It’s two o’clock in the afternoon by the time we leave the courthouse. Nico’s mom said she’d get a ride with Laurel so Nico could keep the car. Today is a special occasion. We drive through town, past the library, around the cliffs, and down to the beach. The morning was overcast and chilly, but the clouds have parted now. It’s funny how you can wake up expecting one thing but it can all change by the end of the day.
School’s out now and Nico’s phone has been blowing up with texts ever since sixth period ended. Jared and Tess. His friends—our friends—wanting to know how things went today. When we get back to my street, Nico parks in front of the school instead of my house.
“Come with me real quick. I just need to grab something from my locker.”
I follow him up the steps and down the hallway. Past the lockers and the posters and the smelly walls.
We end up in front of the cafeteria door. He opens it wide, ushering me inside, where the scent of grease and fried food lingers.
“What are we doing?” I ask.
“Look closer.”
The whole film club is at a table in the corner. Now I know each of them by their favorite movie and their favorite karaoke song.
“You’ve always wanted to go to the cafeteria.” Nico tosses me a satisfied smile. “So here we are.” We move closer and I see there’s a carton of Neapolitan ice cream, bowls, and spoons. Plus confetti stars sprinkled across the table. Everyone stands and claps when Nico and I walk up.
“You’re the shit,” Tess says. “Seriously.” She locks her pinkie finger with mine, then pulls me into a hug. “Congratulations, Juniper.”
“You’re like my hero,” Jared says. “For real. Someone needs to make a movie about you.”
I manage to mumble, “Thanks,” as I’m torn between focusing on this celebration here and what awaits me at home.
Tess hands me a spoon. “We didn’t know what flavor you liked best, so we got all three.”
“Strawberry,” I say, sitting down.
Jared puts his arms out like he’s a bouncer assigned to crowd control. “The strawberry section belongs to Juniper, so back off.”
“Dude, we’re good,” Nico says. “Nobody’s gonna fight her over it.”
“Everyone fights over the strawberry ice cream at my house,” I say. “My dad makes it from scratch.”
“That’s so cool,” Tess says. “I love homemade ice cream.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty cool,” I say. I dig my spoon into the ice cream and take a bite. It’s not even close to as good as my dad’s, but I didn’t expect it to be.
Tess says, “We figured you should get to celebrate your victory at the best table with the coolest people. Really, it’s the only table you need to know when you start school here.”
“After you get your shots, you can eat lunch with us every day,” Jared says.
“Probably not,” I say.
“What do you mean?” Tess asks.
I take another bite of ice cream. “My parents don’t believe in public school any more than they believe in vaccinations. And even after I get my shots, I won’t be able to enroll without their permission, because I’m a minor.”
Nico huffs. “Sounds like another battle for Laurel.”
“Right? Do you think she’d work pro bono for me again?”
“Wait,” Tess says, her spoon frozen in midair. “You did everything you did to get your vaccines and you still can’t even go to school like you want to?”
I shrug. “Pretty much.”
“Well, that sucks.”
“Yeah.”
“You’ve got time to figure it out,” Nico says, bumping my shoulder with his. “Maybe try for next year.”
“You’re better off coming in as a senior anyway,” Jared says around a mouthful of chocolate ice cream. “Sophomore and junior years are like the middle-child years of high school. You’re not a shiny new freshman and you’re not a senior getting ready to graduate. Sophomores and juniors are just kind of … there.”
“Good to know,” I say, smiling.
I spend the next hour trying not to think about what’s waiting for me at home. I try to eat and talk about court and movies, but I can’t help but worry about what Poppy will say to me when I walk through the front door. Or if my parents will say anything at all.
It’s probably better that everyone eventually decides it’s time to head out. For homework and family dinners and guitar lessons. Nico holds my hand as we stroll down the hallway, past the lockers, and through the school. I want to be able to imagine being here next year. Saying good-bye at separate classrooms, then meeting up again for lunch, where we’ll sit with the film club. But I know there’s a lot more work to be done to make that a reality.
Outside, the sun is setting, bruising the sky in bursts of pink and purple.
The JROTC wears fatigues and stands in salute as the flag is lowered at the end of what has been a long and momentous day. For me, at least.
Nico and I linger at the bottom of the steps of the school.
“I’m proud of you,” he says.
“I’m proud of me, too.”
He wraps me in a hug. And when he kisses me, everything else falls away. He tastes like vanilla ice cream and smells like winter. When he stops to come up for air, I pull him back to me so we can kiss some more.
As much as I don’t want to, I know I have to go home.
So I do.
Nico walks me across the street and asks if I want him to come inside.
“No,” I say, because I know it isn’t the right thing right now. Not for him. Not for me.
So I kiss him one last time and watch as he drives away.
I stand on the sidewalk for a moment after he’s gone. I wait and watch the shadows of my family inside my house. Until Poppy suddenly bursts from the front door, startling me from my stupor. She talks over her shoulder, then shuts the door behind her. I watch as she sits on the front porch, book in hand, opening to where she left off reading.
“Hey,” I say, from the end of the front walk.
She purses her lips. “Hey.”
I walk forward. Sink down next to her. “Am I still allowed inside?”
“Possibly,” she says. “Mom made dinner and actually set a place for you.”
“Okay.” I pull my jacket tighter, protecting myself from the cold bite of winter air. “That’s something at least.” Poppy feigns reading, but I can feel her watching me. I eventually stand up and brush off the back of my skirt. “I might as well go see what’s waiting for me.”
Poppy stands up, too. Shuts her book. “Do you want me to come in with you?”
I’m deeply touched by her offer. It gives me hope. “Only if you want.”
She moves forward, standing closer to me. “Let’s go.”
I nod and brace myself.
Poppy twists the knob. Opens the door. Goes inside.
I hover on the threshold. I can see my mom and dad in the living room. They turn when they see me, their faces mixed with emotions. But also relief. Like they were afraid I might not come back at all and they’re glad I actually did.
I can smell dinner simmering on the stove.
I can see through the living room to the kitchen. To the table set for all five of us. For my whole family.
I take one step and then another, until I’m through the front door, too.
Until I’m home.