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WEEKS PASSED. THE WINTER snows came and soon the Christmas season filled store windows with gift ideas and gay decorations. Alice hung the last ornament on their tree. It was a crude star she’d made in Sunday School when she was five. Fashioned out of yellow yarn wrapped around sticks, it had become lopsided and frayed over the years, but it was always her mother’s favorite and hung in the most prominent spot on the tree.
She hadn’t wanted to celebrate Christmas after all that happened—the epidemic, her parents’ deaths, Harry and Betty’s betrayal. It was Jack who brought the tree home the day before. It was Jack who insisted Christmas was what she needed to get back on her feet. He even invited Doc to join them for Christmas dinner, which meant she was also obligated to cook a feast. She’d sent Jack into town with a list for all the fixings.
That was the one thing she’d put her foot down about. She was not going into town. Not even for the Christmas Eve church service. Aunt Caroline made certain they knew Harry and Betty would be visiting for the holidays. Alice was not ready to face everyone with those two sitting front and center in the Barnes family pew.
Jack sipped his coffee. “What will people think if you’re not there?”
“You know what they’ll think, and they’ll be right. But if you must have an alternate story, you can tell them I’m sick. Tell them I broke my leg slipping on the ice. Tell them I’ve gone stark raving mad with grief, and you were forced to lock me in the attic. I don’t care.”
As if the night of the Armistice celebration wasn’t bad enough, the afternoon of Fin and Lizzie’s wedding was worse. There was no missing the looks she got when Jack drove them into town for the ceremony on that cold November day so soon after news of Harry and Betty’s marriage. The way people pointed, nodded, whispered to each other behind their hands. Jack insisted he didn’t see it, but Alice sure did.
He set his empty cup by the sink. “Then I’m not going to the Christmas Eve service, either.” That was when he went out and got the tree, before she could argue with him about all the reasons it made no sense for him to stay away, as well. It would only lead to more gossip and rumors.
After he set up the tree in the parlor, he took a small bundle from his pocket and tucked it behind the mantle clock. Had he bought her a present? She hadn’t thought to get him anything, and she really didn’t want to go to Erikson’s, the center of the town’s Christmas spirit. So, after he returned to his own room that night, she pulled out her mother’s knitting basket. There she found enough yarn to make him a scarf. His old one was thin and ratty. Now that it was winter, he’d surely be wishing for a new one. It would have to be a mishmash of colors, but at least it would be warm. And something told her Jack would love it no matter what color, or colors, she used.
No one was sweeter to her than Jack since Harry’s humiliation and Betty’s betrayal. He never declared his love, not with words, anyway. But it was there in the way he looked at her, the way he always had a clean handkerchief at the ready when she started to cry. He never seemed to tire of listening to her when she was sad or angry. But it wasn’t fair to him. And it was certainly no way for her to live her life going forward. Soon she’d have to make a decision about her future.
She stepped back to inspect the tree from all angles. It was a beautiful tree. Jack always did pick the best. Not a single gap in the branches, and they never needed to trim off the top to fit the angel.
The kitchen door smacked against the wall. “I could use a hand here,” Jack called out. Fritzi ran to her side, tracking mud and snow with him.
She grabbed his collar and dragged him back into the kitchen. “Outside with you.” A crate of supplies sat on the kitchen table and the door stood open. Jack was nowhere to be seen. She shoved Fritzi out the door and almost ran into Jack bearing a second crate. “Oh, my, such a lot of food.” Alice held her face in her hands and laughed.
“It was a long list.” Jack pushed the door closed with his foot and set the second crate next to the first.
Alice dug through the first crate. “Did Erikson’s have that leather-bound journal I wanted for Doc?”
“In here.” Jack tapped the second crate. “Olga double wrapped it to keep it dry.” He looked around. “Where’s Fritzi?”
“Outside. If he’s coming in, you have to wipe his paws first. Look at this mess.”
“Sorry. He got away from me.” Jack took a dish towel and wiped the floor.
“Don’t use my good towels.” Alice grabbed it away. “Go!” She shooed him toward the door. “Your boots aren’t any better than Fritzi’s paws. Don’t you have some chores to do out in the barn?”
“Always.” Jack slipped his hands into his jacket pockets and walked away whistling. He turned back at the barn door and sung out at the top of his lungs. “We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.”
She shook her head and laughed.
