Jocelyn sank down on the lounger sofa in the sunroom, watching the day turn to night. She absentmindedly chewed on her thumbnail as Taylin bustled around the kitchen, mixing up a batch of her famous sangria.
“So, are you going to tell me what happened or are we just going to sit here in silence? Because if I wanted to be around someone who was going to ignore me, I would’ve stayed home with my husband,” Taylin lamented.
“No. I guess not. I just… I guess I don’t know where to start.”
Taylin brought the pitcher and two cups over to the glass table, pouring them full of the wine and fruit mixture.
“Why don’t you explain why the hell you’re dating someone so much younger than you, and why you thought it was a good idea to bring him to the charity event?” Taylin eyed her skeptically, handing her a cup then plopping down on the other end of the sofa.
Jocelyn’s mouth fell open in shock, which she tried to hide by taking a large gulp of her sangria. She’d called Taylin over to confide in, and it was going the exact opposite of what she had expected. It felt like another attack; she was being as bad as Mason’s friends.
“What? This isn’t about that.” Jocelyn pushed herself up on the cushion. “I met his friends tonight, and they were complete jackasses. Insinuating that I’m some sort of cougar, and wondering how Mason could really consider dating me. I was a fucking joke to them!” Jocelyn felt her chest contract with the fresh pain.
“I mean, really Joss, are you surprised? Don’t get me wrong, they were total jerks for saying that, but the gist of it isn’t off. Didn’t you notice the way people looked at you both when you brought him to the fundraiser last week?”
Taylin’s words, while phrased with a delicate tone, pained her. Jocelyn was sure that her outspoken friend was going to side with her and Mason. She’d avoided her friend the past week, a little hesitant to get the third degree about the relationship, but she’d assumed that Taylin would want all the naughty details and that was something she wasn’t ready to share. But at the end of it she expected Taylin to tell her ‘who cares’ and ‘do what makes you happy’, but apparently, that wasn’t the case.
“It’s kind of to be expected,” Taylin continued. “You are a rich widow who’s had a rough couple of years, and he’s a great guy to help you transition into the next part of your life. But… I mean, look at Demi and Ashton. She married him, and now they’re divorced. That’s because he was supposed to be a transition. At our age, age isn’t just a number, it’s a lifestyle.”
Jocelyn was at a loss for words when Taylin got up to refill her glass.
“What have you guys even been doing? What can you have in common?” Taylin asked.
Jocelyn reflected on the last couple of weeks. What did they have in common? In all honesty, they hadn’t had much in common at first. But he had opened her up to new experiences and they’d found common ground, even if it was new to her. Mason found a way to pull a side of herself out that she’d never seen before. She’d started to find her voice and she was ready to give Taylin a piece of it.
“We’ve been exploring downtown. He took me to the Saturday Market, and we’ve visited the different water fountains. I even saw the Portlandia statue. Have you seen it? She’s magnificent. We went hiking, dancing, we do tons of stuff.”
“That doesn’t sound like you, Jossie. In all the years I’ve known you, that’s never been your scene. Have you thought that maybe you’re just getting caught up in his world? Yes, it’s exciting now, but it just might become exhausting. And then think about all that wasted time.” Taylin shrugged.
Jocelyn tipped back her drink, finishing it, chewing on the crisp fruit.
“More?” Taylin giggled.
“Yep.” The word popped off her lips. “I have something to say. You asked me if I was going to talk to you, then you opened your big mouth with your big opinions, not even seeming to care about my feelings or asking me what I want. If you are my friend, then you shouldn’t care what other people think. I don’t need you to protect me, I need you to support me. Even if this is a mistake, I need a friend, and I’m not sure you’re the right person for that. Not tonight at least.”
She watched as Taylin’s expression softened, maybe even a little hurt. But tonight was full of shitty words from everyone, and it looked like that wasn’t about to end any time soon.
“I think it’s time for you to go. Are you okay to drive or do you want me to call you a cab?”
“Come on, Jossie. Really? This is how it’s going to be? I just want you to be careful. You could end up with a broken heart and an empty bank account.”
“Fuck the bank account. He has his own money, and the money in my account isn’t even mine, it’s Cliff’s. I didn’t work a day in my life for that money! And even if my heart breaks, right now it seems worth it. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Why wouldn’t I understand? Do you have something to say?”
She did have something to say, but she’d already sunk low enough for tonight. If she hit her friend with a low blow, there might not be a way to take it back. Taylin would talk to her when she was ready, and there was most certainly something to talk about. More and more she had been making comments about how bad things were going between her and Phillip but dismissing it just as quickly.
“It’s time for you to go,” Jocelyn said firmly, getting off the sofa and heading toward the door.
Opening the door, she gestured for Taylin to leave. She tried to ignore the somber look on her friend’s face as she picked up her bag, slipped on her shoes and entered the dark evening.
Jocelyn locked the door behind Taylin, poured herself another glass from the pitcher of sangria, and stretched out on the lounger. Therapist Sangria on duty tonight.
Getting the same opinions from both sides was enough to make her head spin. And to think the people she considered friends were snickering behind her back. What hurt the most was that if Mason were older and she were younger, they wouldn’t have to defend their relationship to anyone. Hell, he’d be getting pats on the back.
It had been hard for her at first to deny that the age gap wasn’t an issue, but at that time they were just friends. It wasn’t so complicated, and as per usual, sex complicated everything. And this wasn’t just sex. Mason had become so much more to her. She was torn.
What Taylin and Mason’s friends said wasn’t exactly untrue. They voiced the concerns that she had pushed to the farthest parts of her mind. She knew he wasn’t into her for her money; he had his own, besides he’d always paid, even when she offered. But was there something else he was getting out of it? An ulterior motive? A phase? No. Don’t be dumb.
Jocelyn filled her cup once again and hefted herself off the sofa. If she was going to have a pity party, she was going to do it the right way: a hot bath, soft lights, cocktails, and tears.