The text came when Theo was driving home from his parents the Saturday of Thanksgiving break.
Found Cal’s dealer.
Theo pulled over, stared at the phone, and then swore until his voice gave out. He was still staring at the phone when another text from Auggie came through.
Did u die from a rage stroke?
Theo texted back: What are you talking about? Then, because he knew Auggie too well, he immediately started composing again: And don’t explain what a rage stroke is.
Too slow. Auggie’s reply came as Theo was hitting send: A rage stroke is when you get so angry your brain pops.
Theo glared at the phone.
I’m giving u five seconds to catch up, Auggie wrote.
Explain to me very clearly what you did.
In person.
No, Auggie. Right now.
But Theo was still typing those words when, Tomorrow. When I get back to Wahredua, came through.
Theo hit send.
Five second catch-up, Auggie sent.
Theo took those five seconds to breathe deeply. Then he texted, I’m incredibly upset right now. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Text me when the shuttle is getting to Wahredua.
And so, after a sleepless night and an unproductive morning—Theo tried to work on his thesis and ended up, instead, pacing and occasionally throwing things—he was sitting on the low stone wall outside the Sigma Sigma house when the Silver Bullet Airport Charters bus pulled up to the curb. A handful of guys got down from the bus. Auggie was the last one. He smiled and waved at Theo as he waited to retrieve his luggage. Then, towing two huge bags, he headed for the Sigma Sigma house.
“Excuse me,” Theo said.
“Hi, Theo. Just going to drop these off.”
“You have ten minutes, starting right now.”
Auggie laughed.
“We’ll see if you’re still laughing in ten minutes and one second,” Theo said.
Something in his face must have communicated what he was feeling because Auggie offered a sickly smile and hurried toward the Sigma Sigma house. By the third step, he was running.
It was the last day of November, and it was practically balmy, unnaturally warm for that time of year. Theo had decided against a coat before the ride over, and now he unbuttoned his flannel work shirt, grateful he had chosen to wear a tee underneath. The bus pulled away, the engine rumbling up, the whine before shifting gears, and then the street was silent. Behind Theo, the door to the Sigma Sigma house opened. He checked his watch.
“Eight minutes, sixteen seconds,” he said without looking over his shoulder.
“I had to pee,” Auggie said, his voice drawing closer. “And some people actually like me. They wanted to say hi.”
“No,” Theo said when he saw Auggie. “Go back inside and put on appropriate clothes.”
Auggie pulled at the tank that said Slutbreaker and glanced down at the shorts that were barely long enough to cover his crotch. The little shit had changed clothes in the eight minutes and sixteen seconds he’d been out of sight. And he’d done it on purpose, the way he did everything on purpose, to fuck with Theo.
“What?” Auggie said, pulling up the tank to chew on the collar. In the process, he exposed the faintly defined muscles of his stomach. “It’s a nice day. It’s in the seventies. It’s beautiful, especially for November.”
“Do not test me, Auggie.”
More chewing. A thoughtfully arched eyebrow. Considering noises. “I mean, if it makes you uncomfortable . . .”
“Get your ass back inside and put on clothes.”
“I have clothes on.”
“Real clothes.”
“These are real.”
“Auggie!”
He didn’t smile. He didn’t even look remotely close to pleased. If anything, he looked slightly hurt, and he plucked at his tank as though seeing it for the first time. But Theo knew Auggie better than he knew just about anyone, and he knew that inside, Auggie was gloating.
When Auggie came back, he was in his Jordans, jeans, and a long-sleeved tee.
“Talk,” Theo said.
“We might have to talk as we drive,” Auggie said. “I want to catch Sadie before she leaves her apartment.”
“Is Sadie the dealer?”
“I mean, she’s a person, Theo. I don’t think she identifies primarily as a drug dealer.”
Theo stood up from the wall. Auggie took a step back.
“Cut it out,” Theo said. “You’re mad at me. Fine. You want to punish me. Fine. I’ll take all the shit you want to dump on me because I know I treated you badly, and I’m sorry. But what you’re playing around with, it’s the real thing, so don’t act like we’re talking about scoring weed from a kid after gym class. If you aren’t taking this seriously, you’re putting both of us in danger.”
The color under Auggie’s light brown skin was a dark, dusky red. His chin came up. “I’m taking this seriously.”
“Then act like it.”
He bit his lip, and for a moment, his eyes were shiny. Then he blinked and said, “She’s the dealer.”
“How do you know she’s Cal’s dealer?”
“I’ll tell you in the car if you want to go with me. If you don’t want to, then I’m going by myself.”
“I’m here, aren’t I?” Theo said.
In the Civic, they were both silent for the first five minutes of the drive. The car provided its own soundtrack: the screech of brakes, an ominous gasping noise on even the slightest hills, and a rhythmic whumping that kicked on and off to no pattern that Theo could discern.
“We’ll have to be fast,” Auggie said. “There’s a party tonight at the house. Everybody’s going to be there.”
Theo rolled down the window.
“Dylan will probably be there.”
