JOYCE’S CLOSE CALL

DIFFICULTY

FEEDS

The original dine and dash, these treats spell danger

INGREDIENTS

FOR THE COOKIES

2¼ cups all-purpose flour

1⅔ sticks firm butter

¾ cup confectioners’ sugar

2 egg yolks

1 teaspoon vanilla extract or essence

FOR THE CAKE

1⅓ cups (2½ sticks) butter

2 cups sugar

6 eggs (lightly beaten)

3 cups all-purpose flour

6 teaspoons baking powder

¾ cup and 2½ tablespoons cocoa powder, sieved

3 to 4 tablespoons milk

1¼ cups soft butter

1 cup confectioners’ sugar

1 to 2 tablespoons milk

Strawberry or raspberry jam

TO DECORATE

¾ cup confectioners’ sugar

1 egg white

Red and black food coloring

1 packet chocolate peanut candies (i.e. Peanuts M&Ms)

1 packet Kit Kats

18 ounces fondant

1 packet chocolate twigs

Black and yellow food coloring

You will need:

A circular cookie cutter and ideally “R,” “U,” and “N” shaped cutters (though you can use a sharp knife instead)

A fine paintbrush

DIRECTIONS

TO MAKE THE CAKE

Preheat the oven to 325°F. Grease and line a 13 x 9-inch deep rectangular baking pan. Cream butter and sugar until pale in color, light, and fluffy. Add the eggs very gradually, beating well between each addition. Fold the flour into the mix until blended. Add enough milk to give a dropping consistency and spoon into the prepared pan, smoothing the top and making a slight dip in the center.

Bake for 45 to 55 minutes, or until firm to the touch and a knife inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in the pan for a few minutes, then turn out onto a rack to cool completely.

TO MAKE THE BUTTERCREAM FROSTING

Beat the butter in a large bowl until soft. Gently add half the confectioners’ sugar and beat until smooth Add the remaining confectioners’ sugar with a little milk, adding more as necessary to make a light fluffy frosting.

FOR THE FINISHING TOUCHES

Use a knife to cut the cake in half, and then add buttercream frosting between the two halves along with the jam. Cut the Kit Kats to be the same height as the cake and use a little melted chocolate to affix them to the outside of the cake as paneling.

Shape the chocolate twigs in the form of a claw, using a little melted chocolate to hold them together. Once complete, use a paintbrush to decorate the claw with red and black food coloring and then insert into the top of the cake. Roll out almost all of the fondant, adding a little of the yellow food coloring as required, on a floured surface and then drape over the cake and claw, allowing the icing to tear and the claw to penetrate. Add yellow food coloring to the remaining fondant and fashion the telephone, as shown. Use the paintbrush to apply the black and yellow food coloring to create the wallpaper pattern.

Place the “RUN” cookies atop or alongside the cake.

Now get out of the house as quickly as you can and try not to think about how much it will cost to have the wallpaper redone.