Chapter 1

We lay in ambush on the Laguna Madre, just below the lip of the great open basin of Corpus Christi Bay. There were two of us, in two small outboard skiffs, rented Boston Whalers. I was wearing my wetsuit top, which warmed the air around my torso but left the rest of my body vulnerable to the early morning chill. On the Gulf side of Padre Island the sun had begun to appear, backlighting the dune grass with a rose-colored band that followed the horizon to the ends of vision. The shallow inland water was as still as a glacier, though as I lay on my back in the boat, my feet slung in the steering wheel and my head resting on a hundred and fifty feet of carefully coiled net, I could feel a gentle, rhythmic swell beneath me, like the shallow breathing of a sleeping person. I thought of the porpoises ranging about somewhere in this water, gliding through it with concern and grace.

We were here to capture two of these porpoises and take them back to Port Aransas, where we would train them to perform tricks. This was my job, what I had come home for. I wish I could believe that the misgivings I felt that morning were more profound, or at least more emotional, than they actually were. In fact my misgivings were merely practical: I simply could not believe it was possible to extract a porpoise from this water, and I was impatient for us to fail. The lagoon was as lusterless and tranquil as if it had never been visited by a living thing. It seemed to me we would have better luck trying to snare high-flying birds from the sky.

I had some feeling, of course, for the creatures themselves, some notion of the general vulgarity of animal training, but I was willing to lay these considerations aside in the improbable event that we succeeded. I was not stupid—I did not believe we were doing the porpoises a “favor,” as Canales had told me, by giving them the opportunity to refine their intelligence under our direction. But I did not want to take an extreme position the other way. I just wanted to live in the world again. So I lay in the boat with my head on the net, which was studded with the remains of long-dead sea creatures. The dry husk of a crab scratched my cheek, and I breathed in the rich, pungent smell of living things that have corroded in salt air.

When I closed my eyes, lulled by the almost imperceptible movement of the boat, I encountered a disquieting image, so sharp and insistent it must have come from memory, though I did not “remember” it in the normal way. A man in a boat skipper’s hat was standing on a pier with an odd grin on his face and an oversize rod and reel in one hand. The other hand hovered tentatively above the dorsal fin of the creature hoisted upside down beside him—a porpoise, hanging by its flukes, the carcass enmeshed in rope, bleeding from the spiracle and from a gaff wound in the broad forehead. It was a still image, as from a photograph, but the man’s smile, though stationary, grew grim and urgent the more I focused on it, and his hand seemed to be trying to move away from the thing he had killed.

“You asleep?” Canales said from the other boat.

“No,” I muttered, though the image had been so vivid I thought perhaps I was. I looked over at Canales, lifting my head a little to clear the low gunwale of the skiff. The sun was up now: it gleamed on the mounting of his solitary shark’s tooth necklace.

“I don’t know what’s keeping Dude,” he said. “You might as well go to sleep if you want. If he doesn’t get here soon you might as well sleep all day. Damn porpoises’ll be all the way up the channel.”

“He’ll show up,” I answered, but Canales was not reassured. I had never known Mr. Granger to be on time, but he was never late enough for it to make a difference. In another person this sort of timing might have been calculated, but in his case I’m fairly certain it was not—some internal knowledge impelled him to show up, in all innocence, at that precise moment when his presence would be most appreciated.

Canales sat up in his tiny boat, impatiently picking bits of carapace from the net and dropping them into the water. His wetsuit—a pale blue custom model with yellow stripes along the arms—was unzipped to the sternum so that a sun-bleached tuft of hair was visible, and above it the necklace with its single serrated tooth. He had a trim black mustache and a glossy, well-tended head of hair that looked like a detachable shell; but his good grooming, set against this featureless land- and seascape, only made him seem conspicuous and uncomfortable.

I hardly knew him at all. Mr. Granger had introduced us as soon as I arrived two days earlier, but Canales had been so busy seeing to the construction of the pool, to the procurement of the equipment we needed, and to a last-minute bureaucratic snag with his permits from the Marine Mammal Commission that we had done little more than shake hands.

“You’ve never worked with porpoises before,” he had said, “is that right?”

“That’s right.”

“You know something about them, though? You know they’re mammals, for instance—that they breathe air?”

“Sure.”

