly off a building or anything will I?
MADISON
That Superman pot’s too expensive.
ROYCE
This stuff just makes you forget the baby in the microwave.
CAROLYN laughs.
KANE
I think that story’s true.
ROYCE
Yeah. Like the one about the guy with the hook.
CAROLYN
Or the lady who adopted a chihuahua that was really a rat.
MADISON
Or the hotel robber with the toothbrush in his ass on the camera.
They are all laughing.
ROYCE
Or the one where the girl gets caught with the dog and the peanut butter.
CAROLYN
Or the one about the girl who meets her perfect prince and marries him and has two perfect children and they achieve if not perfection at least a normal life.
Their laughter grows.
That’s hysterical. The nuclear family. One day it just blows up. Ka-boom! There’s a giant explosion and bingo—no more family. Everyone’s become body parts in a mushroom cloud. The only thing that holds them together anymore is the fallout.
All but CAROLYN gradually stop laughing.
KANE
Carolyn?
ROYCE
Stop.
CAROLYN stops laughing. Pause.
CAROLYN
What’s wrong?
MADISON
I’m going to bed.
CAROLYN
Aren’t we having fun?
ROYCE
Total buzzkill Mom.
ROYCE and MADISON exit.
CAROLYN
What did I do?
KANE
Have you got something on your mind?
CAROLYN
No wait yes. If anything happened in Montreal everything we’ve had since has been a lie.
KANE
That’s ridiculous.
CAROLYN
The idea of you being with him while I was pregnant. It just.
KANE
You’ve got to let this go.
CAROLYN
Did you marry me because you didn’t want to be gay?
KANE
I married you because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you.
Pause.
Let’s go to bed.
CAROLYN
I’m gonna stay out here and stare at the stars and think about my life.
KANE
Sweetie.
CAROLYN
Don’t wait up.
KANE
But.
CAROLYN
I’ll probably sleep in the den again.
KANE
Right.
KANE exits.
CAROLYN
The rest of my life.
Lights rise on DAVID at the restaurant on his cellphone.
DAVID
I saw the bombing on the news. Just wanted to make sure you’re okay. You’re probably at work or something and I’m being silly. Call me when you get in. Really.
DAVID hangs up. MADISON enters.
MADISON
Get hold of him?
DAVID
Eleven people were killed in a city of eight million. I doubt Jefferson was one of them.
MADISON
But still. New York.
DAVID
I know.
As she speaks MADISON takes off her apron and turns in her bills and billfold.
MADISON
My section’s clear.
DAVID
Still mad at me?
MADISON
Just fucked up.
DAVID
Me too.
MADISON
They’re falling apart.
DAVID
Mom and Dad?
MADISON
They just seem so.
DAVID
Human?
MADISON
How do two people stay together that long?
DAVID
Insecurity codependency and fear are often the most important ingredients in a long-term relationship.
MADISON
You’re too cynical. Good luck getting hold of your friend.
DAVID
Madison I’m sorry—about what happened. I should’ve stopped it. I know better. It’s just—been so long and you’re so—great.
MADISON
Like you said—I’m a grown-up now.
MADISON exits. DAVID takes her cash envelope and begins to exit. CAROLYN enters.
CAROLYN
David.
DAVID
Madison just left.
CAROLYN
Good.
DAVID
You’re not here to pick her up?
CAROLYN
What happened in Montreal?
DAVID
Montreal?
CAROLYN
Kane never mentioned running into you.
DAVID
Nothing important happened.
CAROLYN
I don’t believe you.
DAVID
I don’t care.
CAROLYN
You gave Madison a job so you can stay connected to Kane.
DAVID
I did it to piss you off Carolyn. Because you don’t know anything about what Kane and I had and you have no right to qualify it.
CAROLYN
He didn’t have an identity with you.
DAVID
And he does with you?
CAROLYN
Marriage takes work.
DAVID
So does denial.
CAROLYN
I know you fucked my husband in Montreal.
DAVID
You didn’t think twice about fucking him when he was with me.
CAROLYN
I didn’t know.
DAVID
You knew.
CAROLYN
Not for the first while. He never mentioned you and neither did anyone else. By the time he told me everything it was too late. I loved him. Trust me—I’ve felt guilty about it ever since.
DAVID
Good.
CAROLYN
So I’m sorry. If I took him away from you and broke your heart or ruined your life or whatever I’m sorry.
