Chapter Sixteen

A few days later, Caleb pulled to a stop outside of a house in Waterbury that looked like one of those that Zara usually drove by and wondered how long it took to vacuum the entire place. It was two stories with a three-car garage and a circular driveway protected by a gate that needed a code. She inhaled a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Why had she agreed to go to an Ice Knights team barbecue at Cole Phillips’s house? It wasn’t like they were in a relationship. She didn’t need to meet his friends, but it had seemed like a good idea when he’d shown up at her place this morning with a spur-of-the-moment invitation.

Now? Her stomach flopped around inside her like a fish out of water. Everyone at the barbecue would tower over her, even though she’d put on her I-am-a-badass super-high heels today. The athletes and their model girlfriends would take one look at her with her bright-red hair, gargantuan number of freckles, and clearance-rack clothes before dismissing her.

She was gonna have a panic attack right here in Caleb’s truck as he parked next to a sports car glossed to a high sheen.

“This isn’t a date, right?” she asked for the billionth time since he made her come again this morning and she was so high on happy hormones that she agreed to come. “So if your friends hate me, it doesn’t matter.”

“No, it’s not an official date; it’s a hangout. The Bramble people don’t need to know a thing about it,” Caleb said. “And if my friends hate you, we’re just gonna throw them in the pool.”

“There’s a pool?” Dumb question, girl. It’s a McMansion behind a security gate. Of course there is a pool.

He squeezed her hand with his much bigger one. “They’re good guys; they’re gonna love you.”

Nerves still making her stomach burble, she arranged her face into what she hoped was a not-a-complete-weirdo smile and got out of the truck. Caleb knocked on the front door but didn’t wait for an answer before walking inside. They headed through the house with its rich mahogany hardwood floors and modern furniture that looked like it came out of a spread in Interior Design magazine and toward the kitchen, where all the noise seemed to be coming from.

“Is your place like this?” Because compared to her studio apartment, this was Texas, and she wasn’t sure how to deal with that difference.

Of course, you don’t have to worry about it, since you’re not dating him for real. She mentally smacked herself for that unnecessary bit of reality. The voice in her head could be a real asshole sometimes.

“It’s not as clean. Phillips is a neat freak,” Caleb said, stopping in the hall before they turned into the kitchen. “You’ll have to come over this week. Maybe after the next home game?”

She looked up at the high ceilings and around at the hallway wide enough for one of those kid-driven cars. “I’d be afraid of getting lost in all this space.”

“Just for you, I’ll block off the west wing and east tower,” he said, pulling her closer.

“You’re such a smart-ass.” She punctuated the declaration by lifting herself up onto her tiptoes and kissing him before he could make another rejoinder.

It worked. He dropped one hand to her hips, pulling her close and deepening the kiss. She was just wrapping her arms around his neck when someone cleared his throat behind them.

Because of course—of course—she’d meet someone after he walked in on her making out with her not-date the first time she was invited inside. Way to make a great first impression. She turned around, but Caleb didn’t didn’t remove his reassuring touch.

“About time you showed up, Stuckey,” the guy said. “Tell me you brought the brats.”

Caleb lifted the bag in his hand that wasn’t still planted firmly on her hip. “Ta-da.”

“Thank God.” He snagged the bag. “I get one of these cheat days a month, and I’m making it count.”

“Zara Ambrose, meet Cole Phillips, who, despite his obsession with dusting and insistence that everyone use a coaster, is actually a pretty chill dude,” Caleb said. “Phillips, this is Zara. She is a massively talented miniatures artisan and you don’t stand a chance with her because she has a Great Dane.”

Cole grimaced. “Oh God, the only thing worse than dogs is kids. Sorry, I’m sure your dog is the special one that doesn’t shed or lick things.”

“Oh no, Anchovy does all of that, plus he steals and farts.” She cringed as soon as the words were out of her mouth.

Cole, who looked like he worked as a model during the off-season, just stared blankly at her for a second. Yes, there she was, continuing to make the world’s worst first impression. Then, when she was ready to chop through the hardwood floor to make her own hole to crawl into, Cole started laughing, and she let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.

“You are always welcome. Your dog, not so much,” Cole said. “Come on out by the pool. The grill is ready to go, and Petrov and Christensen are playing some kind of ping-pong death match.”

