“What was in the envelope?”
“Money.”
Trevor breathed a silent sigh of relief as Chynna began talking again.
She flicked a glance at him. “I mean thousands and thousands. Tristan did a lot of cash business and he kept it all at the house, although I was never sure where exactly. There wasn’t a safe. I figured it was under floorboards or something. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know, actually.”
“Why would he do that?”
“He didn’t trust banks. He called it institutionalized theft.” She shrugged. “The note said that I should open my own shop, that it was time for me to take the next step. I didn’t know whether that was an endorsement of my skills or a kick in the ass, but I was still so angry that I saw it as a rejection. If I couldn’t have an opinion different from his, then I didn’t want to stay. I took the money and my few things and I went down to Chinatown to rent a shop. I opened Imagination Ink, and eventually, I bought the building. I built a clientele and I found success, because of what Tristan had taught me. I brought in kids I found in the streets, because I knew I owed my life to Tristan’s decision to do that. They didn’t all stay, but some of them did, and some of them learned to be tattoo artists. I made two of them partners in Imagination Ink after Tristan died and ultimately sold it to one of them. Rox, who did my roses.”
“Did Tristan know?”
“I never told him about it.”
“Did he come there?”
“Not openly. He never crossed the threshold, as far as I knew. I used to think I saw him sometimes, late at night or early in the morning, standing across the street and looking, but I didn’t speak to him until he was diagnosed.”
“He called you then?”
She shook her head. “The kid he’d taken in called me. His name was Neo, or at least that’s what he said it was. He’d heard about me: when Tristan got sick but wouldn’t seek help, he called me, hoping I could change Tristan’s mind.”
“He disliked authority.”
“He distrusted it. It was a learned response.” Chynna stiffened. “So, I went up there, because I knew he wouldn’t talk to me on the phone, and I could see right away how sick he was. He’d lost a lot of weight. He called me Persephone, the way he used to when he was talking about me being his muse. He tried to make a joke of the timeliness of my return and spit up blood when he tried to laugh. I didn’t think it was funny.”
“I don’t get it.”
“Persephone is a goddess, daughter of Demeter and the stolen bride of Hades. She governs true love, but she lives in the underworld with Hades so she facilitates communication with the dead. She can banish ghosts, I think by reasoning with them, and she’s said to help with a painless death.”
“Not funny,” Trevor agreed.
Chynna shook her head. “I convinced him to go to a doctor, but the prognosis was as bad as we both expected. He had esophageal cancer and it was pretty advanced, probably because he’d been ignoring the signs.” She looked down at her hands. “He declined treatment.”
“Oh, Chynna.”
She shook her head and her tears fell. “I took him back to his apartment over Mythos because it was what he wanted, and I took care of him because he’d taken care of me. We both knew it wouldn’t be long. When he was asleep, I called his friends, asking them to come and see him one last time. He had a lot of company in those few weeks. The place could have had a revolving door. And we didn’t talk much ourselves. There was always someone else to distract him from me.” She sighed. “But he suffered so badly. It was terrible. He called it penance for his sins, but no one deserves what he endured. After one awful night, he asked me to come to bed with him. We spooned together the way we used to, but I was behind him, and I could feel that he was just bones. It made me cry. I held him and I knew I should apologize for that fight but before I could think of how to say it or how to begin, he slipped away. He kissed my hand and whispered ‘thank you’ and then he was gone. Just gone. I knew the instant that he died.” Her tears fell then and Trevor held her close. “I never made it right,” she confessed. “I had the chance and I didn’t take it and I’ll regret that for the rest of my life.”
She cried a bit then but less than Trevor expected. He didn’t know what to say. He knew plenty about having regrets but not about making them go away.
She straightened eventually and wiped away her tears, forcing a smile for him. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.”
“He’s been gone ten years,” she whispered. “Sometimes it seems like a lifetime ago and sometimes it seems like yesterday.”
Trevor just nodded.
