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Carrie was sure this was going to be her year. For the first time since she’d come to Gaines University, she wouldn’t be sharing the campus with her brother. John was an amazing brother—the best she could ever want—but he could be a tad overbearing... Maybe a little more than a tad. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d spent a night with a guy, or even had a conversation with someone that wasn’t using her to get close to John. If she was interested in the guy, they usually were too terrified to have a conversation with her, fearing what her brother would do.
She was pretty sure that when she had enrolled at the college, he had a long talk with all the guys and told them that she was off limits. At first, she thought it was sort of sweet, but by the fourth time she introduced herself to someone and saw their face go completely white with fear, she was fed up. She didn’t want John to know that, though. She didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he had rendered her rendezvous with the opposite sex almost obsolete.
Now that he had graduated, she could only hope that she would have a little more freedom. A little more space to meet a few guys and make a few mistakes. What else was college for if not to make mistakes and figure out who she was?
But who was she kidding? Whenever she met a guy with any kind of potential, she always compared them to another guy—one with black hair and brown eyes that reminded her of her favorite chocolate.
Yup, she’d done the most reckless thing she could ever do. She’d fallen for her brother’s best friend.
A friend who saw her as nothing more than the little girl that used to chase him and her brother around.
David was always so sweet to her. She almost blamed him for the fact that she’d given him her heart unknowingly. Could she be held accountable when someone who looked as good as he did always treated the people around him with kindness and respect? She’d be shocked if anyone could spend more than a few minutes in his presence without falling hard for him.
That brought her to her next mission this year—her biggest one yet.
To get over David Clarke for good.
Now that she didn’t have to see him every day, she was hoping that her stupid heart would be able to forget him and find someone else to gleam onto.
Was that so hard to ask?
Her plan was simple: go out to parties with her best friend and meet guys. A frat party probably wasn’t the best place to meet her one true love, but as a junior, she didn’t feel like she had many options. Unless she decided to try the online dating route, and that thought just scared her.
At the moment, though, she was getting her dorm room ready. Since she was an upperclassman this year, she got to say goodbye to the small box that she’d called a dorm for the last few years. She and her requested roommate, Lex, were moving into a two-bedroom suite towards the top of the dorm building. They would have their own living room, a small kitchenette, and a private bathroom. It was a dream come true after having to share a bathroom with multiple girls.
She could hear Lex singing—more like yelling—from the room next to hers. She loved her like a sister, but the girl could not carry a tune to save her life.
“Alright, bitches, Omega Phi house. One hour!” The last member of their troublesome trio shouted as he walked into their dorm. Asher Ricci was truly one of a kind. During one of their first freshman courses, they had been partnered up, and Carrie had an immediate crush on him. She had thought that he might’ve been the one to draw her obsession away from David, but she found out a few weeks later that she wasn’t his type.
Asher was very gay.
He was the typical blonde-haired, blue-eyed heartthrob, and when he had told her that he also had a crush on David Clarke, she could’ve sworn that she heard her heartbreak. But even though she had to count him out as a potential rebound, he was an amazing friend. She didn’t think she could’ve gotten to where she was now if it wasn’t for him and Lex. They were two of the best friends a girl could ask for.
“No way did you just say an hour, Ricci. I’m going to need twice that amount to get ready for a night out. At least!” Lex shouted.
“Oh, please, I can’t see you and I know that you could easily walk out that door and get any guy that you wanted,” Carrie called out from her room.
Lex had beautiful, long brown hair that was a few shades darker than her own. It always had a better shine, even though they used the same products. Her brown eyes had little flecks of gold that could bring a strong man to his knees. It wasn’t fair. Lex had tried to teach Carrie her ways of ensnaring men when they were paired together in the dorms during freshman year; however, Carrie had learned early on that she couldn’t be expected to capture a guy’s attention if she wasn’t being herself.
“Like you’re one to talk,” Lex told her as Carrie joined the two of them in the living room.
“Whatever,” Carrie waved away her comment before looking at Asher and Lex questioningly. “Is that the plan for tonight?”
“Might as well get Operation Forget Clarke started,” Lex told her with a playful smirk sent her way.
They were the only two people—besides the group of girls she hung out with, that included her brother’s girlfriend—who knew of her infatuation with David. They had tried to get her to tell him how she felt, but she was always too scared to do anything. What if she told him and he didn’t feel the same way? What if he laughed at her? Or what if they tried their hand at dating, and it blew up in their faces? She couldn’t imagine spending time with him if that happened, and she enjoyed having him in her life too much to do something so stupid and reckless. She would just have to live with the daydream, and never have a chance at the real thing.