* * *
CHRISTMAS DINNER WITH Jack and Doc felt like family. Alice was glad Jack insisted they celebrate.
“More pie, Doc?” She held the plate out to tempt him. When he hesitated, she knew it was working.
He waved her off. “I couldn’t possibly eat another bite. Besides, I know apple is Jack’s favorite. You should save the last slice for him.”
“All pies are Jack’s favorite.”
Jack nodded. “She’s right there. I couldn’t possibly rank one over another.”
“Besides,” Alice pointed to the kitchen, “I baked a second one for Jack. So, you needn’t worry about him.”
“Well, when you put it that way.” Doc slid his dessert plate in her direction. “I think I found a little bit more room, just big enough for one more slice of pie.”
She topped off his coffee. “Jack?”
“Yes, please.” He held out his cup for a refill. “Does that mean I can take the other pie to my room later? I expect to get really hungry during the night.”
“Promise me you won’t give any to Fritzi. No matter how hard he begs.” Fritzi’s head popped up at the mention of his name. She shook a finger at him. “Yes, we’re talking about you.” He laid his head down with a whimper. Alice fed him a bite of turkey in consolation then poured the last of the coffee into her cup. Fritzi settled down and went back to sleep.
It actually felt like Christmas, despite her earlier concerns. She’d set her mother’s dining room table with her best linens and her grandmother’s wedding china. Candles flickered in the center of the table, with more on the tree. The only difference was the lack of gaily wrapped gifts beneath. Normally there’d be at least a half dozen boxes tempting them in the days leading up to Christmas Eve. But this year there was only the one for Doc. She’d hidden her gift for Jack.
Betty sent something a couple days earlier. The card on top read, From our happy home to yours, Merry Christmas.
She was going to return it unopened, but her curiosity got the best of her. It was a silk scarf, green to match her eyes. Lovely but of no use to her on the farm. She hoped Betty was happy—and Harry, to be truthful. Betty certainly appeared to be happy spending Harry’s money.
She folded the scarf and tucked it back into the box, giving Jack strict instructions to return it.
“What do you want me to say?” He buttoned his coat.
“Nothing.” She paused. “On second thought, tell her thank you, but no thank you. Tell her I don’t want anything from her, from them, other than to be left alone. Tell her we are no longer friends, and if she thinks that might someday change, she is sadly mistaken. Tell her I loathe the both of them and I never want to see anything of them again.” Her hands were shaking. Jack took the box before she dropped it.
“Are you sure you want me to say all that?”
“No. No message.” Better to say nothing than something she might feel sorry for later. She couldn’t put all the blame on Betty. Harry was at least as much at fault. But for some reason, Betty’s betrayal hurt so much more than Harry’s.
“Everything was delicious.” Doc brought Alice back to the moment. “I won’t have to eat again until the new year. Not with all I had today. Jack, you’re one lucky man to be able to eat like this every day.”
Alice stacked their plates to take to the kitchen. “Thank you, but I can assure you, we don’t eat like this every day.”
Jack jumped up and took her hand to stop her. “Let me. You did all the cooking.”
She sat down with a sigh “You won’t get an argument from me.” It was nice not to think about all the dirty pots and pans piled up in the kitchen. Her mother told her once never to argue with a man when he offers to help.
Doc patted his stomach. “I could stand to move around a little myself.” He picked up the bowl of potatoes in one hand and the gravy boat in the other. “We’ll just put the leftovers in the icebox and stack the dishes for now. After, we can enjoy some of the cherry cordial I brought. I have something I want to talk to you about, Alice.” He took the leftovers to the kitchen then returned for the pie plate and coffee pot.
Alice raised an eyebrow. Jack shrugged and took their plates. She found her mother’s cordial glasses and soon they were sitting in the parlor, enjoying the tree, the wood fire, and Doc’s delicious cherry cordial. She handed him his gift.
“What’s this?” He set down his glass and peeled back the green paper. “Oh, my.” He ran a hand down the leather cover. “Thank you. It’s beautiful.”
“I noticed your current journal is almost full and I wanted to thank you for all you did for me these past months. I can’t imagine where I’d be right now without you.”
“Speaking of the epidemic, I was wondering if you’d given any thought to what to do now that your future plans have changed.”
“I have. I know I want to continue nursing, but not a formal nursing school. I couldn’t go away for that long, even with how things are here right now.”
