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Rose
IT WAS TWO IN THE MORNING by the time I got back to my apartment. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done, leaving Jackson behind at that party with the bottle-blond bimbo still skulking about.
But he smiled so sweetly at me, telling me with his eyes that she was nothing, that he wanted only me, only ever me, and I nodded and let him help me to my car.
I watched him cuddling my sleeping baby to his chest, cupping the back of Adam’s head with his big, long fingers, and my heart knew.
It was over for me. And it had been from the moment I held his hand in the boxing room.
Daniel had only looked at us with a smirk as he stood in the doorway and gave us a little wave. There’d been a twinkle in his eyes, and I’d suffered the realization that my best friend was actually a master strategist and I’d fallen right into his trap. Because he’d set the whole thing up.
The party.
D-Mark.
Even where he’d sat us at the table. All of it had been intended to force us to finally confront the truth. Or to have sex. Knowing Daniel, it hadn’t been anything more than trying to get me to have that much-needed booty call.
I might have been pissed at him except for the fact that my body was blissed out, and I couldn’t honestly remember a time when I’d felt this content.
Not even the reminder of Kyle could steal that moment from me. Losing that bet and the Burberry clutch had been the best thing to happen to me.
Jackson had been careful as he buckled Adam in while I started the car and turned on the heater.
And just before I closed the door, he pulled me into him, hugging me tight, telling me without words that it was just as hard for him to let me go as it was for me to drive away.
His goodbye kiss had been slow, lingering, promising sensual delights to be explored later on, and though I felt some eyes watching us, I didn’t care.
I was lost in him and floating, adrift on a sea of desire and need.
Jackson’s heavy hand trailed down my spine, curving tight around my ass, and I moaned.
“Go home, baby. Go home now before I can’t let you go,” he said on a heated whisper and I nodded.
Throat too tight to speak after that, I hopped into my car and sped off, never even looking back at him in the rearview.
I stayed home Saturday, calling in sick. Daniel had merely chuckled, anticipating it no doubt. And though I half expected Jackson to show up at my door as he had last time, and maybe even hoped he would, he didn’t.
But I knew he understood why I wasn’t going in. I wasn’t running away this time.
I was trying to find my nerve.
And sad to say, I’d not found it Saturday.
It was Sunday morning; Adam was sitting at our small kitchen table and shoveling a spoonful of Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch in his mouth as he watched his cartoons. I watched the anthropomorphic animals without blinking. A dog was kicking a cat into a ten-ton pile of poop, and there was a laugh track going off in the background.
Maybe Kyle was right about cartoons after all. With a grunt, I blew out a heavy breath, picked up the remote, and turned the TV off.
“Mommy!” Adam pouted, a spoonful of milk dribbling down his chin as he gave me a hurt look, reminding me so much of his father in that moment that it made my heart clench. “My cartoon?”
I swallowed hard, nodded, and picked up a napkin to dab at the white liquid plopping from his chin onto the tabletop.
“Yes, I know. But Mom has to talk with you.”
It was now or never.
I’d hated Kyle for doing to Adam what he’d done. For bringing a stranger between us, for breaking up our family before we’d ever even gotten a chance to make it good. But Sheila was a gold digging leech with the heart of Satan.
Jackson wasn’t.
My stomach bottomed out. Happened any time I thought of him. I legit couldn’t believe that after what we’d done, it’d never once crossed my mind to get his number.
How in the hell did I have a boyfriend—and was that what he even was, gah, my heart was a fluttering, silly mess—and we’d not at least swapped the most basic of relationship-defining essentials. And yet there I was, about to tell my most precious treasure about him. About to cross the line into something super real. And super scary.
“Mommy?” he asked in that sweet, cherubic way, tiny voice quivering.
Biting the bullet, I took his hand and squeezed gently. “Honey, do you... Do you remember that guy you met at Uncle Dani’s party Friday night?”
