Dear Journal,
I can’t believe Selena isn’t coming to my wedding. I wanted her to meet Andrew and I understand her flight was delayed. I could hear the tears in her voice when she told me she wouldn’t make it. At the same time I was so disappointed I couldn’t stop yelling at her. Wedding jitters, I suppose.
The writing trailed off as if Theresa’s hand had slipped and there were two small discolorations. Selena wished she could’ve read this where she could grieve in private, but grieving would have to wait.
Andrew just left. He heard me crying. I knew I wouldn’t be able to not cry. He came in and held me. That’s one of the reasons I fell for him even though he gets so moody and unpredictable around his father. He wants to start a family right away. He says the more boys we have, the happier his father will be. I’d rather take this time to be alone with him first.
Dear Journal,
I can’t believe it! Our honeymoon was out of this world. Andrew had a few anxieties, but that’s something we can overcome together. And we did during the trip. He rented horses and we rode along the family’s private beach. I was surprised he even went out on the boogey boards and tried to ride the waves. And now, the moment we come home, Andrew is distant and moody. He’s working all the time, rarely spending any time with me. I guess the honeymoon is over. I know he’s been upset over those nights making love, but I thought we’d gotten through all of that. I tried to talk to him and I know it wasn’t the best way to handle it, but I suggested counseling. He blew his top and started ranting and raving. God forbid a Donovan ever see a shrink. I’ve never seen him lose his cool before and it scared me. Two years without a cigarette and here I am lighting up. Gotta go, journal. Someone’s knocking on my door.
Selena closed the book and placed it on her chest. What anxieties did Andrew experience on his honeymoon? Who had placed the hit on Eric?
Two short knocks came into the night’s silence.
Selena’s eyes flew open. She hadn’t realized her eyes had been shut until now.
“Yes?”
The doorknob turned but the door didn’t open.
“Is it okay if I enter?” Andrew asked through the door, his voice low.
She yanked the covers over her body, ran her fingertips through her hair several times. “Yes,” Selena said.
She noticed the light and doused it. The book. The last thing she remembered was setting it aside as she snuggled under the covers. She scanned the bed and then leaned over to the one side and looked.
The door opened.
She flopped against the pillows. Wherever it was, it’d better stay hidden until he was gone.
Andrew slipped through the partially opened door. He wore black lounging bottoms and nothing else but the hair on his chest. He was relaxed and smiling. She could see why Theresa had been attracted to this man.
Almost.
“I see you’re settled in for the night. I can come back another time perhaps,” he said, his eyes black with need and anger at not being received with more eagerness.
“Now is fine. I hadn’t fallen asleep, just drowsy. Sometimes it takes me awhile to fall asleep.” At least ever since she’d left Drake to handle everything, including the night that was supposed to follow their wedding.
Andrew had stopped halfway between the door and her bed. “I don’t think my meaning was clear at dinner.”
“I understood. I’ll give Mary time to adjust to a new nanny. I’d feel the same way if I were in her shoes.”
His eyes narrowed. “Not that. Do you realize why you were hired?”
“Because your son needed a nanny?”
“Mary could, and would, prefer to do the care herself. There’s another reason why you are caring for my son.” He smiled. “The bed is too big for one person. I don’t know why my mother chose it, but it looks good under you.”
She smiled back. “I’m sure I’ll get used to it.”
He advanced a few more steps. Selena had made her meaning loud and clear. “I won’t wait forever for you to invite me in.”
“I sleep alone.”
He sighed. Hand on one of the posts, he leaned closer. “I thought you were the intelligent one. The only reason I’m putting little Eric in your care is so you can get used to the idea of having a child.”
Keep your head on, Selena, she warned herself, stilling her urge to kick him where it would hurt. Her hand strayed to the edges of blanket. She stopped herself from sighing with relief as her hand grazed the journal beneath it.
“I don’t want to take a job if I’m not needed,” she said, pushing herself into a sitting position.
“I had two business appointments scheduled earlier today before those men shot at my family. The first one was for my father, although I didn’t get to enjoy my dinner. The second meeting was for me. I had someone searching for … shall we say … candidates,” he finished with a wave of the hand.
It dawned on her. He hadn’t been putting her on earlier. He’d really meant marriage.
She couldn’t help it; she laughed. Andrew was her brother. “You thought I was one of those candidates. I wish I could say I was the right partner for you, but I haven’t felt the want or the need for a man in my life.” Besides, Drake had spoiled her for any other man.
Andrew waited for her to finish and she knew from the way he checked her out, he was satisfied.
He touched her thigh. His eyes were glazed with a sickness she’d never noticed before.
Instinctively, she moved her leg. Only one person had the right to touch her and he wasn’t here. She sucked her breath in at the thought of Drake’s touch.
Andrew sat on the bed, patting her leg. He’d misinterpreted her reaction. She couldn’t stop from pulling away, but he continued anyways. “It’s okay. You need time. Although you don’t have unlimited time, you do have some time while I finish tying up the loose end of a personal matter.”
He stood up and left as silently as he’d entered.
She shivered. Not from the sexual innuendos but from the unwelcome experience of having another man touching her. She willed herself to rise up from the bed and lock the door. She didn’t want to fight off any more unwanted advances. Not taking any chances, she grabbed the book and placed it in its original hiding place and hopped back into bed, this time throwing her bottoms on the floor, keeping her boy shorts on. She preferred sleeping in the nude, but it was better to be prepared than to wake up being straddled by a sex-craved maniac who needed to buy a wife instead of finding one the natural way.
