35

Dolly

I blinked against the bright light several times, then closed my eyes again.

“Dolly? Honey, it’s Momma. I’m here.”

I heard my mother’s familiar voice and then felt her smooth, cold palm cover my hand.

“Is it too bright? Here, I’ll turn off the lights,” she said, and her touch was gone. “There,” she said. “That should be better.”

I opened my eyes again and stared up at her, hovering over me.

“Thank you, Jesus,” she breathed, grabbing my hand in hers. “You scared me good.”

I tried to talk, but my throat felt too dry.

“Are you in pain? I can call the nurse.”

I raised my hand to touch my throat. “Water,” I whispered.

“Right! Let me go get a nurse. Don’t try and move. They closed up your chest after they took the tube out, and your leg is in a cast.”

The horn, the impact of the car, and…Tex’s voice. I remembered seeing his face. He had begged me to stay with him. That Micah needed me. I winced at the thought. Micah. Closing my eyes again, I wished I hadn’t woken up. The darkness that had pulled me under had been pain-free. Not just the physical, but the emotional too.

“The nurse is coming, honey,” Momma assured me. “You did real well in your surgeries. You’re gonna be right as rain again before we know it. The church is getting meals lined up for us, and Mary Margaret and Sue Ellen are already at the house, getting your bedroom fixed up. The prayer chain has been hard at work. Everyone is praying. You’re gonna be just peachy keen.” She patted my arm.

She had just described hell to me. Funny how all the church folks’ good work was a level of hell I did not wish to visit. But then, did I have another choice? I didn’t know all my injuries, but from the way I felt, it wasn’t good. She had said my leg was messed up, and it didn’t feel like I was going to be getting up to walk anytime soon.

“Pep,” I choked out.

I needed Pepper. She’d save me from going back to Momma’s. I didn’t want to burden her, but she could help me come up with a better option.

“Oh, she’s in the waiting room. Has been since even before I got here. They said only one at a time could be back here for now. You want me to send her back?”

I nodded.

“And the nurse is here. She can get you comfortable. Pepper will be here in just a sec,” she assured me, then thankfully left the room.

A lady with short auburn hair and bright green glasses stepped up to the bed. “I’m going to sit you up enough to drink some water, but I need you to sip it slow through the straw. I got you a cup of ice, too, that I’m going to leave beside your bed. You can let that melt in your mouth, and it’ll ease the raw throat from where the breathing tube was. How is your pain level on a scale of one to ten—one being barely nothing to ten being excruciating?”

“Six,” I replied barely above a whisper.

“I’ll add some morphine to the IV and see if we can get it down to a four at least. Sip slow,” she said as she placed the straw between my lips.

“Dolly,” Pepper said, and I finished taking my sip to look over the cup at her.

I smiled at her, thankful that she was here. If I’d only had my momma here for this, I might have forced myself to slip into a coma just to escape. Pepper would help buffer Momma and all her good intentions.

The nurse moved back, and Pepper rushed to my side and grabbed my hand in both of hers.

“You scared the shit out of me. I’ve never been so terrified in my life,” she said, reaching up and brushing some hair off my forehead. “You’re not allowed to cross a street alone again. Do you understand me?”

“I’m sorry,” I said, feeling guilty for what I must have put her through. I couldn’t imagine how I would feel if the situation had been reversed.

“Don’t apologize. You can make it up to me later. I can’t stay in here long. Micah is about to rip the entire hospital apart with his bare hands if he doesn’t get in here to you. He’s already threatened the lives of two nurses and a doctor.”

My eyes widened. “Micah?” I asked.

“Yeah, you know, the asshole brother of mine who can’t stay away from you? Remember him?”

The memory of Calista and what all she had said before I was hit replayed in my head.

“I don’t want to see him,” I said. “I can’t, Pep.”

She sighed heavily and tilted her head to the side. Understanding in her eyes was clear, but I knew her well enough to know that she was about to try and talk me into seeing him.