They followed Cole out onto the patio. While she’d been expecting a crush of people, there was only about a dozen. Most were Ice Knights players, including Zach Blackburn and Fallon Hartigan, who she, like most of Harbor City, had watched fall in love. She had been firmly #TeamZuck, and meeting them now was a little awkward. Okay, a lot awkward. She may have called Fallon Lady Luck, which really was better than referring to Zach by his former nickname as the most hated man in Harbor City…but still embarrassing.

Two strikes, Ambrose.

“Don’t even stress about it,” Fallon said when Zach and Caleb wandered off to go get cheeseburgers and beers for them all. “Meeting everyone can be weird. I met everyone at a paintball game and was so excited, I told Stuckey his own stats.”

“Thanks,” she said, relieved at the other woman’s kindness. “That’s really nice of you.”

“Just don’t let it get out.” Fallon gave her an ornery grin, nodding toward the two guys who’d been playing ping-pong and who were now making their way over. “I have a reputation as a ballbuster to uphold.”

“I’ll never tell,” Zara said with a laugh as the men stopped at their table and sat down with them.

“Oh, come on, you can tell me everything.” One of the men stuck his hand out. “Alex Christensen. You must be Zara, the woman who has our boy all twisted up six ways from Sunday.”

God, how did she explain the straightforward plan she and Caleb had come up with that had twisted into a complicated mess all of a sudden? “It’s not like that.”

“The Bramble dates are a PR setup? Yeah, I figured that,” the other man said, lifting his chin in greeting. “Ian Petrov.”

“Oh, you’re Petrov,” she said, excited to have a face to put with the name. “Caleb was telling me all about how they were going to trade you if he didn’t do the dating thing. I’m so glad everything worked out.”

The words were out of her mouth in a burst of nervous rambling, and as soon as they were, she knew she’d fucked up.

Ian leaned forward, his eyes narrowing and his shoulders tensing. “Trade me?”

Strike three, you’re out, Ambrose. You have officially messed up everything within the first ten minutes of being here. Way to go.

She gulped. “I guess I forgot you didn’t know that part?”

“No,” Ian said in a harsh voice. “Stuckey seems to have forgotten all about telling me that very vital piece of information about my career.”

Of course, Caleb walked back to their table with two plates of cheeseburgers at that moment. Zara wanted to warn him, but she didn’t get a chance.

“So it seems I have you to thank for my job.” But Ian didn’t sound thankful—not in the least little bit—as he stood up and faced off with Caleb. “Here I’d thought I was back in the lineup because of all that hard work I’d put in at the gym and the PT regimen that left me praying for death some days. I gave up motherfucking cookies because I didn’t want to leave anything to chance.”

Fallon leaned over and whispered, “He loves cookies, like could-be-Santa-Claus loves them.”

Caleb didn’t seem put out by the other man’s aggressive attitude. He just sighed and rolled his eyes.

“And this is why I didn’t say anything to you.” Caleb laid the paper plates ladened with enough food for five on the table. “You and that big-ass chip on your shoulder because of your last name. You got your spot back all by yourself, not because of me and not because your dad’s in the Hall of Fame. You put in the work; I just made sure you had the time to make it happen.”

The two men were practically nose to nose, chests puffed up, both of them refusing to back down. Zara opened her mouth to say something—anything—in way of an apology for causing trouble, but Fallon reached out and covered her hand, giving her a discreet nah-don’t-do-it shake of her head and mouthing the word “men” while rolling her eyes.

“I made it happen on my own,” Ian said. “They aren’t trading me.”

“Yeah, I know. They told me last week before they gave me the A.” Smiling, Caleb slapped his hand down on the other man’s shoulder. “The front office wants to have your damn babies now—especially after that game against Detroit. They’re looking at you like the glue this team was missing last season.”

The vein in Ian’s temple pulsed, and his jaw was clamped shut so tightly, she worried a dentist would need to get called in to fix his teeth, but after a few tense seconds, he relaxed. “Next time, don’t think you can fly in and fix things without telling people first. You are always pulling that shit.”

“You are,” Phillips said, sitting down at the table as if it hadn’t just been World War III. “Even with that stupid video, you took the heat on your own. You’re not alone out there, you know. We can help you, too.”