Chynna took a deep breath. “I ended up with the job of cleaning out his things. He’d told me where there was an envelope but I hadn’t opened it when he was alive. It had his will in it, and it had been done by a lawyer, all the t’s crossed and the i’s dotted. He’d left everything to his daughter, who lived in California near his ex-wife. She came and she was about my age, but so angry and disdainful of her father and his abilities. I suggested an auction of Tristan’s things to raise money for cancer research or a resource for homeless kids, but she refused. She said she was going to chuck everything and sell the shop. Some developer wanted to buy it and tear it down, as part of a plan to fill the block with condominiums. Neo knew where the cash was hidden, although we’d spent a lot of it on living expenses and there’d been no revenue while Tristan was sick. I gave him some of it before surrendering the rest to her and I don’t regret that. I gave away his drawings and few possessions to his friends, who I knew would cherish any keepsake.”
“And you?”
“I took only the envelope with my name on it which had been in the bigger envelope along with the will.” She shook her head. “My name isn’t Chynna. Not really. That’s the name I took when I ran away. The name I was given when I was born was Elizabeth. Tristan was the last person who knew that, and he addressed the envelope to Elizabeth, not Chynna.”
“What was in it?”
“The drawing for that back piece.” She smiled. “And a note from him about what it meant. I’d totally misunderstood him. He wasn’t defining me. He understood me. It was about where I’d been and where he thought I was going, a kind of a talisman for a safe journey. I realized that he’d known he would die before me and had always intended for me to move on, that he didn’t believe he was my future. He just thought he was someone to help me on my way. I was angry with him for not seeing more potential in us, but also I was angry with myself for not asking what the drawing meant when he’d first given it to me.”
“What happened to it?”
“I have the sketch and the letter. I’ve thought about getting it done, but he should have been the one to give it to me. It would have had his chi in it then.” She sighed and forced a smile. “But it’s too late now. There. Now you know my story.” She would have risen from the bed, but Trevor caught her hand in his.
“Why don’t you want your grief to heal?”
“Because I don’t deserve it. I didn’t listen to him. I didn’t trust him.”
“He trusted you. You took care of him and he let you. You were there for him at the end.”
She lifted her gaze to Trevor’s. “Was it me or was it his muse?”
“Weren’t you one and the same to him?”
“I guess.” She shrugged. “Taking care of him seemed like the least I could do. We were married, after all.”
“Maybe it was just the first thing you could do.”
“What do you mean?”
“Is it time for a memorial tattoo?”
She considered the idea, her lips pursed. “It just might be. I have to think about it a little more.”
“Where does the bird come in?”
Chynna laughed and he was relieved by the sight. “I have a friend who works at an animal rescue. They get a lot of exotic pets. People change their minds once the novelty wears off. There was this raven, who’d been raised from a chick and hand-fed. He didn’t know how to hunt or interact with other birds, let alone survive in the wild, even though he was an adult. He became too big and too mischievous for the person who had raised him, so he was surrendered. My friend thinks everyone needs a pet and she thought I needed an unusual one. Tristan had died and I’d sold the shop to Rox and I was at loose ends a bit. I went to see the raven, although I was very skeptical, and I just lost my heart. He has this gleam in his eyes and you just know he’s going to make trouble. He wanted Tristan’s ring from my hand, which is how he got that name.”
“Did you give it to him?”
“It’s in his hoard. He has a little collection of shiny things and likes to rearrange them, or maybe show them off. He asks me questions and loves watching old movies.”
“Questions?”
“We’ve gotten to understand each other. Either he speaks English or I speak raven.” She smiled. “He chooses tarot cards and he’s pretty good at it. I feel like he’s in touch with the hidden side of the world, just like Tristan was.” She looked up. “Plus he reminds me how wonderful the world is, each and every day.”
“It sounds like Tristan is a good name for him.”
She wrinkled her nose. “I kind of miss him, actually. Crazy bird.”
“How long do ravens live?”
“My friend said ten or fifteen years in the wild, but they can live up to forty years in captivity.” Chynna smiled. “I’m probably stuck with him for the duration, but that’s fine by me. He’s good company.”
Trevor nodded and leaned back in the bed. Chynna stretched out beside him in her fluffy robe and they held hands.
“Thank you,” he said. “That’s a heck of a story.”
“Thank you,” she replied and squeezed his hand. “I actually feel better for sharing it.”
