CHAPTER 10

Creating the Magickal You

ou are the most important element in magick. The crucial tools are your mind, will, and body, not your athame and candles. Few magicians would enter the circle wearing a torn robe and carrying a dirty pentacle, yet many people perform rituals every week with unbalanced personalities and no conscious connection to the divine. You can do better.

We are going to look at some concepts for a kind of personal “makeover”: these include balancing the elements in your life, an internal sacred marriage, and connecting more strongly with Spirit. All these will help to develop your magickal persona and will not only lead to stronger magick, but will deepen your whole life.

Balancing the Elements in Yourself

An ongoing task for the beginning magician is to seek balance among the elements within. The pentagram symbol is, among other things, a symbol of balance: five points on the star representing Spirit, Air, Fire, Water, and Earth. In human terms, that would be balance of:

• spirituality (relationship with divinity, living an ethical life),
• mind (intellect, imagination),
• will (passion, direction, focused energy),
• emotion (feelings, intuition), and
• body (health, abundance, other practical matters).

We all know people who do not achieve this balance: highly intelligent people (Air) who don’t pay their bills or clean house (no Earth); very goal- directed people (Fire) who seem to lack loving relationships (no Water); practical folks (Earth) who never get passionate about anything (no Fire).

The best magicians—and the most complete humans—are those who develop strength in all these areas.

The Elemental Star

Here is a tool to help you discover how balanced or unbalanced you are, using an elemental model. It is only one model, and there are many others you could use based on the Qabalistic Tree of Life, the major chakras, and so on. But this particular model has proven useful for many students of magick.

Directions

1. Answer each of the following questions by checking the boxes (for “yes” or “mostly”) or leaving them blank (for “no” or “usually not”). For your first attempt at the star, do not look for finesse; if a statement is more true than false for you, mark it as a “yes.”
2. Once you have finished one section of questions, add up your check marks (“yeses”) and put the total in the space at the bottom of that section.
3. When you have all five totals, mark them on the star diagram. Take the total for Air and count out from the center toward the word Air, with the center point being zero. Draw a circle around the point where you land.
4. Do the same with your totals for Fire, Water, Earth, and Spirit.
5. Now connect the dots to form your personal star. Draw a line from the point you circled under Spirit, down and right to the open circle at the junction of two star lines; then to the point you circled for Air, then left to the next open circle clockwise, and all the way around. When you are done, you will probably have a rather lopsided star inside the pentagram in the diagram.

As an example, a person who was very strong in Earth, weak in Fire, and average in the other elements might draw a star like this:

Elemental Star Questions

AIR: Intellect, thought, and imagination

I am curious about life and everything

I pursue ongoing, organized study (in any field)

I have a vivid imagination

I have the ability to think logically

I have the ability to organize information

I can alter my consciousness at will

I have the ability to focus and concentrate

I can easily redirect my thoughts

I use different ways of “knowing”

I usually know where to find information

________ TOTAL

FIRE: Will, energy, and direction

My life goals are clear

I am effective at achieving my goals

I have a high energy level

I understand will and how to direct it

I exhibit focused passion in my interests

I have strong assertiveness skills

I maintain my chakras and energy body

I am effective at raising power

I am effective at directing power

I am effective at grounding power

________ TOTAL

WATER: Emotion and intuition

I am in a loving and stable relationship

I am in touch with my emotions

I have a constructive relationship with shadow

I am able to express love and affection

I am able to receive love and affection

I express negative emotions in appropriate ways

I maintain healthy friendships

I trust my intuition or “inner bell”

