Dahlia sucked down a harsh breath, crashing back into the present, the horror of what she’d seen still clinging to her skin as the colors faded overhead.
Nikolai was braver than she’d ever comprehended. The sacrifices he’d made greater than she’d imagined.
Every lash had split her skin as if it were her back. Every drop of his rage and shame had burned into her flesh, joined alongside the fear he hadn’t wanted to admit to himself.
No wonder he was so hard now. No wonder he was filled with such darkness. No wonder his pride was so important to him.
He’d been stripped of it far too often when he’d been young.
“What the fuck was that?”
Her feet hit the ground hard as he put her down and staggered back.
Out of reach.
As if he feared her touch.
“That is not the fucking vision I need you to have.” His chest rose and fell with each harsh drag of air.
“I can’t choose what I see. Apparently, neither can you.” She sounded defensive, but the pain of his fourteen-year-old self still crawled through her. “You’re the one pushing me to have the visions in the first place.”
“Not that one.” Something that looked almost like hate shimmered in his gaze.
“You have nothing to be ashamed of.” She took a step toward him. “What you did was courageous. Your siblings—”
“Say a fucking word about this to them, or anyone else, and I’ll make your earlier punishment seem like a cakewalk.”
She reared back. “I thought . . .” We were softening toward one another.
“You thought what?” Cruelty coated his voice. “That tight little cunt of yours would turn me so easily into an Alpha bitch that I would welcome you rooting around in my past? Think again.” His expression hardened. “It’s past time to see your father’s sins, not mine, and I’m growing impatient. Your sister may be off the table as leverage, but she’s not the only person you care about.”
His threat stung more than his previous ones.
She knew he was lashing out in anger and shame, but it didn’t lessen the savagery of his words or her powerlessness in the face of them.
That was her fault for beginning to expect something better. For letting lust cloud her mind. For tricking herself into thinking his seductive words and false kindness were anything but ploys to get her to fall in line. For imagining that the warm glow pulsing through the strands of the fated-mate bond was anything more than her own wishful thinking.
There was no one more ruthless than Nikolai Skolov, after all.
He would never see her as anything but his property to be used as he required.
She was a fool to have ever forgotten that. “I wish to return to my hospital room.”
“Too bad.” He stared down at her. “I issue the commands. If you think what you saw makes me weak, think again.” He wrapped his hands around her arms and yanked her close. “We are going to dinner. You will forget what you saw. We will go on like this vision never happened. You understand me, omega?”
She nodded, but the truth was, she wouldn’t be able to forget.
Not his cruelty or the foolish sense of betrayal slicing through her chest.
Or her horror and awe at what he’d willingly endured.
If she’d ever doubted his determination to do whatever it took to protect those he loved, she didn’t anymore.
The Skolov crime boss might be a ruthless Alpha beast, but he hadn’t been born that way.
He’d been made, molded by shame and rage and each horrific brutal thing that had been done to him by her family.
Now that she knew his secrets, he only hated her more.
And that was the real tragedy.
Since knowing those same secrets only lessened her hate and left her bleeding with the desperate craving to comfort him.
But that wasn’t the Alpha-omega exchange, and it certainly wasn’t their dynamic.
She needed to stop imaging it could be any other way.
“Let’s go.” Swiveling her around, Skolov pointed down the corridor, his voice stripped of all the warmth and teasing of earlier. “Servants are waiting for you in that dressing room with the clothes you will wear. You have twenty minutes to bathe and dress. Otherwise, I’m coming in.”
Her heart beat fast.
Was it silly to mourn something she’d never really had?
Squaring her shoulders, she marched in the direction he’d commanded. A few moments to pull herself together would be welcome. She had no idea what was coming next, but she was determined to be ready. His past and her future were linked, but it seemed increasingly clear that only one of them would survive the battle coming.
Shame as thick and black as dirty sludge coated Nikolai’s veins as the clink of silverware echoed through the luxurious dining room.
The emotion wasn’t coming from his omega through the fated-mate bond. No, this remorse was all his own.
He’d prepared for every fucking thing when it came to his omega, except his idiotic reactions.
Shoveling another forkful of tasteless food into his mouth, he forced himself to swallow.
The silence was deafening, despite the presence of his three brothers, Anya, and his omega gathered around the long, rectangular crystal dining table. He hadn’t expected anyone else to be here. He should have remembered Maxheim had instituted a family dinner hour. He was usually so busy he worked right through it.
Frankly, if it was always this quiet, he was glad he’d missed them.
He allowed himself a single glance across the expanse of the long table to where he’d designated his omega sit. Her hair was more golden now that it was wet—the reason the heat in the room was cranked higher than usual—and her head was bowed as she toyed with her food. She looked gorgeous in a navy cloak accented with fur and a simple blue gown that matched her eyes. He hadn’t specified that color or dress, though he had requested long sleeves and a high neckline—as much for his own sanity as for her comfort in the compound’s colder temps.
Maxheim sat to her right, cutting his meat with surgical precision. Nikolai suspected his brother was not happy about getting kicked out of his spot at the head of that side of the table, especially by someone who was their family’s greatest enemy.
Maxheim hadn’t said a word about it though. Like always. He’d been that way ever since he lost the female he loved. He kept it all bottled up inside and focused on familial duty to the exclusion of all else, including himself.
Which was why Nikolai suspected it was the others who were more likely to present a problem. Alexi’s mocking stares were really starting to irk while Damien simmered with barely controlled rage.
Tough shit.
Nikolai wasn’t feeling too at ease himself right now.
When he’d stormed into the dining room and seen everyone already gathered around the table, he’d reasoned that distance from the omega was the smartest plan.
Now he wished she was pinned to his side so he could . . . what? Fix things?