Trevor was exhausted but there was one more thing he needed to ask her. He rolled to his side and looked down at her. Her gaze fell, predictably, to his tattoo. “So, what’s the difference?” he asked quietly and her gaze flew to his. “What’s the difference between me being rootless and you being rooted? We’ve both let the past shape our present. We both want a different future, but we haven’t done anything to change that.”
Her smile was slow and lit her entire face. “There is no difference. It’s something else we have in common. But we’re both making changes now.” She rolled him to his back and laid on top of him. She framed his face in her hands and looked down at him. “Here’s to the transformative road trip,” she whispered, then kissed him before he could reply.
And that was just fine by Trevor.
It was amazing how just sharing a story could make Chynna feel so much better. She felt lighter on her feet and her heart seemed to be filled with promise. Trevor was gone and there was a note beside the alarm clock.
Pool’s open
Below that, he’d noted the time of his departure. He’d been gone an hour so Chynna suspected he was finished with his swim. She wasn’t in a hurry to swim naked and alone, since there were more guests in the hotel, plus she was hungry. Chynna washed and left her room, not really surprised to find him in a suit at the front desk.
He definitely cleaned up well.
He winked at her before helping some departing guests to carry their luggage out to their car, which was idling right outside the door. There was Christmas music playing and for the first time in a long time, Chynna listened to it. She was tempted to sing along. Trevor strode back inside, gave an elaborate shiver and then came straight to her.
“Okay?” he asked and she smiled.
“Better than okay. I’m ready to take on the world.”
“Excellent. Merry Christmas, by the way.” He stole a kiss that became long and leisurely. His hand was on the back of her waist, lifting her toward him, and he kissed her as if they had all the time in the world.
Chynna stepped back reluctantly, then ran a hand down his chest. “Merry Christmas to you, too,” she said and his smile flashed.
“It’s definitely one to remember.”
“Why did you talk to me when I first arrived?” she asked on impulse.
“Is that one of your questions?”
“It could be.”
“That’s easy. Because you look like you have it all together. Like you know what you want. I find that very very sexy.”
His answer surprised Chynna but she liked it. “I thought you were going to say that you noticed me because you’d decided it was time to find someone.”
“Maybe that was part of it. Either way, I have no complaints.” He smiled down at her. “You?”
“Not one.”
A frown touched Trevor’s brow and Chynna sensed there was something he hadn’t told her.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” He smiled again. “I want to talk to you about something but we’ll do it when there’s more time.” He nodded toward another couple who were headed for the front desk with their luggage.
Chynna tried to ignore her sense of foreboding. “When you’re unemployed?” she asked lightly instead.
“Good plan.” He grinned. “Spencer’s cooking this morning, so you don’t have to work for your breakfast.”
Chynna laughed. “I didn’t mind.” She indicated that he should go and watched him greet the guests. He asked after their stay as he checked them out and she admired his easy charm again. Then she went in for breakfast, making a plan for her contribution to the wedding feast.
Maybe roasted vegetables. They’d need side vegetables for the turkey and someone was probably already doing potatoes. Reyna would make something wonderful for dessert. She resolved to check with Spencer and followed the smell of coffee to the kitchen, humming along to Hark the Herald Angels Sing.
Gabe thought the feast at Jane’s was the perfect culmination of their Christmas wedding. He was glad that Spencer and Liv were together, and was certain of the future of the lodge. The simple reality was that with both partners married, there was less possibility of radical change in their situations. He felt badly about Trevor, but his old friend and former partner was easygoing about it. He knew Trevor would land on his feet.
To Gabe’s pleasure, Daphne and Ned had decided to stay on. He and Lexi had planned to spend a few days in New York with them before they headed home. Ned’s kids had never seen snow and earlier in the morning, Kade had introduced them to snowball fights. They’d started to build snow forts while everyone else was cooking and it had been hard to drag them inside to change in time to get to Jane’s.
Gabe drove his SUV with Lexi, Daphne, Ned and the kids, along with a supply of wine in the back. He’d brought wines for every course from the wine cellar at the lodge, knowing that it couldn’t be any other way at Spencer’s wedding celebration. Spencer had gone with Liv to pick up his mom and Katerina, who had retreated to the family home once the power had come back on there. Reyna and Kade had driven into town to collect Clem, the bookseller and Penny, who owned the thrift store, at Chynna’s suggestion. They both tended to spend the holiday alone and Gabe was glad that Chynna had thought about including them. Trevor had offered to pick up Liv’s mom in town and Chynna was with him.