DAVID
You didn’t take him away from me. It was already over. I knew how uncomfortable Kane was in our relationship. Never—completely there. I tried telling myself we could make it work but it took so much effort. Eventually I wanted out. I wanted to go away. I wanted to be gay. Really gay not pretend straight. I was always secretly grateful that you were there to make it easier for him.
CAROLYN
Oh please.
DAVID
Believe what you want.
Pause.
CAROLYN
When you were with him. Did he ever go away sometimes? In his head. Like he was dreaming about being somewhere else—with someone else?
DAVID
He does that with you too?
CAROLYN
Yes. I always assumed he was thinking about you.
DAVID
I assumed he was thinking about women.
CAROLYN
You didn’t fuck him in Montreal?
DAVID
No.
CAROLYN
Truly?
DAVID
Whatever happened all those years ago—it doesn’t matter now. I have no designs on your husband so why don’t you quit pissing around and deal with whatever the real problem is.
CAROLYN
Excuse me?
DAVID
You started this whole thing.
CAROLYN
I did not. Madison.
DAVID
It was you who invited me to dinner Carolyn. It was you who made those ignorant gay comments that were bound to piss me off. It’s you who keeps digging up the past. You.
CAROLYN
People were talking.
DAVID
If you’d just left well enough alone it would have died down when nothing happened.
CAROLYN
What are you suggesting?
DAVID
That you’re using me to create drama to cover up some other inadequacy in your marriage.
CAROLYN
Oh for God’s sake.
DAVID’s cellphone rings.
DAVID
Maybe you’re trying to use me as an excuse for something you’re afraid to do yourself.
The cellphone rings again.
CAROLYN
Like what?
The cellphone rings again.
DAVID
I’m sorry your hour is up. Please pay the receptionist on your way out.
CAROLYN
Goodbye.
DAVID
Bye.
CAROLYN exits. DAVID answers his phone.
Hi. Of course you’re all right. Still I worry. Is it chaos? No doubt. Has anyone claimed responsibility? Terrorists are the only ones who do anymore.
Lights rise on the kitchen. KANE, ROYCE and MADISON are at the table drinking coffee and looking very tired.
MADISON
It’s two nineteen.
KANE
I’m starting to get really worried.
ROYCE
Where would she go?
KANE
Maybe we should call the cops.
MADISON
She hasn’t been gone long enough to call the cops.
ROYCE
Maybe she’s skipped town.
MADISON
She’s been strange lately.
ROYCE
Lately?
KANE
Your mother deals with a lot of different pressures. You have to give her a break once in a while.
MADISON
You’re right.
CAROLYN enters.
Where the fuck have you been?
CAROLYN
Out. Driving. Thinking about a new car. I went by the old neighbourhood. Did you know the Safeway’s gone?
KANE
You couldn’t call?
CAROLYN
No.
KANE
Was your cell dead?
CAROLYN
No.
KANE
What’s wrong?
CAROLYN
I needed some. Time. Alone.
ROYCE
Alone?
CAROLYN
To think.
Pause.
KANE
Did you go anywhere else?
CAROLYN
Yes.
KANE
Where?
Pause.
To his restaurant?
CAROLYN
Yes.
MADISON
You saw David?
CAROLYN
Yes.
MADISON
Why?
CAROLYN
To talk.
MADISON
About what?
Pause.
KANE
He told you didn’t he?
Pause.
Did he tell you?
Pause.
He fucking told you. That prick.
MADISON
What did he tell you?
Pause.
KANE
Everything. He told you everything didn’t he?
Pause.
Okay we had sex. At his hotel. We did.
MADISON
I knew it.
ROYCE
Duh.
Pause.
KANE
But the other thing. It was—it wasn’t real. I was just—nervous. Scared. I thought I could go back.
MADISON
Back?
KANE
There’s no way I would’ve gone through with it. I was relieved when he said no.
ROYCE
You wanted him to take you back?
KANE
I was getting married. Going to be a father. Carolyn I was so fucking scared. I never would have went back to him for real. Never.
Long pause.
CAROLYN
He told me nothing happened. He looked me right in the eye and I bought it.
Longer pause.
KANE
Fuck.
CAROLYN
I think we should—re-evaluate our living situation.
MADISON
What does that mean?
CAROLYN
I’d like to live elsewhere for a while.
ROYCE
You can’t leave. You’re the mom.