“What’s Operation Forget Clarke again?” Asher asked with a raised eyebrow.
Lex answered. “We need to get our girl under as many guys as possible to get over him. Now that a certain overbearing brother is gone, we can get our girl laid again!”
Carrie rolled her eyes. “It’s not like I haven’t gotten laid in the last few years.”
They both looked at her with raised eyebrows this time.
“When was the last time you slept with someone, and who was it?” Asher asked her in a tone that implied he knew the exact answer.
She sighed in defeat before mumbling, “Todd something-or-other, beginning of last year.”
“Exactly. If you aren’t careful, your hymen is going to grow back, and you’re going to be a virgin all over again,” Lex told her.
“That’s not going to happen,” Carrie said with rolled eyes. Still, a part of her couldn’t help but believe what her friends were saying. She was only 21 years old and already felt like an old spinster. She needed to get out and do something that other girls her age were doing. Within reason, of course.
“Of course, it’s not going to happen...because we won’t let it happen. You’re getting out there and meeting some good-looking guys,” Lex promised her.
Carrie was all on board with this plan. Hell, it had been her plan. Nonetheless, a whole flock of butterflies went off in her stomach at the thought of throwing herself at random guys. She was pretty sure that she was going to make a fool of herself.
No time like the present, right?
She sighed. “Let’s do this then.”
This would either be a huge waste of her time or the best decision she would ever make. Only time would tell. She wasn’t sure which one she was hoping for.
~~~
CARRIE PICKED OUT A cute black sequined dress that was tight in all the right places and fell off of her shoulder. Paired with high heels, which would inevitably hurt her feet by the end of the night, but made her legs look endless. She had to make some sacrifices. Lex helped her with the makeup, and by the time they were walking out the door, Carrie could barely recognize herself.
The dorms were full of people running around. Since classes were set to start that Monday, people were busy moving in and trying to make the most of the last weekend before the semester began. Carrie waved and said hi when she ran into someone that she recognized. Lex and Asher both rolled their eyes, but at this point, they were used to how friendly Carrie was.
“I swear you're worse than my mom,” Lex murmured when they finally exited the dorm building and headed towards the frat house that would be hosting the party tonight.
“I will take that as a compliment,” Carrie said lightly.
Lex rolled her eyes again, but Carrie saw the corners of her lips raise slightly as she tried to hide her smile.
The walk to the Omega Phi house was filled with laughter and chatter. They talked about the classes that they were looking forward to the most and what they did over the summer. Even though they talked over the phone multiple times and had an ongoing group text thread, Carrie loved to hear the stories straight from their mouths.
“So...what’s the game plan again for tonight?” Asher asked her when they walked through the already crowded house ten minutes later.
“Our girl here is going to get some!” Lex shouted. Carrie was glad that the students that were around them were either too drunk to care or didn’t hear her.
“Do you have to say it like that?” Carrie asked her.
“What would you like me to say? Get you a man to make sweet passionate love to?” Carrie would have to be deaf and blind to miss the sarcasm that was dripping off her every word.
“I’ll just be happy if I can get through a conversation with a guy without thinking about a certain someone,” Carrie told them.
“And we won’t leave until that happens,” Asher said. Carrie appreciated the determination, she took a deep breath as they entered the kitchen where the drinks were served.
Step one in Operation Forget Clarke was a go...
~~~
“SO, WHAT ARE YOU STUDYING?” Jacob asked her. He wasn’t the first person to ask her this question tonight, but he was the first man to ask that didn’t sound like he was checking off a box before he took her upstairs.
He was cute. He had curly blonde hair that made Carrie want to run her hands through it to see if it was as soft as she thought it would be. His eyes were a beautiful hazel color. He was the complete opposite of David, for which she was super grateful. It was fairly easy to have a conversation with him, and she hadn’t thought of David since they’d begun talking. It was a miracle.
“Psychology,” she answered him.
“That’s so cool. Are you interested in being a therapist?”
She shook her head. “I want to be a social worker.”
“That’s so interesting.” Carrie couldn’t tell if he actually thought that or was just telling her what he thought she wanted to hear. Most people that she told her after-graduation plans to never seemed to know what to say in response. It’s like they were afraid they would trigger her just by asking her more questions.
