“Is she doing any better?”
“Not really. She’s still not talking, but at least she’s out of the bed.”
“She’s been staring out that window for hours, Caleb. It’s been days since she’s had something to drink, something to eat.”
“Don’t you think I know that? What do you want me to do? I’ve tried everything. I-I don’t know if she’s….” He stopped mid-sentence, squeezing his eyes shut. “I can’t lose her.”
“Look, you need to rest. Take a break. I’ll stay with her, I promise.”
“And what about the lady from the market? Leola…something or other. What did she say?”
“Rest first, and then we will—”
“No. You tell me right now. What did she say?”
“She said there was nothing anyone could do. That it’s up to Azrael to decide whether she wants to come back.”
“Then let’s make her want to.”
~*~
She could hear them, hear how worried they were. Once or twice she’d tried to speak, but nothing came out. Azrael remembered being inside the veil, not knowing who she was, why she was there. When she’d come to, Lance and Caleb were standing over her. That’s when it all came rushing back in.
In the veil, there was no pain. No expectations. No worries. Just her and darkness. Now she was back, in a world of fear, of uncertainty. She didn’t want to let go of that small sense of peace she’d found before one of the creatures came, forcing her back. A strong set of arms slid around her waist, lifting her into the air before laying her on the bed. Lance lay down beside her. He lifted a finger, lightly tracing her jaw.
“Please come back to us, Azrael.”
Blue eyes sought hers. Azrael stared, unblinking. She’d never noticed how many shades of blue his eyes held. There were flecks of turquoise and cornflower. His lashes were long, midnight black. She wanted to lift her hand, to run her fingers across the dark shadows under his eyes, but she was too tired.
“Caleb would be a mess without you. He needs you. Who will take care of him if you don’t come back?” Lance cupped her hand in his. “It’s not just him, though. I need you too. I know it’s crazy, and I know you want to leave. I—I just…if nothing else, I need to know you are alive, that you’re happy, even if I never see you again. Please, Azrael.”
Something stirred inside of her. She flinched her hand in an attempt to squeeze his.
Lance took a sharp breath. “That’s it. Come on back. Keep fighting.” He ran his fingers through her hair, over her lips and face. “Come on, baby.” His eyes were wild, frantic, hands all over her body, massaging warmth into her limbs.
She gasped.
“That’s it,” he whispered, trailing gentle kisses on her earlobe.
She turned her head, meeting his lips. The kiss was slow and sweet. A slow-moving heat filled her, starting in her lips and curling her toes. Lance’s mouth lingered on hers for a moment longer before pulling away.
“Hey there.”
“Hey,” she whispered, her voice raspy.
“Welcome back,” he said, a smile on his face, thumb still caressing her cheek.
“How…?” Azrael swallowed. “How long was I gone?”
“Summoning? Maybe an hour. Afterwards?” Lance bit his lip. “It’s been two days. We were scared you would never come back. It was like you were comatose.”
“I—I think I was in a way. I remember bits and pieces, but it’s blurry. Like I was looking through a stained-glass window.”
“What happened in there? Leolacent came by. She said you’d stayed in the veil too long, that your mind was lost.”
Azrael closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath. She tried to speak, but her bottom lip trembled, and she bit it to stop the shaking.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay. We don’t need to talk about it right now. It’s enough that you’re back. Caleb’s going to be ecstatic. How about we get some food down you? I bet you’re starving.”
His statement caused her stomach to growl, reminding her of human needs she’d been ignoring for days. Although hungry, she felt the need to wash first, to be clean. “Can I bathe first?”
Lance frowned. For a moment, he looked like he would deny her something as simple as a bath. Then he gave her a gentle smile. “Sure, but I’d rather you not be alone. To be honest, I’m a little worried you might slip away again.”
“I won’t.”
“Humor me.”
~*~
“Thanks, Caleb,” she said, leaning back and closing her eyes as he blow dried her hair.
“I’m just glad you’re okay. You scared the crap out of me.” Caleb grabbed the round brush and ran it through her tangles. “You are never allowed to do that to me again, or I’ll have to kill you.”
“Threat duly noted.”
