Peopled with Echoes
Kilmartin Glen, Scotland
I feel useless.” As the two men walked past Dunchraigaig Cairn, Estrada glanced into the dark, narrow void. This was where they’d found the body of that Glasgow journalist Dylan had been accused of murdering last summer. He wondered again what his life would have been like if that event had never occurred. Would he have met Sorcha O’Hallorhan? And if he’d never worked with the archaeologist to free Dylan from prison, would he be walking here with Conall today? Or waiting for Magus Dubh to come home so he could save Michael from himself. All the events of his life seemed connected by a fragile spider’s web that could easily break if one frail thread collapsed or stuck to another during a harsh wind or had never been spun at all. And Dylan was one of those threads. A loyal friend who’d chosen to stay in the past because he’d fallen in love with the blacksmith’s daughter.
“You are many things, but useless isn’t one of them.” Conall’s hand slipped inside his as they walked, and Estrada felt his strength double with that of the bard’s.
In this new world, Conall wore a cloak of innocence and Estrada was so determined to protect him, he sometimes forgot that the bard was a warrior. “I’ve killed thirty-three men in my life,” he’d said after they rode through the wormhole. “Today, I killed three. And her.” Ana, the Crow Queen who’d tortured and executed Ruairí Mac Nia. Conall was a soldier but also the gentlest and most sensitive of men. That was why he needed protecting.
“Your rituals may flatter the Horned God, but he will come without them,” Conall continued. “He will come because you call him with a pure heart.” As they turned down the grassy avenue and the Standing Stones appeared, the bard chuckled. “But just to be safe, I will summon him with my song.” He stroked the leather bag slung across his shoulder that housed his pipes.
“You know, Cernunnos is a lusty fertility god.”
“Aye, and I long to meet him.”
“What if you crossed through the worm hole accidentally and he demands you return to your own time?”
Conall scoffed. “I am not afraid. Are you?”
Estrada squeezed his hand. “My only fear is that one day the Horned God won’t answer my call.”
Long afternoon shadows stretched across the pasture beneath the two parallel lines of Standing Stones. Conall laid his hand on one stone in the line of four and traced the cup and ring marks with his fingers. Then he put his ear to the stone and listened. “There are such stones in my land. Do you hear? They are singing ritual songs.”
“That’s gotta be a good sign.” Conall’s attunement to nature amazed Estrada. He leaned back against one of the center stones and though he couldn’t hear their song, their strength and the sun’s warmth relaxed his mind. “I’m going to cast a circle around us. If you’re sure you want to do this, come stand beside me.”
Conall joined him, then removed his pipes from their leather case and played a melodious lament that sent rushes up Estrada’s limbs. He grounded himself and began to breathe slow, deep, even breaths. In and out. In and out. As he watched his breath, he felt the Earth’s heat rise through the soles of his feet. Using his breath, he drew the energy up his legs and through his chakras, then passed it down his arms into his hands. As he raised his right hand, he felt the first fiery sparks dapple his palms. He held up his pointer finger and smiled as a flame burst from the tip. This fire magic had taken him by surprise in Croghan, and he loved being able to summon it. Was it a gift from Cernunnos? Perhaps. The horned god loved fire and seemed to love him too.
As he swept his arm in a slow circular motion, he drew a large circle around them. Conall continued to play as Estrada spoke the sacred chant.
I conjure containment within this place
Thrice do I conjure the sacred divine
Powerful goodness and mystery mine
From the east to the west,
From the south to the north
I cast this circle and call magic forth.”
The dancing flames filled him with courage.
“I call on the Ancient Horned God, Cernunnos.” He repeated this three times, then ended with, “I need you, man. Please come.”
Though rooted to the ground, Estrada felt his spirit expand within the circle. And when the Horned God appeared, it was instantaneous. No fire or spectacle, as was his usual style. He was just there, as if he’d been waiting for his summons, faint at first, and then as solid as human flesh.
