Arlan put the last of the trash bags in the dumpster behind the pharmacy. He pulled off his work gloves and walked to the front of the store. He’d been picking up debris and sweeping up glass from the sidewalk for hours. Since he’d swept and washed off the sidewalk, he no longer saw any signs of the shattered glass, and the spaces where the windows had been were now covered by thin sheets of plywood.
He adjusted the baseball cap Ivy had given him. She hadn’t been particularly friendly when she handed it and a T-shirt to him, but maybe that was because she’d been tasked to help other employees clean up inside the pharmacy building. After passing him the cap and shirt, she’d told him to push his bangs straight back, tuck what he could of his bowl-cut hair behind his ears, and pull the cap down low so it looked as if he had an Englisch hairstyle. Her next instruction was for him to remove his long-sleeved shirt and wear the T-shirt over his suspenders. As he sweated, the suspenders rubbed against his skin, and he felt as if he was developing blisters. But clearly she understood his need not to look Swartzentruber. How would he explain any of this to Lorraine? He flushed, wondering if she would even speak to him after such a disaster.
The other workers were loading up to leave for the day. He handed the work gloves to one of the Old Order men Lyle had hired. “Denki.”
The man tilted his head, curiosity reflecting in his eyes. Embarrassment singed Arlan’s cheeks. He’d spoken in Pennsylvania Dutch. Rather than making up an excuse for why he’d used that word, he simply smiled and prayed word didn’t get around that an Amish or Swartzentruber man had crashed a car into a store. That would be a surefire way for his parents to learn where Magda and he were. Mamm and Daed already had to be looking for them.
He walked across the street to the Martel Clinic, a trek he’d made several times today, checking on his sister. When he entered this time, the woman at the front desk pressed a button that caused a buzzer to sound, and she motioned for him to go through the door that led to the back. As he walked down the hallway toward Magda’s room, he glanced at a clock on the wall. Six o’clock already? He’d crashed the car around lunchtime. How was it already this late?
He tapped on the door.
“Kumm rei.” His sister still sounded really weak even though they’d been pumping something into her veins for hours.
He went inside Magda’s room, and she stirred on the exam bed. She rubbed her eyes as if waking.
“Bischt allrecht?” He’d asked that question every time he’d stepped into this room today. Was she all right?
“Ya.” She gave him the same one-word response each time, and then she fell asleep.
He pulled up a chair and sat next to her. The same thoughts kept circling in his brain. He’d had a plan when they left home this morning. They’d get meds for Magda and then keep driving. They could sleep in the car until he found a job that could support them while Magda got well. He’d intended to write his parents tonight and assure them they were safe and would return when the time was right. It hadn’t been an ideal plan, but it was doable and one that shouldn’t ruin his chance of moving to New York and joining that Swartzentruber community by this time next year. But now they had nowhere to go, no way for him to search for a job outside this area. They were stuck: Magda was attached to this clinic by an IV bag on a pole. But what would they do when this place closed in three hours? Their sleeping quarters had been towed somewhere.
His face flushed again at the thought of so many people working all day because of him. Because of his mess—a huge one. They were lucky to be alive. Ivy, the Amish girl who was somehow connected to Greene’s Pharmacy, had even thought he was drunk and that still nagged at him. But she had also helped.
“Arlan?” Magda stirred and tried to move her arm that was connected to the IV.
“I’m here.” He scooted his chair closer to the bed. “You’re still at the clinic.”
She pushed herself to a sitting position using her free arm. Her face held color, not much, but it was more than it had in weeks.
“You look better.” Even though he’d been allowed to see Magda whenever he came into the clinic, no one had told him how she was doing.
“Ya. I feel like I’ve had some life breathed back into me.”
“Gut.” It didn’t seem right to burden her with unnecessary information about the crash and how he’d need to spend all the money he’d saved and more to cover the cost of repairing the store. Regardless of how generous Lyle was, Arlan would pay every cent it cost to replace that storefront. But he owed more than he could pay at the moment. What on earth were they going to do now?
She fidgeted with the blanket over her. “I have something I need to tell you. You’ve risked so much to get me help, but if you knew the whole story, you might be dragging me back to Daed and Mamm.”
Shame covered her. He could see it as clearly as the prayer Kapp on her head, and he hated it for her. He had good reason to feel shame too, because he was the one who’d introduced her to Rodney. Then Arlan got busy with his own life and didn’t keep a watchful eye on his sweet, naive little sister. Maybe Rodney had the most reason to carry shame. Or maybe most of the blame fell on Arlan. “If it’s about why you’re so very sick, I know.”
Her eyes grew wide, and several moments passed before she blinked. “You know?”
“Ya. I overheard Mamm and Daed discussing it. Let’s not talk about it.” It was a very uncomfortable subject, especially with one’s sister. “I knew what I was doing when I left with you.”
A tear rolled down one of Magda’s cheeks. “But did you consider what trouble this could cause between you and Lorraine?”
