CHAPTER 51
“Man, I got some news about yo boy Tony.”
“Can this wait, Andre? I gotta a lot of work to do,” Maxwell said, looking over a new inventory form for their new product line.
“Believe me, man, you’ll want to hear this.”
“Okay,” Maxwell said, putting the form down. “What is it?”
“I saw him last night at that new Mexican restaurant downtown, Salsa? He was on a date.”
“So? What’s new about that?”
“She was black.”
“Really? Tony’s got a little jungle fever? Well, what can you expect? He’s been hanging around us black folks for so long…”
“That ain’t all man. She was fat.”
“What?”
“Fat,” Andre said. “Real fat. Hippo fat. She was…”
“Obese?” Maxwell offered.
“Yeah. That chick was obese.”
“Man. So Tony got him a fat black girl. So that’s why he’s been actin’ so funny. What’s her name?”
“I dunno. I didn’t say anything to him.”
“You didn’t introduce yourself to her?”
“Nope. I left them alone. He was obviously ashamed of her, they were sitting in the darkest corner of the restaurant.”
“Is she pretty at least?” Maxwell asked.
“Well, if you can get past all that weight, she gotta a little Star Jones essence about her. The old Star Jones, though, not the new and improved one.”
“Say, let’s mess with him a little bit this evening. We supposed to meet him and play a little ball. We oughta figure out what’s really goin’ on with him and that fat girl.”
“Man, I was thinkin’ the same thing,” Andre said. “I can’t wait to see his face when he finds out we know about his little—nah, wait, let me take that back— his big secret.”
“You crazy man. See you later,” Maxwell said, hanging up.
* * *
“I’m tired,” Tony said, taking a long sip of Gatorade. “That’s it for me; I need to take a shower.”
“So soon? You got plans tonight?” Maxwell asked, a wicked smirk on his face.
“No, not really.”
“Man, you sure?” Andre asked.
“Dude, I think I would know if I had plans. What’s up with all the questions?”
Maxwell shrugged.
“I dunno…Thought maybe you had a date tonight or something.”
“What gave you that idea?”
Maxwell gave Andre a knowing look.
“Say, Tony, how many times you seen Jurassic Park? About twenty times?” Andre asked.
“So? It’s my favorite movie. What does that have to with—”
“And which dinosaur did you like the best? The brontosaurus?”
“I guess…”
“Is that the same one you took out the other night?”
Tony’s face darkened. “What are you talking about?”
“The dinosaur you were out with at Salsa. Although I really couldn’t see you behind her fat head, but I’m guessin’ that was you behind Mrs. Brontosaurus.”
Maxwell burst out laughing and gave Andre a high five.
“I mean, I’m not hatin’ though,” Andre added. “Hungry Hungry Hippo was my favorite game growing up.”
Without warning, Tony rushed Andre, slamming him against the wall and putting him in a chokehold.
“Don’t you ever talk about Sharon like that! YOU HEAR ME? NEVER!”
Maxwell ran to Andre’s aid and dragged Tony off him.
“What’s wrong with you?” Maxwell yelled, trying to hold Tony back from attacking Andre again.
“Yeah, man,” Andre sputtered, his voice raw. “We were just playin’!”
“Playing? That wasn’t funny!” Tony yelled, his face red.
“Get off me!” Tony screamed at Maxwell.
Maxwell let go of Tony, trying to remember the last time he had seen Tony so upset.
“Both of you guys make me SICK! So what if Sharon’s got a weight problem? So what? That’s why I didn’t tell you, because I knew you guys would freak out. None of you can say anything to me about my woman. Nothing. Andre,” Tony said, looking at Andre, his eyes cold and deadly. “Your raggedy butt can’t talk about nobody’s woman. The whole world can see what Brenda’s problem is.”
“Say man—” Andre started.
“SHUT UP!” Tony yelled, his eyes blazing. “You should have been the main person on my side, walking around with Brenda should make you respect any man that ventures past his comfort zone and actually falls in love. Especially with somebody you didn’t think you could ever be with. But you wouldn’t know anything about love, ’cause the way you talk to Brenda, its clear to everyone around you that don’t love or respect her.”
“I love her,” Andre said in small voice.
“No, you don’t. You can’t even pretend to love her. You too hung up on a girl that doesn’t even exist, a girl who don’t love you—”
“Rosslyn did love me!” Andre exploded.
“Even if she did, Andre, that was fourteen years ago! Let it go!”
Maxwell chuckled.
“And you,” Tony said, turning his attention to Maxwell, “I expected this kind of mess from Andre, but not you. But, hey, I guess your daddy is right about you. You are a coward.”
“What?”
“Did I stutter? Don’t act so surprised. You’re a coward. You so worried about what other people think, you can’t even stand up and admit you love that girl—”
“Yolanda?”
“Yeah, idiot, Yolanda! I saw the way you were looking at her at my party. You love her. You just too much of a coward to show it. But you know what? I’m not listening to you guys anymore. Especially when it comes to women. With Sharon, I’ve found everything I want and more. I’m gonna make her my wife.”
“Man, you crazy,” Andre said.
“You’re probably right. I’m crazy enough to find something in my life and go for it. That’s more than I can say for you two,” Tony said, storming off the court.
“Man, he was pissed,” Andre said, rubbing his throat.
“No joke?” Maxwell said, his voice dripping with sarcasm as he watched Tony walk away.