Theo put his hand out to catch the breeze. The air felt good between his fingers.
“Maybe I’ll see if Sadie’s got any good weed.”
“You made your point, Auggie.”
“I’m not making a point.”
“You just wanted to casually remind me that you do drugs.”
“Not everything is about you, Theo. I didn’t change my clothes to make you mad. And I’m just making conversation.”
Shaking his head, Theo tried to concentrate on the portion of Wahredua they were passing through. It was mostly a blur. An aluminum mailbox with stick-on numbers. A newspaper still in its plastic, although it had obviously been left out in the rain. How long, Theo wondered. A week? Two? A month? A Pepsi two-liter caught in a storm drain.
Then he was talking even though he didn’t want to. “So now you’re a frat boy.”
“What?”
“Last year, you started off as the tough guy with the cigarettes rolled in your sleeve. Then, for a while, you actually seemed like a human being. Now you’re a frat boy. Next thing, you’ll be talking about all that pussy you’re getting. You’ll be a straight boy in a rugby shirt. Send me an invite when you get that tribal tattoo. I want to make sure I’m keeping up.”
Auggie’s hands tightened on the wheel. When he spoke, his voice was thick. “Fuck you. Why are you so mean to me?”
“Because you’re trying to make me mad with this bullshit. And I am mad. And I’m scared. And I look at you, and I think about Luke, and I can’t even see straight. My brother died, Auggie. He died caught up in this kind of shit. And now you’re doing it too. I can’t even breathe. I thought maybe you’d started thinking clearly when you didn’t talk about this for months, and now, out of the blue, I find out you’ve been looking for drug dealers this whole time. My heart just about jumped out of my chest. Jesus, Auggie, how the fuck am I not supposed to be terrified that something’s going to happen to you?”
They drove for another mile, start-and-stop traffic, a long red light, someone’s car thumping with bass, the smell of fried chicken from the KFC on the next block.
“I’m sorry,” Theo said. He risked a look; Auggie’s jaw was still set. “That was a lot to unload on you. I’ve been carrying it around, and I didn’t know how to say it. I definitely didn’t want to say it like that.”
“No, it’s—” His voice was strained. “It makes sense. I knew about Luke. I just didn’t put it together. And I wish you had told me that’s why you were acting so weird. I thought you just hated me because I saw you, you know, when you weren’t having a good night. And it’s been really hard because you’re my friend and I’ve really missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too.”
The street they were on was residential, with small frame houses and untended yards. On the closest lot, a pair of pink flamingos had been nail-gunned into a plastic swimming pool—on the off chance they might decide to take flight, Theo guessed. Auggie nosed the car up to the curb, parallel with the flamingos. Then he wiped his eyes. Then he put his hand over his face, and his shoulders shook.
“I’m sorry, Auggie. I shouldn’t have said those things.” He touched Auggie’s arm, and Auggie turned into him, sobbing, and buried his face in Theo’s shoulder. Theo held himself stiffly at first, and then his arms closed around Auggie, pulling him tight, and he strummed his fingers up and down Auggie’s ribs and made quieting noises.
“It’s not that,” Auggie finally said when he pulled away. His eyes were red, and he wiped his face again. “I had this horrible Thanksgiving break, and things are so bad at home, and Fer won’t say it but I know I’m just making his life harder, and Chuy is a mess like Luke, and he’s going to die, and Dylan won’t even acknowledge I’m alive, and you wouldn’t talk to me, and—and I thought I’d wear that dumb outfit and you’d laugh or smile or something, but you were just mad, and things got worse when I tried to sound cool, and then I ended up crying like a huge baby, and I’m tired of being the baby. I’m always the baby.”
In spite of his best efforts, Theo started to laugh.
“Stop it,” Auggie said, jabbing him in the ribs.
Theo laughed harder.
“God, you’re the worst,” Auggie said. He smiled, though. “I haven’t heard you laugh in a long time.”
“I don’t think I’ve laughed in a long time. Let’s do this one by one, shall we?”
“Do what?”
“First, you’re not a baby for crying. My parents fucked me up in a million ways, but that’s not one of them. If you want to cry, cry. If you don’t, don’t.”
“You don’t cry.”
“I’m not exactly a model for how to deal with your problems, Auggie. Second, I’m going to apologize again for being a jerk. I’m sorry, Auggie. I just can’t seem to say anything right around you anymore, but I know I shouldn’t have treated you that way. Will you forgive me?”
“Yeah, duh. And I’m sorry that I’m—you know, I guess I take things the wrong way or too seriously or whatever.”
“Are we ok?”
“Definitely.”
“Ok, number three, Dylan—”
Auggie made the sound of screeching brakes. “Nope.”
“Why not?”
“Umm, gee, well, I don’t know, maybe because I’d rather be hit by a truck and then be chopped up for circus-animal food.”
“You helped me with Cart,” Theo said.
“Please let’s jump over Dylan. I don’t want to talk about him with you.”
“Ok. If you change your mind, I promise I will try to be less of a prick than normal.”
“Wow.”