Eighteen people meant a serious feast.
The smell of roast turkey had greeted them on arrival at the oldest house in town, and Jane had clearly been excited to have so many guests. She’d also been a bit flustered, and Spencer had taken charge of the kitchen with her permission.
“It’ll be a bit crowded at the table,” Jane said, but Gabe and Trevor exchanged a glance. “That’s why I didn’t set it yet.”
“We’ll take care of it,” Trevor said with authority. “Your dishes are all in the sideboard.”
“And some in the pantry.” She showed him around and Trevor took charge. “I want to use all the good china, silver and crystal,” she said firmly. “It’s Christmas. I don’t care if I’m washing up into the new year.”
“You won’t have to,” Chynna said. “We’ll help.”
Gabe poured Jane a glass of sherry and invited her to sit and enjoy her guests. Her relief was evident. Daphne asked Jane about the age of the house while Reyna took people’s coats into the parlor and encouraged them to leave their boots in the hall. There was holiday music playing somewhere but the sound of happy conversation quickly overwhelmed it. The house was decked with greenery and plaid bows, and looked wonderful. Fires crackled on the hearths in both living room and parlor.
Everyone was taking a jar of honey home from Honey Hill. There was a line of jars on the table in the foyer of the house, each dressed with a Christmas bow.
The kitchen was filled with helping hands and Jane’s golden retriever happily wove her way through the crowd, tail wagging like a banner. The bride didn’t wear white, but she had on a pretty peasant dress with embroidered bees down the bodice. Gabe had never seen Liv in a dress and guessed that Lexi had loaned it to her.
Gabe made sure everyone had a drink, then went to check on the preparations. He found Trevor and Chynna in the large dining room, arranging chairs around. It was a massive carved table which looked to be cherry and also antique. Maybe the room had been built around it. There was already a beautiful white damask tablecloth on it.
“It’s a huge table,” Trevor said as Gabe came into the dining room.
“Thank goodness,” Chynna said. “We can all eat together.”
“Nicer than a buffet,” Trevor agreed.
The room had striped wallpaper and large windows on two walls. There was a silver tea service on the sideboard, wound with Christmas greens, a chandelier hanging over the table and sconces on the walls. There were a number of candlesticks on the sideboard too, all filled with beeswax candles.
Trevor eased a kitchen chair in at the side, between the chairs that matched the table. It was slightly narrower. “Two at each end, seven down each side? It should be five down each side and one at each end, but we can squeeze a little.”
“It’ll be worth it,” Chynna said. “How about Spencer and Liv at the head of the table,” she suggested and Gabe nodded.
“The moms at the foot of the table,” he said. “Katerina beside Spencer’s mom.”
Trevor nodded. “We can’t do bride’s side and groom’s side, really, but we can alternate men and women. Almost.”
Jane had set out little silver holders to designate places on the sideboard, along with some blank tags. Chynna had already written the name of each guest on one of the cards in a beautiful script and was fitting the cards into the holders.
“That looks like old advertisements,” Gabe said, noting her skill.
“Or tattoos,” she said with a smile.
Trevor began to place them as they’d discussed. Lexi was beside Spencer, then Gabe, then Daphne, the two kids and Ned. That filled one side with Katerina. Kade was seated beside Liv, then Reyna, Clem the bookseller, Chynna, Trevor, Penny and Jane.
“Close,” Chynna said when he was done. “Just one woman too many.”
“Don’t say that,” Trevor teased. “I thought she and Liv’s mom might know each other.”
Gabe nodded. “Of course. And it’ll be easier for the kids to be with Ned and Daphne.”
Once they agreed on the seating, Trevor opened the sideboard. The array of china was impressive. It was all bone china with a gold border. They decided upon chargers, with dinner plates and soup bowls, bread and butter plates to one side and plates for dessert on the sideboard. Gabe found red and white wine glasses, water glasses, and put the liqueur glasses and brandy snifters on the sideboard. Chynna opened the silver drawers and caught her breath.
