Harper knew how to do this. Knew how to pick herself up and keep breathing, even after a direct hit to the heart. It hurt. It hurt like hell. But she was, if nothing else, resilient. Even if it didn’t feel like it right now.
The trick was digging deep and finding a way to forgive herself for her part in what had happened, and then accept that there were certain things she couldn’t control.
Such as what someone else thought of her.
Her phone buzzed, and she made herself calmly pull it out of her pocket, ignoring the leap in her pulse.
Bodie: I’ve got her.
Harper nearly collapsed with relief before she texted back: thanks for letting me know.
Ivy’s text came next: I’m so sorry about last night.
Harper: are you okay?
Ivy: Yes. I’m with my dad. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have involved you.
Harper thumbed an immediate response: I have zero regrets about getting you out of a bad situation. I’ll always help when you need it.
Taking a deep breath, she slid her phone away and looked around. So she’d been walked away from. Again. So what? She’d survived before, and she’d survive now. She still wanted to be here. That hadn’t changed. She’d come here to Sunrise Cove to find joy, and she had. But she’d also come to get her act together.
Time to concentrate on doing that. Past time.
Yes, she’d been baking up a storm and selling okay, but she hadn’t done any of the things she kept reminding herself to do in order to be truly successful. Which meant that what Bodie had said to her might actually be true. She hadn’t believed in herself, not 100 percent. And if she didn’t, who would?
Okay, so where to start? One thing she knew: in order to get return customers, she had to catch them—hook, line, and sinker.
Takeout only wasn’t going to do that.
So she splashed water on her face, put on her big-girl panties—well, mentally, because it was laundry day and she was in her last pair of clean undies, which read: I’m good at getting things to rise.
Two hours later, she stood in the middle of the bakery. She’d just done more to make strides for the bakery—and herself—than in the month-plus she’d been here. She’d placed ads, posted on social media, and contacted local wedding planners and caterers, offering her services. She’d created a real menu. Well, it was on a self-standing chalkboard, but still. She’d set up her four cute little round tables with equally cute mismatched chairs. She hung pictures on one wall from the building’s past, the ones she’d found in the kitchen closet. Another wall held her own culinary past and fun bakery sayings.
don’t be afraid to take whisks.
baking, because murder is wrong.
bake it happen.
And her personal favorite: i’m the secret ingredient.
She needed to remember that one. It didn’t matter what a man thought of her. She was a strong, independent woman who didn’t need a man. Drawing a deep breath, she turned in a slow circle, smiling with pride at her cute place.
She still had a sick, hollow feeling in the pit of her stomach, but doing something for herself had helped some. She no longer felt like she wanted to throw up. That was a bonus, right? Right now was about getting ready to open, because ready or not, she’d decided today would be her grand opening. It was time.
She ran upstairs to change really quick out of her jeans and into a cute sundress and a pair of wedge sandals she’d splurged on because they made her look taller. Hopefully that would distract anyone from the fact that her hair was fluffed in all its bird’s-nest glory. Even pulled back in a ponytail, it was reaching critical mass. Her eyes were blurry and scratchy, but crying did that to a person. And oh, how she hated to cry. Especially over a man. She’d thought those days were long behind her, but apparently she hadn’t learned her lesson yet.
She had it down now. And maybe a small part of her wanted to go back to bed, because if she let her pessimism take hold, she knew today had the potential to be shitty.
No. No, she wasn’t going to do that, assume the worst. She was going to assume the best.
If it killed her.
She looked at the clock: 7:50 a.m. She was going to open in ten minutes. She’d be offering free cookies to every customer, and it would be a good day. A great day.
“What are you mumbling about?” Shay asked, coming in the bakery kitchen door.
“Nothing.”
“Uh-huh.” Shay grabbed a cupcake for each hand. “Spill.”
Harper sighed. It didn’t help that Shay looked great as always, and adding insult to injury, she had a certain look. “You’re wearing a honeymoon glow.”
Shay grinned, stuffing her face. “Enough about me. Talk.”
“You’re eating my goods.”
“Put it on my account.”
“Your balance is approaching the national debt.” Harper narrowed her eyes. “Wait a minute. Why are you being so nice?”
“Because when I was an idiot, as you so helpfully pointed out, I was lonely. And now you’re the idiot. Or so I’m guessing, by your splotchy face, red eyes, and woe-is-me posture. I figure you need me to help you through whatever fight you and Bodie had.”
Harper immediately straightened her spine to resemble a steel rod. “How do you know I was the idiot?”
