So you've figured out to kiss off the “everything everything everything” that kept you from being your true self. Now you're kissing the sky and the ground and the entire beautiful world because you've found your mojo again, you've learned to be happy. Still, don't be shocked if the old you, Ms. I'm All Alone and Hating It rears her miserable head. Like on a glorious fall day, when you're driving through the park with the radio on and the sun roof open—and suddenly a gargantuan SUV bears down on your tail and you feel that familiar surge of righteous rage. How dare this soccer mom with her car full of snot-nosed yuppie kids try to run you off the road? You have a right to be here too, even if it is just you and your Saturn on the way to get your hair highlighted. Why do you have to get out of her way, Ms. I've Got Everything You. Ever Wanted and Then Some? But you do, and as she speeds past, you flip her off, feel like a jerk, and find yourself back in a funk.
If it comes to that, then pick up this book. Find a poem to match that moment of fury and frustration, like Ethridge Knight's “Feeling Fucked Up.” Go ahead and think, “Fuck music and clouds drifting in the sky…fuck/the whole mothafucking thing.” And then remember to take a look at Stephen Crane's poem “The Heart.” If you keep flipping off poor harried moms and their kids, it really will just be you and your highlights alone in your Saturn eating your bitter heart out. You know that's not who you want to be. You want to be the fulfilled grandmother with her “nicely mapped face,” laughing in her garden in Grace Paley's poem “Here.”
Obviously, just because you've found yourself and a sense of happiness again doesn't mean that you won't still experience moments and days of Hurting. No one can find an absolutely perfect way to live in this world—heartache and loss can always sneak up on us. And the stages that we describe in Kiss Off aren't absolutely perfect either. If you read all of these poems straight through, you won't necessarily be healed for life. Just because you've made it to Believing doesn't mean you won't find yourself Reeling again someday.
But this time around you'll have the Kiss Off poems to keep you company, offer empathy, and cheer you on. Let “Sadie's Poem” get you fired up; laugh your way to a fresh perspective with “The Pope's Penis” remember the glorious brilliance of grand responses to everyday events described in “We Take Our Children to Ireland.”
We hope you take these poems to heart and use them as a source of strength and inspiration. They'll help you recognize what you're feeling and remind you of who you want to be—a true believer in herself, in life, and in love.