‘What’s going on?’ Star asked Pat Dillon in reaction to the commotion at the top end of the market.
‘Some work’s being done up at Tasty Pasties, by the look of it,’ the woman told her.
‘They’ve put hoarding up around the sign and are closing for the whole day on Wednesday. Bad timing if you ask me, what with this week’s festivities an’ all. Mrs Harris came down for some extra carrots and onions earlier, but she was holding her cards very close to her chest when I asked her what was happening. I reckon it’s been sold already.’
‘That was quick. Especially as it’s freehold, that one. Philip Gilmour must be laughing. He’s sold it just in time for Christmas so he can run off into the sunset with wads of cash and the new boyfriend Charlie told me about.’
Pat’s eyes filled with tears.
‘Oh Pat, I’m sorry – I wasn’t thinking. Are you sad about Darren?’
‘Yes.’ She swiped at her eyes and said angrily, ‘Charlie laughs about every other bugger – oops. See? I say everything wrong my bloody self! You can’t say this, and you can’t say that.’
‘It’s OK,’ Star soothed. ‘The PC police aren’t listening. But I know what you mean, you do have to think before you say anything these days. Where is Charlie anyway?’
‘Just on his way back from the wholesaler. We’ve had so many pre-orders in for Christmas we’re working sixteen-hour days at the moment. It’s hard getting through it without Daz. What am I going to do, Star?’
‘It’s a tricky one.’
‘Tell me about it. I love me old man, course I do, but those twin boys are my bloody life.’
Star was thoughtful for a second. ‘I think the answer is time. As time passes he will realise he’s missing Daz. I said something indirectly to him the other day. Probably shouldn’t have, but maybe all these things might sink in. He’s obviously not prejudiced towards Philip, so I don’t really understand his issue. And also, him having to work so hard without Daz on the stall at the moment, that’s another thing to make him think.’ She looked into Pat’s eyes and said kindly, ‘Try not to worry too much.’
‘Bloody men! I mean, Star, what do we need ’em for really? I think once we’ve procreated we should just throw ’em out so they can run off and sow their seed elsewhere. I’m sure they’d love that. Just think: we wouldn’t have to put the toilet seat down or pick up wet towels or hear the words “What’s for dinner?” ever again. Then us ladies, we just make sure we have a good network of friends and a brothel full of firm, toned young men on every street corner.’
Star laughed out loud. ‘Good on yer, Pat. That sounds like a great plan. Ouch.’ She winced and put her hand on her abdomen.
‘You all right, darlin’? Go in and sit down. Take the weight off for a minute.’
‘I’m fine, just a little twinge. I’ve still got around twelve weeks left, so we don’t want him popping out just yet.’
‘Oh, I didn’t think you’d found out the sex?’
‘I didn’t and I know I shouldn’t say this, but I do really want a little boy. I hope if I keep saying it, he will be one.’
‘I always wanted boys. Lovely they are. Mind you, I’m biased and don’t know no different. You at your auntie’s for Christmas again this year?’
‘No, we’re going to Bee Cottage. Pearl is a great cook and she wanted a houseful, so Joe has invited me, Mum, Skye and Auntie Flo. Billy, Kara and Jen will be there. And Pearl’s sister, husband and two kids are coming in the evening.’
‘Blimey, a right old knees-up.’
‘I know – and guess who’ll be the nominated driver.’ Star was awkward for a second. ‘I hope you’re OK about Daz joining us too?’
Pat looked sad. ‘I was waiting for him to say what he was doing.’
‘Shit, sorry, Pat, with days to go I just assumed he’d have said something to you by now.’
‘It’s all right. I’d guessed already and Billy and Kara are going to come to us in the evening now, so we’re not on our tod all day.’
At that moment a young lad wearing a fake moustache and beret riding an old-fashioned bicycle with a big basket in the front braked sharply in front of them. He had a string of onions around his neck and his mouth was crammed with braces. He handed Star and Pat a piece of paper and in the worst French accent possible said, ‘Bone jaw, mad hams. I invite you to zee opening drinks at zee new and improved Tasty Pasties on zee twenty-third of December at five-thirty p.m.’ Then he was off again, stopping at each unit as he made his way down the hill.
Star looked closely at the flyer. ‘Intriguing. We shall have to go.’
‘You bet we will. French, eh? Maybe, it’s gonna be a deli or something?’ Pat frowned. ‘I bloody hope they keep selling them pasties though. I will miss ’em if they don’t.’
‘Snail pasties, nice.’ Star laughed.
Pat was amused, but just then Charlie Dillon’s voice could be heard calling his wife’s name from inside the fruit and veg shop. ‘Talk of the devil,’ she said. ‘He must have parked out the back. OK, I’d better get in there. Ta-ta, luv.’
‘Take care and if I don’t see you before, I’ll see you for a frog’s leg or two on Wednesday.’
‘Ooh la la – you’re on. Au revoir!’ Pat wiggled her big bottom in the usual faded tatty jeans she wore for the market and sashayed her way inside.