Dave pulled on his suit coat and straightened his tie. He looked over at Mel, who still couldn’t look him in the eye.
Bec walked into the bedroom, her arm heavily bandaged. ‘Daddy?’
Dave bent down to hug her. ‘Yes, princess?’
‘Where’s Gran gone again?’ She looked up at him with large eyes as Mel let out a sob. Dave watched as his wife turned away and left the room.
‘Well, honey, Gran has gone to be a star in heaven,’ he said. ‘To look out for you and Mummy and Alice. You won’t be able to see her anymore, but she’ll always be watching over you, and every time you look at the night sky, you’ll be able to see her twinkle.’ A lump in his throat made it difficult to talk. ‘Come on, we have to get going.’ He took her hand as they walked out together.
Mel was standing in the kitchen, Alice in her arms.
‘Ready?’ he asked.
She nodded and walked out in front of him.
In the car, Dave strapped the two girls in and got into the driver’s seat. He reached for Mel’s hand. ‘Okay?’ he asked softly.
‘How dare you ask me that?’ she said in a low voice. ‘How dare you.’
This is how it had been since Ellen had been killed. Anger. Silence. Grief.
All of this had helped Dave make his decision. There had been so much to think about, so much to work through. It was nigh on impossible to come back from what had happened.
Mel stared straight out the front window, her head high. ‘Once today is over, I don’t want you to come home with us. I’ll get Dad to get in touch about the legal side of things.’
‘Mel, let’s not do this today,’ Dave said. Her words weren’t unexpected. He’d been going to tell her after the funeral he was leaving. He knew that would be what Mel would want.
‘No, I have to …’ This time, she looked over at him. Her eyes were red and she looked like she hadn’t slept in a week.
‘Mel, I’m sorry.’
She held her hand up. ‘Dave, I have nothing to say to you. My mother, your children’s grandmother, is dead because of you. Bec was shot because of you. How could you even think this would work now?’
Tears welled in Dave’s eyes. ‘Mel, please, just let me—’
‘No, Dave. We’re done. No more.’
Letting the tears fall on his cheeks, Dave put the car into gear and they drove towards the church. He didn’t have an answer, because she was right.
He thought about a future without his children living with him. Had chasing Bulldust been worth what he was about to lose? His heart felt as if it was being squeezed from his chest.
Glancing in the rear-view mirror, Dave saw his own blue eyes looking at him from Bec, and he dragged the back of his hand across his face, taking a few deep breaths.
Reflecting on what Kathy had said to him after Spencer had died, he knew he’d made the right decision.
‘Neither of you deserve to be unhappy, and those kids deserve to know what it’s like to be loved by two happy and content people, rather than parents who walk on eggshells around each other. Give them good examples of love, not just making do. You wouldn’t want them to end up in a relationship like yours, I’m sure. So show them a good one.’
Life would okay, he decided. Hard, horrible, but okay. He would make it work.