“I know. It’ll be hard.” Theo grinned, and it felt like a foreign expression after all those months. Then the grin dropped away. “Tell me about Chuy and Fer.”
And Auggie told him—about break, about how things had been getting worse.
“It’s not your fault,” Theo said, “and you can’t carry it. I know you’re going to think it’s easy for me to say, but you’ve got to let it go.”
“Let it go? Theo, he’s my brother, and he’s going to OD one time and nobody will have Narcan, and then he’ll be dead.”
“I’m not saying you can’t love him or care about him or worry about him. But the thing you’ve got to understand about addicts is that they’ll always be addicts, and they’re the only ones who can make the choice to get clean. Fer can bail him out as many times as he wants. You guys can send him to rehab. You could lock him up in a box. I did all of it with Luke. I’m not lying, Auggie. I locked him in the cellar at the end. I thought he was going to have a come-to-Jesus moment. I mean, I’m not a monster—he was comfortable, he had everything he needed. We got through the detox and all the puking. He looked and sounded like Luke again. God, I really thought I’d figured it out. He cried. We both cried. My parents cried. My brothers came by, and they cried. And Luke knew all the right things to say. I opened the door, and he went upstairs, and it was like I had a brother again. That night, he went to bed, and he was still there in the morning. And the next day. And then the third day, I found him in the loft. The dumbshit hadn’t used in weeks, and his tolerance had dropped.”
Auggie was crying again. “That’ll kill Fer. You don’t know him. It’ll kill him.”
“It just about killed me.”
“But I don’t know what to do.”
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you: you can’t do anything. That’s hard to hear, but it’s the truth, and I wish I could tell you something else.”
“Ok,” Auggie said. “Ok, but that doesn’t mean I have to stop trying.”
His cheeks were red. His nose was a little snotty. But his eyes were bright, and there was a hardness in his face, a determination in the way he compressed his lips, that Theo had noticed once or twice before.
“No,” Theo said. “But you’re going to get hurt. That’s probably all you’ll get.”
“If it were Jacob or Abel or Meshie, would you just shrug and say, ‘Eh, I learned my lesson with Luke, I’m going to stay out of this one’?”
Theo shook his head. “But I’m a dumbass hoosier, as Cart likes to point out.”
“You’re not,” Auggie said. “You’re the smartest man I know.”
“Not smart enough,” Theo said with a smile, “to handle my own shit, apparently. Do you want to talk about Fer?”
“There’s nothing to talk about. I’m this huge drain on him: his money, his time, his energy. It’s not fair to him. He’s never gotten to have his own life because he’s spent it taking care of me, and that’s not right, but I’m still making him do it. I’m a fucking adult, but I swipe his credit card when I go out to eat, I send the tuition bills to his house, I drive a car he paid for.”
Something kicked on in the car, and a belt in the Civic whined in agreement.
“You know, there are a lot of ways to do college on your own,” Theo said carefully. “I’m trying really hard not to dad out on you, but there are scholarships, student loans.” Then, testing the ice, “You could get a job.”
Auggie flopped back in the seat, arms and legs akimbo, and groaned. “Oh my God, you’re going to make me work at Frozen King, and I’ll have to wear one of those paper crowns.”
“That’s not the worst option.”
“I’d honestly rather be dead.”
Theo caught himself before responding to that. The whumping sound in the Civic had gotten louder, even though they were still parked, and the smell of something burning was filling the car.
“Auggie, I think you might need a mechanic to look at this. Don’t be mad.”
Sitting up, Auggie grinned and shifted into drive. “You don’t have to say, ‘Don’t be mad,’ after everything. And it’s fine; the car always makes the smell.”
“Ok, but in my experience, dealing with anything like this early on is better than waiting until it’s too late—”
“Dad,” Auggie coughed into his fist.
Sighing, Theo sat back and raised his hands, silent. Then he glanced at his watch. “Shit, when was Sadie supposed to leave her house? I know you said we had to hurry.”
“Oh, um. I kind of made that up.”
Theo let the tires thrum for a moment.
“Just the part about her leaving her house,” Auggie said in a rush. “Because you were so mad at me, and I thought if we could start working together again, maybe you’d forget about being mad.” Hesitating, Auggie offered a weak smile. “Don’t be mad.”
After the Civic had limped another mile, Theo trusted his voice enough to say, “Why don’t you tell me how you found her and why you think she’s Cal’s dealer?”
“Oh, that was easy once Chuy explained how it works. It’s all about knowing the right person, which I kind of knew, but I didn’t realize you had to, um, know them. Like, I thought it’d be the way I do stuff, where you can connect online, but I guess drug dealing is still stuck back with the dinosaurs.”
“God,” Theo said, “how awful.”
“Right? Anyway, I did get Orlando to talk to his parents, and they let me sign into Cal’s account on Facebook—they have access to his account now. I just worked my way through his pictures, checked it against his friends, made a list of everyone who I could see partying in the pictures or who bragged about partying in their feed. Then I took that list and ran it through Missouri’s online court records. Lots of them had some sort of criminal record, but Sadie was the only one who’d been busted for possession with intent to distribute, so I decided to start with her.”
