Acknowledgments

Thanks to Kurt Vonnegut right off the bat, for imparting the perfectly foolish notion that writing is an elegant and hilarious manner of rescue. This book was supposed to be about Vonnegut actually, a sort of Behind the Music biopic. That’s the pitch I sent the folks at Random House last spring. They wanted a book of essays instead. So it goes.

To those who read early drafts and managed to deliver the bad news with kindness—Erin, Barbara, and Richard Almond, and Keith Morris, Billy Giraldi, Dave Blair, Pat Flood, Peter Keating, Karl Iagnemma, and Holden Lewis—I offer the hallowed words of gratitude employed by my nephew Lorenzo: Spank you very much!

This spanking should and does extend to the following citizens: any editors who published this work originally, musicians who continue to make sexy music against the odds, those writers who love their characters without restraint, and the friends who continue to tolerate my panicky affections. I am especially indebted to Julia Cheiffetz and Daniel Menaker for their careful consideration of the manuscript, and irrational support.

This brings me (thank God) to my wife and daughter, without whom I would be as lonely and angry and lost as this book often suggests.

Finally, I would be remiss at this particular juncture if I failed to thank those humans who are striving, through words and deeds, to awaken this country from its false dreams of conquest and convenience. It is possible that Americans will again wage war on poverty rather than people, will choose mercy over grievance, and will adopt as their final great cause an end to the suffering we know to exist on this planet.

Or, as our pal Ann Coulter might put it, “Steve Almond is a faggot.”

Awesome.