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David couldn’t get the dangerous thoughts that centered around a certain brown-eyed woman out of his head over the next few days. Every time he woke up, his first thoughts were of her. Every time he went to work, he wondered what she was doing, if she was still sleeping or if she was in class already. Every time he arrived back home, he would think of how she could be spending her night. He wouldn’t have been surprised if she was spending the time with another man, but just the thought of that happening made him want to find that faceless, nameless man and show him what happened when someone touched what was his. Worst of all was when he was going to sleep—he would think of her, picture her in her bed and wonder if she was thinking of him too. The possibility of that would make him so hard he would be forced to have to take care of the situation.
Needless to say, he was getting really sick of his right hand.
When the weekend arrived, part of him was tempted to go out to a bar and find a willing female—something that he had done plenty of times when he was still in college. Now, he couldn’t seem to find the willpower to do it. Whenever other paralegals flirted with him in the office, he would unwillingly compare them to Carrie, and they always came up lacking. It wouldn’t be fair to any woman for him to sleep with them while picturing another... He wouldn’t be able to look at himself in the mirror.
So his only option was to be a monk. An unenthusiastic monk.
Saturday night hit and John invited the gang back to his house for another barbecue. They were all taking advantage of the warm weather that was lasting longer than usual. He wanted to ask if Carrie would be coming, but he was worried that John would hear something unusual in his voice. He could’ve texted her, but he was trying to put some space between the two of them. It seemed like whenever he got close to her or talked to her over the phone, he ended up saying or doing something he shouldn’t.
Hopefully, if she was there and they were surrounded by their friends, he wouldn’t be tempted to touch her. He could only hope.
~~~
SHE WAS THERE.
He saw her car parked outside her brother’s house, so at least he had some time to prepare, but nothing could fully prepare him for seeing her in person. She was wearing a long-sleeved shirt that barely hinted at her cleavage, but still left him shaky, along with the tight yoga pants she had on, he was surprised that he was still standing. It was a miracle that he could walk at all.
“Hey, guys,” he called as he walked out onto the back porch. John was manning the grill while the two other guys, Simon and Jace, were tossing a football back and forth on the lawn with Christopher. The girls were sitting on the porch and, after greeting John, he went over to greet them. Carrie watched his every move, he hoped—rather selfishly—that he affected her at least half as much as she affected him. It was only fair.
“How are you ladies doing today?” he asked them. He made an effort not to look at Carrie for too long.
“We’re good. How’s the job coming along?” Taylor asked him.
“Good, good.” He was getting used to it, that’s for sure, but he knew one thing: he wasn’t going to be a divorce attorney, and the more he thought about it, the more he liked what Carrie told him. Being an adoption lawyer sounded more fulfilling. More fulfilling than dealing with pissed-off couples every day, at least. “How’s the engaged life treating you?”
She blushed as she looked down at her ring finger on her left hand. “It’s going really well.”
“That means I’m doing my job,” John said as he came over to Taylor and gave her a kiss on the top of her head. For a moment, David felt jealous of John. Not over Taylor, but the fact that he had found the love of his life, and he could be openly affectionate to her no matter who was watching.
“Have you guys set a date?” he asked them partly to distract himself from these weird thoughts that he was having.
“Not yet, but we’re thinking maybe sometime in the spring or summer. We’ll need to narrow it down in the next few weeks, though,” Taylor said as she looked back at John with an assertive glare.
“Baby, whatever you want is fine with me. Just tell me when and where, and I’ll be there with a tux,” he told her.
She rolled her eyes at him. “Who was it showing me wedding venues last night on his laptop while I was trying to sleep?”
He playfully glared at her. “What happened to ‘what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom?’”
She shook her head in response, but couldn’t hide the small smile that was lifting the corners of her mouth.
David followed John down the porch to where the guys were still playing. He was proud of himself for not looking back at Carrie (okay, maybe he looked once). After a few moments of throwing around the ball, David looked at Simon.
“So, now that this one is tying the knot, are you thinking of popping the question to Luna?”
They’d been dating for so many years that David really thought they would have been the first ones of the group to get hitched, but he’d never heard Simon mention anything.
“Dude, shut up. Ever since this asshole proposed, Luna’s been leaving hints around our place.”
John laughed, not seeming the least bit offended at the nickname. “What kind of hints?”
“Just yesterday, I found a bridal magazine under my pillow. Then, this morning before we came here, I caught her looking at her ring finger and sighing. I knew she wanted me to ask her what was wrong, but I didn’t want to open that can of worms.”