“Dolly, he needs to explain some things. He’s been real messed up about this. I’ve never seen him this pitiful. Not even when our dad died. Just listen to him, okay? Trust me?”

“I just can’t,” I croaked. “He feels guilty, and I can’t listen to him. See him. I need time.”

Pepper leaned down closer to me. “Yes. He is blaming himself, but that is not what he wants to say. I swear, you need to just listen to him.”

“No.” I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t in the right state of mind. Healing from one thing at a time was all I could handle.

“Dolly—”

“No!” I said firmly. “No!”

Pepper finally nodded. “Okay. Calm down. I’ll talk to him. Maybe he won’t destroy the waiting room and kill any employees who stand in his way.”

I already knew he wasn’t going to fight that hard to get back here to me. He would probably be thankful for the reprieve. It would give him more time before he told me he was still in love with Calista. That he cared about me, but we were over.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” I said.

Pepper didn’t look convinced. “Do you want me to send your momma back? I’d come back, but someone is going to have to control Micah. I’m the only one he might not punch.”

I rolled my eyes. “Momma can come back, but don’t leave me with her long. Please. She’s trying to take me to her house when I’m let out.”

Pepper raised her eyebrows. “Oh, I can promise you right now, that won’t happen.”

I wanted to reach out and hug her. “Thank you.”

She smiled. “Not me you need to thank, but nevertheless, I’ll go deal with the beast outside and send your momma back. If I can. I’m not making any promises. But I will do my damn best.” She turned and left the room without explaining herself.

I tried to reach the cup of ice, but moving hurt too much. Taking deep breaths was painful as well. In fact, just about everything was throbbing or aching in some way.

Loud voices caught my attention outside the door, and I listened, but it was muffled. There was some shouting, and the door swung open. Micah entered the room, looking…rough. His eyes were wild, his hair looked like he’d run his fingers through it and pulled it in different directions, and he was breathing hard.

“I tried!” Pepper called out as Micah closed the door, not taking his eyes off me.

He took long, determined strides toward me. When he reached me, he grabbed the edge of the bed, and his head fell forward as he let out a weary sigh.

“Fucking hell, Tink. You took years off my life, baby.” His hand slid under mine, and he held it. “There aren’t words to tell you how sorry I am.”

“Don’t,” I said, wincing from an agony worse than the injuries to my body. “I can’t. I know. You’re forgiven. Just go, Micah. Please.”

His blue eyes searched my face, and I realized they were bloodshot.

“No. I’m not going anywhere. There’s a real good chance I’ll never leave your side again. I can’t go through something like this again.”

I stared up at him, not real sure what he was saying. Guilt was one thing, but this seemed like more.

“Calista came to see me,” I told him.

He nodded, and a darkness settled over his expression. “I know. She’ll pay for it too. I won’t rest until she suffers a hell worse than what she did to you and what I was put through today.”

His hand tightened over mine, and he pulled the chair my mother had been sitting in up as close as it would get to the bed, then sat in it so he was eye level with me.

“She loves you,” I told him.

If he was going to force me to do this now, then I needed to rip myself wide open and get it done.

“No, Tink. She loves herself. She always has. But even if she did love me, it wouldn’t mean shit.” He leaned forward, his eyes locked on mine. “Because I’m so goddamn in love with you that I can’t see anyone else. I just see you. Everywhere I go, you’re all I think about. When shit gets bad, I want you because I know that when I see you, my world will be set right again. You’re my own little sunshine that I don’t deserve and I sure as shit never expected. But from the moment you looked at me across that bar with those gorgeous eyes, I wanted you. I just didn’t know then that I’d come to need you. You’re mine, Tink, but I’m yours. I can’t be anyone else’s. You own me.”

He reached over and brushed a tear from my cheek with his thumb. “Now, tell me you love me. I need to hear it. Today has threatened to take my damn soul. Love me, Tink.”

I sniffled. “I do.”

A small smile tugged at his lips. “I need to hear the words, baby. Give me that. Please.”

I turned my hand over in his and squeezed it back. “I love you, Micah Abe.”