He was a fucking fool. And an idiot.
He knew she couldn’t control what she saw . . . but the exposure still burned in his gut like a hot poker.
He’d expected to take that particular set of sins to the grave.
Now the person he most wanted to see him as powerful knew exactly how low he’d sunk.
Equally bad was the memory of how, for a few heartbeats before he fucked it up, her gaze had been warm and welcoming, the golden glow flowing from her to him along the deepening fated-mate bond making him feel lighter than he had in ages—until the vision and his knee-jerk angry reaction messed everything up.
He’d struck out, wanting to prove he was strong, despite what she’d seen.
All he’d done was prove what an asshole he really was.
Her hurt and confusion whispered to him along the fated-mate bond.
“Nikolai, I’ll need your okay to proceed with a new arms shipment. The buyer wants them immediately.” As predicted, Maxheim’s feathers might be ruffled, but he never let it stand in the way of business. “I’m thinking double our usual price since they want it so bad.”
“I’ll take a look at the particulars and get back to you tonight.”
“I want to discuss retaliation for the witness killings by Lundin.” Damien’s voice was hard, his stare locked on Dahlia as he spoke. “My men and I are ready and willing to take the whole dirty Lundin crew down.”
The omega’s fork clattered to the table.
“Shut it, Damien.” Nikolai’s words were a savage growl. “That’s not up for discussion here. Or anywhere, for that fucking matter. If you can’t understand that, leave the room.”
He watched his omega pick up her fork and felt a little better.
Damien growled but remained in his seat, shoveling a forkful of meat into his piehole.
Nikolai still wasn’t sure how Olan had pulled off the hits, and something about it was definitely rubbing him the wrong way, but his sources were saying that the killings in the Brotherhood stronghold had pissed off a lot of the other members and made them more suspicious of Olan Lundin. The last thing Nikolai wanted to do was lose the advantage by blatantly upping the war between him and Lundin.
He had every intention of retaliating, but he planned to be far smarter about it than Olan.
“Moving on.” Ever the fixer, Maxheim swiped at the small comms device he’d placed next to his plate. “I’ve identified a new planet with potential for a Skolov luxury resort and casino city. I want to show you the specs.”
“Sounds good.” He’d missed a lot in the hours he’d been busy fucking his omega. Fact was, he hadn’t noticed the passing time. For once in his miserable life, his mind hadn’t been solely focused on business or revenge.
It had been . . . nice. Better than nice, actually. It had been amazing.
He cast another glance at his omega.
Head down, she was still toying with her food, without a single bite actually sliding between her lips.
He stifled a growl and opened his mouth to tell her to eat.
“The Stormhart rep called about a discounted shipment deal.” Alexi spoke before he could, and Nikolai didn’t miss how Damien went still across the table. Or how the kid’s eyes bled to the red of rut at only the mention of the family name. Hells, his brother’s forbidden obsession with a contracted Stormhart omega hadn’t lessened in the least, despite the fact that Damien had his shot with her and come up short. Didn’t seem as if he was taking the rejection well. That was a situation definitely worth watching.
“I say fuck ‘em.” Alexi was still talking. “We shouldn’t have to give them shit for the little bit of intel they’re throwing our way.”
Nikolai mined for patience. Alexi was as bad as Damien. “They have to give the appearance of impartiality or it won’t look good for any of us. Tell them the cargo is already on the way. We’ll send someone to pick up the funds.”
“I’ll handle it.” Damien’s sudden show of cooperation was suspect. Nikolai would have preferred to keep the kid away from any Stormharts, but clearly, that wasn’t going to happen. Maybe Damien seeing the omega contracted and bred to someone else would drive home that it was over once and for all.
“Fine.” Nikolai refocused on the fact that no one had yet to speak a word to his omega. Not even Anya.
His irritation grew—until he recalled that he hadn’t either.
Shit. As head Alpha, it was his job to lead and everyone else to follow. They took their cues from him, and what they saw now was his fury and barely leashed aggression.
Except before this last miserable cluster fuck of a vision, he’d been feeling anything but hostile toward his omega, and he’d been getting the feeling she was warming to him, too.
A development that had been balls-tingling amazing. And way over-fucking-due.
Until he screwed it up.
“There’s an issue at one of the off-planet drop sites,” Maxheim spoke up once more. “Crates of product are missing.”
Fucking Lundin. Nikolai’s gaze flickered briefly to his brother before returning to his omega. “The usual troublemaker?”
“I’m not sure. I want your go-ahead before I investigate.”
“Investigate.” Nikolai emphasized the single word, his gaze on Damien. “No disappearing bodies until we know who’s behind it. The Brotherhood is watching us closely.”
Jaw tight, Damien nodded.
“I’ll need your approval too.” Anya spoke for the first time, her gaze shifting between the food at the end of her fork and her eldest brother. It wasn’t like her to be so timid, but then again, she was still in trouble for her visit to the dungeons and was probably pretending to toe the line for a little while longer. Nikolai was sure it wouldn’t last long. He’d always thought her bold nature was odd for an omega and would cause her problems later on, but now he was beginning to see he hadn’t a clue. Because there was likely some poor bastard out there right now who was going to like Anya’s defiance as much as Nikolai liked his omega’s feisty spirit.
One who would realize, if he were smarter than Nikolai, that he needed to do whatever it took not to crush it.
“I’d like to run a fundraising effort related to one of the nearby moons.” Anya was still speaking. “It’s still radioactive from the last idiotic Federation spill, and I think being a part of the cleanup could earn us some good PR points.”
“Give me the usual paperwork and I’ll look into it.”
Maxheim tapped his comms. “I’ll also need—”
“Enough!” Nikolai slammed his fist on the table.