Chapter Four

“Mom is going to kill you.”

“Nice to see you, too, Daniel,” I said, shutting the front door.

“Nice to see me? That’s it?”

No, but what I really wanted to say was nothing he’d want to hear. My little brother expected a flood of congratulations. He wanted a hug, and then he’d demand my undivided attention. No doubt he wanted me to ask about the game and offer him a chance to relive the moment that made him a local hero. But I had zero interest in playing that game. That was one song and dance I was definitely sitting out.

“I thought you guys weren’t coming home until this evening,” I said.

“Dad made us hit the road early.”

I glared at my younger brother. Logic would say my frustration with him was sheer envy; he was taller and fitter than I could ever hope to be. He was by far the best looking in the family, even in spite of the fiery red hair he’d inherited from Mom. Add to that his incomparable athletic skills and his limitless success, and it was enough to make any sibling jealous.

But the anger I felt toward him had nothing to do with jealousy . . .

“Roz, honey, is that you?” Mom rushed into the room. Her shoulders sank, and she heaved a sigh. Ringlets of curls fell from her ponytail, and the wrinkles around her lips were darker today—proof enough she’d been worried. “Sweetheart, I’ve been calling you all morning. Where have you been?”

“Out.”

“Out?” She shifted for a closer look at me. She studied my wrinkled clothes, and then her eyes drifted to my muddied shoes. “Out where?”

“Grabbing breakfast.” I bit my lip. “My phone’s dead; I forgot to charge it.”

“Yeah, I’m sure she believes that,” Daniel scoffed.

I fired back. “Shut up.”

“Screw you.”

“Screw you.” I started after him.

“Roz, stop.” Mom shook her head. “What in the world has gotten into you lately?”

Daniel flashed a cocky smile and threw himself back on the couch. Smug jerk.

When Mom finally eased away, content that I wouldn’t kill my brother, Daniel perked up again. “So where were you again?”

I gritted my teeth. “I was at breakfast.”

I couldn’t care less about lying to him, but I hated to lie to Mom. There were no secrets between us. Trying to survive in a household full of boys, she and I only had each other.

It was probably unhealthy how much I shared with her; she knew things even my best friends didn’t know—like, every tiny detail about the three romantic entanglements of my past. There was my first real crush on Scott Park in the second grade, and that time Hunter Reekles kissed me at the end of our sixth grade dance. And then, of course, she was totally up to speed on my two-year, one-sided, and completely fantasized relationship with Avery.

Mom hadn’t encouraged I pursue any of those avenues, and I wasn’t challenging her on that.

I was holding out for something better—a feeling, the kind that makes you weak at the knees with a single glance. The sort of dizzy, happy, blissful feeling that leaves you short for breath. The kind that makes you smile so much your face hurts, and the very feeling that makes you refuse sleep because no dream could ever measure up to the lucid happiness of being awake.

The kind of feeling Mom felt when she first met Dad . . .

I didn’t want to settle for anything less than that, because my parents were proof enough that it was real. It existed. It was out there. And I knew that, if I were patient, I’d feel it someday, too. When the stars aligned, and the time was right, the perfect guy would come along out of the blue, and we’d have that instant connection. And until that day arrived, I’d wait. I wasn’t in any hurry, and in the meantime, I was content to dream.

Dreaming was always a lot more exciting than reality, anyway. Or . . . at least it used to be . . .

I pushed the image of Avery from the forefront of my mind and focused back on Mom.

She was still waiting for an explanation, and the truth wasn’t something I could tell her. I’d always tried to be upfront with my mother, so it killed me to lie about everything I’d lied about lately.

It’d all started on Halloween night, back when Sara Oliver showed her stupid face at Carter’s surprise party. And to cut Avery a little slack, I could admit that she was part of the reason my life had gone to hell. I couldn’t put all the blame on him.

“Where’s Dad?” I asked, hoping to push the focus elsewhere, and it worked.

Mom nodded to the den. “Where do you think?”

“Right.”

It was Sunday, which meant it was game day, so Dad was in Man Cave Quarantine, giving all of his time and attention to his one true love—football. It was too early for the game, but that never stopped him from soaking up every last drop of the pregame shows.

“Did you guys have fun this weekend?”

“Oh, it was wonderful, Rozzy,” Mom said, shaking her head. “I hate that you missed it. Your brother shines out on the field. You would’ve loved it.”

“I bet,” I said, forcing a smile. “I’m glad you had fun.”

“You’ll be at the next one. This is only the beginning of huge things for Danny.”

“Yeah, I’m sure it is.”

“You want to come up and help me unpack? We’ll talk some more?”

“Yeah.” That was an offer I’d never turn down.

Mom was in and out on business trips a lot; she was a consultant for an online marketing firm, and it was her job to travel to all the big cities, attend conferences, and lead large discussion panels for the attendees. Because she traveled so often, we usually spent a great deal of our time talking, gossiping, and laughing as we packed and unpacked her suitcases. We took advantage of what little moments we had. It was our thing, and one I wouldn’t trade for the world.

Once upstairs, Mom tossed her luggage up on the bed, and she flicked a look at me.

“Now that it’s just us,” she said, “anything you want to share?”