“Is there a reason that you don’t want to ask?” John asked quietly, probably just in case the girls were listening in.
“No. Trust me, that girl is it for me. Forever. But I’m not going to ask her when she’s expecting it. It’s got to be a surprise,” he told them.
“Why didn’t you ask her while we were in college?” David asked him.
“She didn’t want to get married until graduation. I have the ring and everything. I’m just waiting until she’s not expecting it and then... boom.”
“I feel like this isn’t going to work,” Jace said slowly.
“It’ll work.”
David had to give him credit. He was pretty sure of himself. Even though David also thought that this was going to blow up in his face.
~~~
“SO, HAVE YOU AND SIMON talked about marriage yet?” Taylor asked Luna when it was just the four of them. Carrie had been thinking the same thing, but she didn’t want to bring it up just in case it was a sore subject.
Luna took a sip of her drink a little sullenly before answering. “When we had been together about a year, the subject came up. I didn’t want to get married until I graduated, and he respected that, but now...”
Carrie’s heart broke for her friend who seemed to be so heartbroken over the fact that her boyfriend didn’t seem to be interested in marrying her.
“Now what?” Rory asked her gently.
“I just feel like he’s too comfortable with our relationship exactly how it is. He doesn’t seem at all inclined to take that next step. I was really expecting it after graduation, but with each month that goes by without a ring, I feel like he just doesn’t want to be tied to me that way.”
“That’s crazy. That guy is so in love with you, I can’t imagine that he doesn’t want to make you his. Officially.” Even Carrie could tell how much the two of them loved each other. It was hard to think that even someone as in love as Luna could doubt her relationship given the right circumstances.
“If he wanted to marry me then he would’ve gotten the hint by now,” Luna told them sourly.
“What have you been doing?” Rory asked her. They had been best friends since they were children, so it made sense that Rory would know Luna the best out of all the girls.
“I may have left one of your bridal magazines under his pillow the other day,” she admitted while giving Taylor a sheepish look.
“And?” Rory raised her eyebrows as she waited for the rest.
Luna sat up straight with a defensive look in her eyes. “I haven’t done anything else.” When Rory kept staring at her, she was forced to add, “On the way here, I kept sighing while looking down at my ring finger. I just wanted him to ask what was going on and then I could ask him why he hasn’t asked me yet.”
“Maybe the best way to go,” said Taylor gently, “is to just let the subject go. I don’t think any guy wants to feel like he’s being pressured into asking his girlfriend to marry him.”
Luna sighed but sat back defeatedly. “Men can be so stupid sometimes.”
“No argument here,” Rory told her.
“It’s going to be okay,” Carrie said softly. “That man loves you. Give him some time, and if it’s still bothering you, then talk to him. No good can come from all of this pent-up frustration.”
Luna gave her a thankful smile. “Thanks. You’re right. He might not be ready, and there’s no use badgering him about it. The last thing I want is an uncaring proposal.” She took another sigh, downing the rest of her drink before turning to Rory. “Now that the subject is out there... What about you?”
Rory shook her head with a laugh. “Not talking about it,” was all she said.
They tried to annoy the answer out of her, but she wouldn’t budge on her stance. Eventually, they drifted away to safer topics as they got refills, and John called out that the meat was finished.
~~~
THROUGHOUT THE REST of the night, it didn’t escape her notice that David was purposely not looking in her direction. He even chose the chair that was as far from her as possible. She was trying to replay their last conversation together in her mind to find out if she may have said something to offend him, but nothing stood out.
Maybe he’s just not that into you, she thought bitterly to herself as they were cleaning up after themselves. It was completely possible that she’d misunderstood his advances. Maybe he just needed to sleep with someone, and he thought that she was a willing body, but she couldn’t find any part of her that believed that. David wasn’t that kind of man; she knew that for sure. He would never lead a girl on.
She wanted to take him aside and ask him what was going on, but there was never a moment where she could do that without raising eyebrows. The girls already knew that she had a crush on him and that they kissed. It wouldn’t be a far reach for them if they saw the two of them talking quietly in a corner of a room.
As she said goodbye to the group, she was hoping that he would ask to walk her to her car again, but he was frustratingly silent. All she got was a head nod—a freaking head nod—before she turned around and made a straight beeline for her car. Once she was back at her dorm room, she could ask Lex for advice before falling into her bed and screaming into her pillow.
Luna said it best: “Men could be stupid sometimes.”