When Theo had digested this, he said, “That’s amazing.”
Auggie’s shoulders relaxed, his chest came up, and he smiled.
“So she doesn’t know we’re coming?”
Shaking his head, Auggie said, “I thought it’d be best if we took her by surprise.”
“And what were you going to do if I refused to go with you?”
“I’m going to spare you the embarrassment of pretending that was a real question.”
When they got to the house, it looked like yet another of the 1950s-era homes that had weathered the intervening decades without much assistance. The asphalt shingles were hairy and green with algae, and in many places the shingles were missing, and the tarpaper underneath looked waterlogged and saggy. More of the same green algae stained the siding, which had once been white. Several tall trees shaded the house, and the grass had killed the lawn and left bare earth and patches of moss. When Auggie stopped the Civic, the breeze that rushed into the car through the open window was cold and smelled like half-frozen soil. Theo buttoned his flannel shirt again, then stopped when he saw Auggie shivering and tugging on his tee.
“Here,” Theo said, shrugging out of the flannel.
“No, I’m fine. I just—it was a lot warmer at home, and then it felt like a nice day at the Sigma Sigma house. I should have—”
“Auggie, for the love of Christ, take it. I’m fine. I didn’t just fly in from the land of milk and honey and board shorts.”
Murmuring something, Auggie pulled on the flannel. It was too big for him, and he cuffed the sleeves, but as usual, somehow he made it look good.
“What was that?” Theo said.
“Nothing,” Auggie said with a sugary smile. “Just remembering your deep, unrequited love for California.”
Theo grunted and opened the door.
“Theo?”
When he looked back, he was unsurprised to see Auggie’s eyes were wet again. “Just, thanks.” Auggie plucked at the flannel and added, “For everything.”
“Will you please stay in the car until I tell you to come up to the house?” Theo raised his hands. “I’m not going to cut you out of this. You found her. But I want to check something first.”
Auggie nodded. Apparently being the single most difficult part of Theo’s life more than a dozen times in one day was exhausting; he slumped back in the seat, chewing the placket of the flannel shirt, face already lost in thought.
Instead of approaching the house directly, Theo followed the sidewalk to one end of the lot, and then he doubled back and followed it in the other direction. A few cars passed him, but the yards and sidewalks were empty; it was mid-afternoon, and most people were either at work or school. The sun moved behind clouds as Theo turned back for his third trip along the sidewalk, and goosebumps tightened the flesh on his arms when that wet, frozen-moss breeze picked up again.
On his three passes, Theo got good, long looks inside Sadie’s house. The windows didn’t have blinds or curtains, and he could see into a bedroom and the living room. A girl with short, dark hair sat on the couch watching TV. She was eating something out of a bowl, and she was wearing pajama pants and a tank top. Maybe she could borrow Slutbreaker, Theo thought, and he grinned at the indignation he imagined on Auggie’s face.
At the end of the lot, Theo turned and followed the property line, which was marked by a four-foot section of chain fence, the rest having either been ripped out at some point or never been installed. He passed a massive linden tree. Its berries carpeted the ground, most of them black and withered, some of them squishing under Theo’s boots with a slight whiff of rotten fruit. A tiny window marked this side of the house—the bathroom, Theo thought. The glass was frosted, so he couldn’t see inside, but it was dark. He assumed that meant it was unoccupied. The backyard was even worse than the front—big branches had fallen in several places, and a stake and a rusting chain marked where some poor animal had been kept at one point. Theo stretched up to peer into the kitchen on the other side of the glass. Nobody there either. He made his way back to the car and rapped on the trunk. When Auggie opened it, he took out the tire iron and carried it to the passenger window.
Auggie was chewing on the collar now; Theo was starting to think he’d need to buy puppy spray.
“I think she’s alone,” Theo said. “I want you to play nice at the front door. Be newspaper-subscription Auggie or door-to-door-vacuum-sales Auggie.”
“Gross. That sounds like work.”
“You just need to keep her occupied.”
“Yeah, but newspapers? It’s not the 90s, Theo. I might as well offer to sell her a Jurassic Park t-shirt and a Fraggle Rock nightlight.” Auggie’s eyes widened when Theo pointed the tire iron at him, and he hurried to say, “You know what? Newspaper subscription was a great idea. You’re so smart.”
“Too late.”
“And strong. Look at those guns you’re flexing.”
“Just keep her talking, please.”
“And wise,” Auggie called after him. “You’re so wise, Theo. Because of your years of life experience.”
Theo walked faster. At the back of the house, he grabbed a rock. Then he went up the three rotted-out steps to the back door and slid the end of the tire iron between the door and the jamb, right where the latch was set. When he heard Auggie’s voice at the front of the house, he hammered on the end of the iron with the rock, forcing the door a fraction of an inch to the side. The latch popped free of the jamb, and the door swung inwards. Discarding the rock, Theo went inside and adjusted his grip on the tire iron.