“How did you know?”

“I’m your mother. I always know.”

“You won’t be mad?”

“Roz, honey.” She patted the mattress. I climbed up and sat next to her. “Of course I’ll be mad.”

“But you don’t even know—”

“If it’s scandalous enough to lie about, then—”

“It’s not all that scandalous,” I promised, dropping my head back to look at the ceiling. How would I even start to explain? “I wasn’t feeling well last night, so I stopped at Delta’s to get some soup.”

“In other words, you were feeling great, so you met your friends for your weekly hangout at the diner. Come on. Let’s skip the half-truths. Shoot straight with me.”

“I met the girls,” I admitted. “And Jasper.”

“Okay.”

“And when I left, I walked out to come home, and . . .” I sighed. “Someone hit my car.”

Her mouth gaped open.

“It was parked on the street, and the guy just swung too wide to park his SUV,” I said, purposely brushing past the part about “the guy” being Avery.

Mom asked me to shoot straight with her, but any mention of Avery Chase was not the way to sell this story. She’d see it as complete fiction, thinking I’d made up some elaborate lie to cover my butt for a mistake I was responsible for. And admittedly, it was my own damn fault. I’d been guilty of telling a little white lie or two in the past to add flavor to a story, so she had every right to question my sincerity when things got a bit dramatic.

Mentioning Avery wasn’t the way to go. She wouldn’t see my admission as the truth, because who would? And then she’d stop listening, assume the worst, and I would be on the hook for something I didn’t do. So if leaving Avery’s name out of the mix saved me even the tiniest bit of grief, I would keep that small detail to myself for now.

“Mom, it was bad,” I continued. “There was a lot of damage. I couldn’t drive it home, so Wes Barrett brought his tow truck. I was freaking out and completely shocked, and adrenaline just got the best of me, and . . . I passed out. Right on the street.” I pushed my blond hair off my face, revealing the bump. Mom’s eyes widened at the large bruise. “Wes was worried that I’d hurt myself, and he wanted to make sure I was okay. He called Stephen, and Stephen advised him to take me back to the Barrett Farm for the night—just for close observation. He didn’t want me staying home alone.”

“Why didn’t he call us?”

“You were upstate with Daniel. You couldn't have done anything.”

“We could’ve come home,” she said, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Honey, are you okay? How do you feel?”

“Sad. My car’s totaled, Mom.” I looked down to my hands. “Wes says the repairs will cost more than the car’s worth.”

“I’m sure he’s right.” She shrugged a shoulder. “It was one gentle breeze from falling apart. I don’t know what your father was thinking when he brought that thing home.”

“He was thinking, gee, here’s something nice I can do for my daughter on her sixteenth birthday,” I said. “I know you hated it, and everyone else thought it was a piece of crap, but . . . Ally’s dad never bought her a car, and Mel has worked every day for a year to save up money to buy one for herself. Carter and Nora have to share theirs.” I shrugged. “I don’t know, I was just really grateful to have it, and now it’s gone.”

“Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry.”

“He’s going to come over tomorrow night, just so you know.”

“Wesley?” she asked. “That’ll be nice. We haven’t seen him in ages, and we should make him dinner to thank him for taking care of you while we were away.”

“No, not Wes,” I said. “The guy who hit my car. I gave him our address, and I told him he could come for dinner. I thought it would be a good opportunity discuss payment for the damage.”

“What about insurance?” Mom asked, and I shook my head. “He doesn’t have insurance?”

“He’ll talk to Dad. I’m not really sure what the plan is.

“Okay, I’ll let your father know what’s going on, but—”

“But?”

“You and I both know he’ll probably never let you stay home alone again.”

“And you’re nuts if you think I’ll believe that.”

Dad was the least hands-on parent I’d ever met, and he was the last one in this family who’d start dishing out rules and consequences. He and Mom played good cop, bad cop a little too well, and sometimes I’d swear she resented him for it.

Mom was the one with all the rules, the one who always went out of her way to keep everything in check. She’s the one who’d wished for us to stay little forever, because that was the only way she could ensure our safety.

“I’m seventeen, you know.” I smiled. “I’ll be eighteen in one week.”

Mom smiled back, pulling me in for a hug. She pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “You’re a good kid, Rozzy. I have the best kids, you know that?”

“Yeah.” I closed my eyes as she cradled me closer.

No matter how old we grew, she would always see us as her babies, and I’d never shatter that illusion.

As long as she wanted to believe she had the three best kids on the planet, I would let her go on believing that, because I couldn’t let her find out otherwise. I would never be the one to break that woman’s heart.

Stephen was always a handful.

And maybe I had a tendency to stretch the truth from time to time, but if I could say so myself, I wasn’t all that bad.

But Daniel? Her sweet little baby, the all-star athlete, the golden child of the family . . . what he was doing could destroy her world forever, and I would never let that happen. Which is why I had to come up with every penny of that $5,000 he owed.

I had to pay for the mistakes my brother had made, and I needed to do it before my parents caught wind of what was going on. I couldn’t let him break my mother’s heart, which meant I had to agree to Avery’s proposition, because it was the only way to save my family.

I had no other choice.