He looked relieved. “You’d be surprised how many people don’t. I imagine you’ll be all right. Anyway, Dude wants you in, and it’s his money.”

Canales’ contribution to the project was his expertise. He had worked with porpoises before at Sea Park in California, and after that had done “some free-lancing,” and then had finally come down to Texas six months ago, casually looking for investors for a modest oceanarium he had in mind—hardly more than a subsistence operation to be built right on the water, eliminating the need for filtration systems and mammoth infusions of salt. By and by he found Mr. Granger, who was as usual looking for exotic ways to invest his corporate assets.

“What we’ve got here, Jeff,” Mr. Granger had told me about Canales, “is a man who knows his business. He’s worked with whales and seals and those—what do you call those, the ones with the tusks?”

“Walruses.”

“He’s worked with walruses. At the biggest place in the country. So I thought he just might know what he was talking about.”

I didn’t doubt Canales’ credentials, or his skill, but I sensed that Mr. Granger’s bankrolling of the project had been a lucky break, one Canales hadn’t really expected. He seemed constantly to be reining his energy in, not wanting to blow his chance.

“You want to go over it again?” he asked me now. “I don’t think we’ll have but one or two chances before the whole herd catches on to what we’re doing. Then we’ll have to start all over, way up the channel in Copano Bay or someplace.”

“I’ve got it down,” I said.

“Sure?”

“Don’t worry.” I was looking over the side of the boat, bogged down in reverie, and did not want to be disturbed. A cabbagehead pulsed along a few inches below the surface, suspended in the murky water like fruit in gelatin. A mullet slipped into the air and slapped gracelessly back into the water. The sunlight was everywhere now, in force—the island, the water, the desolate spoilbanks were all melded together into one seamless mass that quavered beneath the heavy South Texas air. The trapped air inside my wetsuit began to feel uncomfortably warm, and I wondered if it would be worth the effort to pull the thing off.

“Finally,” Canales said.

He was looking down the channel, watching Mr. Granger’s pontoon boat idling toward us. Its broad beam plowed through the still water and left a gouge that took a hundred yards to heal itself. The boat’s deck was as bare and flat as a dance floor, with a pulpitlike steering platform rising from the port side, behind which Mr. Granger sat like a prudent beginning driver. The three high-school kids he had hired to help out were standing at the bow railing, fighting over a pair of binoculars.

Mr. Granger pulled the boat out of the channel and brought it alongside the skiffs, nearly swamping us. One of the kids tossed me the bow line. I slipped a clove hitch around the rotten piling my own boat was tied to.

“How we doin’?” Mr. Granger asked from behind the steering platform. He was asking Canales, but he winked at me when he said it. As long as I had known him—and that was nearly all my life—he had always assumed some secret knowledge between us. When he had greeted me at the ferry landing two days before, there had been that same wink, but I had noticed right away that some of the old irony behind the gesture had vanished. The old man had broken into tears, sat down on the hood of his car and actually sobbed, then reached out blindly and gripped my forearm, telling me how much he had loved my parents, how he had missed them all these years. I didn’t want to hear that, but for his sake I listened and didn’t find it so unbearable.

In the past eleven years I had seen him only once. He had come to Santa Fe one spring, walked around with his hat in his hands, saying over and over in his high, womanish voice, “It’s a damn pretty place, isn’t it, Jeff?” Later he insisted on taking me and a half-dozen of my friends out to dinner. In the restaurant he had recited poems by Rudyard Kipling, and my friends had stared at him and smiled, charmed, like all good hippies, by any display of eccentricity. He stayed another day, tried to strike up conversations with the Indians on the plaza, then finally acceded to their silence and bought a grocery-bagful of expensive turquoise and silver trinkets to distribute among his friends on the coast. It was not until he was seated behind the wheel of his Seville, ready to go home, that I understood he had come all this way just to see me. I did not know what to say to him. He sat alone in his car and looked down the road, tapping the steering wheel with his fingers. He looked forward; he said, to seeing Billy the Kid’s grave in Fort Sumner on the way home. I said it was not to be missed. We shook hands and he drove off.

In those eleven years he had not once forgotten my birthday, sending me each year an ant farm, or a pair of handmade cowboy boots, or a silver overlay for my telephone receiver engraved with my name; once even a Nehru suit, which I kept for years in a box under my bed, feeling guilty whenever I thought about it.

