‘A fully realized human being is one who
knows the masculine and yet keeps to the
feminine.’
— Lao Tzu
Men fight wars defending what is rightfully theirs—their kingdom, land, and, yes, their wives! They are vocal and heroic about defending what is theirs. Both the law and the society are on their side in such matters. These wronged men emerge as heroes as they reclaim what was forcefully snatched from them. Their bravery lies in fighting for a cause and reinforcing faith in people by dispersing the message of the victory of good over evil.
Women, too, have battles to fight, albeit silently. Their battles are not as glorious since their cause is often intangible in nature. Their fight is mostly to challenge the dated notions and ideologies of the society. These ideologies spread a code of conduct that impinges women’s freedom that ultimately forbids them from leading a normal life and making individual choices. Due to these outdated notions of a woman’s role in the society, she is not seen as an individual member of the society beyond her gender, especially at her workplace.
The right to equality is a far-fetched idea for the daughters of the East since some women in these societies are just as patriarchal in their mindsets as the men. Evidences of this mindset can be traced back to the epic Mahabharata.
In the Mahabharata, Queen Satyavati summons Sage Vyasa, her son who was born out of wedlock, to impregnate her widowed daughters-in-law, Ambika and Ambalika. She is indifferent to the plight of these women; all she can think of is a future ruler of the kingdom. Although the widows agree to produce an heir to save the Bharata dynasty, it is a mortifying experience for them. They are so traumatised by the unkempt sage that Ambika screws her eyes shut during the conception and Ambalika turns white with fear.
Women in the patriarchal societies are harsh and judgemental of fellow women and are always ready to tarnish their reputation at the slightest hint of liberation. They exhibit none of the qualities attributed to their gender such as compassion, empathy, gentleness, etc. On the contrary, they are cunning, conniving, manipulative, deceptive, and cold-blooded creatures who exploit their environment in the garb of their gender.
Indian developmental feminist activist and social scientist Kamla Bhasin observed, ‘I know enough women who are totally patriarchal, who are totally anti-women; who do nasty things to other women, and I have known men who have worked for women’s rights their whole life. Feminism is not biological; feminism is an ideology.’34
Ideologies do transcend gender. Our lack of understanding of basic human nature causes us to categorise men and women with certain masculine and feminine qualities. A deep insight into the make-up of human nature would help us understand our various relationships a tad better.
Masculine and feminine qualities may be extreme opposites of each other, but what we fail to recognise is the fact that these two are parts of a single entity. We categorise these opposites according to one’s gender and not as two different aspects of our nature since we feel uncomfortable in associating ourselves with the traits of the opposite gender.
We attribute all the feminine qualities to women and all the masculine qualities to men. These qualities are essentially two types of energies that are part of our individual nature. Our personality is neither feminine nor masculine; it is a beautiful amalgamation of the two. The energy, masculine or feminine, that dominates our nature determines our personality; it makes us who we are.
In the Chinese culture, these two archetypal poles of nature are represented by the characters, yin and yang. Yin symbolises female aspects—intuitive, religious, mystical, compassionate, and yielding. And yang symbolises the male aspects—strong, rational, firm, aggressive, and competitive.
This Eastern ideology seeks to develop the feminine aspect in every human being for a compassionate and benevolent society. In fact, the idea is to achieve a balance between the male and female modes of energies.
Similarly, in Indian mythology, Lord Shiva is shown as Ardhanareshwara, half man-half woman. His androgynous form represents the unification of both the masculine and feminine energies of the universe—Purusha and Prakriti.
A sculpture of Shiva in the Elephanta Caves shows His three faces: His male profile on the right displays virility and willpower; His female profile on the left displays His female aspect which is gentle, charming, and seductive; the magnificent head of Shiva Maheshwara, which is in the centre, radiates tranquillity and transcendental aloofness. This serenity is the result of the sublime union of his two characteristics—the receptive and the creative.
As individuals, we can benefit from these energies only if we stay in the centre without getting caught in the extreme facets of our nature. Our society is currently dominated by the male aspect of human nature as both the men and women have lost touch with their feminine sides.
If the society is regressive, biased, and judgemental, the women are equally responsible for it. Unless we truly cultivate the feminine aspect of our nature, we will not be able to overcome the patriarchal mindset of the society. Patriarchy is not just about fixed gender roles, it is the denial and subjugation of our feminine nature across both the genders.