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Elleanor
The door swings open suddenly, slamming against the wall. I jump, knocking over the white shirt I had just folded. A whirlwind of perfect curls, snorting like a bull, halts right in front of me.
“Are you really going to go through with this?”
“Yes.”
“Elleanor, if what you told me is true, you’ll be in as much danger as Jae Young. Let’s think of another way to help him.”
“What other way, Mari?” Her shoulders rise and fall. “I can’t leave him alone in that house.”
“Then come back here at least to sleep. I need to know you’re safe, Elle.”
“I’m still not sure how this will work... It depends on Ana’s reaction and Jae’s progress.”
“Call me, update me every day, okay? Whenever possible, Marcus and I will come by.” She hugs me. “Be very careful.”
“I won’t risk my life, or Jae and Ana’s... Believe me.”
Mariana steps back, exhales, and shakes her head. She forces a smile that looks more like a grimace, a pained expression. She leaves the room.
I place the last piece of clothing in the suitcase, zip it from end to end, my heart racing to keep pace. I set the suitcase on the floor, lift the handle, and take a lingering look around my room. I inhale deeply, then let it out slowly. Turning on my heels, I head toward my destination.
––––––––
With my suitcase beside me, I ring the doorbell. While waiting for the door to open, I brace myself and let my eyes wander to the neighboring house, especially the adjacent terrace. The good memories from that year fortify me; they strengthen my body and spirit to keep fighting. The creak of the door turning makes me look towards the sound, revealing two familiar faces sizing me up.
Ana scratches the top of her head, frowns, and blinks a few times before breaking into a wide and warm smile. She walks up to the gate and unlocks it. I can’t resist wrapping my arms around her.
“Auntie! You have no idea how much I missed this hug!”
“Ah! Dear, come more often. Your visits are always a delight. Jung will be so happy when he gets back from the store!”
Tears well up in my eyes. I hastily build a barrier to keep them from spilling over and alarming her. She recognizes me, yet she seems to be living in another moment from the past...
“Of course, Auntie. I hope you don’t mind my staying here. I'll only be a few days to help you take care of Jae.”
Ana links her arm through mine, guiding me inside as we cross the threshold. Wook maintains his stance since he appeared next to his mother: arms crossed, lips pulled to one side, eyes lifeless. From friend to foe. A declared war.
As I pass him, my whole body bristles.
“Are you here to help hyung, or to coerce him into accepting you as a woman?” Ana releases my arm and heads toward the kitchen. I’m not sure if she didn’t hear or if her memory simply doesn’t retain it. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly, deciding to keep moving forward. I grip the handle of my bag tightly. “Yesterday, you saw I’m an excellent brother. Jae doesn’t need you or anyone else to take care of him.”
“Since you’re such a paragon of sibling relationships, there’s nothing to worry about. I’m just here as a backup. I owe Jae for all the times he was there when I needed him.”
“He never lifted a finger for you, Elleanor. Unlike me.”
I start walking again, climbing the stairs. Soon, heavy footsteps catch up with me. A large hand grabs the handle of my bag, forcing me to stop just one level shy of the second floor.
“I'll help you with it.”
“I'm not sick or weak, and I know the house well. I don’t want to be a burden to anyone.”
Firmly, I pull the bag closer to me. Wook removes his hand and remains at the top of the stairs.
I hurry down the hallway towards the room next to Jae's. As soon as the door closes behind me, I leave the bag and slide down to the floor. My legs feel like freshly made jelly. My heart jumps into my throat, and a chill runs through my stomach. I lean against the door, trying to regain control of my breathing, body, and mind.
Once I've recovered, the first thing I do is take a cold shower to relax and keep my senses sharp. I put on a comfortable sweatshirt and shorts, and tie my hair up into a ponytail. I open the door as quietly as possible. The hallway is dark and silent.
“You didn't come here to be scared, Elleanor!” I whisper to myself for encouragement.
I walk on tiptoes until I stop in front of Jae’s old, and now again, room. I tap lightly with my knuckles. A few seconds later, the door opens, and although what I see in front of me is in a fragile state, it’s still the most beautiful sight in the world.