He looked no better this morning than he had two days ago. The last six years had aged him badly. He was over seventy now, and though nothing specific had gone wrong with him he seemed to have slackened, begun to play out. His glasses were now as thick as ice cubes, and from most angles his eyes were lost in refraction. Without them his face had a sweet, vacuous look.

He was wearing an authentic Panama hat, the kind with the ridge along the crown, and one of the white suits of his own design that were made for him by the closetload by a family of tailors in Refugio he kept on retainer. I remember those suits from my earliest childhood—the coat plunging straight to Mr. Granger’s knees without benefit of style, stitched all the way down with odd, asymmetrical pockets from which he used to withdraw cheap little dime-store toys every time he came to visit.

“These three gentlemen,” he said now, indicating the high-school boys he had brought along, “are going to be helping us out today.” He introduced them more elaborately than the circumstances required, so that Canales and I were obliged to stand in our boats and reach up and shake hands with each of them over the railing.

Canales was impatient with the ceremony. “We’d better start looking now,” he said. “They’ll be coming up the channel, a pretty big group. There’s a big old male porpoise with a strange fin, sort of chopped off close to his body. It’s more triangular than your usual dorsal. Then there’s about a dozen others that travel with him.” He took a spiral notebook from a tackle box and studied it for a moment. “I’d say some time in the next twenty minutes we ought to see them.”

We climbed onto the larger boat by the ramp Canales had built along one side for hauling the porpoises aboard. I went to the stern, shielded my eyes with one hand, and looked down the channel. There was a slight wind now, and once or twice I mistook the glint of sunlight on the shallow swells for the fin of a porpoise. But the error was momentary. It had been a long time since I had last seen porpoises in this channel, but I remembered how unmistakable their appearance always was, the great bland shapes sliding out of the gray water, as startling and unwarranted as if they had burst forth from the earth itself.

Mr. Granger kept to his station at the steering wheel, joining in the reconnaissance with the binoculars. Canales was lecturing the teenagers on the bow.

“Now these animals have a blowhole right on top of their heads. That’s like their nose, that’s how they breathe. You have to keep that thing out of the water, otherwise they’ll drown just the same as us. Okay?

“All right. We’re going to net them in shallow water so all we’ll have to do is stand there and hold them up till we’re ready to load them on the big boat. Me and Jeff’ll be in the skiffs—we’ll get to them first, but as soon as you see us spread that net, you have Dude open it up all the way and haul ass to help us. I don’t want any of these animals to drown.”

All three kids nodded solemnly.

“Now when you get hold of them they’ll thrash around a little bit—hell, you would too—but you just hang on. Don’t believe it when somebody tells you they won’t bite.” Canales held his right hand out for their inspection. He had shown it to me earlier—half a dozen round, evenly spaced scars, a wound that looked like it had been put there by a factory punch. “But you just keep your hands out of their mouths and you won’t have to worry.”

“Goddamn,” one of the kids said. “First you tell us they’re practically tame. Now I find out they can bite my hand off.”

“They won’t.” Canales grinned. “I promise.”

“Shit.”

“What if they jump over the net?” another asked.

“They won’t think to do that. They’re smart as hell but some things just don’t occur to them.”

“I don’t know,” the first kid said, “this seems like a pretty half-assed operation.”

“That’s why we hired assholes like you to help us.”

“Ha ha,” the kid said flatly. I turned back to my surveillance of the washed-out horizon. Near the cut on the island side of the channel I saw a half-dozen fins break water. They rose in silence and authority out of the flat, lambent surface. They were glossy and full-bodied, from this distance a deep, deep gray. When they submerged another group surfaced among them, as if in rotation.

I could sense how profoundly alien they were, yet at the same time I felt my body give a small involuntary lurch forward, wanting to join them. I remembered then that first occasion on which I had seen them. I could not have been more than three years old, crossing with my mother on the Port Aransas ferry. She pointed toward the jetties, toward the shapes rising and spouting from the water, and said reverently, “Look, honey, those are the fish that saved your father.”

It did not occur to me now to mention my sighting to Canales. It was a private vision. He saw them soon enough anyway.

“Over there,” he said in a near whisper, as if the porpoises were some kind of fleet-footed terrestrial animals that would startle and run at the sound of his voice. “Okay, Jeff, let’s get in the boats.”