His words, “I thought you were the intelligent one,” were the last thing on her mind before she fell fast asleep.
• • •
The dream man played with her tonight.
There wasn’t a thing she could do to stop him.
She hated her lack of control. It had taken her all she had not to give into her own desires and run back to the past. What had started out as wondering if Drake was relationship material had changed to seeing how long he could maintain his self-control until their wedding night. She had no problems adding fuel to his fire.
His eyes were black with desire in the moonlit room, promising her sweet release. His laugh was rough, though not unpleasant.
She shivered and couldn’t stop the hiss of desire seeping into the air.
He pulled off his black boots without taking his eyes from her. He undid the button on his black jeans.
She couldn’t move.
He braced his hands on the bedposts and leaned forward. His eyes darkened with need.
Her body betrayed her. And it showed as he reached for her, spreading her legs.
His smile was all revenge.
He was about to collect on her broken promise.
This dream man had the power to freeze every thought and movement except the hidden desires heating up between them.
His eyes approved the body-hugging boy shorts.
“No man will have you but me,” he said. “Did you think I wouldn’t find you?”
His eyes dared her to deny him again. Dared her to deny the desire she felt. He smiled as if he knew she would willingly grant him access for one stroke of his touch.
He tugged the shorts off and tossed them away.
Her hips lifted for his touch, aching for release. He held them in place as he tasted the sweet betrayal. His tongue dipped inside the core center of her heat and devoured every drop. Letting her hips fall gently, he covered her mouth with his hand as his tongue stroked a nipple. She screamed into his hand. Her body reacted instantly to the heat he packed, grinding in short upward motions, seeking more. The dream man captured her hands and held them fast above her head before she managed to gain control. He laughed at her frustration and kissed her neck.
Her breath hitched with each kiss.
“Shh,” he said quietly. He began whispering things, making her wish this was all real so she could rid herself of the building frustration inside before she exploded.
She bit his hand.
He laughed, but kept it in place as he reached lower, stroking. She held her breath. He lifted a finger to his mouth and tasted. She closed her eyes, praying he would finish what he had started. When he plunged his fingers back inside, pushing deeper, again and again, she knew she would be unable to deny him. He stopped.
She bucked harder, frantically trying to free her hands so she could either push him away or flip him on his back and take over.
It was useless. She wouldn’t be free unless he let go on his own.
“How does it feel to want something so bad you can taste it? To lose control of your emotions? When I get the chance, I will take you to a place you wish you’d stayed. I don’t know what the hell is going on, Selena,” he whispered, looking into her eyes.
She tried to move away only to find herself locked in place.
The dream had become a reality.
He was not her dream man but the man she’d left with questions and needs unanswered.
He was as real as her desire.
She bucked harder, trying push him away.
“Honey, you know the saying about a woman scorned? Well, let me tell you …When you give a man promises of ecstasy and fulfillment for waiting and then leave him high and dry … a woman scorned doesn’t hold a candle to what I want to do to you at this moment. But it can wait until there’s no risk of being interrupted or you running away.”
Suddenly she was free of him. The heat vanished instantly, her body limp and bereft.
He had the skills and speed of a cat. He was dressed and standing next to the open French doors in no time flat.
“How did you get in without tripping the alarms?” she managed to get out.
“You figure it out. But I think you have bigger problems, because I won’t be responsible for what I do to your admirer should he touch you again.” With one foot on the balcony, “I don’t know what game you’re playing or whose game you’re willing to play … Remember, you are mine. Until death do us part, Selena.”
Frustrated as hell, and knowing anything she threw his way would only bring Andrew running, she resisted the urge. Not to mention Eric’s life depended on her maintaining her control.
She hated surprises. And hated the fact he had been able to get inside her room with her unaware. “Drake,” she whispered into the night air, taking both handles in her hands. “You will not see me lose control again.” And locked the doors.
• • •
Drake patted his heart, reminding himself of what she was to him.
Part of him had no doubt after seeing her up close that she didn’t belong here, but he couldn’t, for the life of him, understand what the hell it was that brought her to a house which dealt in slavery. Selena didn’t have the exotic beauty Andrew sold, but there was a beauty no woman could touch when she was vibrant and full of attitude. It had sucked him dry waiting and wondering how she would react when they finally made love.
Now he knew.
Larry hadn’t blinked an eye at the stakeout when he passed Selena. He had a lot to answer for and when Drake got his hands on him, Larry would be buying him lobster and crab legs for as long as he lived.
Drake watched as Selena’s curvy silhouette climbed into bed. It would be a while before she fell asleep. In the morning he would care if she had enough sleep to keep her wits about her, but for now, he was content knowing she was lying in bed, seething with the same wants and needs he’d had for the past nine weeks.
In no way would he call them even.
He signaled and waited. The go-ahead came. He scaled down the wall a few feet before he heard the cry. Inwardly, he groaned and signaled his intent to check it out. Using night vision goggles, he scoped Selena’s room. There were traces of tears on her face.
The crying grew louder.
Within seconds he landed back on the balcony. He signaled and turned to listen for the sound again. The wait wasn’t long.
Another cry came from the other side of the door. The crying softer, almost crooning. A rocker sat in the corner. The powder blue-and-white checkered cushion was empty.
He shook his head. Too little sleep could be dangerous for someone in his position.