CAROLYN
The mom can leave. If the kids are grown up.
ROYCE
I’m not fucking grown up.
ROYCE exits.
MADISON
Wow.
KANE
It’s the past.
CAROLYN
I should’ve just trusted my feelings.
KANE
It doesn’t matter anymore.
CAROLYN
You’re right. Good night.
KANE
Where are you sleeping?
CAROLYN
Guess.
CAROLYN exits.
KANE
I just—I can’t explain it.
Pause.
MADISON
I understand.
MADISON exits. Lights rise on DAVID opening a bag of clean linens and sorting them into piles. He hums to himself as he works. ROYCE enters holding a rifle aimed directly at DAVID’s head.
DAVID
You don’t want to do this.
ROYCE
Wanna bet.
DAVID
It’ll make everything worse.
ROYCE
Won’t matter if I’m dead.
DAVID
It’ll matter to your parents and sister. A lot.
ROYCE
I’m gonna kill you and then I’m going to go to the school to kill a few people there.
DAVID
It’s three a.m.
ROYCE
I mean in the morning. Right after classes start. Then we’ll see who’s fucking laughing.
DAVID
You have a single-shot twenty-two dude. Someone’ll bring you down before you reload.
ROYCE
I’ll have all night to practise on your dead body.
DAVID
Someone’s gonna hear the shot and call the cops.
ROYCE
I can deal with it.
DAVID
Think about your future Royce.
ROYCE
I don’t have a fucking future.
DAVID
Yes you do and it’ll be better.
ROYCE
Like standing up for myself was supposed to be better?
DAVID
Sure.
ROYCE pulls his shirt up with one hand, revealing dark, painful bruises.
ROYCE
This is what standing up for myself got me.
DAVID
Jesus.
ROYCE
There were six of them. They wouldn’t stop kicking me when I was down. This teacher finally broke it up but I could tell from the way he looked at me he didn’t want to. Like I deserved it for being ugly or something.
DAVID
Put the gun down so we can talk properly.
ROYCE
No.
DAVID
Royce.
ROYCE
I’ll shoot you. I mean it.
Pause.
DAVID
I can give you a job.
ROYCE
Too late.
DAVID
Do you want me to fuck you?
ROYCE
Sex is gross.
DAVID
Everyone has sexual feelings.
ROYCE
I don’t. I’ve been looking at porn since I was eight years old and it’s the most repulsive thing I’ve ever seen.
DAVID
Then why are you looking at it?
ROYCE
Hoping something’ll kick in. Everyone’s fucking hooked on it. Guys at school have hardcore porn on their iPods—their cellphones. I know girls in the tenth grade who run fuck sites out of their bedrooms. Sigfreid’s got this sick shit you wouldn’t believe. I had to threaten to tell his parents about it to get the gun.
DAVID
Real sex isn’t like porn.
ROYCE
I know. That weird fucking sound my dad makes. And her. You’d never hear that in a movie.
DAVID
Sex makes people do stupid things.
ROYCE
Y’think?
DAVID
Look at your parents. At me. But you don’t have this stupid weakness. You won’t make those same mistakes. You’re actually lucky.
ROYCE
Don’t try getting all confidential with me like you understand Mr. Perfect Teeth Mr. Wonderful Hair.
DAVID
It’s a weave.
ROYCE
What?
DAVID
Everything above my ears is a careful fake attached to my own thinning hair by invisible microfibres.
ROYCE
Get out.
DAVID
Check for yourself.
ROYCE
You’ll just try to grab the gun.
DAVID
No look. I’ll put my hands behind my back. Just feel.
ROYCE touches the top of DAVID’s head.
See.
ROYCE
Weird. Like Astroturf.
DAVID
My smile?
ROYCE
Yeah.
DAVID
Forty thousand dollars.
ROYCE
Shut up.
DAVID
Not a single filling. Who do you know that doesn’t have a single filling? And this waistline.
ROYCE
Yeah?
DAVID
Three inches removed with liposuction. Five grand.
ROYCE
No way.
DAVID
If you look just at the bottom of my eyebrows you can see very faint scars from the eye lift. Seven large. I also spend four days a week at the gym working out for at least two hours. I eat plain chicken breast raw vegetables and rice cakes for most of the week and I just fucking hate it.
ROYCE
Then why do you do it?