We slipped over the side again into the skiffs, untied them from the piling, but held them in place for a while with our hands. We watched as the porpoises caught up, swimming even with us in the deeper water of the channel, breaching infrequently now but with a collective rhythm it seemed the whole herd assumed responsibility for maintaining. I saw the big male with the triangular fin, the harem keeper. He was broader than the others, and looked when he breached like the overturned hull of a shallow-keeled boat.

“We’ll give them a lead before we take off,” Canales said. “Then very gradually, very slowly we’ll work our way around to the far side and try to herd them out of the channel. We don’t want to tie together yet but let’s stay real close.” He turned and looked at me with a challenging stare.

“Okay?”

“Sure,” I said.

“Remember not to fuck up.”

In his boat Canales was kneeling on one knee, his head down like a quarterback whispering a Hail Mary before the game. His concentration was unnerving, because I understood for the first time that we were going to succeed. The image rose again in my mind, the man and the dead porpoise, each with a grim, fixed smile.

When the herd was a hundred yards up the channel we started our motors, infesting the morning air with the smell of gasoline and two blue clouds of exhaust. At Canales’ signal we slipped into gear and set forth in tandem into the channel, the pontoon boat bulldozing its way through the water behind us. We swung west toward the mainland and closed in slowly upon the herd. I saw the porpoises, in reaction to our presence, drifting toward the other side of the channel. They did not seem disturbed.

Canales pointed to a little pod of three or four animals that had broken off from the main herd.

“We’ll try them,” he shouted above the noise of the boats. “Let’s tie off now.”

With the boats idling we found the ends of our nets and joined them together, so that now we were one craft.

For another quarter mile we followed the pod. They were close to the lee side of Padre Island now, feeding, rocking up and down almost in place. The main herd had moved farther north and were about to enter the bay.

Canales looked over at me in a stern, quizzical way and put his hand up in the air, ready to give the signal for us to draw apart and encircle the pod. He waited until we were about twenty yards away—the porpoises still rocking up and down like buoys, a lighter shade of gray now that we were closer to them—and lifted his arm a little higher, tensing it, then brought it down in a furious swipe. We opened our throttles at the same moment and headed away from one another to form a circle with the net. Even then the porpoises did not seem particularly alarmed, and I had made a ninety-degree arc before they bolted off toward the open water. I thought we would have no trouble closing the net ahead of them, but when I looked back for Canales I saw his boat lying still in the water, the net tangled around the propeller shaft. I cut my motor back and watched the porpoises submerge and surface again fifty yards up the channel. They were entering the bay.

“My fault,” he said. “Stupid mistake. I fed the net out on the wrong side of the motor. Totally my fault.”

Canales kicked the side of his boat a few times, but he had calmed down by the time I pulled alongside.

He seemed to want me to acknowledge his magnanimous assumption of the blame, but I said nothing. Mr. Granger anchored the pontoon boat just off the channel.

“Looks like a real mess,” he called.

Canales jumped in the water and began unraveling the net.

“You need some help?” I asked.

“No. Take a nap or something.”

I boarded my section of the net and, when I saw how long Canales was going to take, tossed out my anchor. He worked for forty-five minutes. When the net was free he climbed back up into his boat and folded it into the stern as carefully as if he were folding a parachute.

Canales consulted the spiral notebook again and threw it back into the tackle box with disgust. “They’ve probably gone out the ship channel by now,” he said. “It’s much too deep for us to set there. So much for the scientific method. Let’s head up into Aransas Bay and see what we can scare up.”

In the technical sense, Aransas Bay is not a bay at all, simply a place where the gap between the mainland and the offshore islands is wide enough to warrant a name. We threaded our way through a chain of spoil islands and picked the channel up again on the other side. It was midmorning now. One of the kids in the pontoon boat had taken off his shirt, revealing the broad pink baby-fat shoulders of a high-school lineman. I was definitely uncomfortable in my wetsuit, but I knew the water would be cold. If I took it off now I would just have to struggle into it again later.

As the morning wore on the color of the water changed from pale brown to a green that gave the illusion of clarity. But this was a surface change, a reflection of the sky. By midafternoon the water would be a vivid blue but would still not have lost its opacity. The color of the bay was a mirage—beneath the surface sheen it was always dense and murky.