Conall paused his playing and watched Cernunnos prance about on his cloven hooves, his body naked save a scant hide skin askew his hips that showed the hard length of his sex. His shoulders were broad, his chest a mass of muscles. As always, Estrada grew mesmerized by the full rack of antlers atop his head and those dark-lined, deep brown eyes. It surprised him to realize how much he’d missed these moments with Cernunnos.
“Shaman. You call upon me, again.”
“Yes. I need your help. I must return to Iron Age Croghan. I need—”
“Did I not just bring you back?“ The god scoffed. “Do you think I am an Uber?”
Estrada chuckled. Cernunnos spent more time wandering around this modern world than he was prepared to admit. “You are the most powerful god I know, but I think we made a mistake when we—”
“A mistake?” The god snorted when he laughed. “To which mistake do you refer?” He pranced around Conall, inhaling and rolling his eyes, acting as if he were enamored by the bard.
When Estrada saw Conall tense, he sent him a look that said, just breathe and stay calm. He needed the god’s full attention and his blessing.
“Dylan McBride. He stayed in Croghan, and now I can find no trace of him or his family here in Tarbert, where his grandfather lived all his life.”
Cernunnos grunted. “Did I not warn you about changing history?”
“You did, but—”
“Now do you understand that all sentient beings are interconnected in this web? That you cannot remove one without changing the dynamic of the whole?”
Estrada didn’t need that reminder. “But if Dylan comes back—”
“How many times do you think you can slip between correcting your mistakes?”
“Just this once. After that, I won’t ask again.” Estrada crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the warm stone. He hated having to beg, but would do whatever was necessary. “Please, Cernunnos, take me back. I’ll convince Dylan to return with me and we’ll make things right.”
The god sashayed forward and laid his head upon Estrada’s shoulder. His dark purple lips fell into a pout. As he tilted his handsome face to stare into Estrada’s eyes, the magician felt a burst of heat through his core as hot as the fire surrounding them. “What do you offer in recompense?” he said, his voice rasping like sand over rock.
“A kiss?” Once, they’d shared a kiss like no other.
Cernunnos scoffed. “Kisses are crumbs to my hungry heart. I will come for you, and I will have my loaf.”
Estrada stiffened. When he’d come for Sorcha at Beltane, they’d spent three days and nights together in Iron Age Croghan. That’s how this whole thing started.
“If you choose to give it.” With one claw, Cernunnos turned Estrada’s face. “I am here, not to take from you, shaman, but to give.” As a pulsing finger caressed his lips and ran down his stubbled chin, Estrada couldn’t help but become aroused.
“If I need you again, will you come? I’m going after Diego—”
The god stepped back, eyes narrowing. “Bah. That vampire is nothing to me.”
“But he’s something to me. Diego can best me. He’s stronger and faster.”
“Shaman! Still, you doubt your power!”
“But will you come if I need you?”
“If you call, I will come. I will always come.” One corner of his lip pulled up into a grin. “We’ll discuss the state of your bakery then.” The god collapsed on the grass in a fit of laughter.
Estrada released a breath and smiled. “I’m glad I amuse you, Cernunnos.”
“You do more than amuse me.” He huffed a low growl. “For years, I’ve watched you play me in your rituals. I’m flattered by your devotion.”
Estrada cleared his throat and glanced at Conall, who still hadn’t spoken a word. They needed to get moving before some farmer wandered into the sheep pasture with his border collie. “Can you take us to a specific time and place in Croghan?”
“Think, and it will be so.”
“We must arrive after Ana is dead, but not so long after that Dylan has a family. I couldn’t separate him from his children. That wouldn’t be right.” Estrada closed his eyes and imagined himself in the forest behind the blacksmith’s home.
When he opened them, Cernunnos stood before him. His antlers were gone and nut-brown hair framed his angular face in waves. He rested his palms on Estrada’s shoulders, then leaned forward until their foreheads touched. The breath from his lips tickled as he spoke, and Estrada inhaled the faint aroma of cinnamon.
Estrada stepped back, blinked, and blinked again. The stones and pasture had disappeared, and they stood in a verdant forest in a cool rain as fine as mist. He looked around. “Where’s Conall?”