“It’s all polished,” she said with awe.
“Jane said she wants to use it.”
“We have to help her with the washing up,” Chynna said then chose salad forks and soup spoons, knives and forks for the main course, dessert forks and spoons and coffee spoons. Meanwhile, Gabe checked with Spencer about serving plates and silver, and they got all that sorted out. Things were getting busy in the kitchen and the volume of noise was rising along with the delicious smells.
Chynna was putting the candles on the table when Gabe checked on the dining room, along with a centerpiece of greenery. “It looks like a magazine shoot,” Reyna said with approval from the doorway and took a picture of it. Daphne peeked around her shoulder and did the same, then Spencer called that it was time to eat.
They sat down almost at the stroke of noon, winter sunlight streaming through the windows and the table almost groaning at the weight of their glorious meal. Jane said Grace and Gabe took Lexi’s hand, knowing he would never forget.
Then he lifted his glass and toasted the happy couple.
Honey Hill.
Reyna smiled as Kade drove into town after their Christmas celebration at Jane’s. The town really was picture-perfect, and even more perfect since she’d met Kade there. She felt full and warm and happy, and was barely listening to Penny’s excited summary of events from the back seat. Clem grunted at intervals from beside her, and that seemed to be enough to keep her talking.
The snow had stopped and even though it was only four, it was getting dark already. They’d stayed at Chynna’s insistence to wash up all of the dishes, and had left Jane with the clean ones on the dining room table, ready to be put away. The kitchen had been sparkling when they left, and Jane had packed leftovers for some of the guests. Everyone had taken home Reyna’s Christmas cupcakes.
They drove past the church on the corner with the nativity scene set up in front, one light burning above the manger like that long-ago beckoning star. The figures, Reyna knew, had been carved by the owner of the general store decades before and were lovingly set up each year. She waved to Mary and Joseph as she always did and saw Kade smile.
She saw as they turned onto the main street that the fairy lights in the holiday decorations were already lit. Each shop had cedar roping draped over the front window, many with fairy lights wound into the branches, and big plaid bows blowing in the wind. With the freshly-fallen snow, the town looked like it should star in a holiday movie.
Honey Hill for the Holidays.
Coming Home for Christmas.
I Found my Heart in Honey Hill.
Reyna slanted a glance at Kade, who was concentrating on his driving. The roads had to be slippery and she didn’t want to distract him. She studied his profile, liking how intent he was on doing his best all the time. No wonder he’d stolen her heart away. He was all the good stuff and being with him made her happier than she’d ever believed she had the right to be.
He stopped in front of the shop she’d sold to Lexi and Gabe, the tires crunching in the snow. Cupcake Heaven had had an extreme make-over, from cute pink pastry shop to slick art gallery. One of Lexi’s paintings was displayed in the front window, a winter scene that conveyed an awe of nature’s majesty in a very few brush strokes. The architectural details of the original Victorian house that Reyna had restored were still maintained, but the palette was more subdued. She knew the house was in good hands. Its holiday decorations were in shades of silver and white, and even the cedar roping looked elegant and urban.
On the right side was the thrift store that Penny had taken over from her mom. It was one of Reyna’s favorite places to shop since Penny had brought in a large inventory of vintage clothing. Penny had a gift for finding unique pieces and also for repairing those garments in need of a touch or two. She was teaching sewing classes in the workroom of the shop and her business was thriving.
“Thanks for the ride!” she said when she stepped out into the snow. “It was a fabulous meal. That might have been the biggest roast turkey I’ve ever seen.”
“I’m glad you could come,” Reyna said, getting out to embrace her former neighbor.
“Of course. It was the best. And I have leftovers!” Penny laughed. “My favorite part of Christmas dinners is the leftover turkey sandwich the next day. Thank you!” She blew Kade a kiss and headed toward her shop, keys jingling.
Reyna could smell woodfires burning and heard a dog barking across the street. It was Doc Maitland’s lab and Reyna could see the dog’s face in the window.
“Nice of you to think of us,” Clem said gruffly, offering his hand. “Merry Christmas, Reyna.” The older man owned the bookstore to the left of the former Cupcake Heaven and lived there alone.