“None, I hope. I’ll write to her soon, maybe tonight, and explain everything.” He wrote to Lorraine a lot. If anything was on his mind, he poured it out in letters, and then he felt better. “It wasn’t right for Daed to leave you sick like you’ve been for weeks. He’ll feel different once he calms down. In the meantime we’ll get you better. Whatever it takes—days, weeks, a month.”
“Nee!” She rattled the pole holding the IV. “That won’t be long enough. He’ll stick to his plan. I know he will.”
Arlan felt the blood drain from his face. What didn’t he know? “What is his plan, Magda?”
“To hide the pregnancy from everyone, and when the baby is born, they will take my baby as their own.”
He sat there, making himself breathe. The idea of taking the baby against Magda’s will was mean. God said parents were to be obeyed, but there was nothing in the Bible to justify their parents’ plan, was there? “You’re sure? Maybe you misunderstood.”
“Mamm explained it in detail.”
“But…” Following that plan would make them hypocrites and liars. He couldn’t believe his ears. Lending Magda a hand long enough to get her well and to let Daed rethink his plan was one thing, but staying gone too long would ruin his chance that the New York Swartzentruber bishop would allow Arlan to move there, even though he’d put good money into his brother’s farm. Arlan wanted to think through this whole thing right now and come up with a plan. But his mind wouldn’t budge from the idea of hypocrites.
He saw his Mamm’s sweet face in his mind’s eye. No wonder she’d been crying for weeks. It wasn’t just that Magda was pregnant, although that was enough on its own. It was also that Mamm would need to lie to everyone she knew for the rest of her life, including her own children. He could see how it would be done—with the extra weight Mamm carried all the time and the thick, pleated dress, no one knew when she was pregnant and when she wasn’t. “How did they intend to hide your growing belly in the months to come?”
“They would tell others they’d sent me to a cousin’s in another state, and I’d stay at the hunting cabin. When my time came, Mamm would join me.”
The hunting cabin was a half-fallen shed an hour from their home. The only source of water was a creek. He couldn’t imagine his Daed agreeing to such a plan, let alone devising it. He was a man of honor, wasn’t he?
Arlan wouldn’t mind his parents’ plan so much if Magda agreed with it and the church was aware and okay with it. Mamm and Daed raising Magda’s baby as their own made sense for several reasons. Magda could remain near her baby without the stigma of being an unwed mom. She could be courted, fall in love, and marry. Since their youngest brother was only three, it would look to others as if Mamm had simply had another baby. No one would suspect or ask if a newborn in Mamm’s arms was Magda’s.
“I…I’m so sorry.” Magda’s words broke through Arlan’s shock. She looked down as a few more tears fell, blotching the fabric of her dark-green exam gown. “I know you said you didn’t want to talk about it, but I’m so sorry.”
“Rodney’s the father?”
She nodded.
“Are you in love with him?”
“Nee. At first I enjoyed time at the shop with him. He liked my candles, and for the first time in my life I felt…special and appreciated. I’ve spent my life feeling invisible. And he made me laugh. I…I didn’t know what was happening at first, but his touch was warm, he was kind to me, and it didn’t feel wrong. I felt special, as if I mattered beyond the work I contributed. Later, when my head cleared, the guilt was horrible, and I kept begging God to forgive me. Rodney made it clear I was welcome anytime, and he hoped I’d come back the next day, but I didn’t. A few weeks later I realized I was…with child. It’s not like Mamm ever talked to me as to what caused that.”
“Did you tell Rodney about the baby?” He hated the thought, but maybe they could get financial help from Rodney to cover Magda’s medicines and the things the baby would need. But if he saw the man again, it’d be hard to resist punching him. Magda hadn’t known what was happening, but Rodney knew.
“Ya. I went back to his parents’ store and talked to him. He wants nothing to do with it. He told me to find an Englisch doctor that would, in his words, end a pregnancy. He tried to give me money to get it handled.” She wiped her cheeks. “Funny how once you see someone for who they really are, you’re never the same. What I saw in those moments still haunts me. Rodney never cared about me. But I couldn’t agree to Daed’s plan either.”
“I don’t blame you.” Arlan shifted in the chair. “Look, wrecking the car set us back, but we’re going to figure this out. You’re keeping your baby.”
“Holly said we could stay at her house when the clinic closes tonight.”
“Holly?” Was that the doctor’s name? Ivy was the name of the woman who thought he was drunk and gave him this ridiculous hat and T-shirt.
“The Old Order woman who brought me to the clinic. She works at the pharmacy. Doc Jules said that tonight I either needed to stay with Holly so she could check on me or I need to go to the hospital.”
Arlan wanted to step outside for a minute and scream at the top of his lungs. Instead he settled for a loud sigh. He didn’t like the idea of owing these people more than they already did, which was a lot. But Magda had no insurance for an overnight hospital stay. Added to that, he was unfamiliar with Englisch laws concerning minors. What if the hospital took Magda in as a patient but then had to contact their parents before they could treat her?
“I’m feeling better. Much better. We could just go. Maybe even hitch a ride toward those Englisch farms you said might have jobs for you.”
“No. We didn’t take these chances to put your health at risk. If the doc says you need to stay at Holly’s house, then we stay.”