CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

WHO’S BEEN SLEEPING IN MY SHED?

CRASH!

Jonny’s foot smashed through the door, which swung open violently. His nails left claw marks on the edge of the shed roof as he tried to cling on, before he landed on his back inside the shed, with one foot still stuck in the door.

‘Welcome!’ said a voice.

Jonny looked up and yelped like he’d seen a ghost. Only he hadn’t seen a ghost. Not this time.

‘Pete?’ said Jonny.

‘Pip, actually. Remember?’ she said. ‘Or Pete-Pip. That’s fine if it’s easier. Whatever you like. Anyway! Good to see you! Do you want some help getting your foot out of the door?’

Pete-Pip was sitting at a desk that almost filled the shed. It was loaded with tech, including a laptop, several monitors and three separate keyboards.

‘Where have you … ? How did you … ? Eh … ?!’ Jonny spluttered. ‘Didn’t you go back to Sibling Swap?’

‘Umm, no, in the end, I didn’t!’ said Pete-Pip. ‘I was going to, then I realised I might be better off observing your next swap, rather than being one myself. Then I noticed your shed and got set up here! Thanks for the Wi-Fi, by the way. Here, let’s get your leg free.’

‘So are you going home?’ Jonny asked, sitting down now that his foot was liberated from the shed door.

‘Soon,’ said Pete-Pip. ‘I wanted to complete my research and see how your next brother panned out.’

‘Oh, thanks,’ he said. Jonny thought that was quite nice of Pete-Pip, although he didn’t like to admit it out loud.

‘Will you be getting another swap now that the other guy has gone?’ Pete-Pip asked, pointing at the shed roof.

J2! Jonny had momentarily forgotten about him. Then he shuddered, as if shaking off a bad dream.

‘Another swap?’ he said. ‘No. There won’t be another swap. This is over. Sibling Swap is over! Flipping swear word, it’s all over, over, over! It doesn’t work, and I want out. I don’t want any new brothers or ghost brothers or meerkat brothers or merboys or little crazy betting kids or a tech-mad brother who isn’t even a brother, he’s a sister or …’

‘What do you want, then?’ asked Pete-Pip.

Jonny blinked hard and thought for a second.

‘I want my real brother back,’ he said. ‘I want Ted.’