“I brought us to Croghan as you requested.” He’d lost his godly guise and wore the same leather breeches, linen shirt, and long coat that Estrada wore—though his coat was royal purple, and Estrada’s scarlet as before. A black woolen cloak hung from his shoulders. “The bard awaits your return. And I am here to ensure you make no more mistakes.”
As he rubbed the stubble on his chin, Estrada heard rushing water, and knew intrinsically it was the stream that ran through the ravine behind the blacksmith’s home. “It’s this way,” he said.
When they walked around the corner of the barn, he was surprised to see the yard full of people laughing, eating, and talking. And his heart swelled to see such happiness after the trauma they’d experienced here. He saw Manus carrying one boy on his shoulders at the same time as the blacksmith saw him. Manus waved, then came to meet him.
“You’ve returned to us. We prayed you would.”
“Why the party?” Estrada asked.
The blacksmith’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “Dylan and Máire wed this morning. Is that not why you’re here?”
Estrada glanced at Cernunnos to gauge his reaction, but the god stood poker-faced. How was he going to talk Dylan into leaving now? He didn’t have a problem bringing Máire into the future, but surely Cernunnos would consider that another mistake.
“Where is Dylan? We must congratulate him.”
As if he sensed their presence, Dylan looked up from where he stood amid the crowd and, seeing Estrada, ran to him and threw his arms around him. “You came! I was thinking of you, and you came! When we married this morning, I kept thinking, Estrada should be here as my best man, and now here you are.”
Magic was as simple as it was complex. “Congratulations, man.”
“But that’s not why you’re here, is it? I can see it in your eyes and—” He turned and stared at Cernunnos. “Is that who I think it is?”
“Indeed, it is. Can we talk alone?”
The music started, and Cernunnos danced off through the crowd, flirting with the young girls.
“If he’s here, this can’t be good,” Dylan said as the two men wandered down by the stream.
“Dylan, I went to Tarbert this morning like I said I would.”
“Oh, aye. Was my granddad upset? I thought he’d understand. He always told me stories about our McBride ancestors, about how we fought the English. He loves history and—”
“Dermot wasn’t there. Another family lives in his house and they’d never heard of the McBrides.”
“Ach, you must have gone to the wrong house.”
“Dylan, listen. I lived at Piper’s Dream with your granddad last summer. I know the place.”
Dylan sat down hard on a boulder beside the river. “But how can that be?”
“We fucked up, man. The woman has lived there for six years. And she’s never heard of the McBrides. She knew nothing about your arrest, and in a village the size of Tarbert—”
“Everyone knew.” Dylan shook his head.
“Somehow, you staying here has affected everything there. It’s like you and your grandfather never existed. I don’t know how this time-travel thing works, but if you stay here . . .”
“What are you saying? You want me to go back? I can’t, man. Máire and I are bound. I can’t leave her. I won’t.” Dylan pressed his temples. “We don’t exist?”
Estrada took a deep breath. “Look. I know you just got married but—”
“But nothing.” Dylan stood and planted his feet on the ground, hands on hips. He’d gone into warrior mode. “Don’t make me choose between you and her. If you do, I’ll never forgive you.”
When Estrada reached out and grasped Dylan’s shoulder, he felt his body tremble from the inside out. He decided to try a different tack. “Let me tell you the whole story.” Estrada cleared his throat. “Conall came through the wormhole with me and Sorcha. He’s waiting for me back at the Ballymeanoch Stones.”
Dylan stood up straighter. “What—? What did Cernunnos say about that? Surely that will change history.”
“He hasn’t said anything and, as you once noted, that rule is pretty much fucked.”
Dylan’s snort eased the tension. “What were you doing at Ballymeanoch?”
“We went to Sorcha’s camp and then to see your granddad. That’s when I found out. Dylan, please. If you don’t come back, I’m afraid other things will go wrong. Some already have. When we went to Glasgow to get Dubh, he wasn’t there. Things are off kilter. And without your brain, I’ll never figure out how to take down Diego.”
