SENALL

13 Dorie Senall was back on the Sinai, sitting in the same seat she’d sat in on the trip out to Barnard’s, but instead of flying with Dave and Forno, she now shared the ride with Terl.

After Dave and Forno left to find Heston Teska and the Memor ship, Terl had hustled her out of his compound with an urgency that surprised her. She didn’t understand his impatience, or why Forno wasn’t going along with her. She wanted to wait for him, but Terl insisted. They bickered about it, and the more heated it became, the more Terl looked to Rob, who added himself to the mix and helped Terl push her out the door.

Rob, as well as Charles—the man from the porch—took time to disguise Terl by wrapping him in heavy clothes and a dark coat with a wide hood that hid his eyes. They rushed out the door, and Rob kept a wary eye as they worked their way down the bright avenues toward the port. Citizens gave them plenty of room, keeping their distance because he was a Helk, their prejudices easy to see. They hadn’t seemed to notice who the Helk actually was.

The entire time, Dorie felt confused and detached, as if she were just a nuisance to Terl. As if she had no say in the matter. As if she were a prisoner.

The pilot was up front, also a prisoner of sorts, stuck in his bubble, presumably in possession of the proper travel visa through the slot. After pre-check and warmup, they all strapped in, and the transport left Osprey Station and hit the jump slot. She wasn’t going home to Ribon, however. She wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to return, and it saddened her. She’d come so far there, found her place, and made herself into something. Governor of New Venasaille. She’d left it behind, and she still believed she’d made the right decision, although she worried about Adi Thakur and how he was getting on handling the mess she’d left for him.

She’d found Terl. That should’ve made the sacrifice worth it. She wondered how strongly she believed that. They’d only just reconnected, but she wondered why the gap between them felt so wide. Wondered why he’d been so eager to move her out of the compound. Wondered why she had this overriding distrust—or maybe fear—of him. She wondered—

How much she still loved him.

Almost an hour after entering the jump slot, they said their first words to each other on the Sinai. Leading up to that moment, Dorie silently fumed about Terl’s treatment of her, still surprised at the suddenness of their departure.

“I want to understand,” Dorie said. She wanted to say, Why are you acting this way? but she guessed he knew what she meant.

Terl stayed silent. The tightness around his mouth was obvious, the dark leathery complexion lightening, as if he were blushing.

“Why are you so driven to face Morgan?” she asked when he didn’t answer. “Morgan and whoever his client is? Rob said you wanted to go. You’re using me to turn yourself in. One of us—either myself, Dave, or Forno—had to be available to act as your captor, and it ended up being me, as if by default.”

Dorie saw it clearly. Terl could tell Morgan that Dorie came back because the other two were convinced they weren’t needed. It’d been Morgan himself who’d given Dave the card. Morgan helping him. Telling him he had a chance to find his dad; if Morgan knew what that meant—traveling to the Ultra universe—he wouldn’t expect Dave to be the one to show up with the so-called fugitive Terl Plenko.

She couldn’t figure Morgan out. He seemed both pro-Dave and anti-Terl.

“Using you?” Terl said. “What do you mean by that?”

“It’s like I’m bait, or something.”

He chuckled. “What else is going on, Dorie? Something else bothering you? Because this doesn’t sound like you. You’ve been distant since I first saw you in the compound.”

She laughed. “That’s rich. You’re the one who’s kept distant. You think I’m distant? It’s because I’m fucking confused about your motives. I distrust you.”

“Distrust? Dorie, listen—”

“Goddamn it, Terl! I love you.” She shook her head. “I—have—loved you. Don’t you see? Am I important to you?” Do you still love me? “You’ve not said a word or asked a single question about our home since I found you. About Ribon.”

“This mission is important. I’m sorry I’ve not been thinking about Ribon.”

“You want to find out who the client is, and maybe that will be a success, but Terl, I found you. I may lose you again, and this time, it’ll be forever. I don’t want you hurt. I don’t want you gone. I want to go home. With you.”

“It’s not my intention to die. But I must be part of the Union again. I can’t do that hiding away like a frightened animal.”

He looked so tired in that moment. She saw the weight of the Union pressing down on him, and he looked like an empty shell about to be crushed. “It’ll be difficult,” she said. “It’ll be dangerous.”

“Perhaps you’ll protect me.”

She didn’t think she could, but she said, “Of course. You know I will.”

The silence returned, and not much later, Terl fell asleep. She stayed awake for a while, her eyes toward the front, watching the back of the pilot bubble. Then she slept, too.

When the Sinai exited the jump slot and queued up for Egret Station, Dorie woke to find Terl already out of his harness, staring out the window at the shimmering upper arc of Earth. Its soft, moist atmosphere, like a membrane, protected the planet from the harshness of the sun, and it breathed in and out in concert with the life below it.

Dorie imagined both her and Terl under the membrane, as if tucked in bed, comfortable and very safe, rain pattering harmlessly on the roof above them.

“Union bright,” Terl said, as he gazed at the Earth.

It was.

It was very, very bright, and maybe things would turn out okay here. She looked over his shoulder at the view, but as the pilot announced their final approach to Egret Station, she thought again of Ribon, and the dome of blue and gray that protected her home.

She longed to be under its protection.