I have high self-esteem

I control my own emotional state

________ TOTAL

EARTH: Health, wealth, and material possessions

I usually breathe clean air

I usually drink pure water

I usually eat healthful foods

I usually get sufficient rest

I usually do balanced exercise daily

I work with my physician/healer/dentist as appropriate

My home is clean and attractive

I have steady employment and a sufficient income for my needs

I have a balanced relationship with my possessions

I spend time outdoors with nature

________ TOTAL

SPIRIT: Relationship with Deity

I perform a daily personal spiritual practice

I have a spiritual support group available

I have the ability to center

I have an array of spiritual tools for coping with stress or crises

I have a relationship with allies or guides

I realize that God/dess is within me

I regularly celebrate or worship

I maintain a relationship with a particular aspect of Deity

I explore and respect other religions

I experience peace and joy

________ TOTAL

Your Elemental Star

Your Priority Element for Personal Work

Your lowest score, which will appear as the smallest point on the star, is probably the area of your life that needs the most work. Pick one high-priority item from that area and create a plan to fix the problem. (However, an exception would be any Earth issue that threatens your life or health; for example, if you aren’t getting enough to eat or have no home. In that case, work on the Earth issue first, no matter how the other areas look.)

Don’t be shy about asking for help. If there is a spiritual leader you trust, or family member, counselor, teacher, or simply a good friend, enlist their help to make a plan. You will need to:

• write down your goal. Be as specific as possible.
• figure a way to measure your progress; exactly how will you know when you have achieved your goal?
• write down some very detailed, specific steps to get there. Break them down into small enough chunks so that they seem doable.
• consider what resources you have already to help you. These can be people, organizations, skills, information, etc.
• consider what obstacles might interfere and how you can minimize or remove them.
• add to your list the dates when you expect to complete each step. Remember, “a goal is a dream with a deadline.”
• look at your list daily, and take one action, no matter how small, to move closer to success.
• celebrate with your helpers when you have achieved the goal!

Then choose another area and begin on that one. Bit by bit, you change your star.

Now, this doesn’t mean that you have to wait until your star is perfectly balanced before you can practice magick. Elemental star work can take a lifetime; and sometimes you will take care of one problem area only to realize that another one has slipped and needs some more attention. Keeping your life in balance is like maintaining a really healthy and beautiful garden. A garden needs water, sunlight, weeding, critter control, and more—and all these things have to happen when they’re needed and in balance. You can’t expect a great garden if you do a great job weeding but never provide any water, and you can’t have a wonderful life or do powerful magick if you regularly ignore some of the elements.

If the star is helpful to you, do it at least once or twice a year and compare each one to the previous drawings. That way you can see at a glance whether you are progressing. The ideal is to answer the questions honestly and discover that your star is both large and well balanced. Most people who work at their spirituality and their magick discover, to their delight, that their star grows and becomes more symmetrical and beautiful as the months and years go by.

The Sacred Marriage

The preparation continues. What else must you do to become a magician, an agent of transformation? The alchemists know that you must celebrate the “sacred marriage” within, the hieros gamos. This means the acceptance and union of the yin and yang, lunar and solar, anima and animus, or so-called “feminine” and “masculine” within. “Heraclitus taught that all changes in the world arise from the dynamic and cyclic interplay of opposites, and he saw any pair of opposites as a unity. This unity, which contains and transcends all opposing forces, he called the Logos.”[1]

In alchemy this union is symbolized either by the caduceus (a pair of snakes intertwined about a central staff, now used as a symbol of the medical profession and thus, in theory, of healing) or by the Sacred Androgyne, a figure depicted as half female and half male.

In the book Medicine Woman, it is symbolized by the “marriage basket” that is the object of Lynn Andrews’ quest. Agnes Whistling Elk describes it as follows:

. . . the marriage basket was conceived by the dreamers to signify the union between the high warrior and high warrioress within your own being. Every woman seeks after that high warrior, that most magnificent of men, within her. We seek him all our lives. If we’re lucky, we conjure him in our dreams, mate with him, and become whole. . . . Reach out for that high warrior waiting in the woman’s lodge. Embrace him and be free.[2]

Men, of course, would seek the “high warrioress” within. In either case, one must understand that this parable relates to an inner emotional/spiritual experience and not to any kind of “search for Mr. Right” on the material plane. Intimate relationships are vital to the fulfilled life, but those who seek fulfillment only in a relationship with another, and not within themselves, are doomed to disappointment. “The Charge of the Goddess” says, “If that which you seek you find not within, you will never find it without.”