Shay shrugged. “It takes two idiots.”
“A lot you know,” Harper said, picking up a knife to slice into her banana nut bread. “He walked away from me. We’re done. His words, bee-tee-dub, not mine.” And, as it turned out, even saying so felt like someone was physically stomping on her heart.
Shay frowned. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure!”
“Are you aware you’re waving a knife and yelling at your best friend?”
Harper set the knife down with a whole bunch of effort. “Best friend? You don’t even like me.”
“I like you more now that you put the knife down. And since when is that a requisite to be BFFs anyway?”
Whelp, she had her there . . .
“Spill,” Shay said, waving the cupcake at Harper as she inhaled it.
Harper started to open her mouth, but her eyes filled so she shut it again.
Shay pointed at her. “No. No tears for boys.”
“Says the person who cried over Mace every time we drank together.”
“As my BFF, it’s pretty effing rude to point that out.” Shay took another bite and moaned. “Damn, you can bake.” She wiped her mouth with a napkin. “Okay, so fine, Bodie walked. Did you let him? I mean, who didn’t keep who?”
Harper stared at her. “Are you listening? He walked away from me. And yes, I let him. I’ve had enough of being walked away from in my life. Why would I try to stop him?”
“Well . . . there’s walking. And then there’s needing some space to think. Which isn’t the same thing at all as not wanting to be with you anymore. Trust me, I confused the two myself, so I get it.”
“Well, I don’t,” Harper said. “I’m not you, and at the risk of sounding like a broken record, you don’t even know the story.”
“You’re right.” Shay hopped up on the counter and sat back like she was about to watch a reality show unfold.
Harper crossed her arms.
“What? It’s not like I’m glad you’re hurting. I’m just relieved to be the watching side of the drama for once.” She gave Harper a “go on” gesture with her hand.
Harper sighed. “Last night at the bar, Ivy called me upset, beyond upset. She needed help and a pickup, so I rushed out to go get her and took her home.”
“Okay. That was incredibly sweet of you. What’s the problem?”
“It’s twofold.” Harper grimaced. “She asked me not to tell her dad, and . . . I didn’t. And two, I didn’t go inside Bodie’s cabin with her when I dropped her off and wait for him to get home to make sure Ivy stayed put.”
“Hey, Ivy’s sixteen. Old enough to be left alone at home. That’s a nonstarter as far as I’m concerned. But the not-telling him . . . wasn’t he with you at the time?”
“He’d gone into the kitchen. Ivy was crying, and definitely not okay. She asked me not to tell him, and given how she sounded, I just rushed out. I was worried and scared for her. When I dropped her at Bodie’s, she promised me she’d tell him everything.”
“Only . . . she didn’t, I’m guessing. And he got pissed at you.”
“Yeah.” There was more to the story, of course, like Ivy taking money from the bar and then running off on Bodie this morning, but that was their story to tell.
“Look,” Shay said. “He was probably just worried and scared too. I love the guy, but it sounds like he took it out on you, which isn’t cool. Sometimes the Campbells . . . well, they don’t handle not being in control very well. And they often have to be confronted before they’ll talk about what the real problem is, especially if emotions are involved. Which they’re not a fan of.”
Harper knew Bodie had been stunned and terrified for his daughter, someone he’d go to the mat for every time. His life for hers, no price, not ever. That was the unspoken promise between parent and child, something she hadn’t really understood until she’d watched them find their way in each other’s lives. Feeling suddenly a little nauseated, she put down the knife and started to plate the slices of banana bread.
“Can I have one?” Shay asked. “No, two.”
Harper handed over two slices. “I think you’re right.”
“Of course I am. About what?”
“About why Bodie reacted the way he did, and about needing to be confronted to talk about it. He confronted me this morning.” Blindsided, more like. “While avoiding any of the real stuff.” Like how he’d become an insta-dad without the benefit of experience or warning, and it was hard. Really hard. “But I was wrong too. I should’ve found a way to tell him, not exclude him.” She didn’t know why she’d done it. Nope, scratch that. She did know. She loved Ivy. Her first instinct had been to react to the fear in the teen’s voice and let it dictate her moves.
But the fact was, she loved Bodie too. When that had happened exactly, she wasn’t sure. But it was every bit as real and true as her love for Ivy.
“Well, the good news,” Shay said around a mouthful, “is that this is not all on you. He should’ve trusted that you had her best interests at heart. Just talk to him, be your annoyingly sweet self, and—”
“I’m not all that sweet.”
