there’s not many of the good ones left

Danny and I meet the next morning for coffee. Our call-time is late afternoon, so we’ll have time to have a chat, a coffee or two and a few hours of sleep prior to working through the night.

‘I feel a bit hungover this morning,’ I tell Danny, acting surprised.

He mocks me, ‘No-o-o!’

I know I was a little tipsy, but I think I can remember everything that happened. I think?

I sheepishly enquire, ‘Did I do anything or say anything I shouldn’t have?’

He smiles, ‘You were the perfect lady.’

I thank him for putting Alex in her place. In typical Danny style, he says, ‘Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Alex discusses people.’

Sometimes I don’t measure good conversation in terms of time, but in terms of coffees. We spend three lattes, each, joking and laughing. We reminisce about our John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John moment on stage the night before. We even softly sing a few lines of ‘You’re the One That I Want’.

Then, I ask Danny a question that I probably shouldn’t ask him, ‘How did you know your wife was the one that you want?’

He replies frankly, ‘I didn’t’.

I should leave it at that, but I don’t. ‘Have you ever thought about being with someone else?’

He tries to laugh it off, ‘You mean leaving this table and maybe sitting with that couple over there?’

I shake my head and ask a little more seriously, ‘No, I mean being with someone else?’

He becomes a tad more serious as well, and he replies, ‘Like leaving my wife?’

‘No, not necessarily leaving her, but, you know, fooling around?’

He gives an emphatic ‘No’.

I persist, ‘So, you have never thought about it?’

‘Of course, I have thought about it. But one thing you should know about me is that I am a control-freak, and the one person I like to take full control of is my own self. When I was a lawyer, I learnt that actions have consequences. Have you heard of the saying, “If you are not prepared to do the time, then don’t do the crime”? I won’t do anything to jeopardise my family.’

It is very refreshing to talk with someone so genuine and respectful. I’ve been hit on by so many married guys over the years. One time, a passenger, who was travelling with his wife, snuck away from her to give me his phone number. I wanted to march through the cabin and tell his poor wife what a big sleaze-ball her husband was, but instead I slipped a note into her jacket, which had been hanging in the aircraft’s coat-locker. The note read, ‘You deserve better’.

I know of a number of married crew who fool around. Some are random predators while others have long-term affairs, often with a fellow crew member. It is not just men that do this. A married flying friend of mine once confessed to me that she had been having an affair with another married crew member for over two years. They even bid for trips together, but no one knew about them. At the time I thought the chances of her eventually getting caught were quite high. I was right. Her selfish actions, and that of her lover’s, eventually destroyed two marriages.

My conscience could not handle being responsible for breaking up a marriage. I always felt that if a man was prepared to leave his wife for me, he would do exactly the same thing to me if a better offer came up later.

I recently flew with a guy who takes his wedding ring off as soon as he leaves for a trip. He even tried to flirt with me.

‘Aren’t you married?’ I confronted him.

‘Only when I am at home,’ he said.

Jerk.

I know of another man who has been married for years and has children, but as soon as he gets on the aircraft he begins flirting with all the gay guys. I have a pretty good gaydar, and I could tell in an instant that he was gay. His wife must surely know, because every gay guy that met him certainly did.

I know gay couples. I know straight couples. The rules are the same though, no matter which way you swing. It is my opinion that if you are committed to someone you should honour that commitment. Some do, like Danny. Some don’t.

The most bizarre relationship story I have heard was about one of our captains. He was having an affair with a woman in one of our layover ports overseas. As he was senior he’d do the same trip all the time. He would pack his bags for the eight-day trip and go away, and spend time with his overseas girlfriend; he would then return home and do it all over again. This apparently went on for years without the wife ever finding out.

Unbeknown to his wife the captain retired, but rather than tell his wife he continued to pack his bag, put on his uniform and kiss her goodbye to return eight days later. He would drive to the airport, slip out of his uniform and then passenger on a flight to see his girlfriend. When he returned he would put his uniform back on.

All was going to plan until there was a tragedy in the family, and the wife rang the company to pass on a message to her husband. The company replied, ‘But he left the company over six months ago.’

One can only imagine how many times she would have slammed the George Foreman grill into his testicles.

I am sure Danny is not the only married man in the company to stay faithful to his wife, but for now I am really enjoying his forthrightness and honesty. We finish our coffees and decide to walk-off the caffeine before heading back to the hotel for some rest.