This is where many people go wrong: they externalize an inner quest and ask another person to fill the void inside. Thus a woman might refuse to seek her “high warrior” within and look for a man to be that in her life. When he fails to live up to her dreams and ideal image, the relationship suffers. If she would first look within and accept/respect/love/express her own “yang” qualities (strength, boldness, assertiveness, resolute action, etc.), then she would not need to demand so much of her partner. He would be free to live out his concept of those qualities and to seek and express the “yin” qualities within himself.

However, at this point in history men may have a more difficult time with the sacred marriage than many women. The feminist movement has helped many women understand and express their “yang” qualities, and there is a certain amount of social acceptance developing for strong, outspoken women (it is hardly a tidal wave of admiration, but some encouragement exists). The men’s liberation movement, by contrast, seems to lag years behind. Most men are still uncomfortable with the sensitive, nurturing, receptive sides of their natures because such qualities seem “effeminate,” even though they may consciously realize that John Wayne and Rambo are unrealistic role models. Yet no one can break through the social and emotional barriers for anyone else: each man must decide whether he is willing to pay the price to become a whole person.

In summary, as long as you confine yourself to the sex roles and stereotypes dictated by society, you will be crippled magickally. When you honor and express all the aspects of yourself that are positive, no matter what the expectations of others, you grow in love, wisdom, and power. It is perhaps no coincidence that many shamans were free of tribal sex roles, and in their dress and behavior expressed the attributes of both sexes.

To be a magickal being, you must first be whole. The sacred marriage within is a giant step toward wholeness.

The Robin Wood Tarot

The Two of Cups tarot image symbolizes this idea perfectly; as you can see from the Robin Wood image above, the intertwined masculine and feminine energies (two serpents) culminate in a creative, transformative Fire (the lion) on a spiritual level (wings). It is important to understand that this occurs within an individual, as well as between a man and a woman on the material plane.

Connecting with Deity

Connecting with Deity is the personal relationship we have with a chosen deity or one who chooses us. It is also our own connection with our own divinity and the divinity in others. All spiritual paths offer this.

This connection is essential to magick. Please understand that I am not pushing any particular religion here—or, indeed, organized religion at all. What you call the “Higher Power,” and whether you worship in a grove, mosque, church, synagogue, stupa, temple, or forest, doesn’t matter to the energy flow of magick. What does matter is that your Higher Self is included in the linkage and that your Higher Self is nourished by active spirituality.

For convenience, we shall refer to the ultimate creative power as God, Goddess, or Deity/deities. You might refer to it as the Source, the Creator, Providence, Allah, Jehovah, the Divine Mother, Father in Heaven, or the Tao.

Who is Deity, or who are the gods of humanity? Do any of the following descriptions ring true to you?

• Imaginary beings created by primitive peoples as a way of coping with the unknown.
• Beings that began as imaginary, but have taken on life and personality because of the psychic energy poured into them by worshippers over generations.
• Pre-existing supernatural and immortal beings with extraordinary powers.
• Archetypes—a way of categorizing and personifying the varieties of human experience.
• Facets or aspects of an original deity who created the universe.
• Aspects of our own psyches, separated and individualized; imaginary friends on a large scale.
• Technologically advanced extraterrestrial visitors who were deified by primitive humans.
• Extraordinary human beings who were exalted and deified by their cultures after their deaths.
• Imaginary beings that were cynically created and fostered by priestly classes as a way of gaining power over others.
• Idols and false beings worshipped by the ignorant in place of the one true creator.
• Unknown and probably unknowable entities who nevertheless fill a need in the human psyche.
• The ultimate organizing principle of the universe; possibly a self-aware unified field theory.

My experience suggests that most people can connect with Deity most easily if it is visualized in human form, with a name, personality, and history. If you are a Christian, you may not truly believe that God always looks like an old man with a flowing white beard; and if you celebrate Goddess, you might not really think that she always appears as either a lovely maiden, kindly mother, or wise crone. But it helps many of us to represent Deity in forms we are familiar with.

