Sophie
The panic had started way before Chase had even arrived. It had started with shopping and had gotten worse by the time he had knocked on the door. The contract was what had literally sealed the deal. I did everything in my power not to shake as I signed my name on that very solid black line, and I had held it all together perfectly, until he had raised his glass and made that toast. As our glasses clinked together, I knew there was no way I would be able to take a sip of wine.
I had managed to walk away, my chest heavy, tears burning in my eyes. I had gotten out the words in time before that solid lump settled right in the middle of my throat, constricting my voice.
He, of course, agreed, letting me know he would be right there waiting for me when I returned. I practically ran across the plush carpet and into the bathroom, every step of the way fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. I closed the door behind me and leaned up against it, closing my eyes tightly.
I needed somewhere private and quiet, just in case I started to cry. I didn't want Chase to hear me. I didn't want him to know that it was his contract that had upset me. I also didn't want him to know that, right at this moment, I wasn't sure I wanted him to be out there when I returned. I tried to fight back the tears, but before I knew it, a single tear fell from the corner of my right eye, making a path for more to follow. What the hell was I even doing?
I tried to calm myself, but the more I thought about this entire situation, the more upset I became. I stepped in front of the mirror and wiped the tears from my cheeks and looked at my reflection. I was the one who had proposed everything like a business deal. I was the one who had mapped it all out. He was right, this was a transaction, nothing more. A simple exchange, if you will.
What had I really expected him to do? He's a lawyer—a very smart and successful one at that. Of course, he was going to want to protect himself; he would be stupid not to. I would be stupid not to protect myself too, but this was Chase, a man I had known my entire life and one I trusted very much. I didn't think I needed to protect myself against him.
I picked up my pressed powder compact and smoothed some on my skin, trying to get rid of the tear lines. I checked my reflection in the mirror.
Perhaps he was right and a contract would be for the best. Even though Chase was my best friend, I couldn't imagine raising a child with him. The man was a successful lawyer, but his personal life was a complete disaster. With him not wanting to be in the picture, I didn't need to worry about co-parenting. I wouldn't have to worry about someone spending their time undermining what rules I had put into place. Besides, I couldn't even begin to imagine Chase raising a child. I had seen him with his brothers’ kids; he was a nightmare.
The last time he had watched Hunter and Autumn's little girls I was called to the rescue because one of them had gotten gum in her hair and he panicked. A little ice and it came right out. I laughed at the memory. I remembered walking in the door and finding Chase with a pair of scissors and a screaming child begging Uncle Chase not to cut her hair. I smiled to myself and the memory, swallowed hard, checked over my makeup, and let out a breath. This was the right choice. He was right.
I ran my brush through my hair and shut the light off. I made my way back down the hall and walked back out into the living room. Chase was still sitting on the couch in the same place I'd left him. I walked around and sat down beside him, picking up my glass and drinking down my wine. I glanced to Chase, and the more I looked into his trusting blue eyes, the more I felt I needed to drink. I grabbed the bottle I had left on the table and poured myself another full glass, drinking that one down just as fast—if not faster than the first one. The tension in the room was so thick that I was having a hard time breathing.
He watched me as I poured my third glass of wine, emptying the remainder of the bottle into my glass. "Whoa, Soph, slow down," he said, taking my glass from me. "We have all night, sweets." He placed his hand on my thigh, giving me a squeeze.
I smiled at the nickname “sweets,” a name he had given me when we were fifteen, and one he had never let go of. I swallowed hard. My eyes burned, and the jumbled ball that sat in the pit of my stomach was making me uncomfortable. I was beyond nervous, and I suddenly wondered how on earth we were going to do this, especially if I felt this way just sitting here beside him fully dressed.
"Everything okay?" he asked. I nodded as he took my hand in his. "So how did you want to go about this?" he whispered.
I thought for a moment. How did I want to go about this? I had no clue. I figured he would have had it all figured out; he was far more experienced than I was in this department. I let out the breath I was holding and shook my head. "I dunno. Perhaps…perhaps, maybe we should kiss first." I shrugged.
"Okay, we can do that."
He stood from the couch and reached for my hands, pulling me to my feet. He pulled me closer to him. The smell of his cologne and the touch of his hand on my waist sent a chill through my body. His hand didn't remain on my waist for long because, as quickly as he touched me, he pulled his hand away as if he had been burned. Instead, he gripped my hand with his and pulled our hands between us. He leaned in, turning his head in the same direction I had turned mine. We were as awkward as we had been the first time he had kissed me, only that time he had succeeded.
"This isn't going to work," I mumbled, frustrated, placing my hand on his broad chest and pushing him away.
"Whoa, whoa, what isn't?"
"All of this...It's pointless. I mean, we can’t even share a simple kiss. How are we supposed to sleep together?"
Chase stood there staring at me. I could tell he didn't know what to say, and I didn't blame him. Finally, completely frustrated, I stepped away from Chase and walked over to the window. I looked out over the city and did my best to concentrate on anything else than the problem at hand. I heard Chase clear his throat, and I turned around in time to see Chase pull his phone from his pocket and begin dialing.
"What are you doing?"
"We, Sophie Lancaster, have a date. We are going out. Chase Malone doesn't give up this easily. You of all people should know that," he said as he typed something into his phone.
I looked at him wide-eyed. "Going out? Where are we going?"
"You'll see. Grab your jacket. Let's go," he said, making his way to the door, slipping on his coat and shoes.