Doc smiled. “I’m glad to hear it. You’re a natural.”
Jack leaned forward, his arms resting on his knees. “Doc, does your offer still stand to train her yourself?”
“It does, but I think I have something better to start with.” He hesitated then took a deep breath. “As you said, things have been difficult for you with all the gossip. You’ve secluded yourself out here on the farm, refusing to even go into town. It’s not healthy.”
Alice lowered her eyes and toyed with her empty glass, running her finger over the delicate etching. “What would you suggest? I go into town, hold my head high, and ignore all the giggles and whispers?”
“Eventually, yes. But first, it might not be a bad idea for you to go away for a while.”
Jack’s chair wobbled when he jumped to his feet. “You aren’t suggesting a hospital, Doc. Alice has been a little sad, who wouldn’t be, but she’s not mad.”
“Heavens, no.” Doc waved his hands. “Alice, I’ve heard of a short-term private nursing position I think would be perfect for you. And it couldn’t have come at a better time.”
She held her breath. Hadn’t this been the sort of thing she’d been thinking about the last few days? A chance to go where no one knew about her misfortune? Then there was Jack’s proposal. He said he loved her and, surprisingly, she said it back.
“Why me? I’ve never worked on my own.”
“You wouldn’t be entirely on your own. I was talking to an old friend of mine, Doctor Joseph Gifford. He’s currently practicing in Bay Waters, a small town much like Pine Lake, along the shores of Lake Superior. Anyway, he has a female patient, Prudence Carthage. Seventy-five years old. Lives alone. She suffered a stroke and has no family to tend to her. She refuses to go to a hospital, but she does have the money to pay for a private nurse.”
Jack reached out and took Alice’s hand. She held on tight. “You said this would be a short-term position, Doc?”
“Mrs. Carthage has a bad heart, and the stroke has only added to the strain. Joseph doesn’t expect she’ll last the winter. What do you say, Alice? You can take a few days to think about it, if you wish, but I told him I’d let him know before year’s end so he can inquire elsewhere, if necessary.”
Alice’s thoughts were a whirl, excited and frightened all at the same time. “What do you think, Jack?”
“It would be a great opportunity for you.”
“What about the farm? The animals? Fritzi?” She’d never been away from home before, not even for the night. The only reason she agreed to move to Minneapolis with Harry was because they were getting married.
Now, here was Jack encouraging her to go all the way to Bay Waters alone, to live in a strange house with a woman she didn’t know. And he was allowing her to make up her own mind, rather than make the decision for her.
“I’ll take care of everything while you’re gone—if you want to go, that is.”
Doc stood to leave. “Give me a ring in a couple days, either way. I can help you make any necessary arrangements. In the meantime, it’s starting to snow, and I’d like to get home before dark.”
Alice hugged him. “Thank you for spending Christmas with us. And thank you for your confidence in my abilities as a nurse. You’ve given me a lot to consider.”
He gave Alice a kiss on the cheek and shook Jack’s hand. “Merry Christmas, Alice. And a very Merry Christmas to you, as well, Jack. Thank you, again, for the invite. Dinner was delicious. And for the beautiful journal.” They walked him to the door and Alice helped him on with his coat. “Keep the cherry cordial,” he added when Jack held out the bottle. “There’s enough for one more glass each. It’s a special occasion, after all.” He pushed his hat down tight and stepped out into the snow.
Jack grabbed his coat. “Hang on, Doc. I’ll walk out with you.” He pointed a finger at Alice. “And don’t you even think of washing up until I get back.” He looked her in the eye. “Promise me.”
“I promise.” She closed the door behind him and surveyed the kitchen mess. It wouldn’t hurt to get a start on things. He wouldn’t be gone long, and she always found it helpful to keep busy when facing a problem or decision.
She was elbow-deep in soapy water when Jack returned.
“I said I’d wash them.” He hung his coat on the peg and left his snow-covered boots on the mat.
“I only did Grandmother’s most delicate china pieces. You can do the rest.” She indicated the dirty pots and pans with her elbow.
He hung his coat on a peg by the door. “This is how much your promises are worth?” He grumbled and shook his head.
“I knew how upset you’d be if you chipped or broke something.” She dried her hands on a towel before starting on the things she’d washed.