Jae smiles weakly, his eyes squinting.
Ah! Those smiling eyes that I've missed so much!
I feel as though I'm on the verge of a heart attack, the agitation in my chest is so intense I’m not sure I can bear it.
“Daebak! You really came.”
“I gave my word.”
“I would never fail to keep it, unlike m...”
I stand on tiptoes and, with an open hand, cover his mouth. His eyes widen, emitting an intense shine. My face burns—it's likely that my skin is red.
Impulsively, I press my lips against the right side of his face, lingering there for a moment. I relish the warmth and softness of his skin, which has the power to relax all my muscles and chase away any worries. My heels touch the ground again. I gaze at my feet, slowly raising my head. Jae remains motionless and now, in addition to his sparkling eyes, his face is reddened.
“Cough, cough!”
I laugh, turning my face to the side.
“Is your room messy?”
“Mwo?”
“Aren't you going to invite me in?” Jae steps aside, unsteady, and gestures with his hand. As soon as I enter, he awkwardly pushes the door closed, discreetly forming a smile with his lips. His chest moves a little faster than usual. I settle into the armchair next to the bed. Jae mirrors my action, sitting on the edge of the mattress.
“How are you feeling today? Does it still hurt?”
“Just some discomfort in my rib,” he shifts slightly.
“And your head?”
“Don’t worry, Lia. The doctor said it would take a little longer for a full recovery. It's normal to still have headaches.”
“I just want to know how you’re doing.”
I lean forward, placing my hand on his. I notice his larynx move. In a way, this is satisfying and I smile at the scene. Something akin to what some might describe as butterflies in my stomach makes me inhale more sharply.
“I don’t want to interfere. Do you really think it’s necessary to leave your work to take care of me?” He looks at me, his almond-shaped eyes emanating shyness and emitting a captivating glow, much like a starry night. My heart wrestles with my mind, which insists on composure—a command the organ stubbornly ignores.
“Yes. You were by my side when I didn’t know how to deal with my ghosts.” I wrap my fingers around the back of his hand, squeezing it. “I just want to repay you and...”
“And, what?” He tilts his head towards me, narrowing his eyes.
I turn my face downwards, pondering whether it's right to reveal all my feelings. Perhaps I’m pressuring him too much. I lift my face to meet his gaze, and suddenly, reason eludes me.
“Recovering some of the time I lost by my Chingu’s side. That’s how you say it, right? Friend. Best and special friend.”
Jae adjusts his posture, shifting his gaze away to avoid eye contact.
“Nê, that’s the expression we use.” He falls silent. Something is troubling him. A memory? My presence? Or my words?
“Shall we get some sun?”
I stand up, offering my widest smile. Extending my hand, Jae Young studies me with an indecipherable expression. My throat goes dry, and I tremble internally. I almost withdraw my hand, but before I can, Jae places his palm over mine and intertwines his fingers. My eyes moisten. He rises cautiously.
“You’re still a mischievous girl! And I’m still the same boy who can’t say no to you.” We laugh softly and in sync. Not even time could steal this tacit understanding between our bodies and minds. “Just don’t run, Lia.” He places his free hand on the left side of his torso. I nod, squeezing his hand tighter.
We descend the stairs quietly, both to spare him pain and to avoid drawing attention. Once outside, we walk until we reach the old swing. Jae's lips stretch into an eager smile, revealing part of his white teeth. His eyes echo the smile, warming me. And like ice, I melt.
"Do you want to swing?"
"I would love for you to push me like before, but not today. Once your body heals, I’ll remind you of this offer myself. For now, just sitting together is enough."
I help him settle onto the small swing seat. His long legs bend awkwardly, leaving him in a comical position. I can’t help but laugh, shrugging my shoulders.
"Don’t laugh. Think of it this way: I'm a tall, handsome man—strong and generous—fulfilling your wish."
I sit beside him, grasping the swing’s ropes. I tilt my head up, taking in the fresh air and savoring the gentle breeze.
"This was your favorite, wasn’t it?"
"It was the only way to escape from hide-and-seek and to capture your attention, since you always prioritized Jae Wook." I fix my gaze on him. Jae lowers his head, offering a restrained smile.