DAVID
Because I don’t want to be discarded. I don’t want to be not sexy. Not viable. Not yet. See. It makes us all do crazy things and you’re blessed if you seriously aren’t interested.
ROYCE
Quit talking.
DAVID
Am I making too much sense?
ROYCE
You’re pissing me off.
DAVID
Royce if you were going to shoot me you would have done it by now.
Pause.
Put the gun down. We can talk.
Pause.
ROYCE
Are you going to call the cops?
DAVID
Not if you give me the rifle.
ROYCE
You can’t tell my parents.
DAVID
We’ll work something out.
ROYCE
Work something out?
DAVID
Give me the gun.
ROYCE hands DAVID the rifle.
ROYCE
Mom’s leaving.
DAVID
Why?
ROYCE
Because of Montreal. I don’t.
DAVID suddenly hits ROYCE with the butt of the gun, very hard on the bruised area. ROYCE screams in pain.
Ow! Fuck! What did you do that for?
DAVID
That’s the first bullet hitting a Mormon girl you don’t even know.
ROYCE
What?! Shit.
DAVID hits ROYCE again in the bruised area. ROYCE screams.
DAVID
That’s the second bullet hitting a Chinese kid from your English class.
ROYCE
Okay! I get it!
DAVID
This isn’t a fucking game. People get hurt. Really hurt. And it’s never the bullies who get it.
DAVID hits ROYCE.
ROYCE
Don’t hurt me anymore!
DAVID
Get up.
ROYCE
Don’t hurt me. Please don’t hurt me anymore. Please don’t. Please.
DAVID sets the rifle on the table and kneels down to help ROYCE up. ROYCE throws his arms around DAVID and sobs. DAVID holds ROYCE and soothes him. Lights rise on CAROLYN passing through the kitchen with extra linen. KANE is opening a beer.
KANE
Marriages go through phases.
CAROLYN
This isn’t a phase.
KANE
It is. It’s part of marriage. Right now we don’t like each other very much.
CAROLYN
You don’t like me?
KANE
Of course I do. I love you. But when you’re acting like this. Look we knew when we decided to commit that there were going to be bad times. But we swore we weren’t going to be like other parents and throw in the towel or establish a bloodless partnership for the sake of appearances. Sure there have been occasional times when I’ve hated you or was repulsed by the thought of touching you—and I know you’ve felt the same way about me. But we’re a team Carolyn. We built this house as a team we run our business as a team we raised our kids as a team.
CAROLYN
I know.
KANE
That’s a pretty big accomplishment to toss away.
CAROLYN
I’m not tossing it away. I’m just—thinking about moving on to some other accomplishment.
KANE
Please don’t say that.
CAROLYN
What if David had said yes? Taken you back.
KANE
He didn’t.
CAROLYN
You’d be living with him and I’d be raising Madison on my own.
KANE moves to CAROLYN and puts his arms around her.
KANE
I get drunk on the way you smell. My dick gets chubby at the sound of your voice. I can’t imagine sleeping without your body next to mine. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you.
CAROLYN has gotten turned on. She tries to get away from him.
CAROLYN
Kane please.
KANE
What?
CAROLYN
Don’t you see.
KANE
You can’t walk away from the business.
CAROLYN
The way this all happened. Madison moving out. Royce finishing high school. David coming back. The timing is right.
KANE
The timing couldn’t be worse.
CAROLYN breaks away from KANE.
CAROLYN
I meant it’s right for me.
KANE
Carolyn don’t leave I can’t I don’t I have a belly. I’m old and I have a belly.
CAROLYN
Kane.
CAROLYN moves to KANE and kisses him softly.
KANE
Don’t stop loving me.
CAROLYN
I never will.
KANE
Please.
CAROLYN
But I’ve never had another lover. Or been through a breakup or lived on my own.
They’re kissing one another softly. Both are crying.
KANE
It’s not as good as you think.
CAROLYN
Woke up alone. Called a girlfriend up for coffee.
KANE
It’s not worth losing your family over.
Their hands begin to move over each other’s bodies sensually.
CAROLYN
I’m just renegotiating the terms of engagement.
KANE
I can’t wake up without you.
CAROLYN
We shouldn’t.
KANE
It’s always so good.
CAROLYN
Yeah but.
They have started to fuck.
KANE
Please don’t leave me.
CAROLYN
I have to.
KANE
I love you so much.
CAROLYN
I love you.