We patrolled Aransas Bay for an hour without seeing anything. We were about to cross under the bridge and try Copano when two porpoises breached suddenly in our wake. They submerged and then surfaced again no farther than fifteen or twenty yards away, seeming deliberately to keep pace with us, even slowing down somewhat as we idled the boats and fastened the ends of the net together once again. They were already headed for shallow water, and we simply kept a respectful distance until the time came to spread the net. Canales gave his attack signal again. We tore away from each other at top speed, playing out the net into the circular wake. The water that had been still all morning seemed to rise up now against the intrusion: the hull of my boat smashed against each small swell it passed over, jarring my teeth.

We had already half-encircled the porpoises by the time they had grown suspicious. They rose backward out of the water with a great shivering lunge of their flukes and spiraled back in again, heading for the gap, the way out of the net that was being diminished each second. When Canales and I passed each other, closing the circle, I marveled at how neat it was: the high-speed maneuvering, the completion of the prescribed pattern provided me with an aesthetic rush. I cut the engine back and the noise it made disengaged itself and drifted like a cloud over the water. The circular wake had not yet lost its form.

Then I saw the porpoises plow in desperation into the net on opposite sides of the circle, hitting it at high speed, raising spouts of water and dragging a dozen floats down with them, and the raw edge of our handiwork began to assert itself. I sat there for a moment, hoping they would come up on their own. It seemed inconceivable that we could ever get them out.

“All right, hurry!” Canales yelled. He threw out his anchor, then stood up in the boat and signaled frantically to Mr. Granger, who was still plodding toward us in the big boat from several hundred yards away. Then Canales went over the side. His head reappeared as I was kicking off my huaraches.

“It’s deeper than I thought,” he said. “Fuck!”

I jumped far out from the boat into the water. My right foot landed on something broad and gristly, and in the next instant a terrific pain took root in my ankle. I felt the stingray slide off along the bottom of my foot, leaving its barb implanted. The pain did not subside in the slightest—it riled and inspired me. I took off for the other side of the net, to the place I had seen the porpoise strike. I felt the barb fall out as I kicked, dropping off like a scab but leaving its poison behind. Now I was having trouble breathing and my heart was beating recklessly—it seemed to be hurrying me along, wanting me to catch up with it, to fall within its wild rhythm. I did not want the porpoise to drown. Trapped in the buoyancy of my wetsuit, I felt myself moving toward the creature in the frustrating listless way one rushes toward the rescue of a loved one in a nightmare.

At last I reached the spot where the animal had disappeared. There was still a gap in the string of floats on the surface, and I could see the tension in the line that held them. I dove underwater and swam for the center of the gap, fighting against the wetsuit and feeling the sting of salt water in my open eyes, a complement to the great unwavering pain in my ankle. The visibility, of course, was very poor. I could see perhaps six inches and was not even sure anymore I was heading in the right direction. But I could feel the panic of the porpoise, its awful need for breath.

Then I saw the shape in the murky water. It was thrashing about in despair, enmeshing itself deeper into the diamond stitching of the net. I stood up and took a breath. The water came to my chest, and I worried that it would be too deep for me to support the porpoise. Nevertheless I submerged once more, planted my feet into the muddy bottom, took the animal’s agitated bulk into my arms and shoved it upward. The porpoise resisted at first, almost throwing me off, but it grew calmer the closer it got to the surface. I took another breath, lifted with all my strength, and finally the broad, blunt expanse of the porpoise’s head broke through the surface. The spiracle opened like a chasm, and the dank, hot air exploded in my face.

“You got yours?” Canales yelled from across the diameter of the net.

“Yeah,” I shouted, looking back over my shoulder. Canales’ porpoise was on the surface, lying very still, like an animal in shock beneath the jaws of a predator.

My own porpoise was quiet too, but I could feel its tension. Only its spiracle was moving now, producing an incessant distress call. Thweet Thweet. With my arms cradling the underside of the porpoise, rocking it like a baby, I began to feel light-headed. I laid my head along the creature’s back and saw daylight through a curious hole the size of a quarter in its dorsal fin.

“Ride ’em, cowboy,” Canales yelled as his porpoise tried to buck him off and submerge. I looked away, back through the hole in the fin.