We had walked over to Kings Cove Park as the sun began to set. "Where are we going? Are you going to tell me?" I asked again, running to catch up to him for the third time.
"We are going on a horse-drawn carriage ride through the park. I want to just chill a little. I know the guy who runs the carriages, so I messaged him and he said the guy would be waiting for us at the east entrance."
I slowed down and was just about to protest when the east gate came into view, and just as Chase had said, a horse-drawn carriage was already sitting there waiting for us.
"Come on, Soph, pick it up a little," Chase called and approached the driver, introduced himself, and slipped the man some money.
"Where to, sir?"
Chase looked in both directions before answering. "Through the park down to the water?"
"Sounds good, sir."
Before Chase returned to my side, he leaned in and whispered something into the man’s ear. He nodded and turned to smile at me. "Climb in, miss."
Chase stepped up beside me and placed his arm around me, his cologne invading my senses. "Climb in," he whispered, staring into my eyes, taking hold of my hand and helping me up into the carriage.
I had just sat down when he climbed in beside me and reached for one of the blankets that was folded neatly beside me and threw it over our legs just as the carriage pulled away from the sidewalk.
I sat back and breathed deeply, trying to relax as I listened to horses’ hooves clapping along the pavement. I watched the birds flit through the trees. As the gentle breeze blew, I closed my eyes and just sat listening to the sounds around me.
"How did you know I've always wanted to do this?" I whispered more to myself than Chase, even though it was directed at him.
"You've never done this before?"
I shook my head. "Never." I looked over to him, and a soft smile sat on his lips.
"I guess you could say it was a lucky guess then." Chase placed his arm behind me and sat back, encouraging me to do the same, finally pulling me against his body.
I finally felt myself starting to relax as I listened once again to the sounds around me. It was almost therapeutic, and once we turned into the tree-lined lane heading towards the water, the thousands of tiny lights the city always put up at this time of year had come on, lighting our way.
I felt Chase kiss the top of my head. "Are you enjoying this?" he whispered.
I nodded and smiled to myself. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the breeze across my face when I felt the carriage finally came to a halt.
"Sir, I believe this is the stop you requested."
I opened my eyes in time to see the driver turn and nod to Chase.
"Thank you. Oh, and there is no need to wait. We can walk back," Chase said, throwing the blanket off us and climbing out of the carriage. He held his hand out for me to take. I let out a little squeal of surprise when he grabbed me around the waist instead and lifted me down.
Once I was on the ground, he grabbed my hand, and together we walked for a bit, coming to a clearing at the edge of the lake. Chase stopped at the first bench we came to and looked around but then shook his head. "Nope, not this one," he mumbled under his breath as he looked out over the water.
I frowned. "What is it? What are you looking for?" I questioned, but he held his hand up, ignoring me and walking ahead to the next bench, then to the next bench, until finally he stopped and sat down.
"Have a seat," he said, patting the bench beside him and smiling up at me.
I laughed and took a seat, looking out over the calm water. "So what is so special about this exact spot?"
Chase looked at me and put his hand over his heart, acting as if I had fatally wounded him. "Sweets, I'm shocked. You don't remember?"
I shook my head, laughing at his actions. "No, I'm sorry, I don't."
"Come here." He got up off the bench and moved a few steps ahead. When I didn't jump right up, he waved his hand impatiently, signaling for me to join him. "Come on."
I rolled my eyes, let out a breath, and stood, taking a step forward and stopping beside him.
"No, it was more like here," he said more to himself as he grabbed me and positioned me where he wanted me to stand. "What about now?"
"I'm sorry, but I've got nothing." I giggled, shrugging my shoulders.
"Trust me?" he asked as he stepped closer to me yet. I could feel the heat from his body and smell his cologne as he stepped in even closer to me. My heartbeat accelerated, and I let out a breath as Chase stepped up against me, his chest lightly brushing against me.
"Yes," I answered, my voice shaking, swallowing hard.
"Close your eyes," he whispered. I could feel his breath on my cheek as he leaned in and tenderly brushed his lips across mine. My eyes opened instantly, and Chase pulled his head back to watch my reaction. The first thought I had was to pull away, but that thought was soon replaced by curiosity. Instead I leaned in closer toward him, and he bent in again, this time pressing his lips hard into mine. His arms slowly and gently wrapped around my body and pulled me even tighter against him, his tongue brushing against mine.
It didn’t take long before I was lost—lost in his kiss, lost in his arms, lost in the moment between us. I heard nothing around us, and I had forgotten everything. When his tongue brushed through my mouth again, I pressed my body harder into him. His hand rested on my cheek as he sucked my bottom lip into his mouth, finally pulling away, leaving my lips feeling empty.
"Open your eyes. Now do you remember?" he whispered.
I opened my eyes and looked into his and gently smiled. In an instant it all came rushing back to me. The old courthouse now turned into the Whisper Wind Restaurant off in the distance behind him. "I do, I so do. This was the place of our very first kiss."
"Hopefully, this one was a little better than that first kiss so long ago." He chuckled and brushed a strand of hair off my face, studied my gaze, and then leaned in and met my lips again.
"A little," I mumbled and met his lips again.
Chase Malone knew how to kiss—gentle yet firm, with just enough tongue, and like everything else he did, he put his whole self into it. I was now afraid of what it would be like to sleep with him if he put that much effort into kissing. I was scared that he would ruin me completely for anyone else.