Shay laughed. “You’re literally the sweets girl. Actually, make that the sweetheart girl, because everyone likes you.”
“Stop.”
“Like you don’t know you’re at the top of everyone’s list of favorite sweethearts. Harper: the Sweetheart List girl.”
Abuela walked into the kitchen. “Flapping your jaws when there’s only two minutes before opening? There’s a line outside.”
“Oh my God, really?” Harper asked.
“No,” Abuela said. “Not really. You’d need ads and incentives and an area for customers to actually sit and enjoy to earn a line.”
“Ha,” Harper said. “Done and done and done. Can you unlock the front door? I’ll be out there in a minute.”
“Put some blush and lipstick on first,” Abuela said. “Or you’ll scare people.”
Harper drew a deep breath and tried to find some calm and patience. Both were in short supply. She looked at Shay.
“She’s right. You look like death warmed over.”
“You always kick someone when they’re down?”
“Sorry,” Shay said. “Bad habit. You look . . . great.”
Harper realized Shay was trying to be nice. It made her heart hurt even more, and she hugged her tight. “Thanks.”
Shay sighed dramatically. “This is why I don’t have girlfriends. Guys don’t ever want a hug. They want to sleep with you or eat. That’s it.”
“Listen, I’ll be right back, okay? Take over for Abuela? Don’t let her serve any customers. The pricing’s on my new cute menu, you’ll see it. And give everyone a free cookie.”
“You do realize you don’t have to bribe people to like you with cookies, right? I told you, everyone loves you. Don’t give your shit away. And don’t leave me alone in here.”
Shay was wrong. Not everyone loved her. “No one ever shows up before nine. I’ll be back way before then.” She was searching her pockets for her keys. She realized she needed to do something before she could move on. She needed to apologize to Bodie for her part in last night. As for if Bodie was open to hear her or not, that was on him.
Shay got between her and the door, frowning at the look on Harper’s face. “Where are you going? You’re finally having a grand opening and you’re going to leave?”
“I need to talk to Bodie so I can go into this grand opening with a clear mind and know I did the best I could. That I will always do the best I can.” She met Shay’s gaze. “He’s important to me.”
“Well, duh. But what am I, chopped liver?”
“Not even close. You’re a part of my new family, and trust me, I don’t say that lightly.”
Shay stared at her, her eyes going a little bit shiny. “Oh,” she said softly. “Well, then carry on. But if someone pays cash and needs change, don’t expect me to do math. I never do math for free.”
“Noted. I’ll be right back.” Harper yanked open the back door, thinking even if a bear was in her driver’s seat, it wouldn’t stop her.
But she did stop, and not because of a bear.
Bodie stood there, hand raised to knock.
“I was just coming to find you,” she said.
He looked surprised. “But it’s your grand opening.”
“How did you know?”
“I saw it on TikTok.”
In the back of her mind, a few brain cells stood up and cheered that her marketing was working. But wait a second. “I didn’t put it on TikTok, just Instagram and Twitter.”
“You’re welcome!” Shay yelled from inside.
“Is that why you’re here?” she asked Bodie. “The grand opening? Because the free cookies are all out in the front with Shay and Abuela—although they’re probably all gone by now. Shay was pretty hungry.”
“Hey, I’m not that much of a freeloader!” Shay called out. “And what did I tell you about those cookies! We don’t need them to love you!”
Bodie gave a hint of a smile. “Truth.”
Harper got a sense of exhaustion pouring from him, emotional as well as physical, and had to work hard not to give a shit. Finally, he gave a slow, solemn shake of his head. “I’m not here for the free cookies.”
She tried to look into his eyes, but they were covered by his dark sunglasses. He was still as stone, and she couldn’t get a bead on his mood with those glasses. Not that it mattered, because she was going to tell him what was on her mind regardless. “I shouldn’t have kept Ivy’s call from you, and I’m sorry for that, more than I can ever say, but I can’t . . . I won’t apologize for keeping a promise to her. Yes, I should’ve included you, but in the moment all I knew was that I couldn’t betray Ivy that way. Not after all she’s been through, not even for you.” There it was, her heart laid bare before him, all her emotional baggage condensed into that one sentence, leaving her feeling incredibly vulnerable. Everything in her wanted to take a step back inside and shut the door to protect herself. Well, except for her feet, which had turned into two blocks of concrete.
For a beat, nothing moved, not him, not her, not the air, nothing. Then he shoved the sunglasses to the top of his head. “I understand,” he said quietly. “And I’m grateful.” Gone was his protective wall, and his eyes were full of regret. “I let my fear for Ivy . . .” He shook his head and drew in a deep breath.