“Jesus,” Zach grumbled, popping open two beers and handing one to Fallon. “Are you gonna sit here and talk about your feelings the whole afternoon? Because you are ruining my appetite.”

“Always the charmer,” Fallon said, shaking her head.

He winked at his girlfriend. “Only for you.”

All the tension in the air around them disappeared as Zach and Fallon started eating their cheeseburgers as if Ian and Caleb hadn’t just almost come to blows. Everyone else seemed to treat the moment that way, too, walking off to grab a beer or a burger. Finally, Caleb sat down and picked up a burger from one of the overloaded plates, then pushed the plate to her.

“Sorry about that,” she said, wondering how in the world she was going to make it up to him. “I forgot that he didn’t know.”

“I should have told him, let him in from the beginning.” Caleb shrugged and took a bite. “I guess I’m more like my mom than I realized. She’s always pulling this crap where she thinks she knows what’s best for someone and just does it without even asking first.”

“Kinda like suggesting the Bramble stunt to Lucy?” Fallon asked.

Zara’s chin almost hit the table. Caleb must have been just as shocked because for once, he didn’t have a response. He just stared at Fallon, his eyes wide.

“Why are you so shocked?” Zach asked. “You said yourself that your mom is known for her behind-the-scenes planning and play-making.”

“I can’t believe it,” Zara said, thinking back on her interactions with Britany to see if there had been any hint, any clue that she’d missed.

Caleb threw back his head and laughed. “I can. As she always says, you don’t get to be at the top of your game by playing it soft.” He turned to Zara, heat in his eyes. “You gotta fight to make it happen.”

Her breath caught, and a million words swirled around in her head, all of them a bad idea when it came to keeping her heart in one piece. The truth of it was that it was already too late. Maybe not in reality, but her heart had broken rule number one, and she had no idea what to do about it.

Before she could accidentally voice any of that, though, Ian, Cole, and Alex grabbed Caleb’s chair, carried it over to the deep end, and dumped him—burger and all—into the water. They may have been pranking Caleb, but she couldn’t help but think they’d just saved her from saying something she was bound to regret.

It was, after all, rule number one: five dates and done.

…

On the day sandwiched between the team barbecue and their final preseason road trip out west, Caleb had one thing on his mind—seeing Zara. They’d been able to FaceTime a few minutes here and there, but nothing like before. She’d been working all hours to finish up her miniatures scene for the Friends of the Library silent auction during the organization’s ball in a few days. Meanwhile, he’d been spending more time in the sin bin than Coach Peppers liked after a few players got chippy with him and brought Zara into the on-ice discussion.

But today? Today he was taking the steps up to her apartment two at a time to get to her door just a few seconds sooner. He made it to her floor, and his phone vibrated. Since he had a meeting scheduled in a little bit with Lucy, he couldn’t ignore it.

The notification, though, wasn’t from her. It was from the Bramble app. The app’s icon now had a big red circle with the number four inside it, notifying him of how many days it had been since his first reminder to schedule date number five. He’d been ignoring the notifications, a practice he had no plans to change.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t sure how much longer he’d be able to, because the Bramble people were calling Lucy and Lucy was calling him and the whole world wanted this PR stunt wrapped up by the first game of the regular season—except for him. And that’s why he was outside of Zara’s apartment, knocking on the door instead of using the app to officially schedule their final date.

“Hey there,” she said, using her entire body to keep an excitedly wiggling Anchovy from bursting out into the hall.

She looked delectable. Her hair was up in a big poof on top of her head, and she had on a pair of yoga pants and an Ice Knights sweatshirt that he’d never seen her in before. If it was his number, he wasn’t going to remember his promise to himself to play it cool. There was just— She turned around to shush Anchovy, and he saw the number. It was his.

Something came over him and he swept her up, pulling the door closed behind her to block Anchovy inside, and gave in to the overwhelming need to kiss her until she forgot everything else but him. He cupped her ass as she wrapped her legs around his waist and he was lost in the feel of her. Damn. He was so screwed, but as long as he was kissing her, he didn’t give two shits. Unfortunately, though, he’d acted before his brain had caught up, and they were definitely on the wrong side of her front door for him to get to do all the things he wanted to.

He broke the kiss but didn’t let her down.

“I was in the neighborhood for a meeting and thought you might have some time to go grab coffee,” he said at the same time as the dog let out a sad wail on the other side of the door. “We could take Anchovy.”

