Chapter

Back in Al’s apartment, Woody heard the doorbell ring. Al opened the door to reveal the Cleaner, a little old man carrying a large case that resembled a doctor’s bag.

“Is the specimen ready for cleaning?” the Cleaner asked Al. He slammed his case down on a table and opened it. On the left side was a foldout shelf full of all kinds of tools. On the right side was a little cabinet with an air compressor inside. The Cleaner pressed a button and a miniature hat rack popped up. He took Woody’s hat and hung it on one of the hooks. Then he gently placed Woody in a vise that looked like a tiny dentist’s chair, and began to examine the toy closely.

“How long is this going to take?” asked Al impatiently.

“You can’t rush art,” replied the Cleaner. He dipped a cotton swab into a cleaning solution and began to wipe Woody’s eyes and ears. He then used the air compressor to spray paint onto Woody’s cheeks and over a worn spot on his head.

Next he pulled out his strongest magnifying lens and positioned it in front of Woody. Then he threaded a needle and began to stitch Woody’s arm into place. A few minutes later, Woody’s arm was back where it belonged.

The Cleaner used a tiny rag to shine Woody’s boots. Then he picked up one boot and applied a coat of paint to the sole, covering Andy’s name. He positioned Woody carefully back in his case and then, with a satisfied chuckle, placed Woody’s hat on his head.

“He’s for display only,” warned the Cleaner. “You handle him too much, he’s not going to last.”

“You’re a genius!” cried Al. “Oh, he’s just like new!”

Meanwhile, Buzz and his rescue party were almost at Al’s Toy Barn. When they got to the building, they noticed a large sign on the door.

“Oh, no. It’s closed!” cried Slinky.

Suddenly, a workman approached. The toys hid under a shopping cart and watched as he stepped on the black mat in front of the store. Automatic doors slid open and he walked inside.

“Hey, Joe, you’re late! We’ve got a ton of toys to unload,” called another workman from inside the store.

“All right, I’m coming,” replied Joe.

The toys glanced at each other. Buzz nodded. “All right, let’s go!” he ordered.

“But the sign says it’s closed,” said Rex. Everyone ignored him and began jumping crazily on the black doormat.

But still the doors stayed closed.

“No, no, no,” said Buzz. “All together.” Everyone paused, and then Buzz yelled, “Now!” All the toys jumped at once. When they landed on the mat, the doors whooshed open and they stepped inside.

Al’s Toy Barn was huge. Thousands of toys lined the walls, stretching into the distance. Rex was quickly distracted by a display of books at the front entrance. He giggled excitedly when he saw the cover of a video game strategy guide: Want to DEFEAT ZURG? Secrets revealed! But the other toys felt overwhelmed. “Whoa, Nellie! How are we going to find Woody in this place?” asked Slinky.

“Look for Al,” directed Buzz. “We find Al, we find Woody. Now, move out!” The toys scattered in search of Woody.

As Buzz turned a corner, he came face to face with an entire aisle of Buzz Lightyear action figure boxes. He stared in awe. “Wow.” He stepped forward to examine the toys more closely. A bright green glow captured his attention, and he noticed a special display with a sign that read NEW UTILITY BELT.

“I could use one of those,” marveled Buzz. He climbed to the top of the display case and looked around. Right in front of him was a pair of moon boots. He glanced up. Towering over him was a new Buzz Lightyear toy.

Buzz circled the New Buzz, sizing him up. The action figure stood frozen in place, unblinking. Buzz checked out his reflection in New Buzz’s shiny clear helmet. “Am I really that fat?” he wondered aloud. Then Buzz spied the figure’s utility belt and whistled in appreciation. Slowly, he reached for it.

“Ho-yahhh!” yelled New Buzz, suddenly grabbing Buzz’s arm. Swiftly, he pinned Buzz’s arm behind his back.

“Oww! What are you doing?” complained Buzz.

“You’re in direct violation of code six-four-ohfour-point-five, stating all space rangers are to be in hypersleep until awakened by authorized personnel!” barked New Buzz in a stiff, computerlike voice. He pointed toward all the other Buzz Lightyears that still stood motionless in their boxes.

“Oh, no,” said Buzz in exasperation.

New Buzz spun Buzz around, pushing him up against the display. “You’re breaking ranks, Ranger,” he said. New Buzz kicked Buzz’s legs apart and twisted his arms behind his back. Then New Buzz opened his wrist communicator. “Buzz Lightyear to Star Command. I’ve got an AWOL space ranger.”

“Tell me I wasn’t this deluded,” Buzz said, rolling his eyes.

“No back talk,” warned New Buzz. “I have a laser, and I will use it.”

“You mean the laser that’s a lightbulb?” teased Buzz as he pressed the button.

New Buzz gasped and leaped out of the way. “Has your mind been melded? You could’ve killed me, Space Ranger. Or should I say ‘Traitor’?”

Buzz broke free. “I don’t have time for this,” he said, walking away.

New Buzz raised his laser and aimed it at Buzz’s head. “Halt! I order you to halt!”

Buzz dropped from the display case to the floor. But New Buzz followed and tackled him. The two began to wrestle. Finally, New Buzz managed to shove Buzz into an empty box, using the packaging wires to secure him inside.

“Ow!” said Buzz, his voice muffled by layers of packaging. “Listen to me! You’re not really a space ranger! You’re a toy! We’re all toys! Do you hear me?”

New Buzz closed the cardboard box and placed it back on the shelf. “Well, that should hold you until the court-martial!”

“You don’t realize what you’re doing!” Buzz pleaded from the box.

Meanwhile, the rest of the toys were exploring a different aisle. Rex was still reading his Defeat Zurg strategy book, and Hamm had found a blue toy sports car. Rex, Hamm, and Slinky drove off, ramming into an occasional shelf or display.

Rex, sitting in back, continued to read from his manual. “Aaaahh! It says how you defeat Zurg! Look!” He placed the book in front of the windshield so that everyone could read. But now no one could see where they were going. The car swerved, and the toys screamed.

“Look out!” yelled Slinky. The car was headed directly for a giant box of rubber balls.

The car hit the side of the box and the balls spilled out, cascading to the ground in a blizzard of multicolored rubber. Balls bounced off everything, including the car. Everyone yelled as the car spun around wildly.

Rex’s manual flew out into the aisle. “My source of power!” he yelled, jumping out of the car and racing after the book. It slid under a shelf, lost. “No! Come back!” Then Rex looked up to see the car speeding away. “Wait up! Dinosaur overboard!” he called as he began to chase after the car.

The car swerved down the Buzz Lightyear aisle just as New Buzz turned to walk away from Buzz, now secure in his box on the shelf. The other toys pulled up to New Buzz.

“Hey, Buzz,” said Hamm.

New Buzz turned, took aim, and fired his laser at the toys. “Halt!” he shouted. “Who goes there?”

The toys were amused by what they thought was Buzz’s joke. “Buzz! I know how to defeat Zurg!” said Rex.

Suddenly, New Buzz’s attitude changed. “You do?” he asked.

“C’mon, I’ll tell you on the way,” said Rex.

The real Buzz watched from the shelf, horrified. “No, no, guys! You’ve got the wrong Buzz!”

“Say, where’d you get the cool belt, Buzz?” asked Hamm.

“Well, slotted pig, they’re standard-issue,” said New Buzz. He jumped into the car and the whole group drove away.

“Noooo!” Buzz yelled from inside the box. But no one could hear him.