~~~
DAVID WAS THE LAST guy remaining at John’s house. He was helping him clean up while Taylor helped Christopher to bed.
He was really trying to get the courage to bring up a potentially triggering subject to John. He was feeling so damn nervous as he gathered up their trash and took the garbage bags to the dumpster in the alley. He almost changed his mind and put the conversation off to another day, but the thought of Carrie’s face that night, of how she looked when she so obviously wanted him to walk her to her car, he just knew that he needed to do this.
He was going to ask John if he would be fine with David asking out his little sister.
Yeah... he was a dead man walking.
When they were finished, David took a deep breath and asked John if they could talk.
“What’s going on?” John asked him with concern.
“There’s something I wanted to run by you, but I’m not sure how you’re going to react. I know what I want you to say, but...”
John pursed his lips as he listened to David ramble. “Spit it out, dude.”
So David did. “I want to ask Carrie out on a date.”
There was nothing but silence in the kitchen as the two of them stared at each other. David in fear and John in shock.
Finally, John broke the quiet. “What?”
David spoke, slower this time. “I want to date your sister.”
John’s eyebrows came together. “Why?”
David thought it was obvious, but he still spelled it out for him. “I like her, man. She’s a pretty amazing girl.”
“You’ve liked all the other girls you’ve been with. How do I know that you’re going to treat Carrie the way that she deserves?”
David shrugged his shoulders but felt like this was a losing battle. “Guess you’re just going to have to take my word on that.”
John shook his head. “Your word is not good enough. That’s my sister you’re talking about. She’s been through a lot ever since our parents died, and there’s no way that I’m going to let her get her heart broken by you.”
“I’m not going to break her heart.”
“How do you know that? David, you’re one of my best friends. I know you better than you know yourself sometimes. You’ve never once been interested in a relationship with another woman. What makes this time any different?” he asked.
“It just is. I really like her, John. There’s no way that I’m going to treat her like I’ve treated other women. She’s not like that.”
“I know that,” John told him. “Everything inside of me is screaming at me to tell you to fuck off.” Disappointment filled David’s chest. “But I also know you...” He ran his hands over his face in frustration. “I can’t just give you my approval right now. I have to protect Carrie and do what’s best for her.” That was something that David completely understood.
David was trying really hard not to take any of this personally. He was pretty sure that John would act like this to anyone that wanted to go out with Carrie. In his eyes, no one was good enough to be with her. How was he going to change his mind when John had been witness to his debauchery for the last four years? What were the words that he could say to make John see that he was serious?
That was easy... there were none.
He knew going into this conversation that it was a losing battle, but that didn’t stop the flash of disappointment and anger that coursed through his body, listening to his best friend talk about how he wasn’t good enough for his little sister.
They stared each other down for a few moments, but before either one of them could add anything, Taylor walked into the kitchen. She paused.
“Um, am I interrupting something?”
David shook his head. “No.” He stepped away from the counter he’d been leaning against and walked away. He was glad that Taylor had interrupted them because he knew that if she hadn’t, he would have said some things that he would have regretted. At least now he could walk out the door with his friendship somewhat intact.
As he slid into his truck, he couldn’t help but feel like shit. If the roles were reversed, he wouldn’t be happy with John dating his sister, but he wouldn’t have tried to stop them. John had been just as much of a playboy as David had been while they were in college, and now he was a family man through and through. What made David different in his eyes? Why did he think that David wasn’t capable of change?
The real question that he had to ask himself was this: was he going to follow John’s wishes and stay away from Carrie until John gave them his approval? Or was he going to go after what he wanted? If he went after Carrie when John had just told him no, he couldn’t see how their friendship would survive... but... if David could show John that he had really changed and that he could be the man Carrie deserved, they might have a chance to salvage their friendship.
Now, how was he going to do that?
When he got home less than ten minutes later, there were two texts on his phone. One was from John, apologizing for what he said and asking if they were still good. David replied yes before checking the other message. He felt like his heart stopped when he saw Carrie’s name light up on his screen.
Carrie: Is everything okay? I just wanted to make sure that we’re good.
He was typing out a message to her when he froze. He stared at her picture that he had saved on his phone, and longing filled his chest. A longing that was so strong that all he wanted to do was see her and hold her in his arms.
Fuck it, he thought as he put his truck back into drive and pulled out of his parking spot. There was no way that this could end well, but when was he known for doing what was right? Doing the wrong thing just felt too good.
He just had to hope that Carrie felt the same way.