To those who say, “There is only one true God,” I reply, “Fine; that may be so. But do you believe that God is limited to one form or appearance; and if so, do you know what it is? If not, we are free to visualize God however we please, and probably the Deity won’t mind as long as we live good lives and honor Him/Her/It.”

Perhaps you have already found your primary deity, or even made a formal dedication to their service. Or perhaps you did not choose, but were chosen; Deity sometimes calls to an individual in unmistakable terms, making “an offer you can’t refuse.”

If you have no connection to a particular image of Deity, or name, then you are free to choose whatever god or goddess of history will help you in your spiritual journey. There are more than you might dream of: have you ever heard of the Maori Taane-mahuta, the Australian Julunggul, the British Flidais, or the Thracian Zibelthiurdos? Yet these and hundreds more have much to teach us about divinity and the way different cultures understand it.

Janet Farrar and Gavin Bone call the deities “Primary Life Guides”[3] and divide them into three categories:

Primal Deities: Represent forces of nature, such as mountains, the earth, or the rain, as well as principles, such as fertility or truth.

Ancestral Deities: The gods of your nation, culture, or heritage, as well as deities that personify certain skills, such as healing or smithcraft.

Genus Loci: “Spirits of place,” or deities who personify or are linked to a specific location: a river, valley, volcano, mountain, etc.

So you might choose a god or goddess of rain, if that power of nature touches your heart, or a deity sacred to your ancestors, or one that inhabits a place that is beloved by you. Or your choice might be related to your life’s work or profession: healers may have deities who are healers, such as Brigit, Isis, Apollo, or Hygeia; and so on.

Think carefully about your relationship with the gods. How do you work with them and they with you? How does your connection manifest in your life? What do you need from the gods? What do you expect them to be or provide for you? What can you provide in return? Would you want to dedicate yourself to one deity?

But before you dedicate yourself, do lots of research; learn everything, everything, everything you can about them. Here are some ways you may begin:

• Read a book or books about your deity
• Research your deity on the Internet
• Meditate on your deity
• Do dreamwork centered on your deity
• Talk to others who have dedicated themselves to this deity
• Find or create a statue of your deity
• Find or create a painting or collage of your deity

After much thought, meditation, and soul-searching, you may choose to make a commitment to a goddess or god. This is not as simple as it sounds. When you dedicate yourself to a god or goddess, you are embracing them in their entirety. You cannot dedicate to Brigit as goddess of healing without also accepting her roles as sovereign, source of inspiration, and smith. Odin is magick and the mystery of the runes, but he is also self-sacrifice. Most goddesses and gods actually represent several facets of Deity; very few are simply one quality personified, such as Love, Honor, or Wisdom.

If your spirit demands that you proceed, then create a dedication ceremony. It can be simple or elaborate, but it should come from the heart. In brief outline, it might include:

• Preparing yourself by cleansing and fasting
• Dressing in appropriate costume, robe, or colors
• Creating an altar special to your goddess or god
• Creating sacred space
• Calling the quarters, or elements, as witnesses
• Inviting your deity to be present
• Introducing yourself to the deity
• Speaking your oath or pledge of dedication, in which you explain how you plan to be of service
• Consecrating a piece of jewelry (one that you will wear always) or a special ritual tool as a constant reminder of your pledge
• Introducing yourself to the elements in your new role
• Thanking the quarters and your deity, and opening the circle

Over time, you will discover many ways to serve your chosen god or goddess. You can:

• Create an altar or shrine for your deity
• Write a poem about your deity
• Write and use an invocation to your deity
• Write a letter to your deity
• Find or make jewelry or a talisman symbolizing your deity
• Teach a class about your deity
• Dance with or for your deity
• Find or create a chant or song for your deity
• Write a story about your deity, and share it with others
• Write a play about your deity, and gather friends to help perform it
• Create a costume of your deity, or a priest/ess outfit, if appropriate
• Create an astral temple for your deity
• Create a complete ritual to honor your deity

You may do the work of the god/goddess in the world by healing, teaching, creating beauty, or whatever your deity is known for. You can simply live your life in a way that honors the particular god or goddess. You may practice deep aspecting (deity assumption) in order to counsel and prophesy to others. You might be an advocate for a particular god or goddess, bringing their special wisdom or energy wherever it is lacking.