They fuck. Lights rise on the empty kitchen. The door opens very carefully. DAVID and ROYCE enter. DAVID is carrying the rifle and supporting ROYCE with the other arm.
ROYCE
Ssh.
DAVID deposits ROYCE in a chair.
DAVID
Here’s the deal. I take the rifle back to Sigfreid’s and no one knows what happened. But if you renege on what we talked about I wake your parents up right now and tell them everything.
ROYCE
Don’t make me.
DAVID
No negotiation.
ROYCE
They’ll hate me.
DAVID
Do it or I will.
Pause.
Royce.
ROYCE
Okay shut up.
DAVID
Remember you keep my secrets and I keep yours.
ROYCE
Mom! Dad! I need to talk to you right now!
DAVID opens the door.
DAVID
Again.
ROYCE
I need to talk to you!
KANE
(off) Hello?
CAROLYN
(off) Royce?
KANE and CAROLYN are heard approaching offstage. DAVID winks at ROYCE.
DAVID
Tell them.
ROYCE
Alright.
DAVID exits, closing the door quietly behind him. CAROLYN enters pulling her robe on.
CAROLYN
Royce?
KANE enters doing up his pants and pulling his undershirt on.
KANE
Son?
Pause.
ROYCE
I need help.
CAROLYN
What?
ROYCE
Please.
KANE
What can we do?
ROYCE
Please help me. Please someone help me. I’m really really sad all the time and I need someone to help me. Please. Help me.
Lights rise on DAVID at the restaurant. He’s checking the glassware for spots. MADISON enters.
DAVID
Everything okay?
MADISON
Sure. Where am I?
DAVID
Six. And there’s only one busboy for the entire house tonight.
MADISON
That blows.
DAVID
Labour and food costs are too high and reservations are too low. How are things at home?
Pause.
Madison?
MADISON
Royce had some kind of—breakdown. They’re doing tests in the hospital. He’s like totally bipolar or something. He’s—so sad.
DAVID
The doctors will help him be less sad.
MADISON
That’s not the same as happy.
DAVID
It’s a start.
MADISON
Mom’s moving out—but not till the Royce thing’s resolved.
DAVID
What’s your dad doing through all this?
MADISON
Drinking a lot of beer smoking like a chimney and living at the office.
DAVID
Great.
MADISON
I want to tell them. What we did.
DAVID
Absolutely not.
MADISON
The truth makes things better.
DAVID
This isn’t about the truth. This is about getting back at your parents and making them responsible for our bad decision.
MADISON
Why would I want to hurt them?
DAVID
It takes the spotlight off of Royce and puts it back on you.
MADISON
Fuck you.
DAVID
Time to grow up.
MADISON
I still think I should.
DAVID
Don’t do it Madison. I mean it.
MADISON
Are you threatening me?
DAVID
Yes.
MADISON
But I feel so guilty.
DAVID
That’s how we adults remember our mistakes. Now get set up. We open in fifteen minutes.
MADISON
You’re an asshole.
DAVID
I know. Now do your fucking job.
Lights rise on CAROLYN in a hospital room with ROYCE.
CAROLYN
The doctor says you’re doing quite well.
ROYCE
Yeah.
CAROLYN
The talks with the therapist?
ROYCE
Okay.
CAROLYN
The pills?
ROYCE
Helping.
CAROLYN
You’re not having compulsive suicidal thoughts are you? We’re supposed to watch for that.
ROYCE
No.
CAROLYN
They said something about possible—sexual side effects.
ROYCE
I’m asexual Mom.
CAROLYN
Is that—official now?
ROYCE
Yes.
CAROLYN
We accept you for who you are.
ROYCE
The doctor suggested some websites and support groups.
CAROLYN
I’m sure you’ll find them very helpful.
ROYCE
They’re for you and Dad.
CAROLYN
Right of course. Do you feel like you might want to come home soon?
ROYCE
Are you still sleeping in the den?
CAROLYN
It doesn’t matter where I’m sleeping as long as we’re all together.
ROYCE
I miss those horrible sounds you guys made when you got it on.
CAROLYN
Stop.
ROYCE
Can’t you?
CAROLYN
I don’t think I can.
ROYCE
Why not?
CAROLYN
My feelings have—changed.
ROYCE
Love can’t just go away.
CAROLYN
No but it does become—other things. Other kinds of love.