He frowned, giving me a contemplative and serious look. And I wanted to giggle at the sight of him; my child was probably the coolest thing I’d ever made in my life.
“Wait,” he said as he twirled his spoon through his milk, “you mean that guy who kept grabbing you?”
My heart tripped, thinking about just how Jackson had grabbed me. Over and over and over again. But I knew in this case Adam wasn’t thinking of that.
“No.” I cleared my throat. “Not leech face.”
He snickered before plopping one soggy cereal orb onto his tongue and chewing. “Ohhh. You mean the guy who wouldn’t stop looking at you. I liked him,” he chirped, and my fingers fluttered over my lower belly.
I liked hearing that he liked him. Liked that more than I could even express. Because unlike Kyle, I was never going to bring anyone into Adam’s life again without taking his opinion into consideration.
Biting the corner of my lip, I nodded as I picked at a loose sheet of paper towel, ripping a tiny chunk out of the side. “Mm-hhm. Yeah, him. Why do you like him anyway?” I cocked my head, smiling encouragingly at him, hoping that maybe he’d share just what exactly the two of them had been talking about that night. It’d been driving me crazy all weekend.
He shrugged. “’Cause he was nice. And he likes you.”
Heart. Goo. My cheeks were hot, the shell of my ears too. I wanted to flutter my fingers around like a crazy woman, but instead I just continued to rip at the paper towel with nerveless fingers, creating quite the little pile in front of me.
“Did he say that? That he liked me?” My voice came out high-pitched and breathless sounding, which caused Adam to cock his little pixie head and stare at me like his mom had suddenly lost her mind.
“Mommy?”
I flicked my wrist. “You know what, squirt, doesn’t matter.” I couldn’t believe I was grilling my boy for more deets. I had it bad. So, so bad. “That’s not what this chat is about. Here’s the thing, buddy. Mommy... sort of thinks she might”—love him—“like him.”
I stumbled over those words, heart banging so hard it felt like it was trying to rip out my spine. I didn’t love him. But I was definitely falling. Fast. And that was so completely terrifying.
“I know.” He grinned. “I can tell.”
“What?” I chuckled. “Cannot.”
He rolled his eyes and I grabbed him, dragging him to my lap as I began to tickle him breathless. Tears were streaming down his cheeks and mine as we laughed ourselves senseless for several long minutes. I was happy, so damn happy in that moment that I felt I might burst from it.
My stomach hurt from laughing so hard, but I loved it. Loved him. Loved my life, a reality I couldn’t have imagined just seven months ago.
With a happy sigh, Adam wrapped his scrawny little arms around my neck, squeezed tight, and gave me a milk-scented smooch to my cheek. “I love you, Mommy.”
“Me too, monkey butt. All the time. Always.”
He nodded, looking suddenly sad and serious. “I don’t want to go back home.”
And just like that my happiness fled. Because I didn’t want to send him home either. Adam needed his father, but he needed me too. More than just a few days out of the week.
I kissed the top of his head. I wasn’t gonna take him back like this, both of us sobbing and heartbroken. We’d had a great weekend, and I wanted it to end on a high note.
“Hey, you haven’t told me what you want for your birthday yet.”
He beamed. “I don’t know. I just want you there.”
Tears clogged my throat as I wrapped my arms tight around him, breathing his sweet scent of apple-tinted shampoo deep inside me and pretending I could freeze time, keep him with me forever. His fingers dug hard into my back.
An hour later I was dropping him back off, watching Sheila eye me with that slick I-won smirk. It made me hate her in a way I’d never known I could hate before.
When her hands dropped to Adam’s shoulder, pulling him toward her and away from me, a haze of red descended over my vision and I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying something stupid in front of my boy.
“Bye, sweetheart. I’ll see you this Wednesday, okay?” I said, fighting the need to cry like a baby. I needed to be strong for him. If I fell apart, so would he.
He turned, eyes sparkling for just a second before nodding. “Okay, Mommy, and bring Jack too. And Uncle Daniel! He gives the best presents.”
