If I could tell new mothers something for which they’d be eternally grateful, it would be to approach motherhood as a child. Mothers who enter motherhood as if they know all there is to know will miss some of life’s most important lessons. Come into motherhood with the awe, the excitement, and the willingness to learn a whole new way of life. Come with the anticipation of a child on his or her first day of school. Isaiah 11:6 KJV says, “a little child shall lead them.” Let your children lead and teach you, ’cause, Mama—we’ve got a lot to learn.
Motherhood is not only a time to watch our children grow but to experience growth ourselves. Grow with me as we walk through the seasons of a mother’s life.
Lessons in Springtime
Motherhood is a seed that begins inside us—a new life, waiting to be born. Spring brings freshness to life. Everything is new and clean and full of happiness and hope. The seed takes hold and begins to grow.
In time the child bursts out to meet the world. Spring is a chance to start over—to bend and mold a tiny babe into the grown-up image of God.
It is a joyful time, a new beginning—full of hope and future dreams.
I love Springtime. Or maybe I just love babies. Even now, every time I hold a new baby, the old yearning starts all over again.
But babies don’t stay babies. Around two years of age a strange phenomenon takes place. That darling little dependent squirt learns three words that threaten to change your life: Me do it.
He’s the little guy who fills your sink to overflowing, then innocently looks up at you and says, “Me help.” And she’s the one who goes into the bathroom and takes her training pants off in front of the potty, just like Mama said. Then she decides to take a walk and piddles all over the house. They are terrible, delightful, exciting, wonder-filled babes who need to explore and test their world.
But somewhere after two and before thirteen, innocence fades and babies stretch into Summer. Walk slowly through Springtime. Let baby teach you how to coo and goo and laugh. Listen closely as he learns to turn sounds into words, and watch as he makes the world his.
[Poem not included because of rights restrictions.]
Slow Down Summer
Summer is a time for planting, watering, and nourishing—a time for growing wild like weeds.
Summer is a time for families and fun, games, water fights, and exploring the wonders of the world.
In Summer, I planted seeds of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. I watered the seeds of my labor with the source of my strength—faith in God. I knew I would reap what I sowed, and I prayed for a bountiful harvest.
But Summer days weren’t always sunny. Rainstorms, thunder, wind, and the tragedies of nature came to steal my joy. Some of the seeds I planted weren’t good. I didn’t mean to, but sometimes I sowed seeds of anger, discontent, frustration, selfishness.
In the Summer of my motherhood, I had moments of selfishness and anger. Sometimes I was too busy. I thought the children had all the time in the world. But they grow so fast in Summer.
Slow down your Summer. Don’t let the days slip by too fast. Sometimes I wish we could go back to when Summer meant sipping sodas in the shade of the old oak tree instead of racing around to see how many things we can get done while the sun’s still out.
Summer is the greatest time for learning mothers. Take advantage of all a child has to teach you. Go outside with Casey on a Summer day and let him show you how to spend half the day doing absolutely nothing. Nothing, that is, except:
Naturally, you can’t spend all your days that way. But take at least an hour or two one day a week to spend with your child and do absolutely “nothing.”
Too soon Summer is over and we slip into Fall.
Reaping Summer’s Harvest
A mother’s Fall brings the harvest. The time has come to reap what we have sown. Nature has matured. Seedlings drop or fly away to start life on their own.
In Autumn moms learn what it’s like to experience the growing pains of adolescence. Take the time to feel and un-derstand the changes and confusion in your teenagers. Let yourself hurt and cry and laugh with them. Some of the best times of my motherhood have been sharing the pain and joy as I watched my children mature into adults, while I grew and developed as a mother.
I was like a maple tree. Back in Spring my branches had burst forth with new life from inside me. I pulled from the well within me and from whatever I could reach around me to nourish them, to help them grow.
Then Autumn winds grew strong, and my branches held mature seedlings. Nature brought the winds and stripped my branches clean. My babies have been whisked away on the winds of life.
Will they survive?
Will they be carried on the wind into dangerous ground?
Will they settle among the thorns and be choked out?
Will they fall on fertile ground?
Autumn was a time for wondering where I had gone right—or wrong. It was a time of anticipation and guilt. I think perhaps the harvest was the hardest time of all.
When they all have flown away …
Growing in Winter
Barren branches. Empty nests. Winter is a time to wait and watch for signs of spring. Sometimes in Winter loneliness reaches inside me like an icy hand and holds me in its frozen grip.
The children have grown and gone; they are living lives of their own.
In Winter I have learned I was not all wrong. And guilt is a thing to be forgiven and forgotten. I watch as Winter snows cover my scars. Even mothers take a lot of spills. God in His grace heals all wounds. And I pause to thank Him.
I wait and watch. Someday, maybe another seed is sown. Another baby born—a grandchild of my very own.
A new life, a new beginning, new hope. Another Spring. Another mother sees the fruit of her labor.
What Kids Need Most …
We’ve covered a lot of territory in learning about what kids need most in a mom. I suppose if I were to choose the three most important things moms can give their kids they would be:
Learning … to always keep an open mind and heart for what children and life can teach you.
Living … a life in day-to-day anticipation of what each new moment might bring. Living to fulfill the needs of those you love—yourself included.
Loving … with a wide, unconditional love that knows no boundaries and has no end.
What do your kids need most in a mom? You.