CHAPTER 30

Wilder

 

I’d found myself in a state of relief and fear as I sat on my front porch. Frankie was on the step below me, and I was absentmindedly rubbing her shoulders and running my fingers through her silky hair. We’d gotten back from my dad’s about an hour ago, and since then, I hadn’t said but two words to her. I wasn’t even sure what to say.

The truth, I guessed. Since she wasn’t speaking either, I figured she was waiting for me to break the ice. “I was never going to tell you about Cricket.”

“Why?” she asked without any anger in her voice, which I wasn’t expecting.

“Mainly because of what happened with my family tonight. I didn’t want to risk it slipping, and because I never wanted you to feel like your talent isn’t what got you to where you are.” I wrapped my arms around her chest and rested my head against hers so my lips brushed her ear when I continued. “But also because I didn’t want you to think it was another thing I lied to you about. I don’t want this to be something you use against me when you decide you’re done with me. I already—”

She spun around and glared. “I’m never going to be done with you. I love you, Wilder.”

“I wanted to tell you, but—”

“I get it, Ben.” My lips twitched at her ridiculous nickname. “Really, I do. And to your points, I already knew someone recommended me to Belle… to Cricket, so that wasn’t news. My success is my own, but I also got lucky with her hiring me for her wedding. I already knew that, and I kind of forgot about it, to be honest, but for the longest time, I always wondered who her friend was because I wanted to thank them. And lastly, I understand you not telling me because of your family. I actually fell in love with you a little more knowing that you risked that for me when you barely knew me.”

I cupped her jaw and ran my thumb along her soft skin. “I always wanted you to be happy, Frankie, even if it wasn’t with me.”

“And you make me happy. You’re the only one who ever did. And honestly, if things didn’t happen like they did tonight, I might be a little more upset that you pretended not to know what I did for a living at first. How did you know, anyway?”

“Total happenstance. Molly was at my house one day and was looking at social media on my computer. She never closed out of the site because when I went to shut the computer off that night, it was still open. It had been years since I’d seen you, but because I never stopped thinking about you, I searched for you under her account, but the only thing that came up was your bakery.”

She lifted a shoulder. “I don’t have any social media except for work stuff.”

“Yeah, me neither, so I started looking at your cake website. I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I still had Cricket’s number in my phone, and I called it, not knowing if she still used that number anymore. She answered, and I told her about you but made her promise not to ever tell anyone that I contacted her. I didn’t know if anything would come of it, and it wasn’t until the next year when I happened to be in the waiting room while Dixie was being born that I was flipping through a magazine and it had pictures of Cricket’s wedding and her cake that you designed. And just so you know, my reaction to you sitting across from me and giving me your business card with Wild Confections on it was totally genuine… it means the world to me that you chose that.”

It was a welcome relief that she wasn’t mad about me keeping that from her. “We’ve already been through enough, and I know your heart was in the right place now and back then, so I’m not upset at all. And I’d never hold it against you. I swear, Wilder. You have to believe me because you have to stop thinking I’m going to leave you. I’m not.” She turned fully and sat up on her knees. “I’m not leaving you for anything. Please believe me. Please trust me. Please have faith in me to be what you thought me to be because I am. I’m yours, just like you’re mine. And when you keep telling me you’re afraid I’m going to leave, what you’re really saying is you don’t trust me, and that hurts—”

“I do trust you.” I dropped my forehead to hers. “I do. And you’re right. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. Just believe in me, believe in us, in our family. Because we’re not going anywhere.”

My mouth brushed her soft lips when I muttered, “No, you’re not going anywhere. Not ever.”

“Not ever,” she whispered. “Never ever.”

* * *

I wasn’t sleeping. I had no clue when I’d ever be able to sleep again, at least not deeply. Mav was rightfully pissed at me, and I understood why he was disappointed. I was, too. But love made you do crazy things, and the only time I could say I betrayed my family was because of Frankie. The only time I ever would do something like that is because of Frankie.

I’d been sitting with the knowledge of that decision since I made the phone call to Cricket, but knowing now that it might have been part of the reason it led to Mav sleeping with Brenda made me feel like even worse shit.

I was torn because I knew that what I did helped Frankie’s career and put her out into the world so she could get the success she deserved, so I couldn’t really regret reaching out to Cricket. It just sucked that it had to be at the expense of Maverick, but back in the day, when it came to Cricket, Mav would have done anything for her, even if that meant it could have potentially pissed off one of his brothers. So he could be upset, but deep down, I knew he’d eventually understand… at least, I hoped.

My phone vibrated on my nightstand, and I opened it up to see a text from Brody telling me he was in my driveway. I wasn’t expecting him, so I knew what he had to say was important. I rolled out of bed and rushed downstairs to find him leaning on his truck. “Sorry to wake you, but I thought you’d want to know.”

Yeah, definitely important. “Shit.”

“Zee was married to another woman when he got Dorothy pregnant.”

“Seriously?”

Brody ran his tongue along his teeth. “Yup. He’s got a son, too. His name is Sutton, and he’s a few years older than Piper and Frankie. The ex raked Zee through the coals in court. She got nearly full custody of Sutton. Here’s where it gets interesting.”

“It wasn’t already?” I snapped.

“Remember when I made the decision to pass on working full-time at the garage and head up the new facility for my security company out here instead? Which meant my dad had to hire another mechanic…”

My eyes closed, and I growled, knowing where he was headed with this shit. “Yes.”

“Yeah, so he hired Sutton.”

Dammit. “That’s why Piper warned me Frankie would see him.”

“Seems like it.” He lifted a shoulder. “The good news is, he’s a good guy. Clean record, hard worker. He keeps to himself, and it would appear he doesn’t really have much of a relationship with Zee, if he has one at all.”

“Anything else?”