ROYCE
And this is all because of the Montreal thing?
CAROLYN
No.
ROYCE
Does every marriage fail?
CAROLYN
No but a lot of them expire.
ROYCE
Then why get married?
CAROLYN
When you fall in love with someone you have to believe it’s forever. It’s not real otherwise.
ROYCE
Are you on medication?
CAROLYN
Just half a lorazepam before I came in. My doctor prescribed them. They help a lot. Anyway love—you know—that one word doesn’t really do the job of describing how mixed-up those feelings really are. My feelings for your father have changed. I don’t love him the way I used to but I do still love him.
ROYCE
But not enough to stay.
CAROLYN
Right.
ROYCE
Thanks.
CAROLYN
For what?
ROYCE
Not lying to me.
CAROLYN
Come home Royce. You’re ready
ROYCE
Okay.
KANE enters.
KANE
Things at the school took longer than expected.
CAROLYN
And?
KANE
And I’ve got all of your assignments for the rest of the term so you never have to go back there again.
ROYCE
Thanks Pop.
CAROLYN
Royce is ready to come home.
KANE
You’re sure?
ROYCE
Yeah. This place is boring.
KANE
Alright.
ROYCE
They want me to come in every other day for a while—I start group therapy next week—and I have to stay on the meds.
CAROLYN
Of course.
ROYCE
They want me to do some sessions with you guys too.
KANE
Of course. Royce. We.
ROYCE
Yeah.
KANE
We love you.
CAROLYN
More than anything in life.
ROYCE
Even if I’m crazy.
KANE
You’re not crazy.
ROYCE
But I’m.
CAROLYN
Recovering. You’re recovering.
KANE
Let’s go.
Lights rise on DAVID at the restaurant checking cash envelopes. MADISON enters with her envelope.
MADISON
One of the chairs is off-kilter at five C.
DAVID
I’ll get it fixed. How’s Royce?
MADISON
He’s started talking to me again. For real. He told me about the gun thing. Thank you.
DAVID
It was a cry for help.
MADISON
But pretty fucked up.
DAVID
He’s getting what he needs now.
MADISON
You were right about telling my parents too. It would have made everything worse. I just—secrets have a way of getting out.
DAVID
Not when it’s shared by only two people. A secret’s not the same as a lie. There’s cassoulet left over. Are you hungry?
MADISON
Yeah but well no—I told some of the guys I’d meet them in a few minutes.
DAVID
Is Willett going?
MADISON
He’ll probably be there.
DAVID
He makes you laugh.
MADISON
Yeah.
DAVID
Not too hard on the eyes either.
MADISON
Okay now you’re starting to sound jealous.
DAVID
I’d gotten used to—having someone to eat with.
MADISON
We’ll eat again.
DAVID
But not like we used to.
MADISON
No and that’s totally my fault. I just have this thing where I have to fuck every guy I meet. I need to work on it and I will really. But right now I gotta.
DAVID
Don’t worry. Good night.
MADISON exits. DAVID goes to the kitchen briefly and returns with a bowl of food, a glass and a carafe of wine. He pours himself a large glass of wine and sits down to eat alone. Lights rise on the kitchen of the Sawatsky house, empty. MADISON enters dressed entirely in black. She moves to a counter, pulls out a bottle of vodka and pours a slug into a glass. She downs the shot and pours more. ROYCE enters, also in black. He shares a look with MADISON, reaches into his pocket and takes out a pill bottle. He takes a pill using what’s left of MADISON’s vodka to wash it down.
MADISON
Those help?
ROYCE
It’s like being wrapped in something cloudy.
MADISON
But you don’t feel as down.
ROYCE
I don’t feel as anything.
MADISON
Great.
KANE enters dressed entirely in black.
Shot?
KANE
Set me up.
MADISON pours a shot into a glass and hands it to KANE. KANE downs the shot and holds the glass out to MADISON. She pours another shot into it.
MADISON
Funerals are vile traditions.
KANE
They help with closure.
CAROLYN enters dressed in black.
CAROLYN
Closure’s overrated.
MADISON waves the bottle at her mother.
MADISON
Takes the edge off.
CAROLYN
Okay.
MADISON pours her mother a shot. KANE raises his glass.
KANE
To Herbert Carver.
CAROLYN
It was nice of so many of his former students to show up.
MADISON
They were so old.