“She’s okay?” Harper asked quickly.
He nodded and ran his hand over his eyes. “Yeah. Thanks to you. And I’d have done the exact same thing in your position. I’m just thankful you were there for her when she needed you. I’m so sorry, Harper. I should never have left like that.”
“I mean, I get it. You were worried sick,” she said through a thick throat, nodding. Then slowly, she changed to shaking her head. “It was the way you . . .” She drew a deep breath. “You walked away from me, Bodie. You said we were done. But you’d promised you weren’t going anywhere. And then when the going got tough, you said goodbye and left.”
He closed his eyes for a beat, and when he opened them, they were filled with a grim remorse. “I know. I let myself go into a free fall and took it out on you. I hate that I did that to you. I’m so sorry, Harper. If I could take it back, I would. But I can promise you that I’m figuring my shit out, and I learn from my mistakes. If you let me, I can prove I’ll never do that again.”
The words were shiny and pretty. But there was something she needed to know. “Your mom told me something about you when she came to meet me at the bakery.”
He grimaced. “Oh boy.”
“She said you learned to protect yourself by hiding your emotion and by disengaging. That you could protect people with your own body without hesitation, but you also believed you could further protect people’s hearts by shutting them out.”
“My mom talks too much.”
“She loves you. Is what she said true?”
“Shit.” He ran a hand over the scruff on his jaw. “Yeah. Probably. Definitely.” He drew a deep breath. “But I mean it when I tell you I won’t shut you out again. You deserve better. You deserve . . . everything.”
It was her turn to take a deep breath. “If we’re being honest, I was scared last night. Before Ivy called. I was watching Mace and Shay, and you with your brothers, and . . .” She shook her head. “I suddenly was afraid that I was in it alone, that you had so much love in your life that you could never feel the same things for me that I felt for you. When I had Ivy on the phone, I knew I needed to tell you in spite of what she wanted.” She swallowed. “But I didn’t. I purposely kept you out of the loop. I think it’s because I knew it would mess things up between us.” She looked away from the intensity in his gaze. “My only excuse is that falling in love with you is the most terrifying thing I’ve ever done.”
He was suddenly very still. “You love me?”
Shay stuck her head out. “Bodie, are you kidding me? That’s all you heard?”
Ivy pushed past Shay. “Oh no, I’m missing it!”
“Yes,” Harper said to Bodie, barely audible to her own ears over her heartbeat pounding through her. “I love you.” She let out a breath. “I wasn’t sure I would ever tell you until right now, but that doesn’t make it any less true.”
“He loves you back,” Ivy said breathlessly as Bodie opened his mouth. “He didn’t figure it out until this morning.”
“Guys are always slow like that,” Shay said helpfully. “Well, not my guy, because he’s got his shit together. But all the others are.”
Ivy put her hand on Harper’s arm. Her mouth was smiling, but her eyes were serious. Worried. “For grown adults, you two can be pretty dense.”
“I’ve got another word for it,” Shay offered. “But sure, let’s go with dense.”
“They’re wrong,” Bodie said to Harper. “I knew I loved you. I just let it mess with my head. So much that I never told you how you’re the glue. You made me and Ivy possible.”
Ivy’s eyes filled at this. “He’s right. And I’m so, so sorry about last night—”
“Honey, I told you, it’s okay.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I put you in a terrible situation.”
“Actually, I put myself in that position,” Harper said. “I should have never agreed to keep something regarding you from your dad. That wasn’t okay.”
Ivy threw herself at Harper in a hard hug that felt so sweet, Harper nearly lost it. “Don’t hate me,” she whispered.
“Are you kidding?” She wrapped her arms around Ivy and squeezed. “If I had a daughter, I couldn’t love her more than I love you. I’m so happy you found family.” When they pulled apart, Bodie took Harper’s hand, his other gently lifting her face to his. “You’re a part of this family too, Harper.”
“Even though you know I don’t always make the best decisions?”
He shook his head. “You don’t have the market cornered there.”
She snorted. “Oh, so you’re able to make a bullet-point list of the things you’ve screwed up?”
Without preamble, he ticked off his bullet points. “Blew up an op that cost a friend his life, got a stranger pregnant and never knew my daughter, kept you at arm’s length and hurt you as a result.” He shook his head. “Everyone’s got a long list of things they’d redo, Harper. Would you like to know what I’d redo?”
She nodded.