“The vampire? But we already destroyed that bastard.”
“No. Cernunnos took us back through the wormhole on summer solstice. Michael is still alive.”
“What? No way.” Dylan crashed down hard in the grass. “So Cernunnos told you not to change history and then set you up to change it. What kind of game is he playin?”
Estrada shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s a god. He does what he wants. But Dylan. He gave me a second chance. And now I’ve got less than five weeks to destroy Diego and his horde before they kidnap Lucy.”
“You’re going after him, aren’t you?”
“They’re murderers, Dylan. Pure evil. And you know Diego’s been stalking me all year. If I don’t come for him, he’ll come for me. This is a preemptive strike.”
Dylan grasped his bearded jaw with both hands. “Ach, this is crazy.”
“Not any crazier than what happened out there on the coast or what happened here.” Estrada crouched beside Dylan. “I need you, man. Will you please come home?” He held his breath.
“Aye, I’ll come. But not without Máire. It’s both of us or neither.” He dropped his gaze to the ground and mumbled. “That’s if she’ll come. If she doesn’t want to leave, I won’t force her. And like I said—”
Estrada stood and sighed, then clasped Dylan’s hand, and pulled him to his feet.
“She’ll come. She married you, didn’t she?” Dylan blushed. “But what are you going to tell Manus and the Missus?”
“The truth?”
“Maybe not the whole truth. I’d leave out Cernunnos and the vampires, and focus on medical advancements and opportunities for their grandchildren.” The tips of Dylan’s ears turned beet red and he glanced up at the clouds. “Conall understands the future as just another stop on the spiral of Between. Maybe use that terminology.” Estrada sighed. “You know what? I trust you. Just go with your heart.”
Estrada wandered off into the forest with Cernunnos while Dylan and Máire said their goodbyes amid tears and hugs.
“I thought he would be harder to convince,” Estrada said, and sunk down on a huge old nurse log. Rain as faint as mist gently stippled the stream. He could understand why Dylan wanted to stay here in this simple life filled with love, family, and meaningful work.
“The threat of non-existence puts everything into perspective, does it not?” Cernunnos said.
“I suppose it does.” Estrada half-listened. He wondered if he’d ever lead a life like that. He loved being a magician and high priest. And he loved Lucy and Sensara and his Hollystone family. Crouching at the edge of the stream, he washed his hands, then cupped them and took a long drink of clear, rich water. Perhaps he should be counting his blessings rather than yearning for something that may or may not exist.
He felt Cernunnos move behind him. “For thousands of years, I’ve seen men be born and die, and then be reborn again. That is the way of it. To exist is what drives you mortals.”
“And what about Máire? Is it a mistake to bring her into the future?” He stood and stared into the god’s deep brown eyes.
“The mistake is in thinking I could deny you anything.”
Estrada felt a rush of blood stain his cheeks. And that was an entirely new feeling for him.
When they arrived back at the Standing Stones, Conall was seated on the ground with his back against the center stone. He sprung up when he saw Estrada and crushed him to his chest. “I was trying to imagine what I’d do if you never returned, and all I could see was darkness as deep and black as the void beneath Croghan Hill.”
“I hope you never have to experience that again.”
Estrada turned to thank Cernunnos, but the horned god had disappeared. Surely, that meant they’d corrected their mistake and things would flow smoothly from here on in.
As Dylan and Máire walked down the avenue of stones, Estrada could hear him telling her about what had happened here. How he’d been arrested for murder, and how Estrada had caught the actual killer, and got him released from prison. Then he’d saved his life.
“It’s going to be all right,” Dylan said. “This is my home. I grew up here and my grandfather lives just down the road. You have a family here now too.”
Let’s hope, Estrada thought. After all this, let’s hope Dermot’s living at Piper’s Dream and everything is exactly as it should be. As he followed Dylan toward the car park, he turned to see if the Horned God had reappeared.
“Don’t worry. Cernunnos is never far from you. His love is strong.” Conall punched him in the arm. “I just hope, one day, you share a loaf with me.”