Continue to strengthen your relationship. Your first connection to Deity may have happened in an instant, in a flash of insight, or it may have grown slowly over several years. In either case, it may take the rest of your life, or several lives, to really explore the relationship in depth.

The closer you draw to the Divine, the more your life and the lives of those around you will be enriched, the more powerful your magick will be, and the more wisely you will use it.

At first glance, this kind of personal work may seem to have little to do with magick. Yet you cannot become a strong and wise adept unless you first grow as a strong and wise person. Beyond any question of magickal prowess, it is true that such growing will make your life deeper and richer even if you choose never to practice the Art.

Must you achieve perfection before you practice magick? Of course not. Your personal growth, like your magick, is part of a lifelong journey.

Exercises Toward Mastery

1: The Elemental Star

Complete the elemental star exercise as described in this chapter. Make a plan to work on your weakest element. Use the blank star charts in appendix VIII or make a copy and place the completed exercise in your magickal journal or Book of Shadows so that you can compare the results with the next time you do the exercise.

2: The Sacred Marriage

Write down a list of qualities you consider feminine. Now make another list of qualities that you think of as masculine. Looking at each quality, ask yourself whether you know men who exhibit the so-called feminine ones and women who exemplify the masculine ones. Now examine your own character and personality: do you fit neatly into your expected role, or do you follow a middle path that allows you the freedom to explore any facet of your personality? If you have a teacher, ask them to lead you in a guided meditation where you meet your inner Warrior or Warrioress, your inner Hero or Heroine, your inner Sage or Crone.

3: Your Image of the Divine

Write down how you imagine Deity or the Divine. Describe how you imagine its qualities, powers, and appearance. In what ways is this image helpful to you? In what ways does it limit you or draw too narrow a picture of the Divine? Describe a different way in which you could visualize it. What would happen if you were to work with Deity using this different image?

4: Connecting with Deity—Invocation

Use this formula to write an invocation to ask a god/goddess to be present in your life or to help you achieve a goal:

• List three things that your deity represents to you (three attributes, gifts they bring to you, things you associate with them).
• Name one thing you would like them to help you with now.
• Write a short invocation.

Example: “Artemis, goddess of freedom, the open sky, and all outdoors, grant me your aid in finding a new job that allows me more freedom and creativity. For this great gift, I thank you. Blesséd be!”

Use this short prayer/affirmation/invocation often. When you use it, open your root, heart, and crown chakras; give a small offering at your altar; and act in accord.

Alternate goal: ask them to be present in your life and guide you.

5: Connecting with Deity—Journal

Create a god/goddess journal or scrapbook. Look for pictures, stories, images, symbols, and objects that relate to deities you connect with or want to get connected with. To this book, add your personal experiences when invoking deities in ritual.

Blesséd be.

To follow this path further, read:

Toward a Recognition of Androgyny by Carolyn Heilbrun (W. W. Norton & Co., reissued 1993)

The Magical Personality: Identify Strengths and Weaknesses and Improve Your Magick by Mike Leslie (Llewellyn, 2002)

The Way of Four: Create Elemental Balance in Your Life by Deborah Lipp (Llewellyn, 2004)

Androgyny: Toward a New Theory of Sexuality by June Singer (Anchor Press, 1977)

[1] Heraclitus of Ephesus, Greek philosopher, sixth century BCE, quoted in The Tao of Physics by Fritzjof Capra, 6–7.

[2] Lynn V. Andrews, Medicine Woman (HarperSanFrancisco, 1983), 157.

[3] Janet Farrar and Gavin Bone, Progressive Witchcraft (Franklin Lakes, NJ: New Page Books, 2004), 197.