She didn’t hesitate. “Let me grab his leash.”

He didn’t want to let her go but did anyway, staying out in the hall because he didn’t trust himself not to strip her down the second they were alone. So he watched as she hurried around the apartment, slipping on her shoes and then putting her tools away. The dollhouse she’d been working on for weeks with all the authors reading one another’s books looked finished, and it was amazing. He wanted to take a closer look but again, he’d get her naked and have her coming on his lips instead of making his can’t-miss appointment with Lucy.

Zara grabbed her keys while Anchovy went to a basket by the door and pulled out a leash. He snapped it onto the dog’s collar, and the three of them walked down the stairs. If anyone had asked if he’d taken Zara’s hand or if she’d grabbed his, he couldn’t have answered. All he knew was that by the time they walked out into the afternoon sunshine, their feet crunching on the first fallen leaves of the season, they were holding hands.

They went to a walk-through coffee joint a few blocks down from her place and a few blocks up from the Carlyle Building. He told her about the extra-hot hot sauce they’d gotten a rookie to drink in Atlanta, and she told him about the rush order she’d gotten for thirty-six miniature antelopes. They were laughing trying to come up with the most ridiculous miniature scene they could think up that would require that many antelopes when they turned the corner to the Carlyle Building and nearly ran right into Lucy.

“Oh, just look at this good boy! You’re a good boy, aren’t you?” Lucy asked, turning into a nearly unrecognizable softie in the presence of Anchovy, squatting down and giving the dog the kind of attention he clearly thought he deserved. “I don’t know what you did this time, Stuckey, but if you always bring this boy over to my office, I will find a way to fix it.”

“I didn’t do anything,” he said. “We had an appointment.”

Lucy turned her attention from him to Zara, giving her an assessing once-over. “Are you going to introduce me to the woman who saved your ass?”

Caleb rolled his eyes. “Zara, meet Lucy Kavanagh, the most sought-after crisis management public relations person in Harbor City. Lucy, meet Zara, who not only saved my ass but happens to own Anchovy.”

“Nice to meet you. Have you worked in this building long?” Zara asked. “It’s my favorite one in the city.”

“A few years,” Lucy said, looking at the skyscraper that seemed to reach up and touch the sky. “The Carlyles are big Ice Knights fans, and when the office came open, I was able to sweet-talk my way into a lease.

“But I’m guessing you two aren’t here to talk buildings,” Lucy said. “We have Bramble business. Zara, are you coming up, too?”

“No, Caleb just rescued me from my workaholic ways long enough to grab a walk and some coffee,” Zara said with a laugh. “And this is probably presumptuous, but have you ever met Helen Carlyle?”

Lucy shook her head and gave Anchovy a scratch under the chin. “Usually people want to know about her sons, Hudson and Sawyer, but no, I haven’t met her.”

“Too bad. I was hoping for some insight.” Zara looked up at him, an embarrassed flush making her cheeks pink. “She’ll be at the charity ball I’m going to next week and she’s a huge miniatures collector. I was hoping to be able to make a connection so I wouldn’t make a bunch of conversational fumbles like I did at the barbecue.”

He squeezed her hand and ran his thumb across her knuckles to reassure her, but there was no missing the worry in the tightness around her mouth. With the ball coming up, he knew her stress level had to be at a peak. She wasn’t one who ever seemed to want to let herself dream—and he couldn’t blame her after she’d told him about all of her dad’s schemes.

“Sorry I couldn’t be of help.” Lucy gave Anchovy one last pat on his head and stood.

“No worries,” Zara said. “Well, I know you two have a lot to talk about and I have a piece to finish.” She turned to Caleb. “Talk to you later?”

Their schedules had been at odds lately, and he was hitting the road tonight for a four-day west coast trip, but he’d always have time for her. Lifting her hand, he kissed the trio of freckles on the inside of her wrist. “Without a doubt.”

…

“So what happened after that?” Gemma asked the next morning as she ate a bite of double-caffeinated, triple-chocolate doughnut with rainbow sprinkles. “He just went up into the building? He didn’t carry you away on his horse into the sunset? He didn’t even kiss you properly, only on your wrist like a rakish Regency duke?”

