Sam
I’ve had two glorious days off work after a six shift stint. Two days that included me sleeping off a rather large hangover in Helen and Rico’s guest room for half a day, then the other half of yesterday was spent having a mental health day on my couch watching television cop dramas. Yeah, I know. Don’t ask!
Now, it’s my second day off, my last before I return to work, and wouldn’t you know it, I can’t sleep in for the life of me. It’s 10 a.m. and I’ve been up for at least a few hours. First, I put on my running gear and go to work out in Lincoln Park. Then I grab a cleansing smoothie from my favorite café and get home thirty minutes later, planting myself on the wooden stool at my kitchen counter to read the newspaper. I know I can read it online, and a lot of people probably do, but there is something about the smell of a broadsheet newspaper … the smudging of the newsprint on your fingers, the folding of page after page giving you that indescribable smell that’s full of memories, moments in time you’ll never forget.
From my place in my small kitchen, I start hearing a weird vibrating type noise coming from my bedroom. I have a moment of sheer horror flash before my eyes then I remember that
a) I live alone.
b) I’m a thirty-two year old woman, so who the fuck cares that I have three vibrators, one vibrating egg, and a vibrating pair of underwear that Helen bought me on a dare.
c) I didn’t use my sex toy collection last night because I fell asleep on the couch in the middle of Castle.
d) The noise is not going away by me sitting here considering all the different vibrating toys I have in my top right drawer.
Right …
I jump up and run into my bedroom just as the noise stops. What the fuck! Now I’ll never know. I scan my room for anything suspicious and come up empty.
Then the noise starts again. I drop to my hands and knees, crawling around looking for the source of the ghost vibration, and giggling because now I’m thinking of what happens to sex toys after they die.
Helen would have a field day with this conversation.
I realize the sound is coming from my bed, so pulling back the comforter to an empty bed, I lift my pillows to find my phone vibrating like a kid at Christmas. I lunge for the phone and roll over onto my back at the same time, feeling pretty good about my ability to answer the call and do a side roll at the same time.
“Hello?”
“Sam, is that you?” I hear a deep male voice rumble down the phone. My heart stutters for a minute before he continues. “It’s Ryan. Sorry, did I disturb you? I called before, but there was no answer.”
I let out the breath I was holding in. Why was I suddenly hoping it was Sean? Why would Sean ring me anyway?
Oh shit, Ryan’s waiting. “Hey, Ryan, sorry, how are you feeling?”
“I’m a little better.”
“That’s great, Ry. Glad to hear it,” I reply, not hiding my happiness at his recovery. He definitely had me worried last time I saw him at the hospital. Unfortunately, it wasn’t his physical recovery I was most worried about.
“Yeah. Hey, listen … I’m at the hospital and they’re discharging me today. I need a favor.”
A lot of thoughts rush through my head. What if he wants me to look after him? Or needs me to do something illegal? Would he ask me to do something illegal? It’s bad enough that he told me in very vague terms that the break in at the club was most likely just something made to look like a robbery. What’s done is done though, and if I have information pertaining to a crime that may or may not have taken place, as an officer of the law it’s my duty to pass that information on. Which is exactly what I’ll do in the morning when I go and speak to the detectives investigating the case.
“You still there, Sammy?” he asks when I go silent.
“Yeah, Ry, just waiting to hear what you need.”
“I hate to ask but …” he hesitates, making me more anxious. I don’t realize that I’m gripping the phone tightly until the plastic exterior starts digging into my skin. “Um, are you able to give me a ride from the hospital? I, uh, I can’t ring Sean and I, uh, haven’t got my wallet or keys on me because everything was at the club when I got brought in.”
Oh, thank you, Lord!
“Oh, sure, Ryan. Of course. What time do you need me?”
“An hour? Is that okay?”
“Absolutely. I’ll see you in the waiting room in about an hour then?”
His voice loses its tightness and he’s back to sounding relaxed and worry-free (for the moment anyway). “Thanks, Sammy. I knew I could count on you.”
“See you soon, Ry.” I end the call and drop my phone onto my pillow beside me. Am I living in some alternate dimension all of a sudden?