Jack rolled up his sleeves and scrubbed at the potato pot while she put the china and crystal away in the dining room cabinet. Her mind raced with all the exciting possibilities. She looked around the parlor.
Could I do it? Could I go away even for a little while?
“What do you think of Doc’s idea?” Jack asked her when she returned to the kitchen. He had finished the pots and was wiping down the countertop. “Would you want to go to Bay Waters, be a nurse for real?”
“I don’t know, Jack. Do you think I should?”
“It doesn’t matter what I think. You need to make the decision that’s best for you.” He was watching her.
She’d never had to make such a big decision on her own before. “It would be a wonderful chance to do something I want for a change.”
“Then it sounds to me like you have your answer.” He wiped his hands and hung the towel.
“I think maybe I have.” Alice tried to read Jack’s reaction. He sounded happy for her, but somewhere underneath she sensed a certain sadness.
He sighed. “I’ll miss you.” He unrolled his sleeves.
“I’ll miss you, too, Jack, but I’ll be back. I couldn’t stay away from Pine Lake for long.”
He chuckled. “Promise me you’ll consider my proposal while you’re gone. I know it’s too soon after Harry, and that’s why I haven’t said anything before now, but my feelings haven’t changed. I love you and nothing would make me happier than if you agreed to be my wife.”
She cupped his face between her hands and gave him a kiss. He kissed her back, not a passionate kiss like the one before, but a gentle kiss leaving her aching for more. “And I promise I will have an answer for you when I return.”
“All right. For now, let’s go back into the parlor and have that second glass of cordial. I like the way the first glass made your cheeks glow. Wonder what a second glass will do.”
She gasped. “Jack Barnes!”
“Besides, I have something for you.” He took her hand and led her out of the kitchen.
Alice poured them each one last glass. Her heart raced with anticipation as he retrieved the small mystery package from behind the mantle clock.
“I have one for you, too.” She reached under the settee and pulled out a flat box. “We can open them at the same time.”
Fritzi joined them to see what all the paper rustling was about. He nipped at the piece she’d folded and set aside to use again. “No!” She raised her hand to slap his nose and he backed off. “You know better.” She opened the small box. In it was a gold locket. And inside the locket were pictures of her parents. Alice clutched the locket to her chest and suppressed a sob. “Where did you find the photos?”
“I cut them from the faculty page of my senior yearbook. I don’t need pictures to remember their faces. But now you can take them with you anywhere you go.”
She gave her parents’ smiling faces one final look before closing it.
He stood. “Here. Let me help you put it on.”
Alice pulled her hair aside. “I love it. Thank you. Now open yours.”
He tore at the paper. “How’d you know I need a new scarf?”
“Everyone in town knows you need a new scarf.” She laughed. “You don’t mind all the different colors, do you? I matched as best I could with what mother had left in her basket.”
“It’s perfect.”
“Look in the bottom of the box. There’s a little something else.”
Jack pushed the tissue paper aside to find the small bundle of scrap cloth. “This isn’t . . .”
“Open it and see.” Tears formed in the corners of her eyes.
Jack gently laid open the cloth. “Your father’s cuff links.”
“He would have wanted you to have them.” Alice’s voice cracked. “He always thought of you like a son.”
“I don’t know what to say, other than, it was an honor to work for your father.” He blew his nose. “Um. I think I’d better be getting to bed. It’s late. I’ll help you put out the candles on the tree first then I’ll take Fritzi with me.”
“And the pie,” she reminded him.
* * *
ALICE STOOD ON THE train station platform with her friends. She wrapped her scarf tight to hold out the wind blowing from the north. It was the last day of 1918, a year that brought so much sadness, so much loss, but now promised a future she never would have dreamt of a couple months earlier.
Doc took her arm and they stepped back against the building and out of the wind. He handed her a letter of introduction for Doctor Gifford. “He’ll meet you at the Bay Waters station.”
Jack directed the station master’s sons to where her trunk waited and handed Alice her ticket.
Doc squeezed her arm. “Keep in touch. I expect lots of letters telling me all about your experiences. When you return, we’ll talk about whether or not you want to continue training with me.”
“I’ll write every week,” she assured him. “I think I packed enough stamps and stationery to write everyone in town.”
Lizzie and Fin hugged her in turn. “I hope so,” Lizzie said, breathless from the cold. “Fin and I expect letters, too.” The girls hugged again. “Oh, Alice, what a wonderful adventure for you.”
