Chapter 14      

“‘Well, over-fast dates never turned me on,’” Riley sang on the way over to pick Sadie up.

He was listening to Prince’s “Raspberry Beret,” and he had a moment of confusion. Was that really the lyric? Had Prince said such a thing? He paused the song and called up the handy little helper on his phone. He’d named her Xena, after his favorite princess. Jess might love Rapunzel, but he liked his princesses with a little less clothing and a lot more edge. “Look up lyrics for ‘Raspberry Beret.’”

He listened as Xena recited the words, and when they reached the line of the song he’d been unsure about, he had to laugh. Boy, had he been off. Prince had sung about overcast days. Not over-fast dates.

He was clearly trying to talk himself down about tonight. His subconscious had tried to use one of his music idols to confirm that he shouldn’t rush anything. After his talk with Paige, he’d wavered back and forth between going faster and keeping it slow. A long-term relationship took time to cultivate, didn’t it? He’d even made a list of what he could do to cultivate their connection, but it hadn’t helped. 

The minute he saw her, he knew what was going to happen. His mouth would dry up, his remaining brain cells would disappear, and he wouldn’t be able to form a decent sentence. And his dick? Well, it would want to take over, and that wasn’t a good idea. Sadie was a lady. He respected her. There was no way he was going to ruin this by scaring her off.

He checked his image in the rearview mirror. He was presentable if not over-groomed. Jess had insisted on brushing his hair, and when he hadn’t been looking, she’d swooped in one of her hands and slicked on some hair product. The surprise of it had jolted a girly shriek from him. The product was Mark’s, apparently, and he’d had no choice but to allow his daughter to shape and reshape his hair to her crazy specifications.

As he left the car, he tugged on his new sport jacket, the one he’d bought online with Jess in his lap. It was a brown suede—perfect for fall, his little girl had said.

She was growing up so fast.

It seemed like he was duty-bound to keep something in his life from going too fast. No over-fast dates, he told himself as he rang the doorbell.

He imagined himself cloaked in armor, impenetrable to female wiles, impervious to beauty and sexiness.

“Holy shit,” he uttered when she opened the door. Framed in the soft light of the hallway, Sadie wore a stretchy gold dress that seemed glued to her curves, curves he’d only guessed at before. These curves were surely capable of melting a superhero’s special armor as if it were plastic. And she’d knocked it out of the park by wearing gold again. Hubba, hubba. 

“Hi,” she said, smiling, her lips lush and wet in a delectable soft pink.

“Hi,” he said, gathering himself.

His nose twitched when her scent reached him—something lush and musky, like a rare flower that grows after a volcano explosion—and it felt like hot lava had landed on his skin. 

“I wasn’t going to kiss you right away, but hell…” 

He grabbed her to him, his intensity lifting her off her feet. She wrapped her arms around him as he held her in mid-air and kissed her senseless. He threw off his stupid immunity cloak and pressed her body into him, her curves warm and lush under his hands.

“Oh, Riley,” she said, breaking for air before diving into his mouth again. Her bottom lip, so perfect and plump, insisted he suck it softly. She moaned low and deep, and he felt the vibration all the way to his toes.

“We should probably leave,” he murmured, kissing her softly in bites now.

“No,” she whispered back, her breath hot against his mouth.

He tightened his hands, trying to commit the feel of her to memory, when her answer registered. “No?”

“No,” she said, pulling him inside by the lapels of his jacket.

In that moment, he decided he needed a sport jacket for every day of the week because the feel of her yanking on it in urgency and desire was one of the best freaking feelings in the world. Like finishing his first comic book or seeing Jess take her first steps.

He let her lead him inside, but his foot reached out and kicked the door closed behind them. His feet shuffled against hers as they continued to kiss. Lips. The line of cheek. The underside of jaw. The neck.

“I’m wild about this part of your body,” he murmured, breathing in her fragrance.

She shook her beautiful brown hair, hair exactly like his new superhero, and he touched it with his fingertips. He wanted to touch her everywhere. That little misheard jingle about over-fast dates played in his mind…

“Sadie.”

Her hands found their way inside his jacket, so curious and so hot.

“Okay, this time we really need to stop.” He was close to begging.

“Just a little more,” she whispered against his mouth like a siren.

They fell into a deep kiss, and together they shuffled forward as though they were doing a slow, sensuous two-step.