Is this like Lost Season 6 where there was a parallel universe and there are really two Sams? ’Cause if there are and she’s in the past … god, there is some advice I’d like to give Alternate Sam on her future and the decisions she’s due to make.
For our first date, Sean had told me to wear something comfortable. It was a Saturday lunch date and he’d told me nothing about his plans, so I’d dressed in a pair of tight, black, hip-hugging jeans and a white graphic tee that I’d picked up from a vintage store a few weeks earlier. I finished off the look with a rainbow colored scarf draped once around my neck with the ends hanging down. Hey, cut me some slack, it was 2003 you know!
Sean arrived a few minutes early, knocking on my dorm room door just before lunch. When I opened the door to greet him, I had to take a few moments to catch my breath. He’d gelled his hair into a sexy as hell faux hawk and had paired a crisp green polo shirt with a pair of loose fitting khaki pants. Think Justin Timberlake in his early solo days and you’d be right on the money. Suddenly I wasn’t feeling nervous about the date, but I was keen to race out the door before my best friend and roommate Helen could see him and start drooling. And to be honest, I wanted to be seen in public with the man who looked like sex on legs.
You see, having been avidly pursued by Sean for the weeks beforehand, I was excited about the date. In fact, I’d been a bouncing hot mess of anticipation all week. Helen was about ready to lace my water with downers just to get me off my high. But nothing was bringing me down, not even calls from my mother wondering why I had only gotten an A- on a term paper could dull my shine.
“Bye, Helen,” I called out to her from the doorway.
“Hey slapper, wait a minute. I want to check out that fine piece of … oh, shit! Hi.” Her face turned a hilarious shade of bright red as she rounded the door to come face to face with a now grinning Sean Miller.
“Hi. Helen is it?” he said, holding out his hand to hers. Even at twenty-two, Sean was all about manners and treating others right. It was the old fashioned values that his grandparents had instilled in him, following the foundation built by his parents before they died.
“Y-Yes. Hi. Sorry, I suffer from a debilitating condition called verbal vomit. Don’t hold it against me. Well, unless you want to …”
I whack her arm and laugh. “Helen!” I chastise but still can’t stop laughing. “Sorry, Sean, let’s get out of here before her condition worsens.”
“Bye. Have fun, children. Don’t rush home.” She smiled a shit eating grin, all the while waggling her eyebrows at me before I scoffed and shut the door behind us.
When we reached street level, Sean grabbed my hand and entwined his fingers in mine. Such a simple, straightforward, everyday gesture but it got the butterflies in my stomach excited all over again.
“Do you mind walking for a bit?” he asked assuredly. There is one thing that Sean never showed the world, and that was uncertainty. He was always so black and white, yes or no, left or right. It’s one of the things that made me give in to this date. He was stubborn and tenacious like a dog with a bone. He would not let up until I relented and agreed to a date.
We walked for about ten minutes, stopping outside Shedd Aquarium. “Oh, wow. Is this where we’re going?” I asked excitedly.
He chuckled and pulled my hand, drawing my body in close to his. “I wanted to wow you with a first date you’d never forget. First stop, the aquarium,” he replied with a smile.
“This is awesome. I’ve never been.” I couldn’t stop grinning as we walked inside, Sean paid for our tickets and we spent the next two hours exploring the stunning sea creatures and exhibits.
By the time we walked out, it was nearing 3 p.m. and my stomach was growling loudly. Embarrassing! Thankfully Sean was one step ahead of me, leading me into a Mexican restaurant nearby.
“I hope you like some heat,” he murmured suggestively as he pulled out a chair for me.
“Well, how hot can you handle it, Sean?”
Pushing in my chair, he bent down low until his breath fanned over my ear. “I want it as hot as you can give me.” I clenched my thighs as my breathing became stuttered and the room turned into an inferno.
Thankfully, a waiter interrupted our verbal foreplay, but the seed had been planted.
When he walked me to my door a while later, I was reluctant to end our date. The conversation flowed effortlessly, the sparks between us were strong and addictive, and every time I looked at the man I wanted to jump his bones.