CAROLYN
He loved to read. It was like a religion to him. He picked a book for each year of my childhood and read it to me until I was old enough to read myself. Then he gave me a book for every birthday until he—got sick. It was how we communicated.
MADISON
Who besides me needs another drink?
ROYCE
There’s something I should probably tell you guys.
Pause.
CAROLYN
Well?
ROYCE
I’ve met someone. Special.
KANE
Someone?
CAROLYN
Special? But I thought you were.
ROYCE
I am.
KANE
And is she he?
ROYCE
She. Her uncle raped her repeatedly between the ages of two and seven so she hates sex. She’s the sister of this guy I know from group. Her name’s Tasha. She’s not very pretty but she’s really smart. And funny.
Pause.
CAROLYN
Good for you.
ROYCE
We share feelings of inadequacy and internalized self-hatred.
KANE
It’s important to have things in common.
ROYCE
And our med cycles are simpatico.
MADISON
Great.
ROYCE
The doctor says it’s a sign of progress.
MADISON
I have an announcement of my own.
CAROLYN
What’s that?
MADISON
Willett and I are going to try monogamy.
Pause.
KANE
Who the hell’s Willett?
MADISON
My boyfriend.
CAROLYN
Boyfriend?
MADISON
I’ve been seeing him for nearly two months.
CAROLYN
Is he—nice?
MADISON
He thinks he’s far smarter and better looking than he actually is but I really kinda like him.
ROYCE
And he’s a waiter?
MADISON
Just part-time while he goes to university.
CAROLYN
Great. What’s he taking?
MADISON
Political science don’t even get me started. If the relationship lasts another two months I’ll introduce you.
CAROLYN
I found an apartment.
Pause.
It’s just a few blocks away. Walking distance.
Pause.
I also found a job. I’m going to be doing the books for a trucking company.
MADISON
Trucking company?
ROYCE
Whoa.
CAROLYN
I liked the women in their bookkeeping office.
MADISON pours KANE a shot. He downs it.
ROYCE
I guess if it’ll make you happier.
MADISON
Right.
CAROLYN
There are two extra bedrooms. You kids can stay
whenever you want.
ROYCE
Great.
MADISON
I wouldn’t be very comfortable sleeping there.
CAROLYN
You’ll get used to it eventually.
MADISON
I hate it when you say things like that.
CAROLYN
That’s why I say them.
MADISON
I know.
KANE
Well okay then now.
Pause.
MADISON
I’m meeting Willett.
KANE
Don’t be too late.
MADISON kisses KANE.
MADISON
Don’t wait up.
CAROLYN
Please don’t hate me forever.
MADISON
Working on it.
MADISON exits.
ROYCE
I’m tired and my mouth is really dry.
CAROLYN
Good night sweetie. We’ll talk tomorrow.
ROYCE exits.
KANE
It’s not going to be as great as you think.
CAROLYN
Whatever it was we were meant to do together—it’s done. It is. You know it too. It’s all just habit now. Fear of the unknown.
KANE
But I love you.
CAROLYN
I know.
Pause.
Don’t forget to replace the furnace.
KANE
Right.
CAROLYN exits. KANE goes to the fridge and gets himself a beer. He sits at the table and sips the beer. Lights rise on DAVID in the restaurant. He’s looking at the reservation book and shaking his head. MADISON enters.
MADISON
What’s going on?
DAVID
What?
MADISON
You haven’t looked me in the eye for the last two days.
DAVID
Let’s talk after your shift.
MADISON
I’d rather talk now.
DAVID
After your shift is better. Really.
MADISON
You’re going to fire me.
DAVID
Yes.
MADISON
Why?
DAVID
My costs are through the roof and with this downswing.
MADISON
Why me?
DAVID
Last hired first fired.
MADISON
That’s me and Willett.
DAVID
And three of the kitchen staff and one dishwasher.
MADISON
This is about him isn’t it?
DAVID
No.
MADISON
I see you watching us all the time.
DAVID
I watch you and Willett because I can see you falling in love and it’s such a wonderful thing I can’t not look.
MADISON
Seriously?
DAVID
I don’t think Willett’s the sharpest knife in the drawer and thankfully I doubt he’s going to be your one great love but I know you’re enjoying it and that makes me feel—surprisingly good.
MADISON
But you still have to fire me.
DAVID
Yes. You won’t have any trouble finding another job. You should be someplace where you can make real money anyway.