"My perspective on that time is different. I thought it was my duty to protect my brother and make him happy."
"And, just like when we were kids, you still prioritize him."
I search his eyes for any sign that I'm wrong—that Jae no longer blindly trusts his brother. Suddenly, Jae places his hand on mine, causing my breath to catch.
"That's not what I meant. Our moments hiding during games were special—it was always just us. We’d whisper about silly things, and you would reward me with your beautiful smiles, compliments like 'you're a handsome boy,' which filled my little world with peace and joy. And the best part? Those stolen cheek kisses."
I turn my gaze forward, but from the corner of my eye, I catch Jae staring at my face, as if he's studying a work of art or solving a complex puzzle. A single stubborn tear escapes from the corner of his left eye.
“Lia!” I turn towards him. “Have we discussed something like this before?”
“Similar... in what way?” Suddenly, the scent of violets fills the air.
Gael...
“About my brother... You said I always put him first, even above myself.”
Gael materializes next to Jae, nodding his head.
“I didn't use those exact words, but yes, we've talked about it.”
“What exactly did Jae Wook do?”
“You know,” I reply. Jae closes his eyes, a pained expression on his face.
Gael places his hand on Jae’s head.
What is the reaper doing?
I fix my eyes on Gael, who laughs and shrugs.
“I've seen some scenes, or maybe they were dreams, I'm not sure.” Jae holds his temples, his eyes squeezed shut, his brow furrowed. My heart pounds with worry.
“Gael, he looks like he's in a lot of pain,” I say, speaking to the reaper mentally.
“Trust me, Elleanor.” Gael vanishes like a wisp of smoke.
I step off the swing and kneel on the grass, cradling Jae's face in my hands.
“Do you want to go inside? You don't look well.”
“Wook told me you two were dating. You were furious with me for believing him...”
“Yes, I was. But I'm not anymore.”
I support Jae’s arm, helping him to walk. We pass by Wook, who quickly descends the steps. He stops and stares at us. I ignore him, focusing on helping Jae.
“What happened, hyung?”
“Nothing. He just got tired, so we're heading back to the room.” I don’t glance at Wook or pause in our steps. The further away from him, the better.
I lay Jae on his bed and cover him with a sheet. I grab the medicine prescribed by the doctor and pour water from the jug on the bedside table. He drinks it. Sitting beside him, I gently stroke his hair.
“Elleanor, I...”
“Shh! I know. You’ve already told me. Rest now.”
I stand up from the bed. Before I can step away, Jae catches my hand and pulls me toward him with force. I fall onto him, our lips nearly touching.
My heart races with the closeness, and our eyes reflect each other’s, like magnets drawing together.
“Nan neoleul joh-ahae, Lia.” The tears I had been holding back now stream down my face uncontrollably. “I don’t know if I’ll remember everything, or when. That’s why I don’t want to waste any more time.”
His hand brushes a strand of my hair behind my ear, then slides down to my nape, pulling me closer. His lips meet mine gently and tenderly. Warmth spreads through my chest, and our hearts beat as one. His kiss, so much sweeter now that he’s truly here.
He slowly pulls back from the kiss.
“Today is our first day.”
“If I hadn't watched Korean tv dramas, I wouldn’t understand,” I reply. Jae laughs. “And what shall we do on our first official date?”
“I haven’t thought about it yet, since I'm not...”
“Just being by your side is enough.”
“Elleanor, can we keep this a secret for now?”
Is Jae still concerned about how Wook might feel, or is he afraid? Either way, I don’t think it’s wise to let Wook know.
“Sure. It’ll be fun, oppa[49].” Jae smiles, his cheeks blushing.
He exhales as if a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders. His almond-shaped eyes sparkle. He caresses my face and strokes my nape, sending a thrill through every cell in my body. The wait has felt like an eternity. I smile back at him as he wipes the tears from my cheeks.
Now, I bring my hands to his face and it’s my turn to kiss him. I pour all my passion into the kiss, a testament to the love that has lived in me since the first time I saw his smiling eyes.