“Bitch, I told you,” Sadie was saying, her voice deeper than Theo had expected, “I don’t care if your car died. Walk to a fucking gas station.”
“My brother will pay you,” Auggie said. “Come on, I don’t want to walk. I just got these Jordans.”
“Fuck off,” Sadie said.
Theo took the last two yards at a sprint, crossing the spearmint-colored shag carpeting as Sadie reached for the door. He was as quiet as possible, but she must have heard something because she started to turn. He got the end of the tire iron between two ribs and said, “Uh uh.”
She froze.
“Hands up. This is long enough to go all the way to your heart.”
Sadie raised her hands, and her tank top slid up.
“Come inside,” Theo said to Auggie. “Shut the door. Then go get a chair from the kitchen and put it in the middle of the living room.”
Sadie smelled like milk and body odor, and her hair was lank, barely longer than Auggie’s but looking greasy and unwashed. The tank top revealed a scattering of acne on her back and shoulders.
“You guys are fucked,” she said with a tight laugh. “You guys have no idea who you’re fucking with.”
“When I want you to talk, I’ll tell you.”
“You think you can bust my stash and walk away from it? You motherfuckers are dead. Dead. When—”
Theo caught a handful of her hair and smashed her face against the door. The movement took her by surprise, and she never had a chance to resist. He was pretty sure he heard her nose break.
“I got a chair,” Auggie said, “what do I—Jesus, what happened?”
Still steering her by the hair, Theo propelled Sadie toward the straight-backed chair that Auggie had set in the middle of the room. “Go find something to tie her with,” Theo said.
“I don’t—”
“Now,” Theo shouted.
Auggie ran into the bedroom.
Staring up at Theo, her nose flattened and misshapen, blood covering her mouth and chin, Sadie said, “You are a fucking dead man.”
“I’ve heard it before,” Theo said. “Be quiet.”
“It’s not me. It’s my boss. And his boss. And his boss.”
“Yeah, the Ozark Volunteers, every goddamn one of them jerking off with his sister. I know. Shut up.”
Auggie came back with a belt and a bedsheet.
“She doesn’t have anything—”
“The belt is fine. Pull her arms back, put it above the elbows, and get it as tight as you can.”
“I thought we were just going to talk to her.”
“I know what you thought. I tried to tell you, this is serious shit. Tie her up.”
“They’re going to cut off your fucking face,” Sadie said, blood bubbling at her nose. “I’m going to watch them, and then I’m going to take a shit on you.” She looked like she was thinking about struggling, but that stopped when Theo put the tire iron’s tip to her throat. Auggie secured the belt, and then he stepped back, his hands out to the side like they were dirty and he didn’t want to touch anything.
“Go outside now,” Theo said.
“No.”
Theo’s gaze shifted to his face: the soft, dark brown eyes, the worried crinkles around his mouth. “Please go wait outside.”
“I can do this.”
After a moment, Theo nodded. “Watch her.” He made his way into the kitchen and did a quick search, throwing open cabinets, the oven, the warming drawer. He found the first stash when he lifted the range cover: dozens of baggies, already filled with crystal and ready for sale. He found kilo bags taped to the back of the sink. A box of Wheaties had more of the baggies.
“Stay the fuck out of my shit!” Sadie screamed from the other room.
When Theo went back to the living room, Auggie was pale and sweating, hands tucked under his arms. Theo touched his back lightly, and Auggie flinched. Then Theo sat on the couch facing Sadie.
“Every time you refuse to answer one of my questions,” Theo said, “I’m going to take one of your baggies. Do you understand?”
“Fuck you.”
“Go get one of the little ones,” he said to Auggie.
Auggie’s steps squeaked when he reached the linoleum.
“You fucking pieces of shit,” Sadie screamed, thrashing in the chair, kicking wildly. Theo was just out of reach, but she kept trying. “I will fucking kill you!”
“Do you understand?”
“My boss is going to spend days on you. Days. He’s going to take you apart.”
“Take one of the medium ones,” Theo said. Then, to Sadie, he added, “Next time, it’s a kilo because you’re pissing me off. Do you understand?”
Sadie stared at him. When Theo opened his mouth, she screamed, “Yes, God damn it!” She was taking huge, uncontrolled breaths, and a blood bubble at her nostril inflated and shrank wildly. “Yes, I fucking understand!”
“Here’s the thing about drug dealers: you’re all so fucking suspicious of each other.” Theo let a silent moment expand. “That’s because you’re all pieces of shit, of course. About the foulest, most disgusting shit on the planet. So in case you’re having a hard time understanding how everything is going to play out—drug dealers are also notoriously fucking stupid, which I’m assuming is true for you too—I’ll explain it. You’re already short because I took some of your stash. That means you’re going to have to make up the difference yourself when the middleman shows up to collect. If you’re lucky, you either paid in advance or you’ve got some money saved up, but I don’t think that’s the case here. So you’ll have to cover the money from selling the rest of this shit. If you’re careful, I think you’ll be fine. But if I take a kilo, boy, that’s going to be really hard to cover. And even harder to explain. What are you going to tell him? You got robbed? Maybe he believes you. Maybe not. Either way, you’re no fucking use to him.” Theo took another breath. “We’re going to have a talk. Then we’re going to leave with—God, for your sake—I really hope no more than two baggies. And you’re not going to tell anyone, and that’ll be the end of it. Am I clear?”