I laughed, not able to help myself. “Mercenary child. I’ll see what I can do.”
Flicking a rapid goodbye, Adam walked through the door.
It never got easier, having to turn and walk away. Leave him there with a woman who didn’t love him the way I did, a bitch trying to usurp her way into my kid’s heart.
I swallowed, eyes starting to burn.
“Jack?” Sheila asked with lifted brow, giving me a hard, curious stare.
But all the fight had gone out of me. I was tired, drained, and needed to be around a friendly face. I wanted to see Jackson. He didn’t work today, and I wasn’t sure whether I should turn to him right now anyway.
I felt so raw. Wounded. I didn’t want to scare him off. Yeah, he’d seen me acting crazy a time or twenty already, but I wanted to try harder. Wanted him to see me as something beautiful and not so broken all the time.
Turning on my heel, I ignored her completely. Used to be a time that seeing her, all blue-eyed and blond-haired with her tight little size-six body, would have filled me with shame, humiliation that I’d let myself go the way I had. Inevitably I always compared myself to her, trying to figure out why. Why Kyle hadn’t loved me enough. What it had been about her apart from the obvious looks that’d made him stray that way?
But suddenly I no longer cared.
Because she meant nothing to me.
~*~
Jackson
THE SUN HAD SET AND I’d just submitted my final paper before it was officially spring break.
An entire week off with no classes.
I knew what I wanted to do. Who I wanted to be with.
Eyeing my phone, I waged an internal debate. I’d promised Rose the weekend, and it’d been hell on me, but I’d kept my word and given her the time she needed with her boy.
But I was tired. Physically drained and yet too wired to sleep.
I wanted her.
Wanted to feel her lush curves again. Wanted to worship her. Just fucking wanted her.
I couldn’t believe I hadn’t gotten her number the other night. I wanted to hear her sultry voice whispering in my ear again. Telling me more, more, more. I chuckled, adjusting myself as my dick started twitching at the heated memory of her moans and groans as I’d plunged my fingers in deep.
I freaking missed that girl.
Heart hammering, I set my jaw and quickly got into the gym website, accessing the member portal, bringing up her file with two quick strokes. My mouth was dry as I eyeballed her number.
This would have been a hell of lot easier if I’d just gotten her number like a normal person. What would she think if I called her out of the blue like this?
Clenching my jaw, I looked at the time. Past ten.
She might be asleep already.
I drummed my fingers on the desk, counting down all the reasons why the idea was bad.
Sleep, for one.
Adam might still be there.
Then there was the whole stalker angle to this.
Yeah, she wouldn’t like that, I was sure. Not to mention how fucking needy I was gonna look if I did it.
Blowing out a harsh breath, I stood as I shut my laptop and walked toward the kitchen. But each step away made me break out in a cold sweat, and before I knew it I was jogging back, powering the damn thing up, and was dialing before my brain could even process what it was I’d just done.
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” I hissed when it rang. That wasn’t me, some needy bastard.
“Hello?”
Her voice washed over my skin like a flame to gasoline. I clutched the wall, shivering at the sexy treble of the voice I’d been dreaming about for the past two nights, my head instantly flooding with images of her panting and crying out, clutching me like she never wanted me to let her go.
“Rose?” Her name sounded broken falling off my lips. It was a question, but I wasn’t sure what.
She sucked in a hard breath, and my pulse raced out of control, terrified by her silence.
“I, um—” I tried to say something. Anything.
“Where are you?”
“Home.” I cleared my throat. “I’m home. I miss—”
“Can you come over?”
Relief slammed through me, followed quickly by the anticipation of knowing that in a few minutes I was going to have my hands all over her.
“Now, Jackson. Come now.”
I didn’t know when I’d hung up, gotten into my car, or even fucking drove there, but before I knew it I was knocking on her door, shifting on the balls of my feet and then...
