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Araneae
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“WILL DADDY COME HOME tonight?”
“Your daddy always comes home, Goldie,” I said, forcing a smile. “He’s been very busy lately. I know he misses tucking you in at night.”
Her big brown eyes, the color of her father’s, opened even wider. “How do you know he misses it?”
“Because he told me.”
“I want him to tell me.”
My lips landed on our daughter’s forehead. “He does, sweetheart. Every night he comes into your room and makes sure his princess is safe and sleeping.”
A yawn opened her lips. “Tonight, I want to wait up.”
“How about I read one more story and we can stay up together?”
Our four-year-old daughter nodded as she patted the mattress beside her.
Her long lashes fluttered as I read the words of one of her favorite stories. It was one she could repeat at a young age. Sterling would sometimes try to shorten the story about the velveteen rabbit, by skipping a page or two. He should know that his daughter was too smart for something like that. Every time, she’d call him out and tell him to read every word.
Tonight, I wasn’t trying to shorten the book. No, I’d read the familiar story because I knew in Goldie’s mind she’d hear the words as she drifted off to sleep.
Before I was to the final page, I closed the cover and stared up at the underside of Goldie’s canopy, hoping to hear the sound of footsteps in the hallway.
My thoughts drifted to the man we were both waiting to see.
Sterling Sparrow.
The last few weeks he’d missed dinners and good-nights. He wasn’t alone. All of the Sparrow men were working long hours.
My husband was the kingpin of Chicago with responsibilities that—I knew only too well—ate at him and at all the men in his close advisory circle. With our odd but comforting living situation, I was privy to those men’s expressions and moods and knew that something was brewing in Chicago, something that none of them wanted to worry me or any of the other ladies about.
Goldie’s breathing evened as she rolled onto her side, her tiny fists near her chin as a smile came to her lips and she slept. I marveled at her peace as she lay in slumber.
“Sweet dreams,” I whispered.
“It’s what I always tell her.”
I startled at the deep voice and quickly turned toward the doorway. Standing in the light of the hallway, I saw his silhouette and profile as he turned and came our way.
My finger went to my lips as I struggled with not wanting him to wake our daughter and the desire for her to know he was here.
“She asked for you,” I whispered.
Sterling reached for my hand and helping me stand, pulled me against him and wrapped his strong arms around me. The steady beat of his heart thundered beneath his shirt. With his tie and suit coat gone and sleeves rolled to his elbows, I had the sense that he’d been in the tower for a while.
“Time got away from me.”
Leaning back, I looked up at his dark eyes. Even with the faint illumination of Goldie’s night-light, I noticed the lines and stress in his expression. “She knows you love her.” When he straightened his neck, I felt his body tense beneath my embrace. “Will you tell me what’s happening?”
He shook his head. Releasing me, he stepped closer to Goldie’s bed.
I watched as his large hand teased her light hair away from her face before leaning close and leaving a kiss on her forehead. Once he stood, I took his hand and tugged him toward the hallway. The light shining on Goldie’s bed disappeared as we closed the door behind us and walked hand in hand toward our suite.
Our footsteps tapped a rhythm as we passed the landing. The apartment below was dark, the only radiance coming from the large windows showcasing the bright lights of the city beyond. Once we were in our suite, I went to the windows within.
“Something is happening out there, and you’re not telling me about it.”
Sterling’s strong hands ran a ghostly track over my arms until our fingers intertwined. “Sunshine, there is always something happening. Every fucking day and night.” Letting go of one of my hands, he brought his thumb to my cheek, caressing my skin. “I don’t want you worrying.”
“Telling me not to worry won’t stop me.”
“Oh really?” he asked with a smirk. “I believe we took vows, vows that entailed you committing to do as I said.”
I shook my head as a smile curled my lips. “Sorry, Mr. Sparrow. I had that removed from the vows. After all, I didn’t want to make a promise I couldn’t keep.”
“And what promise are you keeping?”
Lifting myself up onto my tiptoes, I ran my fingertips over his scratchy jaw. “To love you and believe in you and to trust that you will always be honest with me.”
He took a deep breath as his forehead furrowed. Turning toward the windows, he let out the breath. “I’m not being dishonest with you, Araneae. I’ve been hoping that we would take care of this nuisance, and you would never need to know.”
Such as a million nuisances before.
I’d read the headlines or see the breaking news and wonder what role my loved ones played in whatever situation the media deemed worthy of exploitation.
As Sterling spoke, I felt the weight of his words. My husband was a self-proclaimed bad man who used less-than-acceptable means, by society’s standards, to accomplish his goals. I knew that information when he found me. Sterling had been painfully honest with me from the beginning.
That honesty was only one of the things I loved about him.
He was also a man who accepted responsibility for what was his.
Be that me—because I was without a doubt, fully and completely his, our daughter, his brothers-in-arms, their families, or his city, Sterling claimed it. He bore the weight of that responsibility day and night.
As if he’d been awakened, Sterling turned toward me, shaking off the thoughts that had been clouding his mind.
“You’re not going to tell me, are you?”
“Not now,” he said, shaking his head. “Not in the dark of night. Sunshine, when I tell you about it, there will be bright rays of sunshine on your beautiful face. I won’t hide a word but not yet. It’s not time.”
Pressing my lips together, I nodded.
“Will you accept that answer?”
“I will,” I said, “because I trust you, Sterling. You’ll tell me. Until that time, I’ll trust you, Patrick, Mason, and Reid. I will trust you all because I know that we are your number-one priority.”
He took a step away, our fingers still barely touching. “I’m going to take a shower.” He let go of my hand and reached for the buttons on his shirt. “I want to wash this fucking day away.” His dark stare caught mine. “Will you wait for me?”
“What do you have in mind?”
Sterling’s lips quirked. “I have a lot of things in mind. And they all involve you reconsidering that vow to obey.”
I shook my head. “I love you. I’ll wait but only forever.”
As he walked toward our bathroom, I turned back to the skyline beyond the glass, wondering what was happening and what was worrying the man I loved. From high in the sky, the city below sparkled. Cars moved effortlessly along the streets and stars danced in the sky over Lake Michigan. The city was alive with people. Even at this late hour.
I walked closer to the glass and peered out, wondering if I could see what Sterling saw.
It only took a moment for me to realize that I wasn’t seeing what he saw or what any of the other men in the Sparrow organization saw. I saw what they wanted me to see, what they wanted residents and tourists to see. I saw the beauty of the city, the potential, and the exhilarating energy. I not only saw it. I felt it when I was out on the sidewalk or watching a baseball game.
I saw what Goldie saw when we took her to Millennium Park, and she made faces up at the giant bean. I saw the wonder in her eyes when we were at the theater watching as her favorite show came to life.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I knew that the stress and wear on Sterling’s handsome face was but a by-product of his success. I didn’t see the ugly dangers because they were meant to stay hidden.
I’d been at Sterling’s side long enough to know that more than likely by the time I could share his burden, that burden would be gone. From beyond the bathroom door, I heard the sound of the shower’s spray.
Unbuttoning the front of my pajama shirt, I let it slip from my shoulders as I pushed down my panties and opened the door to the bathroom. Perhaps he wouldn’t let me share with carrying the burden, but I could help him in other ways.
Steam met me as I slipped inside the bathroom.