She jerked her head once in a nod.
“Tell me about Cal.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“All right,” Theo said with a sigh. “That’s a kilo.”
“No, fuck, no. I just don’t know what you mean.”
“Specificity,” Auggie said from the kitchen opening. “Take a breath.”
It was a moment before Theo realized Auggie was talking to him, and then, as though he were seeing himself from the outside, he was aware of the haze of rage and fear that was making it difficult to think, that was forcing him to breathe in rapid, gulping swallows. He took a few deep breaths and met Sadie’s gaze again.
“Did you sell to Cal?”
“Cal Reese? The sports guy?”
“That’s the one.”
Another of those jerky nods.
“When was the last time you saw him?”
“I don’t know, man. He’s been dead forever. It was a long time ago.”
“Did you kill him?”
“What? Fuck no. I heard they found him out at the rest stop.”
“Was he out there buying drugs?”
“Damn, man. I don’t know. He could get whatever he wanted from me. He was fun to party with. If he was out there to buy, nobody’s talking about it.”
Theo tried to gauge her sincerity. “So you don’t know who killed him? You don’t have any idea?”
“No. Who the fuck do you think I am? I sell crystal. I party. This isn’t some Breaking Bad-style shit.”
“Think really hard,” Theo said. “How long was it between when you sold to Cal and you found out he was dead? A long time? A short time?”
“You broke my nose, fucker. Holy shit. That’s really starting to hurt.”
“You want me to take another bag?”
“I don’t know! I told you, I don’t know. I don’t remember. Sometimes he scored every week. Sometimes more. Sometimes less. It was months ago, man.”
Theo glanced at Auggie.
“Who might have wanted to hurt Cal?” Auggie asked. “Did he ever talk about what was going on in his life? Problems he might be having?”
“Oh, sure. We braided each other’s hair and I told him how Missy’s mom had gotten fake titties and he told me he kissed Polly under the swing set.” To Theo, she added, “You probably shouldn’t bring your baby out to play with the big kids. Not until his balls drop, anyway.”
For a moment, the rage that twisted Auggie’s face made Theo forget everything else. It was a degree of anger that was totally out of proportion to the comment. Then it was gone, but Auggie’s cheeks were flushed, his dark eyes wide and the pupils huge.
“Just for that,” Theo said, “you can get that belt off yourself. Come on.”
Still carrying the baggies, Auggie followed him out of the house.
They drove a zigzag of blocks until Theo said, “Stop here.”
Auggie stopped the car and glanced over his shoulder. “Do you think she’s—”
“Give me those.”
“What?”
“Give me those baggies.”
The hesitation was worse than the words. “Theo, I’m trying to tread really lightly here, but you’ve got a history of—”
“I’m not going to keep them, dummy. But I don’t want you keeping them either. I’m going to dump them down the storm drain.”
“Great,” Auggie said. “We can do it together.” He shifted the car into park, got out, and walked to the storm drain.
Theo swore. Then, yanking on the handle, he opened the door and got out. When he got to the storm drain, Auggie displayed the two baggies and emptied them both down the drain. Then he displayed the empty bags.
“Those too.”
Auggie tossed them.
“Relieved?” Theo said. “I barely managed to resist the urge to light up a pipe and smoke them right here.”
“You can be mad at me if you want,” Auggie said. “I’m used to it by now.”
“I’m not an addict, Auggie. I made a mistake. I took a pill for my knee and thought I could handle a beer on top of it. I learned my lesson.” He blew out a breath. “And I don’t even think I thanked you for, you know, helping me.”
“You puked a ton.”
Theo winced.
“And you scared me.”
“I’m sorry. That was months ago, though. I’m fine.”
“Yeah,” Auggie said, and for some reason he looked tired. “Let’s just go.”
They drove through the rundown neighborhood, taking different streets this time, looping back toward campus by a route that took almost twice the time it should have. The Civic’s whining had taken on a new intensity, and something heavy was clunking rhythmically under the hood. The burned smell was worse than ever. Theo fought the need to say something; whatever peace they had established was tenuous, and he didn’t need Auggie biting his head off again for an innocent observation about preventative maintenance.
Instead of heading for the Sigma Sigma house, though, Auggie kept going west to the little street at the edge of the city limits. They pulled up in front of Theo’s garage—now that it was relatively empty, Theo had moved the Malibu inside. As they rolled up onto the driveway, the Civic released a shrieking hiss, and something—steam or smoke—boiled up from under the hood.
“Shit,” Auggie said, stomping on the brakes. “Shit, shit, shit.”
The car coasted to a stop and died.
“Shit,” Auggie moaned, dropping his head onto the steering wheel. “There is no way this is happening.”