The door was flung open and there she was, my phoenix, burning bright. She was dressed in black leggings with the sexiest damn sweater clinging to all her delicious curves as it slid down one shoulder, revealing that smooth ivory skin that tortured me with the need to touch.
Her eyes were hot, raking.
“Adam?” I asked with a voice grown hoarse and gravelly as my breathing hitched and blood rushed south to my cock.
She shook her head, those gorgeous lips tipping into a soft frown. “Home.”
And like she’d flipped a switch in me, I charged her, planting my hands on her hips, claiming my stake as I shoved through the door, kicking it shut behind us.
She gasped. Trembled, even, as her hands dug into my forearms, gripping me tight.
I swooped, groaning desperately at the first exquisite taste of her.
Our legs tangled together as we stumbled across her small living room, bumping into a chair, a lamp, before finally tumbling into the couch.
She shoved me down, straddling my thighs, her sweet pussy hovering just over my rigid, painful erection, kissing the corner of my jaw, my neck, sucking on my Adam’s apple. I hadn’t known Rose could be like that. Uninhibited and wild. But I fucking loved it.
“Condom?” she panted before shoving her hands underneath my shirt and scoring her nails down my abs, making me hiss and flex.
I choked, sucking in a harsh breath as fire erupted over my body, making my head throb. Her scent of lemons and flowers infected my brain, making me stupid.
Mindless.
“Back pocket,” I grunted when her hand slipped over me, fisting me so damn perfectly that I shoved up and off the couch, taking her with me. “Baby. Fuck!” I grunted again when she stroked me harder, mixing pain with pleasure.
I never wanted her to stop. But I had to be inside her. Now.
“Get it, Jackson. Get it now. I can’t wait. Need you.” She whimpered between drugging, almost violent kisses. “Been desperate all weekend.”
She couldn’t have said anything else that would have spurred me on to move as fast as I was. My hand flew to my back pocket, desperate to get at the rubber already. But her sweet little mewls and the way she kept petting and clutching at me made it almost impossible for me to be smooth about this.
She pulled my bottom lip between her teeth, biting down so hard my body shook, but then she’d lick and suck and nip and murmur sweet nothings, making me burn all over again.
“Fuck,” I growled in frustration, still unable to get my damn wallet out.
I wrapped my arm around her waist, bringing her with me as I shoved up just enough to get at my wallet. I tugged it out with swift jerks, not giving a fuck if I ripped a hole in my jeans.
And even as I rifled through it, she was undoing my jeans, pulling down my zipper. It sounded like gunshot in my ears as our pants and groans filled the space between us like lusty music, making me so painfully hard I was ready to blow. All she had to do was brush me a few more times and I was gonna lose whatever tenuous control I had left.
“Baby, baby, not yet. Slow down, you’ll make me come too soon,” I mumbled. But she growled back at me as I tried to brush her hands off and I couldn’t help it, I chuckled because damn the girl was making me hot.
Her mouth was on the corner of my own, licking and murmuring, “That’s sort of the point, lover.”
I grunted, loving the way that word sounded dropping of her kittenish tongue. Possessive and claiming.
“Yeah. Fuck it,” I agreed with a hard nod before taking that sweet mouth and making it mine.
Her hand wiggled down my boxer briefs as she purred into my throat, and it was a good thing I was already sitting because the second her cold little hand touched my throbbing dick and stroked, I grew weak.
I yanked that stupid damn condom out, hating how uncoordinated and clumsy I suddenly felt. As if she knew, she slipped it from my hand, and leaning back took the gold foil between her teeth and ripped, eyeing me hard as she did it. Her movements were torturously slow and pre-cum started leaking.
I wasn’t gonna last. And I needed to. I needed to bring her pleasure too. Wanted to hear her cries. Her moans.
“Rose, I—”
She shook her head. And then stole my lips, my words, my breath, and my heart. She slipped her slick, wine-tinted tongue through my lips, pulling a fierce moan from me as we tasted each other. Drank of each other.
Her breath become mine and mine hers.