“Okay, seriously,” he said, close to declaring the medical certainty that all of the blood in his body had pooled to one place, a place they weren’t ready to talk about on the slow program.

“Riley, I’ve been thinking,” she said, tugging on his lapels again.

“You drive me out of mind when you do that.”

She tugged on them again, this time with a Cheshire cat smile on her beautiful face.

“Good,” she said with a note of glee in her voice. “Part of me wants to drive you wild. Riley, maybe we don’t need to go as slow as we thought. I’m not saying we need to have sex yet because I really do need to feel like we’re committed to each other, but perhaps we can enjoy…more than kisses. Oh crap, I’m getting embarrassed.”

Her hands left his lapels, and she turned her back on him. He leaned in and tucked her against him, his cheek seeking hers as a way to reassure her.

“No need to be embarrassed,” he said softly. “Some people go from kissing straight to sex, but there are no rules we need to follow.”

Her body settled back against him. “Riley, I really, really like you.”

When she spun around and faced him, he rocked back on his heels. Her brown eyes were luminous, the gold flecks shining, but the set of her jaw reminded him of Xena when she was on a mission.

“I mean…I might be falling in love with you,” she said, her voice full of the strength of conviction.

He searched inside himself, wanting to be equally as honest with her. In that moment, he felt like every superhero faced with a decision. He could tell her the truth or he could fade back into the darkness, hoping his prophesy that she would be better and happier without him was true. But the truth was as loud as thunder, as unavoidable as lightning marking the sky in angry fire.

“I might be falling in love with you too,” he said, touching her cheek.

“Time doesn’t seem to matter,” she said, putting her hand over his fast-beating heart.

There was that word again, and it raised the hairs on his arms.

“Paige was right. I don’t believe time has anything to do with love. Love just happens, and while I don’t know every little detail about you, I know what I feel for you, Riley Thomson.”

“Sadie.” She was making him believe in every storybook ending in the comic books.

“I have enough faith in the divine plan to believe you just might be the answer to my prayers…only they’re prayers I didn’t know I was making.” She framed his face with her hands. “I mean, I prayed for a godly man, one who would respect me, go to church with me, and pray with me before we made love. But I’ve met men like that, and they didn’t—”

“I can’t do any of that,” he said, his heart dropping to the floor. If that was what she wanted, he couldn’t give it to her. He didn’t think he could change who he was even for the woman who was stealing his heart.

“I know,” she whispered, “and it doesn’t matter. Do you know why?”

Oh, he was scared to hear the answer. He thought about turning away for a nanosecond, but he wouldn’t let fear hold him back. He wouldn’t let him separate it from her.

“Riley…you’re so much better than what I imagined.” She wrapped her arms around him. “You make me laugh. You listen to me. And most of all, you see me! Me! The drawing you gave me… Riley, no one outside my family has ever seen me like that.”

“You’re so easy to see,” he told her, holding her close. “You’re like the richest golden color palette. Your heart is in everything you do, and it’s beautiful to behold.”

“So is yours,” she said, looking up at him. “You’re a wonderful father and a great friend to Paige and Mark. Riley, I…I don’t know all the reasons you want to take it slow. I don’t know fully what happened with Jess’ mom. But I want you to let me in. I want…”

His heart was pounding in loud beats. “What do you want?”

“I want us to make a go of this and be…committed…like boyfriend/girlfriend,” she said in a fierce voice. “I’ve felt like a coward most of my life, and then my sister, Shelby, talked me into finding our daddy. I was scared, but I couldn’t let her do it alone. And in doing it, in facing it, I found a courage I’d never expected to see in myself. I found I wouldn’t break into a million pieces or blow away in tough times. I was so much stronger than I’d ever realized.”

She looked like a goddess come to life. She awed him. 

“When I decided to choose love and find Paige, I cinched it. I’m brave. I’m bold. Then there’s you…you’ve helped me see that too.”

And beautiful, he thought. “Yes, you are.”

“Riley, I’m not going to let my old ways of doing things shape how this thing between us progresses. I know Jess is the most important thing in your life, and I think that’s wonderful, but I want to be more to you than bedtime texts and Friday nights. I also don’t plan on coming between you and Jess. If anything, I’d like to celebrate her place in your life.”

He pressed his forehead to hers, unbearably moved.

“I just want to be with you,” she said.