Azrael pulled the cotton robe tighter around her. Not even the hot air blowing from the dryer could dispel the cold fingers of fear running through her veins. She shivered. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Caleb glance in the mirror. She didn’t have to look up to know Lance was standing in the doorway, that the two of them were passing concerned glances at each other. They’d been doing that since she’d come to. Neither asked her about what happened during the summoning, but she knew they were worried.
“Feeling better?” Lance asked, coming into the bathroom to stand beside her.
“Yeah, a bit.”
“Good.” He placed his hand on hers. “I made soup and sandwiches. I thought we could eat in the living room by the fireplace.”
“That sounds good,” she replied.
Lance turned and exited, leaving her confused. She didn’t know what to think about his sudden change in attitude. Instead of hot and cold, he’d been treating her with an unexpected tenderness. And that kiss….
Azrael touched her lips.
Caleb stopped brushing her hair. “He was worried about you.”
“That’s nice for a change.”
“I know you don’t want to hear this, but maybe you should give him a chance, give the two of you a chance.”
“You know that’s not possible.” She swiveled in her chair. “I thought you didn’t like him anyway. What changed your mind?”
“I saw the look on his face when you flew out of that circle when we thought you were dead. I watched him fuss over you night and day. Maybe I gained a new perspective. He cares for you,” Caleb said, turning on the dryer to finish her hair.
“He just needs me alive to summon Blaise.”
“No, that’s not it.” Caleb shook his head. “He…I don’t know. He seemed pretty torn up. We took turns watching over you. When he didn’t know I was there, he’d whisper things I think he was too scared to tell you when you were awake.”
“What kind of things?” Azrael asked.
“You’ll have to ask him,” Caleb said, turning off the dryer and leaving her to her thoughts.
~*~
“So he set a trap, or at least had someone else do it,” Lance said, placing his half-eaten meal on the table.
“Yes. A very effective trap. It’s dangerous to spend very long in the veil. You forget who you are, your purpose. I felt driven to find what I was looking for, but I stopped asking myself why long before I found it. By the time one of the creatures came, I barely knew who I was and had no idea of how to get back.” Azrael shifted the blanket over her lap. Sitting between the two men, fireplace roaring, she was able to shake off the last remnants of what had happened.
“I’m sorry, Az. Maybe I’m just an idiot, but how can you get lost in a place that doesn’t exist? You were here, not in there,” Caleb said.
“I was here in body only. The veil exists. I was there in my mind, yet it’s still as real to me as you are. Blais sent me on a wild goose chase, knowing I would stay too long. It’s not a strong spell, but a smart one.”
“So, what do we do now?” Caleb directed the question at Lance.
“There isn’t much we can do. I’m looking into hiring a few other detectives, and Leolacent heard rumors of some witches in the northern region who are reputed to have untold powers. They might be worth a shot to get the both of you protected.”
“I want to try summoning him again.”
Azrael could have dropped a bomb in the room, and it would have been less explosive.
“No.”
“Not a chance in hell, Az.”
“If I have to tie you down—”
“I’ll help him do it, baby girl.”
She slammed her plate on the table. “Stop it!”
Both men clamped their mouths shut. Azrael stood and walked over to the fireplace, watching the flames lick the pieces of wood, slowly turning them into ash. “Blais is after me, not the two of you. He’s using me, dangling my life in your face, Lance. I’ve been uprooted, nearly died twice, and trapped because of him. Before I did the spell, I was thinking about how I didn’t know who I was anymore. I can’t live like this. I want to take my life back. I’m not stupid. I know how dangerous this is, but I have a plan. The last thing I need is for the two of you to pound on your chests and think you can push me around.”
Caleb sighed. “I’m sorry. I’m just worried about you.”
“I know.” Azrael returned to the couch and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. “And I love you for that.”
“What is this plan of yours?” Lance asked, arms crossed over his chest. “I’m not saying I agree, but I’m willing to hear you out.”
“How about we discuss it tomorrow? I’m still working the details out and would like to rest first.”
“Tomorrow then.” Caleb stood and stretched. “I, for one, need to head to bed myself. Are you coming, Az?”
“I think I want to stay down here by the fireplace tonight. It’s relaxing. I’ll catch you in the morning, though.”