“Slide ’em down, Jackson. Help me.” She tugged at my pants.
My jerky movements were ugly, frenzied. But somehow I shoved my pants and boxers down just enough to free myself.
My cock sprang up long and thick, the head bright red and taut with tension. Those gorgeous fuck-me lips of hers parted as she looked at me, and I wanted her to look at me like that forever. Like she’d just seen her favorite toy and wanted to play.
The girl made of mess of me.
My cock leaked harder, and her lashes fluttered.
“Fuck,” I grunted, snatching the condom out of her suddenly lax fingers and sliding the rubber on, hating the feel of latex but desperate to feel her heat, her wetness hug me. Take me.
And then Rose was off me and I cried out, reaching for her, ready to do whatever to bring her back, but she was frenzied, moving with swift urgency.
Her hands dipped beneath the band of her leggings and then... Holy shit, she shoved those things down those long, sexy, fucking curvy legs of hers and kicked them aside.
And I got my first look at heaven.
Neatly trimmed and utter perfection.
I wanted to study her, wanted to spread her legs and sink my face into her gorgeous pussy, inhale her, lick her, suck her clit into my mouth and drink until I passed out from the fever.
But she was back on me, straddling my hips, and before I knew it she’d slid down my length, gloving me all the way to the hilt.
Clenching my teeth, I sucked in air like a bellows. So damn good.
And I couldn’t think anymore. All I could do was rock, pound violently into her, slip in and out of her tight, wet channel. My hands slid beneath her shirt, pressing against her naked back, skin so hot and soft.
“Yes, yes, yes,” she moaned, riding me with wild abandon, taking it all.
My balls drew tight. I wasn’t gonna last. I wasn’t...
“Fucking hell,” I bellowed as my dick spasmed and her sweet, sweet pussy sucked beads of white-hot spurting semen out of me, pulling me deeper into her.
“Come with me,” I growled even as I shook violently, feeling like I was dying and flying all at once.
She rubbed in a furious circle over me, face determined, biting her bottom lip and grunting hard.
So damn beautiful. “Come on, baby,” I whispered heatedly. “Come on.”
“Close. I’m clo—”
Reaching between us even as pleasure so profound threatened to make me pass out, I found the swollen hood of her clit and pinched.
“Jackson.” She shivered before biting down on the side of my neck, making me hiss harder, doubling the sensation of pleasure pounding through me so that my eyes rolled back.
A full-body spasm took her violently, swiftly, pumping me even harder as her pussy fluttered, wringing every last drop of that convulsive orgasm out of me. My vision grew dark, black, and all I could do was clutch her to me, gasping for breath as I tried to make sense of what we’d just done.
It took several seconds before I could even open my eyes again.
Shock was the overriding emotion filling me. Not in a million years could I have imagined my shy girl could turn into this sultry, sexy lioness.
I’d never had sex like that before.
So desperate and violent.
I’d had sex. Good sex. Even great sex. But I’d always kept my faculties, was in control of every move I’d made. Of her pleasure and mine. Not tonight. Tonight I’d almost embarrassed myself.
I’d completely lost my head. Lost any ability to reason. I was still in her tight, wet warmth. But my dick was going soft; I wanted to stay inside her forever. Right here. Never leave.
I rocked gently, hanging on as long as I could before finally being forced to slide out.
“Oh my god,” she whispered before groaning and burying her face in my neck. “I’m... I don’t know what—”
Rose started to move, trying to get off me, but I held on tight, digging my fingers into her thick, sexy ass, keeping her firmly where she belonged.
God, I loved that ass. A man could get addicted to curves like hers.
“Where do you think you’re going?” I grumped, eyeing her, knowing immediately what she was doing.
Her thighs had gone stiff, her spine straight. She was ready to get off me, but I wasn’t ready for her to leave.
“I like you just where you are, my Rose.”