“Me too,” he replied, tightening his hold on her. “I want us to be committed to each other too. Be a…thing. Sadie, I’ve been struggling with this, but in this moment, I can’t seem to remember why. Would you come over and spend time with me and my daughter? She’s been wanting that, and it could include a picnic or flying a kite…or playing princess. She likes to keep her options open. ”

She put her fingers to his lips. “It doesn’t matter what we do, Riley. I’ll be happy for it. Grateful for it.”

“I do need to tell you all about Jess’ mother sometime,” he whispered. “But I can’t do it right now. It’s a sad, dark tale, and I’m still ashamed of it.”

“Oh, honey,” she said, wrapping him in the most beautiful benediction. “Whatever it is, I’m here.”

He kissed her cheek. “Oh, Sadie, I know we haven’t gone out tonight yet, but what are your plans for Sunday? I know you go to church and hang out with your family…”

She was quiet for a moment. “No, I can make that.”

“We’re no longer on the slow program,” he said, allowing his fingers to caress her hip. “We’ve progressed to the committed program.”

“Indeed,” she said, “and that was my plan.”

He laughed. “If you knew what my plan was tonight… Let’s just say yours was so much better. Now, I need to see this Japanese quilt Paige told me about. I have strict instructions to help you believe you’re an artist.”

“Really, Riley…” she said, ducking from his gaze.

“No ‘really, Riley,’” he answered, lifting her chin until she met his eyes. “I mean it. Show me the quilt, Sadie.”

“Fine,” she said, taking his hand and leading him upstairs, “but this is really personal for me. Your opinion means so much.”

When they reached the room, he stopped in the doorway. “Is that it?” he asked, pointing to the half-made quilt on the bed, a quilt unlike any he’d ever seen. It was more like a painting. From this angle he couldn’t see how she’d made the sky look like it was a windy day—he only knew that it did. Whatever her technique, it showed a magic and an artistry that awed him.

“Yes, that’s it,” she said, clearing her throat.

“My God,” he managed to say. “Sadie, it’s…it’s…I need to compose myself. Can I touch it?”

When he ran his fingers over the precise stitching, he shook his head. “I can feel the wind blowing. Sadie…this is…one of the most beautiful pieces of art I’ve ever seen. The blue and gray hues you used for the sky, the stitching…it feels alive to me. My God, I never knew. Sadie, this tops anything I’ve ever created.”

“Oh, don’t say that,” she said, her face stricken. “I didn’t mean for your feelings to be hurt.”

He looked over and smiled at her. “Oh, they aren’t. I’m great at what I do, and I love it. But some people’s artistic vision and ability is out in a…different stratosphere…like Beethoven or Warhol or Chagall. Your work is going to go in a museum someday. Mark my words.”

“Huh?” she spurted out.

He almost laughed. “Sadie, you shouldn’t be selling your quilts in the craft store anymore. You need a bigger audience. Heck, you should be charging a buttload for something like this.”

Her chest rose with a huge breath, and she looked like she was going to have a panic attack at that thought.

“Okay, let’s leave those last points for another chat,” he said, holding out his hand. “Come here and take a deep breath.”

She clasped it and stood next to him, calming herself. “I called it ‘The Promised Land.’ It’s where all things are possible.”

“I like that,” he said, aware of the biblical reference. It wasn’t heavy-handed though. She was conveying an idea he could relate to—a place full of purity and warmth and comfort. He wanted to live in a land like that.

“I’m glad you like it,” she said.

“I more than like it,” he responded, facing her. “I want to take a picture and text my brother because his mind is going to explode, and then you’ll have one more person telling you the truth. Sadie, you’re an artist.”

She ducked her chin. “I just do what I love.”

Okay, he was going to have to be a little tougher. “Yes, but I want you to do something for me.”

Her smile was immediate when she met his gaze. God, she was beautiful. “Every morning and every time you start quilting, I want you to say, ‘I’m an artist.’ Will you do that for me?”

Because if she needed to start there until she could do it for herself, that was totally fine in his book.

“I’ll try,” she said, “but—”

“Remember what Yoda says,” he interrupted. “‘There is no try.’”

She leveled him a look. “Seriously, did you have to bring a Yoda reference into this moment?”

“It’s who I am,” he said with a shrug.

“I think you need to kiss me,” she said, her lips twitching. “To help convince me I’m an artist.”

“I can do that,” he answered, kissing her softly on the lips. “How long do you think it’s going to take for you to believe it?”

“A pretty long time,” she whispered.

Oddly, he was more than okay with that.