Reyna hugged him, knowing he’d never initiate an embrace but would tolerate one. “Merry Christmas, Clem. I suppose you’re going to spend the evening with a good book.”
“You’d better believe it,” he said with a grin.
“Which will be?”
“Gibbon’s History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire,” he said with satisfaction. He looked like he was itching to get back to it.
“Doesn’t sound very festive.”
“To each his or her own, Reyna. I like an opinionated historian, so Gibbon is a favorite.” He cleared his throat. “The various modes of worship which prevailed in the Roman world were all considered by the people as equally true; by the philosophers as equally false; and by the magistrate as equally useful.” Clem winked at Reyna then waved to Kade. “Good night to both of you, and thank you for the invitation.” He held up the box he carried. Reyna knew there were three cupcakes inside, because she’d packed it for him. “There’s nothing like a sweet with a sip of brandy on a winter night like this. Thank you again, Reyna, and thank you, Kade for the ride.” Kade waved. “Merry Christmas to both of you.”
“Merry Christmas, Clem.” Reyna kissed his cheek, then got back into the van. Kade drove around the corner and parked in the driveway of the house his aunt and uncle had bought and restored for their retirement. The lights were on in the house and Reyna could hear the Christmas music playing.
Kade turned off the engine but didn’t get out of the van. “That was nice today.”
“It was. I liked seeing everyone together.” She noticed that he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to go into the house. Reyna didn’t mind. It had been a hectic few days and she liked having Kade to herself, if only for a moment. His aunt and uncle were kind and hospitable, but she’d be glad to get back to their own place in Portland. She reached out and touched his hand, thinking of how they might celebrate that.
Kade took off his glove and claimed her hand. “It’s been a busy holiday this year.”
“It has.” She waited, guessing he had something to say.
He gave her an intent look. “Everyone married but you.”
“Yes. All the heart tattoos have delivered. Even Chynna looks like she’s found a partner.”
“Does it bother you that Lexi and Liv are married but you’re not?”
Reyna shook her head. “I’ve never been one to follow the crowd.”
“Does that mean you don’t want to get married?”
She smiled, hoping this was leading where she wanted it to go. “It means that there’s a right time for everyone. I’ll be glad to get married at the right time to the right man.”
“How will you know?”
“I’ll know.” She spoke with confidence but noticed his quick frown. “Don’t you think you’ll know?”
“Absolutely. I already do.” He turned his hand over and held on to hers, his gaze fixed upon her. “I just never know what you’re thinking.”
“Don’t actions speak louder than words?”
“Usually. Sometimes, though, it’s good to hear the words.” He was watching her, his eyes dark.
Reyna leaned closer. “Any particular words?”
“Just three. And then four.”
Reyna smiled. “I love you.”
“That’s three,” he murmured, leaning forward to touch his lips to hers. Reyna’s heart leapt right on cue. “I love you,” he whispered against her mouth then kissed her.
“What four?” she asked when he finally lifted his head. The windows were steamed up but she didn’t care. Her heart was skipping and she felt just as flustered as she had the very first time he’d ever kissed her. This man. Oh, he was the one for her.
“Will you marry me?” he asked, his gaze locked with hers. “Or is it too soon?”
“That’s four and five,” she whispered. “I like four better.”
Kade smiled.
Reyna reached up to touch his cheek. “But I only need one. Or maybe two.”
He looked slightly alarmed, which made her smile.
“Yes, please,” she whispered and he grinned before he caught her close and kissed her again.
When they parted, they were both breathless and the windows were completely fogged. “I thought we could choose rings together,” he said.
“I know just the ones,” Reyna said, savoring his surprise. She laughed. “I was going to propose to you at New Year’s.”
Kade chuckled and kissed her again. “Why do I have the feeling that you’ll always be keeping me on my toes?”
“Why do I get the feeling that you don’t mind?”
“Because I don’t,” he said with satisfaction. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Who could have guessed when she’d gone to New York with Liv and Lexi that things would work out so well and so quickly for all of them? Chynna really had summoned some magic for all of them. Reyna was glad there had been a bit of it left for Chynna, too. Seeing her and Trevor together made it easy to guess the resolution of that story, and it pleased Reyna enormously. She smiled at Kade and squeezed his hand and he muttered something about a lack of privacy that made her laugh.