Fanning the air, Theo said, “Let’s get out and take a look. I’ll call Cart; he’s good with cars.”
“No, it’s fine, I’ll get a tow truck out here.”
Theo elbowed open the door. “It’s your choice, but Cart’s great at this kind of stuff, and—”
A brown Ford sedan was pulling up at the end of the driveway, blocking them in. Behind the wheel, Theo recognized a familiar face, complete with huge glasses and bristly mustache.
Theo slapped his keys into Auggie’s hands. “Go inside. Right now.”
Auggie was staring at him.
“Run!”
But it was too late. Albert Lender, detective for the Wahredua PD, was already out of his car. He wore a cheap suit that was the exact same color as his sedan. The glasses, with their enormous plastic frames, conspired with the mustache to hide most of his face. At first glance, he probably made most people think of a dentist or a tax accountant: short and squirrelly, harmless. In reality, though, the opposite was true. He was corrupt, he was ruthless, and he was perhaps the most dangerous man Theo knew.
“Hello, Theo,” Lender said. “Is that August in there with you? Wonderful. I had a feeling I’d catch the two of you together. Let’s go inside and have a talk.”
My boss, Sadie had said. And his boss. And his boss. Theo had made a mistake. Theo had assumed she’d be too afraid to report their theft. But her fear of the men she worked for had trumped the other fear, it seemed.
“Auggie was just about to walk home,” Theo said. He was still sitting in the car, the passenger door propped open. He wouldn’t be able to put any force behind a blow. He wouldn’t be able to surprise Lender with speed. “Car trouble.”
“Walk home?” Lender clucked his tongue. “I don’t think so, young man. No sidewalks out here. Something nasty could happen. Something really nasty. Walking on the shoulder of the road like that, he could get clipped by a car.” Smiling, Lender put his hands on his hips, pushing back the jacket just enough to display his holstered gun. “You know, once, I saw this fellow run over a rabbit. Did it on purpose, out of plain meanness, I guess. He was driving a nice little sedan like mine. But he didn’t stop there. He backed up and did it again. Went back and forth over that thing until it looked like he’d painted it on the asphalt with a roller brush. What do you think about that?”
“Theo?” Auggie whispered.
“It’ll be ok,” Theo said. His hand slid across the Civic’s console, found Auggie’s, and squeezed. He kept his gaze fixed on Lender. “Maybe he should wait here, then. He can wait for a tow truck.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Lender said. “Car jackings, you know. Sometimes they walk right up to the glass. Shoot you before you even know they’re there.” He tapped on the rear window with one chewed nail. Tap. Tap. Tap. “Hell of a mess.”
Theo nodded. “Come on,” he said to Auggie.
Auggie clutched his hand fiercely for a final instant before they got out of the car. They made their way up to the porch, with Lender following a safe distance behind, and Auggie tried to unlock the door. He dropped the keys twice because his hands were shaking. On the third try, Theo put his hand at the small of Auggie’s back.
“You’re going to be ok,” Theo whispered. “You’re smart and strong and brave, and you’re going to get through this.”
After a deep breath, Auggie nodded. He slid the key into the lock, and they went inside.
Lender kicked the door shut behind him. He looked around. “Well, Theo, you’ve really done a number getting this place looking so good. I expect that’s thanks to Officer Cartwright as well. He’s really a man of many talents, isn’t he? I understand the two of you have become very close friends.”
“What do you want?” Theo said.
“Well, Theo, August, I have a problem. And the problem is, I am what you might call an investor. And for the most part, I like to be a silent partner in this little business. It’s something extra that I set aside for retirement, you understand, and I don’t have time for the day-to-day operations. But every once in a while, I get a call, and I have to handle something. That’s ok. I understand. That’s what being a partner is all about. You’ve got to do some of the unpleasant stuff.” A smile lifted his mustache. “Paperwork, for example. God, I hate paperwork.”
“Paperwork,” Auggie said, and then he laughed shrilly.
Theo found his wrist blindly and clamped down, and Auggie’s laughter cut off with a wet noise that sounded suspiciously like a sob.
“And today, boy, I’ve got a hell of a mess of paperwork to sort out. Somebody assaulted an employee. A low-level employee, but you know, we’re something of a family. And somebody stole some merchandise.”
“We can pay—”
“The money isn’t really the thing, Theo. You’re missing the point. The point is paperwork. The point is that certain things need to be communicated. Now, I happen to know the little devils who caused all this mischief. When my partners called and told me that these rascals were asking questions, told me about two young men causing a world of trouble, I knew immediately who they were. And I offered to take care of things. Because, you know, I’ve got a bit of affection for these young men. Not paternal. What’s the word? More like an uncle.”
“Avuncular,” Auggie said. He cleared his throat. “You mean avuncular.”
“That’s right, August. Very good.” Lender fished a pair of handcuffs from his belt and tossed them to Theo. Theo caught them by reflex. “Put those on, Theo.”
“No,” Auggie said.
