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DAN DROPPED HIS GYM bag on the hall floor. ‘Mmm, are we having curry?’
Tamara whipped open the lounge door. ‘Hurry up, Dad. Dinner’s ready and me and Joel are famished. Mum said we had to wait for you.’
Penny had been acting strangely lately. More attentive, almost affectionate. He walked into the kitchen and lifted the lid from a pan of simmering red lentil dahl – his favourite.
‘What’s the occasion?’ he asked.
Penny laughed. ‘Don’t be daft. It’s just dinner.’ She put down the pan of rice she’d been rinsing and reached up to kiss his cheek. He recoiled as her lips brushed his skin.
He stepped towards her. ‘Sorry, I thought I was in your way.’
Penny turned back to the sink. ‘You’d think I never kissed you.’
‘You don’t.’ Dan touched her shoulder gently. She flinched. ‘See, you do it, too.’
She gave him a weak smile. ‘Forget it. Could you pour me a drink, please? There’s a bottle chilling in the fridge.’
Dan picked out the extra-large red wine glasses from the dresser.
‘Not those. It’s a white – Pinot Grigio,’ said Penny.
‘Doesn’t really matter, does it?’ Right now, he felt like drinking it straight from the bottle.
He couldn’t fathom Penny’s mood and it unnerved him. A few weeks previously, at the end of his tether, after yet another embarrassing evening with friends – during which she’d drank too much and told everyone he’d never known what to do with her breasts – he’d tackled the subject of their relationship. To his surprise, she’d admitted she was also struggling to keep up the façade. She’d remained calm and pretty much unfazed – almost as if she wasn’t that bothered. She’d even said it was a relief to get it out in the open. Apparently, she’d been worrying about how they’d get through the next couple of years, but she hadn’t dared say anything because of their agreement.
He’d even dared contemplate a real future with Michelle. She’d mentioned the online dating, but he was doing his best not to think about that. At the time, he felt like he’d been winded, it had been so difficult to remain composed. He’d felt bad lying about hugging Penny, but it was all he could think of saying to make Michelle feel free to date. What else could he do after the way he’d hurt her? He did want her to be happy, but it killed him to think of her with another man.
Since their chat, Penny had been more amiable, not to mention sober, than she had in years. But she’d never kissed him. That had taken him completely by surprise, and he didn’t know how he was supposed to react. He wondered whether, now that they’d cleared the air, she felt able to show a little platonic affection.
After a couple of glasses of Pinot Grigio, the atmosphere eased and the four of them enjoyed a lovely meal. As the sun was still shining, they retired to the patio for coffee and strawberry cheesecake, after which Tamara and Joel disappeared off to the cinema. Dan was about to go inside to watch Top Gear, when Penny put a Killers’ CD on the music system and slid open the conservatory doors. She danced her way out carrying two tumblers of Jack Daniels on ice.
A few more generous measures later, they were up dancing on the decking, with Dan on air guitar and Penny up front on garden rake mic. He couldn’t remember the last time they’d had so much fun together. Certainly not since the early days of their marriage, and even then, rarely. Theirs was going to be the most amicable divorce ever. Dan sank to his knees in the style of Ritchie Blackmore and thrashed the life out of his air Stratocaster.
It was dark when he awoke, unsure where he was or why. As he came to, he realised he was cuddling Penny, in their bed. He had a vague recollection of the pair of them, giggling and riving clumsily at each other’s clothes.
Oh, God. He’d been unfaithful to Michelle.
Penny’s naked body felt angular and unfamiliar. He wanted to retract his arm but was scared he’d wake her. He needed time to think. His head throbbed. The air in the bedroom was so heavy he couldn’t catch his breath properly. It felt as if his ribcage had been clamped.
There was no way he could leave her now, he thought, as the repercussions of his actions hit him.
Penny groaned, turned over and pushed him away. ‘Get out of my bed,’ she said, half-asleep.
Dan stumbled through to the bathroom and gulped down cold water straight from the tap. He stared at his reflection in the cabinet mirror above the sink. ‘Stupid fucking idiot.’
Back in his own room, he sat on the edge of the single bed and plugged in his mobile to charge. Michelle’s message flashed up. She still missed him. ‘Oh, for God’s sake. What the hell am I supposed to do now?’