Kade gave her a hot look, then got out of the van, coming around to open her door for her. She stepped out into his arms and a very satisfying kiss, then they looked up at the darkening sky together. The stars were coming out, twinkling far overhead, and she sighed with contentment. She was exactly where she needed to be.
“The winter solstice is the darkest day of the year,” Reyna said, holding tightly to Kade. “From here, every day gets a little bit brighter. I feel like I met you when I was coming out of my own darkness, and the future has just gotten brighter and brighter.” She smiled at him. “There was a time when I would have been afraid to tie my life to anyone else’s, but you helped me move beyond that. I think it’s only fair that we end up together as a result.”
“I like the sound of that,” Kade said and kissed her one last time before they went in to share the news with his aunt and uncle.
It was the best Christmas Chynna had enjoyed in a very long time. In fact, it was the only Christmas she’d enjoyed in years. Since Tristan’s death, she’d been surviving the day—this year, she savored every moment. It was wonderful to be with old friends and new ones, celebrating marriages, enjoying each other’s company and good food, too.
They got back to the lodge and she knew she couldn’t eat one more bite. She went back to her room to change into something more comfortable and considered her roses in her reflection.
It was time for a fresh start, and as always, Chynna wanted to celebrate that in ink.
She got out her tattoo gun and chose red ink. She studied the roses on her left arm, then touched some color into the middle of one petal on her forearm. She put down the gun and rubbed the tattoo, knowing the look she wanted. She’d shade the petal, making it darkest at the center of the flower, plus make the flowers darker as they rose to her shoulders. It was a bit arduous since she could only work with one hand, but she was making progress on that petal when there was a tap at her door.
It was Trevor, but this time, he was dressed in jeans.
He looked just as good dressed down as dressed up. Maybe better, since his T-shirt let her see that fantastic tattoo.
“Unemployed?” she asked with a smile.
“I’m a free man.” His gaze dropped to her left arm. “Are you hurt?”
She glanced down and realized the red might look like blood. “No, it’s ink. I have an idea, but I could use some help.”
“I’m yours to command.”
“Can you wipe when I ask you to?”
“Sure.”
“I just want to do the one flower, to see how I like it.”
“Won’t it look odd to have only one with color?”
“Once I get it right, I’ll let Rox do the rest to match.”
He sat and did as she instructed, watching her work for a while. It was nice to be together, a hum of awareness coupled with an ease with each other’s company. “Is this your memorial tattoo?” he finally asked.
“No,” Chynna said. “That’s next.” She took a deep breath. “I’m going to get Rox to do the back piece that Tristan designed for me. It’ll be a big project. I want it to look like the color is emanating from it and dripping into my roses.”
“So, they’ll be darker at the shoulder and paler at the wrist.”
She nodded, liking that he understood. “And the back piece will be in full color.”
“It’ll be spectacular.”
“I know.”
“And the color gradation is because...” he invited, although she guessed he knew.
“Because Tristan was the sun, the center of my world and the reason I found my way. He lit my path in more ways than one and that influence is a big part of commemorating our partnership.”
Trevor nodded and frowned a little, his gaze dropping to her tattoo. He watched her work for a while, wiping the ink at her gesture, and she had the sense that he was choosing his words.
“You said earlier that you were going to tell me something,” she invited finally.
“It’s not that I want to keep secrets. I just don’t know whether it’s better to tell you or not. I don’t want you to feel pressured or that I’m hiding things.”
Chynna smiled. “Sounds like the best option is to tell me. I’ll try not to feel either.”
He nodded once. “I have a job offer.”
“Wow, that was fast.” She noticed that he didn’t look very excited about it. “Isn’t it a good one?”
“It’s a great one. It’s exactly what I said I wanted.”
Chynna noticed the qualification but didn’t comment on it yet. “Kind of like Wolfe Lodge.”
“A lot like Wolfe Lodge. It’s a hotel with restaurants, a new project with a great location. I can buy in at the ground, be a partner, probably be settled for the duration there. Lots of challenge and opportunity. Good people who I already know and trust.”
“But,” Chynna said, hearing his lack of enthusiasm.
