| |
“JESUS,” BLACKWELL SAID to Alex after the six of us stepped into an elevator and began our ascent to the fortieth floor. “‘Defined by his honesty and his morality.’ Well played, my dear. You just set that son of a bitch up.”
“Actually, he did that to himself,” Alex said. “He just didn’t know it at the time. Now, Tank will gather his team and go to work. Finding Janice Jones is critical, but so is questioning people who might have seen them together and who will be willing to go on record if they saw anything inappropriate between them. The sooner this is behind us, the better.” He looked over at Tank, who was standing behind Lisa. Ann was to their right, beside Blackwell and me. “Agreed?”
“Agreed,” Tank said. “But I am going to caution you—Rowe knows exactly what you did back there.”
“Of course he does. Did you see the look he gave me when we entered the building? I’d be dead right now if I’d taken it to heart. He’s furious.”
“That’s what concerns me.”
“You think I need protection?”
“I do. And so does Jennifer. Just as a precaution.”
“That’s fine. You’ll be busy, so I assume you’ll hire someone to oversee us?”
“I already have two men in mind.”
“For now, you’re only going to need one.”
Tank furrowed his brow. “Why’s that?”
“Because Jennifer and I are getting out of here.”
I looked at him. “We are?”
“We are. I’m taking you to our cottage in Maine. It’s time for us to be alone together. Just you and me. Since Wenn is in such great hands, I want to spend some time with my wife.” He looked at Blackwell. “You also should take some time off. A week. Spend it with the girls. Forget about Wenn.”
“What about Tank?” she asked.
Alex looked at his friend. “I’ll make it up to you,” he said. “But right now, I need you on this. Are you all right with that?”
“I’m ready to go.”
“Lisa, are you OK with Tank working while the rest of us take some time for ourselves?”
“I have no problem with it if he doesn’t.”
“But you’ll be alone most of the time,” I said with concern.
“No, I won’t. I’ll have my zombie peeps to keep me company. And besides, I’m two weeks behind on my book. This girl also needs to get to work—and fast—or I’m going to miss my deadline, and Iris won’t have that. No rest for the undead, so to speak. If that even makes sense.”
Alex turned to Ann. “I know you’re out of the loop on all of this and probably are wondering what the hell is going down between Rowe and me, but Barbara will debrief you on everything before you leave for the day.” He glanced over at Blackwell. “Would you do that? Tell her everything?”
“It would be my pleasure to tell Ann everything she needs to know about that hooligan.”
“When are you planning on leaving?” Tank asked.
“Jennifer needs to see her gynecologist today—she plans on calling the doctor as soon as we get to my office and making that happen, regardless of how busy the woman is. If Jennifer is in good health, we’ll take one of the Lears in the morning and spend a week on the coast. It should be beautiful there now. I’ll call you tonight and let you know when your man can meet us at the airport. Sound good?”
“No problem.”
The elevator started to slow.
“I need you to find her, Tank,” Alex said.
“I know you do, Alex. And I will.”
“I want Rowe out of Wenn as soon as possible. Call me in Maine if anything comes up—big or small. If you find Jones quickly, Jennifer and I will be back on the plane and in New York before you know it so we can shut this down for good.”
“You’ve got it.”
When the elevator doors slid open, I suddenly and unexpectedly found myself saying goodbye to my friends. I hugged Blackwell, Lisa, and Ann, and I gave Tank a kiss on the cheek before joining Alex in the hallway. He reached for my free hand, and we started for his office.
“This is a surprise,” I said.
“We need time alone together,” he said. “I’ve missed you.”
“But don’t you need to be here for Tank?”
“Tank doesn’t need me. He’ll find Jones on his own, and knowing him, he’ll find her fast. So fast, in fact, that we may only get the weekend together, but at least that’s something. At least it will be just you and me. I plan on taking in every minute of it.”
We stepped into his office, he closed the door behind us, and I could see by the heat in his eyes that he wanted me. He placed the palm of his hand against the side of my cheek, told me that he loved me, and then leaned in and kissed me on the lips. At first, the kiss was gentle, but then it became searing, a kiss filled with lust and longing, and I gave myself over to it because I also had missed us like this.
I could smell a trace of his cologne, and I found it as intoxicating as him. Slowly, carefully, he moved me backward until my back was pressed against the wall. Our tongues met again, but because my arm was held in front of me in its sling, our torsos could only barely touch one another, which seemed almost cruel to me. As we continued to kiss, the fact that our bodies couldn’t fully embrace only intensified the moment. Because of my injury, we were being cheated of truly letting go and becoming one.
“I want to make love to you,” he said.
“I want the same thing.”
“Are you ready?” he said. “Emotionally?”
I didn’t want to talk about our loss—we’d already done that. I needed to trust that soon we’d have children, several children, whom we would welcome into our lives. It had been so long since Alex and I had shared any kind of intimacy, I knew that if we didn’t become close again and reclaim the fire that had once defined us, that it would be a death in and of itself. “Don’t you see?” I said. “The very act of making love to you is exactly what I need. I want to be naked in your arms. I want to become one with you again. I need you inside of me. I’m craving it now.”
“You are?”
“You don’t even know.”
He seemed almost relieved by the admission, perhaps because he himself knew that our lives could have turned another way if we hadn’t accepted the miscarriage.
“All right,” he said. “But first we need to get you to your doctor. Do you agree? Yes? She needs to check you out. When that’s over, then we’ll leave for Maine—which, by the way, is where we first made love.”
“You think I’ve forgotten? You were my first. You’ll always be my first. And you’ll forever be my last, Alex. So take me to Maine again. There, we’ll be one again. It’s time to move forward. And you’re right. It’s also time to see my doctor to make sure I’m in good health so we can take that next step. Let me call her now—she’ll see me.”
And she did.
Later, at my appointment, I learned that, while I may have miscarried, I was physically fine. Better yet, the doctor was encouraging. As far as she was concerned, despite all that we’d been through, I was healthy—and there was every reason to believe that at some point, when we were ready to welcome a child into our lives, we could have one.
“It’s really up to you,” she said. “Though I would caution you on this—take some time for yourselves. Absorb the loss as best you can. And when you arrive at the moment when it feels right to get pregnant again, do it. Because I can tell you this—there’s nothing wrong with you, Jennifer. As far as I’m concerned, you can conceive whenever you want to.”