“Sounds good. Night guys.” Caleb patted Smellicious and Bumpkins on the head before walking out of the room.
Azrael nodded to the two pets curled up together in front of the fire. “They sure are getting comfortable with each other.”
Lance grinned. “To my surprise, yes. Bumpkins hates other animals, especially after what happened to him. I should have known he’d befriend a stink demon.”
“Smellicious isn’t so bad now that he doesn’t smell.”
At the sound of his name, her pet lifted his head and sneezed, wiping the trail of snot on Lance’s throw rug.
“I’m not sure I agree with you,” Lance said. “Anyway, since you’re staying down here, I’ll get some blankets and something relaxing to drink.”
Azrael stared at the fire, trying to sort out her thoughts. Lance was coming back with drinks, which gave her the opportunity to discuss what she and Caleb were talking about earlier.
He cares for you.
I care for him too, but that doesn’t mean it’ll work out.
Of course, Lance knew that too. They were in the same boat. Instead of fighting each other, maybe it was time to deal with this together.
Lance stepped back into the room with a blanket and carrying two mugs. He handed her a mug and sat down. “It’s an old family recipe—one of the few things my father didn’t suck at was mixing alcohol. Try it.”
Azrael took a sip. The alcohol was barely detectable beneath the flavors of citrus and cinnamon, but it warmed her to the toes. “Mmmm.”
“Don’t be caught off guard, though. The alcohol content is strong.”
“Even better,” Azrael said, taking another sip. “I’m glad we have a moment to talk. There is something I want to discuss with you.”
“What’s that?”
Azrael set her cup down and turned to face him, pulling her legs up, so her knees touched his thigh. “I wanted to apologize for shutting you down the other day, for calling this a business transaction. It wasn’t fair to you. It wasn’t fair to either of us. If you’d allow it, I’d like us to be able to talk to each other about how we feel instead of ignoring it.”
She couldn’t read the expression on his face, wasn’t sure if he was open to her suggestion. A second seemed to stretch into a minute. Then Lance set his cup down beside hers and scooted closer, bringing one hand up to brush a stray strand out of her face. He traced her lips with his thumb before leaning down and kissing her. His mouth was warm, inviting. Consuming. When he broke it off, she was breathless.
“That wasn’t exactly what I meant by talking,” she mumbled, his face inches from hers.
Lance chuckled. “I may have misunderstood.”
“You know this won’t work out, right?”
“I do.” He leaned down and kissed her neck and ran his tongue under her jaw. “I’m finding it very hard for that to be a good enough reason to stay away from you.”
“Does it bother you at all?” The words slipped past her lips before she could control them.
Lance stopped kissing her neck and pulled away. “Of course it does. I feel guilty every time I think about you, every time I touch you. I feel that way because I feel like I’m betraying the woman who died because of me, and all I’m doing is torturing us. But I can’t stop. I’m just as scared as you are. Probably more so. Do you still…?”
“Still what?”
“Well, you know what I am now.”
He wants to know if I still want him.
Azrael crawled onto his lap, straddling him. She took his face in her hands and kissed him deeply. His hands trailed down her back, giving her chills. She could feel him throb beneath her. He undid her robe, letting it slide to the floor, one hand reaching up and cupping her breast. A moan escaped her lips.
Lance broke off the kiss, laying his forehead against hers. “We may not have to worry about Blais. At this rate, I’m going to die from desire before he ever gets to us.”
“There are other things we can do,” Azrael said, trailing her lips down his neck.
Lance lifted her off him and stood, grabbing the blanket off the couch. “Not tonight.”
“Why not?” she asked, poking out her bottom lip.
“Because I would like to take things slow. Maybe even convince you I’m not a complete ass.”
“That’s highly unlikely.”
“Which brings us back to that bad judge of character you have. Now scoot forward.”
Azrael stuck her tongue out at him. Lance slid behind her on the couch, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling them both down. “For tonight, we are going to sleep right here. After this last scare, I have no intentions of letting you out of my sight again any time soon.”
She opened her mouth to argue, but Lance kissed her before she could say a word.
“Now sleep,” he said, shoving a pillow underneath their heads.
To her surprise, she did.