“But.” Trevor took a breath and met her gaze steadily, watching her reaction. “It’s in Hawaii.”
Chynna’s heart stopped. She knew she didn’t hide her surprise but tried to smile. All along she’d been insisting to Trevor that this was just a fling, but now that there was a prospect of him vanishing from her life, and soon, she didn’t want him to go. She felt shaken, but wanted to think about her reaction before she talked about it. “How could Hawaii be a negative?” she asked lightly.
“Well, it’s a long way from New York.” As usual, Trevor wasn’t shy or coy. He put his question right on the table and Chynna liked knowing exactly where she stood. He shook his head. “I know it’s way too early to ask questions about any future we might have so I’m not going to. I also know that just a week ago, I would have been changing my flight reservation right this minute as I drove to the airport.”
“Your flight reservation?”
“Mike asked me to come out and have a look in January, once I was done here,” Trevor explained. “He sent me a ticket for the 10th.”
That seemed so soon. Chynna frowned as she added more color to the petal.
“The thing is I always go,” Trevor said, his voice low. “I’m always footloose and ready to relocate. I just don’t feel in such a hurry this time. I want to know more about you. I mean, we haven’t come close to finishing our agreed twenty questions.” He smiled and so did Chynna. “But at the same time, I don’t want you to feel cornered or on the spot. I just want to keep flowing along, seeing where this leads.”
“Maybe it doesn’t lead anywhere,” Chynna felt compelled to say. “Maybe the magic was just about these past few days, time out of time.” She had a hard time believing that even as she said the words.
“Maybe. A free pass is a powerful thing.”
“Even transformative.”
He nodded. “But don’t you want to know for sure instead of guessing?”
She couldn’t say it out loud, but she did. “People have long distance relationships.” She was surprised in one way that she even suggested the possibility, yet in another way, she wasn’t. It felt right to be with Trevor.
He scoffed. “That’s a compromise and I don’t think it’s a good one.”
“How so?”
“People have long distance relationships because they don’t want to commit to what’s going on. Ultimately, I have to think it dooms everything. At some point, it becomes clear that the two parties are choosing work or family or something over the relationship. And that becomes an issue when one of the two parties wants more.” Chynna put down the tattoo gun and he wiped her skin, the weight of his hand lingering on her arm as he studied her tattoo. “I like to be in or out.”
“Black or white.”
“Committed or leaving all parties free to carry on.”
“No compromises.”
He smiled and shrugged. “I think relationships need more to survive, let alone thrive.”
Chynna had to admit that she agreed with him. She still kept silent.
“And I already want more. For me, going to Hawaii means we’re stepping away from each other for good.”
“All or nothing makes it high stakes.”
“Exactly. Which is why I didn’t mention it right away. I had to think about what was the best plan, but the truth is I don’t know. I just wanted to be honest with you.”
“Thank you.” Chynna kissed him. “I appreciate that.”
“So, lady’s choice. Option one is that we still do the road trip to New York.”
“And make the most of this interval,” Chynna said.
“While option two is that I take you to the train station in Portland, wave goodbye and head to the airport to change my booking to Honolulu.”
He waited, giving her the choice. Since he’d explained what he wanted and she felt as if his departure would mean losing the best opportunity to come her way in a long time, that meant there wasn’t one.
“I think you just became a limited time offer,” Chynna said. “And I think we should make the most of every moment.”
“I knew I liked the way you thought.”
“We’re not nearly done with diminishing the power of shit anniversaries,” Chynna said with resolve as she put down the tattoo gun. “Not only do I want to take that road trip with you, but I think we should spend New Year’s Eve together in New York. Come stay with me and meet my pet raven. I’ll get you through your anniversary, just like you got me through mine.”
She wouldn’t have guessed that she’d make the invitation but it felt right.
She took a breath. “And then we’ll see where we are.”
Trevor laughed and put down the cloth. “You are amazing,” he said with such obvious admiration that Chynna found herself smiling, too. He spared a glance upward. “But you need some mistletoe in this room.”
“You don’t need an excuse to kiss me,” she replied.
“You’re exactly right,” he purred, then kissed her so deeply that she forgot about her tattoo for a long while.
She was too busy savoring the moment.