MADISON
True. Think Mary’ll close the place?
DAVID
Hopefully not—if we can get our budgets in line. I’ll probably pick up some floor shifts.
MADISON
Waiting? Really?
DAVID nods.
That’s sad.
DAVID
Anything necessary to survive. You don’t have to work your shift if.
MADISON
Don’t worry. I’ll do it.
DAVID
You’re sure?
MADISON moves to DAVID and gives him a quick kiss.
MADISON
Thank you.
DAVID kisses her again.
DAVID
No thank you.
They hug.
Dinner later?
Short pause.
MADISON
You know it.
MADISON exits. Lights rise on CAROLYN at her new place. She’s getting ready to go out. There’s a knock at the door and ROYCE enters using his key.
CAROLYN
Hey handsome.
ROYCE
That your new car in the lot?
CAROLYN
Like it?
ROYCE
It’s kinda showy.
CAROLYN
That’s the point.
ROYCE
I like it. Tasha and I are on our way to the cat show. You wanna come?
CAROLYN
That’s so sweet. Where is Tasha?
ROYCE
Didn’t want to come in because she saw one of her dead guys sitting on your steps.
CAROLYN
Thanks but I already have plans.
ROYCE
Like a date?
CAROLYN
Like drinks with some of the girls from work.
ROYCE
Sounds fun.
CAROLYN
Thanks beats sitting alone in front of the TV for another night. How’s Kane?
ROYCE
Don’t ask.
CAROLYN
Try to get him out of the house.
ROYCE
We’re working on it. Have fun.
CAROLYN
You too.
ROYCE blows CAROLYN a kiss then exits. Lights rise on the restaurant. DAVID is carrying two plates of food to a table. KANE enters.
DAVID
She’s just finishing up. This is her last night.
KANE
You finally fired her?
DAVID
Business is shit.
KANE
Sorry to hear that.
DAVID
But not sorry to see her go.
KANE
It doesn’t really matter anymore.
DAVID
She won’t have a problem finding another job. She’s very good. Hold on. I’ll get her.
DAVID gestures for KANE to sit at the table and exits. KANE is tempted by the wonderful smell of the pasta. He dips his finger into the sauce on one plate and tastes it. It’s amazing. DAVID enters with MADISON’s apron, billfold, cash envelope, etc.
Apparently she finished her section early and slipped out the back door.
KANE
She phoned me for a ride half an hour ago.
DAVID
Debra saw her drive away with Willett.
KANE
Then why would she need a ride?
DAVID
She knew I was making a final dinner.
Short pause.
Oh.
KANE
Oh.
DAVID
Yes.
KANE
Set-up and everything.
DAVID
She mentioned you weren’t getting out much.
KANE
She says you never go anywhere.
DAVID
She’s wrong. I go to lots of places. Just no place fun.
KANE
What is this?
DAVID
Three-cheese tortellini in an aromatic tomato vodka sauce.
KANE
Smells amazing.
DAVID
Hungry?
KANE
I’ve been eating out of the microwave for months.
DAVID
Would you like to join me?
KANE
You wouldn’t mind?
Short pause.
DAVID
No.
KANE
Okay.
DAVID
Wine?
KANE
Please.
DAVID pours wine for them both.
DAVID
How you doing?
KANE
My family’s fallen apart. You?
DAVID
My restaurant’s failing and I have no life or friends.
Pause.
KANE
I am such a total failure.
DAVID
No.
KANE
My wife—my kids are—
DAVID
Fucked up. Who isn’t? They’re essentially good people—and interesting. That’s more than a lot of parents accomplish.
KANE
Since Carolyn left me. I can’t. It’s. Just.
Pause.
DAVID
Have some wine.
KANE
Thanks. Sorry. Can I smoke in here?
DAVID
No.
KANE
I’ve been very—emotional lately.
DAVID
Perfectly understandable.
KANE
I bet you feel like you know my family almost as well as I do.
DAVID
Almost.
Pause.
KANE
I still don’t understand any of this.
DAVID
Shit happens. We never really know why.
KANE
It’s been a long time.
DAVID
Doesn’t seem like it.
KANE
I guess there’s a lot we can catch up on.
DAVID
Yeah. And we will. Later.
KANE
You’re sure? That might be kinda weird after everything.
DAVID
Kane.
KANE
What?
DAVID
Eat.
They eat as the lights slowly fade to black.