A grin tipped the corners of her mouth as her lashes fluttered, and I drank in the sight of my woman looking thoroughly ravished. Her gorgeous hair clung to her forehead, and her deep, heavy breaths caused her chest to rise and fall, mesmerizing me with the sway of her perfectly shaped breasts.
Even her eyes sparkled. Sex looked good on her.
“How?” she asked. “How is this not hurting you?”
And I hated him. Hated him for ever making her think she wasn’t good enough. For making her see herself that way. I knew she’d lost quite a bit of weight before coming to me, but even so, it shouldn’t have mattered. Because it was her soul stealing my heart and not just the body that came with it.
“Your husband was a dick.” My words came out sharp, sounding gruff and harsh even to my ears and she flinched, eyes dropping down, and my heart bled.
I’d just had the best damn sex of my life with a woman I was insane for. I didn’t want her regretting what we’d done. I didn’t.
Cupping her chin tenderly between my fingers, I rubbed my thumb in lazy circles over her petal-soft skin. “Look at me, cupcake.”
And her eyes when they turned toward me stole my breath. There was such raw pain glittering in their depths that I decided for her I would always be brave. Be bold. And honest.
No matter what it took, I was going to protect this woman. Forever.
“You’re with me now, Rose. And I’m possessive of what’s mine. I’m never going to like him, but I’m grateful he didn’t know what he had.”
Tears shimmered in her eyes, and then I kissed her. Wrapping my arms around her, I stood, making her squeal and laugh, and I wanted to always hear that sound come out of her. The sound of her joy. It speared me like a blade. This woman had me in the palm of her tiny hand, and I doubted she even knew it.
She was dangerous. Rose called me strong, but I knew that if she really wanted to, she could shatter me.
I’d never given my heart to any woman before, never wanting to give anyone that kind of hold over me. But I was willing to take the plunge for her.
“I love how strong you are,” she breathed before planting a row of kisses down my cheek.
She smiled at me, looking innocent, happy, and I trembled because she had no fucking idea of the truths rocking through me, making me feel hot and cold and terrified to ever lose her. Rose was becoming vital in a way nothing ever had to me before.
“Wanna go to bed, caveman?”
I couldn’t fight my grin and chuckled. “Caveman? Is that what you think of me? Should I start grunting, knuckle-dragging? Does that make you hot, cupcake?”
Her eyes danced as she tossed her head back and laughed, causing her gorgeous tits to rock against me and make my heart beat like thunder in my chest. It was terrifying, losing control this way, and yet I didn’t want to stop. Ever.
She kissed my cheek, and a tremor shot down my spine, and my knees went weak, forcing me to lean against the wall a second just for the support.
Did she know? Couldn’t she see what was happening to me?
Her fingers threaded through the tips of my tied-back hair, and her look was innocent, almost shy. My girl had no idea the kind of power she had over me.
“You said I needed to give you a new pet name? I thought about hero material, but—”
“I love it,” I breathed.
Not an I love you, but the word hung in the air. Heavy. Thick. And my heart beat like a wild thing in my chest. My ears rang, terror stripping my mouth of all moisture. I’d never wanted this, what was happening to us. Emotions were messy, love the worst one of all. I’d seen the aftereffects of it firsthand, the way it could destroy someone who’d once been so full of life but was now just a shell that breathed.
As if she understood, as if she knew, she leaned in and she kissed me. The touch was soft, gentle, flowing like healing waters through me. I might not have been looking for this, but I wouldn’t... couldn’t walk away either.
Planting her forehead against mine, she smiled, lips moving like a feather against my own, and my body started to shiver. I’d just had the most amazing sex of my life, but I could feel myself growing hard again, could feel the desire inching like flame through my veins. I was never gonna get enough of this.
Her.
“Wrap those gorgeous thighs around my waist, baby. And hang on tight,” I grunted.
Rose did exactly as I asked. I couldn’t walk with my pants literally hanging around my ankles, so I stepped out of them, kicked them behind us, and moved down the hall.
I had plans for my Rose. The night had only just begun.