Zara almost choked on her sea salt and caramel doughnut with coconut flakes. “Oh my God, warn a person before you say something so ridiculous! He’s not my boyfriend. It’s just a mutually beneficial partnership with one date left to go.”

She looked around at the other customers at the Donut Emporium on Sixty-Eighth Street who were all noshing on Harbor City’s best carb and sugar concoctions. No one paid them any mind.

It was a Saturday-morning tradition to meet Gemma and do some carb loading for the definitely-not-doing-a-marathon activities ahead of them. It was also the best time to catch up on everything they’d been missing. Between Gemma doing all her wedding planning and Zara working her ass off to finish her latest piece before the ball—not to mention going out on as many dates and non-dates with Caleb as possible—it had been hard to get together with her best friend. So this morning she’d pushed aside the unusual disappointment at waking up in a bed by herself—unless she counted Anchovy snoring beside her, which she did not—and had leashed the Great Dane. They’d walked the four blocks to one of the best outdoor eating spots in her neighborhood, where all dogs were welcome as long as they stayed on the outside of a short iron fence that surrounded the tables.

“Okay, fine.” Gemma took a sip of her hot tea, the steam floating up into the air of the first crisp fall morning of the season. “He can carry you off into the sunset on the Ice Knights’ Zamboni.”

“Not everyone gets a happily ever after.” Unease settled into Zara’s belly, turning the coconut flakes and sugary goodness into something acidic and foul, which pretty much made her the worst friend ever, considering she was sitting across from her best friend who was only a few months away from wedded bliss. “I mean, you do, obviously, because you and Hank are perfect for each other.”

“You don’t think there’s anyone perfect for you?” Gemma asked.

“I have to be realistic.” Zara reached over and gave Anchovy a few pets on the top of his head, his smooth fur settling her nerves. “I’m happy with a couple of orgasms and a good time.” Her fingers trembled, so she wrapped them firmly around her paper cup, letting its heat seep into her. “Isn’t that what the whole point of this Bramble date thing was? To clear out the cobwebs, not find forever.” She took in a deep breath, willing that stupid clock that always seemed to be ticking away in her subconscious to shut the hell up. She was getting exactly what she wanted and she was thrilled. Her throat burned, but she was determined to get the last bit out. “Well, I’m happy to report that they’re gone.”

Gemma raised an eyebrow. “So why do you sound like you’re about to cry?”

“I don’t cry. It’s allergies.” She wrinkled her tingly nose, blinking extra-hard to clear out the pollen that must have come out of nowhere. “And I’ll have you know that I don’t expect some knight in shining armor or Prince Charming to come rescue me from my life. I like my job. I have a goal I’m working toward.” She shoved a bite of doughnut into her mouth with more effort than necessary, part of it crumbling in her fingers. “Things were going well before Caleb Stuckey and they’ll go well after date five.”

“Which is why you’ve made sure to schedule that last date,” Gemma said, nodding as if Zara’s explanation made perfect sense while her eyes all but screamed that her pants were on fire.

Date five? She had six notifications from Bramble to schedule it. She’d ignored every single one like it was a dirty plate someone else had put in the sink instead of the dishwasher—resentfully and often.

“We’ve been busy.” No, that didn’t sound lame at all.

Gemma scoffed, dropping any pretense at believing any of the bullshit was real. “Why can’t you just admit that you really like him? That you finally found someone who you feel safe with? Who you aren’t going to have to worry will spring life-changing surprises on you in an effort to change the world in one fell swoop? Are you afraid it’ll just make all of this too real?”

“It’s not that.” It’s totally that, you big liar. “I mean, look at my history. It’s been one undependable guy after another in my life, from my dad and his crazy schemes to every boyfriend I’ve had.” Fear and panic and worry and a million other emotions went to battle inside her, leaving her bleeding and aching and wondering if she could survive this. “Is it really smart for me to fall for a guy who travels ten months out of the year? One who only dated me because his mom picked me out of a digital lineup? One who lives by the philosophy of going with his gut instead of solid, hardcore planning? What about any of that sounds like it could be forever?”

“You gotta let yourself believe.” Gemma reached across the table and laid her hands on top of Zara’s, giving her a gentle squeeze. “Have a little faith that something good can happen.”

But would it? The idea of answering yes was nearly overwhelming, leaving her lungs tight with anticipation and an elusive hope that began to feel a little more real with each day she spent with Caleb.