I float through the morning drive to DC; Matthew’s words have been branded onto my mind. You’re scared. This is your life. You’ll never know until you try.
But even though the conversation keeps replaying in my head, presenting itself from different angles, I’m still in the same place. Because no matter how good Matthew’s points might have been, what he doesn’t seem to understand is that my feelings don’t matter. It’s the circumstances surrounding them that hold the power. The way things are back home, both in my town and in my family, the rigid structure of New Horizons, Carolyn’s dedication to the process, the scars still fresh on my heart. So maybe he’s right: maybe I am scared. But if my choices are safety and security versus certain pain, I know which one I’m going with.
The bus drops us off at the Capitol building. “Remember, everyone!” Mr. Martin calls out before we all disperse. “Meet back here at six p.m. sharp! Don’t be late!”
Daniel, Matthew, Carolyn, Kaylee, and I set off on foot. Daniel has a whole itinerary mapped out for us. First stop: the Capitol Reflecting Pool, followed by the Jefferson and Lincoln Memorials and the Washington Monument. He reads aloud from the guidebook, telling us all the important dates and facts.
“History is fun,” Matthew says sarcastically, as we stare up at the giant obelisk that’s somehow supposed to pay tribute to our first president.
The big event for the day is the National Zoo, which beat out the Smithsonian after Matthew presented a pretty convincing case against spending our one day of freedom stuck in a museum, so after all the history, we walk to the Metro red line.
As we walk, Matthew whispers to me, “I have a plan.”
I give him a sidelong glance. Matthew’s plans are never a good idea—it’s a miracle they haven’t gotten us into trouble yet. “Can’t you take a break from all the scheming for one day?”
He grins. “No way. This is my best plan yet!”
“But we’re having such a nice time—”
“Just trust me. You’ll like this one. I promise.”
His eyes are bright and excited, and I know there’s no talking him out of whatever he’s got up his sleeve. “If you say so,” I say.
We buy our Metro tickets, and a few minutes later, the train rolls into the station. We all get on, and Matthew starts up a conversation with Kaylee and Daniel about which animals they’re looking forward to seeing most at the zoo.
Then, just as the doors are about to close, Matthew turns away from his conversation, grabs me and Carolyn, and pushes us off the train. I trip over my own feet and fall onto the platform, skinning the heels of my hands. By the time I gather my bearings, the doors have closed, Matthew is waving at us from inside the train with the biggest, dopiest grin I’ve ever seen, and Kaylee is pounding against the door, futilely trying to get to us. The train pulls away, and I look up at Carolyn, who somehow managed to survive Matthew’s surprise attack in one piece. She stares back down at me, her eyes huge. We’re alone now. In the city. With no group, no chaperone, and no way to get in touch with them.
I’m going to kill Matthew.