“No. There’s no threat against her or anything, so other than finding out she has a brother, that’s it.”

I huffed. “That’s it, huh?”

“Compared to what y’all have already been through, I’d say that’s nothing.”

“Not sure that’s something I’m proud of.” I lifted my chin. “Thanks for the info.”

“Anytime.”

I didn’t wait for him to drive away before I went back inside. And when I got into bed, I still wasn’t able to fall asleep, so when Frankie woke up the next morning, all it took was one look at me for her to know something was wrong. “What happened?” she asked with a yawn as she sat up. “Maverick?”

Damn, but I wished that was the only problem right now. “Nothing new with him. He’s just gonna need time.”

“Then why do you look like that?”

“Like what?”

She pressed her palm against my cheek and rested her other hand on my bare chest. “Like you’re on the verge of either crying or screaming.”

“Because that’s how I feel.”

“What’s wrong?”

It was now or never. I could have easily pretended I didn’t know because there was no way in hell Brody would say a word. But that wasn’t what Frankie and I had. Not anymore. If I wanted our relationship to be as good as I knew it could be, then there couldn’t be any secrets. Even when those secrets were painful enough to leave permanent scars. “Before I tell you, I need to know… do you want me to tell you something that’s going to be extremely hurtful, or do you want me to keep it to myself, and you can continue living your life as it is now.”

“Extremely hurtful?”

“Yeah, honey.”

“Is it about you? About us?”

I shook my head. “It’s not.”

“So that means it’s about my family?”

“Yeah.”

“How much worse is it than what I already know?”

I weighed the options in my head. “It’s along the same lines of that. But it also could help you understand things a little bit better.”

“How did you find out about this… extremely hurtful thing?”

“I asked Brody to look into it.”

She knew what he did for a living, so she took that information in and thought about it for a second. “Can we have breakfast? And then maybe go for a ride to see the flowers?”

“We can do that.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, honey.”

She rubbed her thumb across my stubble. “You’ve done so much for me, from the first time I met you to in between, and again when we reconnected. It may not have been a normal start to a relationship, but the result is that I have you. And you get me. You understand me, and I never thought I’d have that in my life. So yes, I do. Because it means the world to me that you care about me enough to understand I need a minute before you tell me what deep down, I think I already know.”

I waited until she made the first move to get out of bed, and then we got ready together, and I left her in the bathroom while I started making breakfast. She’d developed a craving for eggs Benedict over the past couple of months, and at first, I didn’t know how to make them, but I’d become an expert. So much that by the time she’d come into the kitchen, I had just poured the Hollandaise sauce over the eggs.

“Thank you.” She sat at the island as I slid the plate her way. “Looks delicious as always.”

I’d cracked four eggs into a pan and sprinkled them with salt and pepper while I poured a glass of apple juice for Frankie and me. I flipped my eggs and shut the flame off while I grabbed my oatmeal from the microwave and leaned on the counter and took a bite.

With the exception of us not speaking, it was a typical morning. As much as I wanted to take Gunner to the field, I figured it would be better if I took something else, so I opted for the golf cart since it had a bench seat, and she could sit close to me.

Frankie rested her head on my shoulder while I drove us, and once we arrived, she walked over to the swing. I stood next to her and gently pushed her back so she could get a bit of momentum. “I’m ready.”

I took a breath and then I told her that her dad has another kid. I explained everything I knew in the most gentle way possible. It broke my heart to see her pain in hearing the news, but it was what had to be done.

She listened intently, and when I finished, she dug the tip of her shoe into the ground. “Brody found all of this out?”

“Yes.”

“Why did you ask him to in the first place?”

“Piper made a comment that concerned me, and with everything else, I needed to know.”

Her brows pulled together. “What did she say to you? And when?”

“The day you decided to move your business to Warrenville. She warned me that you’d see him, and then it would hurt you, and it would be my fault.”

Dirt scattered when she kicked at it and particles floated in the sun rays. “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad I know.” She stood and wiped her hands on her sundress. “Can we go back now?”

“We can do whatever you want, honey.”

“I’d like to go back home now. I have some work to do, and I know you do, too.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m good to stay—”

My words were cut off when she finally tilted her head back, and I saw the sheer agony on her face. “I really just want to go home now, please.”

“Okay.” I held her face and kissed her nose. “Let’s go home.”

She sat stiffly next to me and went straight to the laundry room when we got back. I heard her slamming the doors in there and walked over to see her whipping the towels sharply before she aggressively folded them. “You all right?”

“I’m fine,” she said to the wall. “Just fine.”

“You sure you’re okay for me to go to work? I can—”

She spun around and glared at me. “I’m not fragile, Wilder. I don’t need you to tiptoe around me like I’ll break if you so much as touch me. Go to work. I’m fine.”

I held my hands up in a placating gesture and backed out of the room. She clearly needed her space, and as much as I didn’t want to, I gave it to her. After grabbing a bottle of water out of the fridge, I went outside and was just opening the door to my truck when she came flying out of the house.

“Wait.” She threw herself at me and I caught her, going back a step. “I’m sorry. I’m just really upset and confused, and I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

“It’s okay, honey. I understand.”

“No. You’re not my punching bag. I just… I just need a little time to wrap my head around it is all. I promise I’ll be fine when you come home for lunch.”

“Take all the time you need.”

She leaned back and ruefully shook her head. “I really don’t know how I got so lucky.”

“You being a klutz had something to do with it, running into me, falling off a horse and breaking your arm, throwing darts at me.”

Her lips twitched as she fought a smile. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.” I bent down and kissed her belly. “And I love you, too.” Then I kissed her. “Call me if you need me.”

“I always need you, but I think I’ll be okay for a few hours.”

“I won’t.”

That made her smile, so then, I finally let her go.