“What are you studying?” she asked in return.
“Business. I’m thinking of starting my own company.”
She raised her eyebrows. “That’s very ambitious. What kind of business are you thinking of getting into?”
He started to answer her, but she felt her phone in her back pocket vibrate, signaling a text message. Just in case it was either of her friends, she pulled it out to make sure they were okay, but felt the breath leave her lungs when she read the name of the recipient.
David Clarke.
Damn him, she thought to herself. The moment she felt like she was comfortable and slowly putting this stupid infatuation with him behind her, he popped up.
“Is everything okay?” Jacob asked her, concern written on his face.
She nodded her head and slipped her phone into her pocket without bothering to read the message, but the mood was already ruined. At least for her.
“Yeah, um, I need to go to the restroom.”
He pointed upstairs. “At the top of the stairs. First door on your right.”
She thanked him before going where he directed. Any butterflies that she had in her stomach during the conversation with Jacob died the farther she walked away from him. Trust David to unknowingly ruin her plans when he wasn’t even in the room with her.
The moment she stepped into the restroom and locked the door behind her, she pulled her phone out.
David: How’s everything going? Are you getting settled in okay?
She sighed and told herself not to respond, but her fingers were flying across the screen before she could stop them.
Carrie: It’s going well. Just hanging out with L and A right now.
His response came through quicker than she expected.
David: What kind of trouble are you getting yourself into?
Carrie: Just a party at the OP house. The usual.
Part of her hoped that he would call or text her to go home. That he didn’t like the thought of her being around other guys, drinking and partying. She would’ve been fine with any response...except the one she got.
David: Sounds like fun.
She slipped her phone back into her pocket and had to blink away the tears of rejection that were growing behind her eyes. It wasn’t like she’d put herself out there, but she still felt like he’d tossed her to the side.
It was a stupid, stupid response. She tried to tell her heart that, but the way it squeezed at the thought of David not caring told her that she still had a long way to go before she could forget her feelings.
She did her business and then rejoined the party downstairs even though a big part of her just wanted to go back to her room and eat a pint of ice cream all by herself. Though, she knew that her friends wouldn’t allow her to wallow in her own misery. At least, not for long. She told herself that she would spend another hour at the house before making an excuse to Asher and Lex. Then she would go home and eat ice cream while thinking of a man with brown eyes that took her breath away without even knowing it.
~~~
IT WAS STUPID TO TEXT her. He knew it. But did that stop him from sending that message? No. It did not.
He was out with the group—Jace, Simon, John, and their girlfriends—but he couldn’t take his mind off a certain brown-haired, brown-eyed beauty that he shouldn’t have been thinking about. Let alone thinking the kind of thoughts that he was. John would be disgusted with him if he found out exactly what David wanted to do to his best friend’s little sister. It would be the end of their friendship as he knew it.
But did that stop him from sending the text?
No. It did not.
David could remember the exact moment that he’d looked at Carrie and seen her as more than John’s little sister. He and John were freshmen at Gaines when she came to visit him. He’d been blown away. He'd known her more than half his life—as long as he’d known John—but the woman that came into their dorm room wasn’t the little girl with braces that tagged along with them in high school. This was a woman. A woman with curves. A woman that he wanted to get to know intimately.
But he couldn’t do that.
Not only would it be a breach of his friendship with John, but there was no way that a woman like her would want someone like him. He couldn’t bring himself to say anything because he knew that she would reject him, and he wasn’t sure his heart could take it.
So he resigned himself to being on the outside. He would allow himself to watch her from afar. He told himself that he wouldn’t interfere with her love life when she enrolled at the same college he was in.
That didn’t quite happen, though.
He’d seen the way some of the guys on the team looked at her when she was around. He made sure that John knew so he could put a stop to anything that they were thinking. If John wasn’t around, David made sure to let every warm-blooded male on campus know that she was off limits, and no one was allowed to touch her.
It wasn’t his proudest moment, but he also didn’t regret it.
He couldn’t touch her and he damn well didn’t want anyone else touching her either.
It killed him knowing that she was at the school all by herself, now surrounded by horny college students. The first chance she had, she would probably meet a guy and run off into the sunset with him. It pained him to think of her with someone else, but what was the alternative?
His friendship with John was too important to risk the possibility of a relationship between him and Carrie. He needed to learn to put distance between the two of them. It was probably best to start with not texting her. That was nothing but a slippery slope and he didn’t have the right equipment for it.