“August, be quiet. Today, you’re going to sit and watch while Theo and I fill out some paperwork. Next time—if there is a next time—Theo will sit and watch, and you and I will work on the forms together. Theo, the handcuffs, please.”
“No,” Auggie said. “No, Theo, don’t. Mr. Lender, we didn’t know you were involved in this. We wouldn’t have messed up your business if we’d known. It’s a big misunderstanding. Please, we’ll—”
“August, August, goodness. Calm down, please. There’s nothing personal here; this is business. And the sooner done, the better.”
The first cuff snicked shut around Theo’s wrist.
“Behind your back, Theo.”
He clicked the second cuff shut, his arms now pinioned. “Auggie, go sit on the couch. He’s going to sit down; you said this is just about you and me.”
But Auggie didn’t budge.
“Very well, August,” Lender said. “You can stay there if you like. But if you interfere, well—” Lender tapped the holster. Without any apparent concern, he turned his back on Theo and Auggie and walked to the coat rack near the door. He seemed to consider something for a moment. Then he snagged the cane Theo had used after the accident. It was solid hickory, and it could do a lot of damage. Theo knew because he’d been beaten with it before.
“Please don’t hurt him,” Auggie was saying, his voice choked with tears. Theo couldn’t bring himself to look at Auggie’s face; whatever was there would undo him. “Please. Please don’t do this.”
“Now, Theo,” Lender said, swishing the cane through the air. It whistled. The sound raised the hair on the back of Theo’s neck. “Remind me: which knee did you injure in your accident?”
Theo’s throat locked up. He thought of the surgeries. The weeks and months of PT. The agony in simple things like hobbling to the fridge, struggling to keep his balance while he took a leak.
“This one,” Lender pointed with the cane. “Correct?”
“No,” Auggie said.
“I have to admit it’s been a long time since I took an English class, but using your cane to cripple you—that’s a kind of irony, right?”
“No,” Auggie said, louder.
Theo managed to say, “Situational irony.”
“Ah, that’s it. You’re so clever. And I am very sorry about this. I’ll make it as fast as I can.”
Lender brought the cane up and to the side.
Auggie jumped in front of Theo.
For the first time, annoyance flashed on Lender’s face. “August, get out of the way.”
“Move,” Theo said. “Auggie, for the love of Christ, move.”
“Not his knee,” Auggie said. “Please. You don’t know how hard that was for him.”
“I’m losing patience, August.”
“You can break my knee instead.”
“No,” Theo shouted. With his hands cuffed behind his back, he couldn’t do what he needed to do: grab Auggie, shield him, get him away from all of this. All he could do was try to force his way forward. Auggie didn’t even let him do that; with one hand, Auggie reached back and shoved Theo onto his ass, and Theo sat there, stunned, staring up at him.
“It doesn’t matter which one,” Auggie said. Theo was sitting slightly to the side, and he could see the weak smile that came onto Auggie’s face. “Dealer’s choice.”
“Well, August, this is really very touching. I hope Theo realizes how lucky he is to have a friend like you.”
“No,” Theo screamed, his heels scraping across the floor as he tried to get up. “Lender, you motherfucker, don’t you dare do this.”
“And,” Lender added with a wink, “I hope Officer Cartwright knows he has some stiff competition.”
“Let me just—” Auggie said.
The first blow came so quickly and suddenly that Theo’s warning scream cut off. The cane caught Auggie just below the shoulder, and Auggie shouted, the sound a mixture of pain and surprise. The next blow was almost as fast, landing just a few inches lower. Then another. The flurry of blows created a kind of humming noise, the pitch rising and falling, punctuated only by Auggie’s shouts, then his screams. Somewhere between the fourth and fifth blow, Auggie fell. He tried to crawl, and Lender came after him, whipping him with the cane.
That was when Theo charged. He’d gotten to his feet; he wasn’t sure how. He only knew he was going to kill Albert Lender, even if it meant tearing out his throat with his teeth. Lender heard him coming, straightened, turned, wiped sweat from his forehead. He jabbed Theo in the throat with the cane, and Theo went down, puking and gagging, almost aspirating some of the vomit and coughing even harder. For a while, that was all Theo could focus on: trying to clear his lungs and get air. His face was hot and wet, the taste of bile in his mouth, when he realized the sounds had stopped. Almost. Lender’s labored breathing seemed to fill the room.
Then the cane fell, clattering against the floorboards. Lender’s steps moved toward Theo.
“I’m going to kill you,” Theo said, trying to rise from the puddle of his own sick.
“Just so we’re clear, my partners and I had nothing to do with Calvin Reese’s death. My suggestion is that this should be a natural endpoint to your investigation.”
Theo tried to rise, but Lender kicked him once in the side of the head, and the world scrambled. When Theo came back, his wrists were free, and Lender was speaking.
“—boys have a wonderful Christmas. I know we’re supposed to say holidays, but I’m old fashioned that way. And August, make sure you study. I expect you to get those straight A’s again.”
Then the door clicked shut, and Theo slid through his own vomit toward Auggie.