Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. ~ Murphy’s Law
You’re even dumber than you think I think you are. ~ J.J. Gittes
High heels are pleasure with pain. ~ Christian Louboutin
“They were shot with a shotgun and put in garbage bags and thrown under a bridge,” Shrake said. “If it wasn’t murder, it was a really weird accident.” ~ John Sandford, Storm Prey
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt. ~ Abraham Lincoln
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. ~ Oprah Winfrey
Time passes, but sometimes it beats the shit out of you as it goes. ~ John Sandford, Easy Prey
Six days left till panhandling for coffee money. ~ Roxanna Horne
I wouldn't want to assume that all men are like you. If I did, I know I would give them up entirely. ~ Patricia Cornwell, The Body Farm
Five days till selling plasma is my full-time job. ~ Roxanna Horne
Unless you are good at guessing, it is not much use being a detective. ~ Agatha Christie
The only person who ever wanted me for who I am was the police ~ Unknown
Four days. Has anyone invented plumbing for a cardboard-box condo? Or should I just leave my towels for the next tenant? ~ Roxanna Horne
There is nothing sexier than a fireman that knows how to use his hose. ~ Unknown
I'm so horny the crack of dawn isn’t safe. ~ John Sandford, Bad Blood
Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright. ~ Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. ~ Natalie Wood
I can resist everything except temptation. ~ Oscar Wilde
In three days, I’ll be busking in McCarran Airport with a kazoo and pasties to pay for Pop Tarts. ~ Roxanna Horne
If your neighbors think you’re a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck. ~ Jeff Foxworthy
If you love something set it free, but don’t be surprised if it comes back with herpes. ~ Chuck Palahniuk, Haunted
A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down. ~ Arnold H. Glasow
I enjoy kids but not for long periods. I think they’re adorable and funny and sweet, and then I have a headache. ~ Kim Cattrall
Two days left. I can’t get my body to whip around the pole. Is it too late to learn tap dancing? ~ Roxanna Horne
Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them. ~ Dick Cavett
When crime busting is easier than your personal life, something has gone seriously wrong. ~ Laurell K. Hamilton, Bullet
I’m one day from adding tunnel-people to my resume. Living in storm-drain tunnels can’t be that bad. ~ Roxanna Horne
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about your age. ~ Lucille Ball
I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. ~ David Lee Roth
Education is learning what you didn’t even know you didn’t know. ~ Daniel J. Boorstin
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. ~ Earl Wilson
If the cops didn’t see it, I didn’t do it! ~ George Carlin
Crazy people don’t sit around wondering if they’re nuts. ~ Jake Gyllenhaal
It’s not that I'm afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens. ~ Woody Allen
No, RN does not stand for “Refreshments and Narcotics”. ~ Unknown
What the detective story is about is not murder but the restoration of order. ~ P. D. James