The pontoon boat came alongside and two of the kids jumped into the water, startling the porpoise. I held on tight as it tried to lurch away, still hopelessly entangled in the net. When it was calm again I let the teenagers take over, though at their touch it lapsed again into panic and shook violently from side to side along the axis of its body.

Finally it was still. I gave myself to the wetsuit and floated on my back in the water. My heart was beating so rapidly from the toxin I felt I had to work to get a breath in between palpitations.

“You know you’re bleeding?” one of the kids asked.

“I stepped on a stingray.”

“No shit?”

“No shit. Remember to keep that blowhole out of the water.”

“Son of a bitch won’t let us. Wants to commit suicide.”

When I was sure the porpoise was safe I swam over to the big boat, climbed up the ramp and onto the deck. Mr. Granger looked down at my ankle with a grave, fretful expression.

“Stingray,” I explained.

“Oh, lord,” he said. “I’ve heard of people dying from that.”

“I’m all right.”

“No, you’re not, Jeff. You just lie back there. I’ll get you to a doctor.”

But my heart was beating so rapidly I couldn’t lie still, and Canales was calling for us to get the boat into position.

“You just hold on, mister,” Mr. Granger shouted back. “We’ve got a hurt man here.”

“Go ahead,” I said, “I’m fine. I promise.” I looked over at the two kids who were holding my porpoise on the surface. They had thrown their heads back and were imitating the animal’s distress calls and laughing.

Reluctantly Mr. Granger got behind the steering platform and brought the boat alongside Canales’ porpoise. The four of us hauled it up the ramp like deckhands loading an unwieldy piece of cargo. Twice on the ramp it tried to hurl its bulk back into the water, but once it was on the deck it was very still.

My porpoise was easier to board. It was not as large as the other one and allowed itself to be worked up the ramp without a struggle. But when it was on the deck next to the other porpoise it began a wild series of distress calls and slung its body back and forth with such abandon that I had to lie nearly full length across it to keep it still. My face was close to the porpoise’s face, which even in terror wore an immutable expression of serenity. Only its eyes, I thought, gave the creature away: the whites were prominent, crowding the calm brown iris, and somehow that engorged, colorless tissue conveyed an unnervingly clear picture of shock and hurt.

When it was quiet again I got up and stood over the beached form of the porpoise, saw it whole, realizing that perhaps this was something I should not be seeing at all. I remembered those sleek, mysterious shapes my mother had pointed out to me a long time ago. When their dorsal fins had rolled across the surface of the bay the forms that remained beneath the water had been unimaginable to me. Now it seemed somehow inappropriate for me to glimpse those bodies in their entirety. They looked naked and bland, like the bodies of turtles that had in some way been extracted from their shells.

I sat down beside the porpoise. My ankle was genuinely better now. The pain had centered into each of the separate barb wounds, so that what I felt was a prickly sort of discomfort. My heartbeat was settling, and I was breathing easier.

Canales squirted water from a spray can over the porpoises to keep their skin from drying out. They were still calling out to one another.

“Two pretty good specimens,” he said. “The one with the hole in her fin is a little beat up. That looks like a propeller scar right behind her dorsal.” I hadn’t noticed it: a seam like the stitching on a baseball. “The other one’s perfect. Really a nice-looking animal. Both of them are young. That’s good. A male and a female. That’s good too.”

He clapped Mr. Granger on the back. “Good work, boss. We got us a show.”

“They seem pretty shaken up,” Mr. Granger said.

“They’ll get over it. A porpoise is a very smart animal, very shrewd. They’ll catch onto what a good deal they’ve got. Free fish. Applause.”

He turned to me. “We’ll have to give you a Purple Heart. Those stingarees are nasty little animals.”

“I’m taking him to a doctor,” Mr. Granger said firmly.

“I’m all right now.” I was trying to shut out the porpoises’ distress calls, which were more intense now that the boat was moving.

“There’s a lot of poison in there yet,” Canales went on.

“I’m okay.”

“You’re the expert.”

We headed back toward Corpus Christi Bay with the two living creatures suddenly quiet now on the deck. I felt for a moment as if I was going to faint, but the spell passed and I was restored to reality. The high-school boys followed in the skiffs, gamboling with their machines in the wake of the boat. In an hour we were turning into the pass that led to Port Aransas and on out past the jetties to the wild blue water of the Gulf.