He stepped into her, running his hands up her arms to cup her face. “I’d start with not overreacting with fear when Ivy was gone, which led me to do one of my top two stupidest moments ever—walking away from you.”
With each word, her heart got lighter. “And the other stupid thing?”
“Believing I couldn’t fall in love.” He smiled that just-for-her smile. “You sparked joy in my life from the moment you told me to take a hike when I tried to help you with your chains.” He brushed his lips to her forehead, and she felt him smile against her. “When I’m with you, I’m reminded that I’m more than the things I’ve seen and done. I can feel. I can love. And I love you, Harper. So much.”
Knees a little wobbly, Harper backed to a chair and sank into it.
Ivy shifted, looking like a teenager who’d just caught her parents necking. “Is this going to get much mushier? Cuz I’m going out front for this part. Do I still have a job? I know I don’t deserve it, but—”
“You still have a job,” Harper said, both laughing and maybe crying. “You have a place here, and in my life and heart always.”
Ivy’s eyes filled as she bit her lower lip, then nodded shyly and headed out to the front room.
“I missed you last night,” Bodie said. He crouched on the balls of his feet to look her in the eyes. “I want you in my life. Now you. What do you want, Harper?”
She’d come to a decision about her life. Starting now, maybe not all the time, maybe not with everyone, but definitely with this man, she wasn’t going to drop hints, hope for a sign, or ask for less than she wanted. “I want you to need me.”
His eyes met hers with a whisper of surprise in them. “Babe, I need you more than my next breath. You’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever met, and I can’t imagine my life without you in it. I know you’ve been through a lot when it comes to relationships, and you deserve better. I hope you believe that. I want to love you, Harper, just as you are, for as long as you’ll let me.”
Ivy popped her head back in. “Oh my God, did you just propose? And you did it wrong!”
Bodie’s mom’s head appeared next to Ivy’s. “Did he just propose to her? Where’s the ring?”
Shay’s head was there as well, the three of their faces lined up in the doorway, squished together like animated characters. “It sure sounded like a proposal.”
Serena became the fourth head, nodding in agreement. “It was lovely.”
Zeke was eyeing the place. “Look, I’m just here because I heard there were going to be free cookies.”
“I still don’t see a ring,” Bodie’s mom fretted. “What son of mine would propose without a ring?”
“The son who didn’t just propose,” Bodie said, “because he understands Harper wants and deserves more time to make sure I’m not always such a dumbass.” He never took his eyes off Harper. “The son who wants her to have all the time she needs, but also wants her to know I’m an option when and if she decides she wants to take that step with me.”
Harper smiled at him. “Bodie?”
He smiled back. “Yeah?”
“I love who you are too.”
He pulled her into him, one hand palming the back of her head, the other sliding across her shoulders for a warm hug that had her wanting to climb him like a tree. Well, except for their audience. She was starting to understand that with the Campbells, there wasn’t going to be much privacy, but she’d had enough privacy in her life. This was better. This was everything.
“We’re going to need more sourdough bread!” Abuela yelled from the front. “In case anyone here happens to care about business!”
Harper pulled back from Bodie but kept a hand in his as she wrapped an arm around Ivy’s neck and hugged her tight too. Then they all went out front.
The place was packed. Bodie turned a slow circle and smiled at Harper. “You made some changes. I love it.” He caught sight of her chalkboard menu, and item #3—Austin’s Moose Tracks Pie, and looked incredibly moved. “Harper.”
“More bread!” Abuela repeated. “And cupcakes. And some croissants too. Oh, and a raise for me, stat!”
Harper stood there, marveling. She’d found her place. Her people. Her life. “I’m going to need a list.”
Bodie’s eyes were warm and serious and full of so much emotion she didn’t know how to process it all. Then he gave a slow, beautiful smile, took her hand, and brought it to his mouth, brushing a kiss over her fingers. “A list, Harper? From you?”
“Yeah.” She’d never been so happy in her life. “Go figure, right? But I’m developing a real fondness for liking where I am and where I’m going. And to keep it all together, the occasional list might be helpful. For instance, apparently I need more sourdough bread, cupcakes, and croissants. And, last but most definitely not least, you.”
His grin was instant, though when he spoke, his voice was rough, telling her how important this was. How important she was. “I like being in your plans. It’s convenient, since you’re in mine.”
“You’ll have to excuse them,” Shay said to the people in line. “They always forget they’re not alone.”
Bodie squeezed Harper’s hand. “You ready for all this?”
“As long as I’ve got you and Ivy.” She smiled. “Always.”