“Slow down, little mama,” Alice mock scolded. “I want to hear from you, too.”
“What did you call her?” Jack looked from Alice, to Lizzie, to Fin.
Alice covered her mouth with a gloved hand. “Oh, dear. Sorry, Lizzie.”
“That’s all right.” Lizzie turned to Jack. “It’s true. I’m going to have a baby. But not everyone knows yet so—” She put a finger to her lips.
“Your secret’s safe with me.”
“Come along, you two.” Doc put a hand on the back of each of the young Finleys. “Let’s give these two a chance to say their goodbyes before the train gets here.”
Betty appeared in a whirl from around the side of the stationhouse. “Thank goodness I caught you before the train came and I missed my chance to say goodbye and congratulate you on your new nursing career.”
Alice stiffened when Betty threw her arms around her.
“Sorry.” Betty apologized with an awkward wave of a hand. “It’s just been so long since I saw you, and when you weren’t at Christmas service . . .”
“Is that real fur?” Lizzie lightly touched Betty’s sleeve.
“Ermine.” Betty adjusted the matching hat with one hand. “The muff, too. Do you like them?”
“They look warm.” Lizzie’s hand trailed down the sleeve. “And expensive. Harry must be doing well.”
“He is, but these were a Christmas gift from my in-laws.”
“They’re very nice.” Alice tried unsuccessfully to smile and sound sincere. Her knees shook, whether from the cold or Betty’s unexpected arrival, she couldn’t say. Jack slipped an arm around her waist on one side. Lizzie and Fin stepped in closer on the other.
“What happened to your cheek?” Doc lightly touched Betty’s face. “That’s quite a bruise shining through your powder.”
Betty forced a smile and waved away their concerns. “It’s nothing, Doc. I slipped on a wet floor and hit the doorjamb.”
Alice and Lizzie exchanged looks. It seemed to be the go-to excuse for every woman who showed up in town with fresh bruising.
“Well, I’d better be on my way.” Doc tipped his hat. “I have a patient coming in shortly. Nice to see you, Betty.” He hurried away.
“I should be going, too.” Betty hesitated. “I just wanted to see you, Alice. I’ve missed both of you. Maybe we can get together when you return, like old times . . . before . . .”
Lizzie shrugged. “Maybe.”
Alice searched for a believable excuse. “I’m going to be really busy.” She wasn’t ready to forgive Betty.
“Of course.” Betty’s voice cracked. “Your nursing.”
“Yes.”
A shrill whistle signaled her train’s approach.
Betty fidgeted with her hand muff. “Goodbye, Alice. Good luck.” She walked away.
Alice let out a slow breath. Her heart raced faster than the train.
Jack held her tight. “Do you want to sit down?”
“I’m fine.” It was true. She was fine and would continue being fine despite Harry and Betty.
Lizzie linked an arm in hers. “Did you believe the story she gave Doc about her cheek?”
“You’re not suggesting Harry hit her, are you?” Alice shook her head. “No. Harry’s a lot of things, and he’s definitely changed since the war, but he’d never hit a woman.”
Lizzie shrugged. “Like you said, he’s changed. He’s not the same old Harry.”
Alice turned to Fin. “You probably know Harry better than any of us now.”
He didn’t answer. “We need to go.” He hugged her.” Goodbye, Alice.”
Lizzie kissed her and hugged her tight. “Write me lots of letters.” She sniffed and wiped away her tears. “I promise to write back.”
“I will, and I promise I’ll be home before the baby.” She waved as Fin rushed his sobbing wife home and out of the cold. She faced Jack. The hardest goodbye of them all.
His smile faded. He laid a gentle hand on her cheek. “Goodbye, Alice.”
“Not goodbye.” She wiped a tear from her cheek. “See you soon.”
“See you soon.” Jack’s voice cracked. He cleared his throat.
The train whistle blew again, its great engine belching smoke and ash as it chugged around the bend. “That would be for me.” She nodded at the approaching train. “You better go, too. I’m going to really start crying if you stay any longer.” She dug a handkerchief out of her handbag and dabbed at the corners of her eyes.
Jack kissed her. A soft kiss ending with a hint of the passion she was leaving behind. Without any doubt, she knew what her answer would be when she returned to Pine Lake.