Standing at my door, I turned around. “Thank you for this afternoon. I had an awesome day with you.”
Lifting our still joined hands, he pulled me toward his body, wrapping his other arm around my back and holding me close against him. Gasping in shock, his eyes bored into mine, piercing me in place with such passion that I was speechless. When his gaze dropped to my mouth, I was done for. No one else mattered at that moment. It was just Sean and I standing outside my door, about to kiss for the first time.
As he tilted his chin down and softly started to kiss me, I knew that there was no way in hell I was going to be able to say no to this man again.
I jump up off the bed, pulling my clothes off as I head into my bathroom. I turn the rainfall shower head on, one of the first things I installed when I bought my apartment, and do my daily ritual in the mirror:
1) Check for any new gray hairs. (sigh)
2) Make sure I’m not following the path of my grandmother with stray lip and chin whiskers (definitely not a family tradition I wish to follow).
When the glass fogs and the room fills with steam, I step into the shower. As I wash myself with my coconut body scrub, my mind wanders back to a time when Sean was my conductor and I was nothing but a violin in his orchestra. He’d been more than upfront with me from the beginning about his dominating ways when it came to sex. I wasn’t too surprised to be honest. It was something about the way he carried himself, the way he spoke, his voice and how it felt like it could reach inside you and play you like a puppet. We complimented each other beautifully but no more so than during sex. The man could light my body on fire like no one else. In fact, no one since has made me feel anything even closely resembling the intense passion that pulsed between us.
Without realizing it, my soapy hands had wandered, becoming acutely aware of my throbbing lady garden …
Yes, I said lady garden. Isn't it sexy?
Have you ever wondered what you’d call your vagina if you had a choice? Would you call it a name like Gretel or Elizabeth? Or would you give it a term of endearment like petal or sweetheart? Do you think like a man and call it a c*nt or a pussy? Or are you like me who had a somewhat conservative upbringing with a controlling Army mom who wouldn’t hear of anything other than ‘lady parts’ and ‘man parts’. Yes, you read that right. ‘Never let a stranger tend to your garden, Samantha’ she’d say to me. Looking back, it’s a wonder that I ever got laid.
Subconsciously, my fingers stroke over my sensitized skin as I remember all that was good about my Sean of a decade ago. The way he’d let his stubble grow a day too long and how he knew how much I loved the rasp of the coarse hair against my skin as he worked his way down my body, drawing out shudders of pleasure as I relished in the friction, the way he demanded my attention the whole time he would go down on me, how we’d lock eyes as he dove his tongue-deep inside me, how he’d make me so crazy with desire I’d scream down the walls as I rode out my climax, usually multiple times. It’s when I remember those bright blue eyes boring into me, willing me to come. The flashback is too much and my body pulses with the waves of my orgasm as it crashes over me. God damn. Even in my mind Sean is just as good as he always was. I think my fortified willpower when it comes to strong, domineering men might be under attack.
I make a mental note to ring Tanner and arrange to meet up with him one night this week.
Once I’m dressed and ready to leave, I google Sean’s offices on my phone and pull up his number before pushing send and walking out my door to my parking garage.
“Sean Miller’s office. How may I assist you?” an uppity voice answers.
“Hi. I need to speak to Sean,” I say quickly, sounding slightly more irritated that I want to be, but me and uppity don’t work well together. Miss Bouncy Bones (new name) replies, “Sorry, but Mr. Miller is working from home today. Can I take a message to give him tomorrow?”
“No, that’s okay. It’s Sam Richards from CPD. Just wanted to check in after the break in the other day. No doubt one of the detectives on the case will contact Mr. Miller once they’ve concluded their investigation. Thanks though.” I hang up the phone so damn fast that her ear might have gotten whiplash.
Fuck! I check my watch and see that I’m running late after the extended shower session. I put my car into gear and head toward the hospital, still not sure whether getting involved in the life of the Miller men is a smart move or not.
Once bitten, twice shy.
At least one good thing came from this morning.
Now I know where I can take Ryan.