And I haven’t even talked about the other kids yet.

At UMS, the sixth-grade classes are on the second floor. Seventh grade is on the third floor. And eighth grade is on the fourth floor. In other words, the higher you go, the more dangerous it gets. Because those eighth graders… I can’t even front… they can be a little intimidating—scratch that, they can be straight-up scary sometimes. About half of the boys have full beards, and I’ve seen at least three girls with healthy mustaches. No lie.

Believe me, you do not want to get caught alone on the fourth floor in this place.

Or in the stairwell.

And definitely not in the bathroom. Never in the bathroom. I’ve already decided that if I ever have to go, I’m just going to hold it until high school. Peeing your pants is not a good look, but you know, sometimes in life, especially life at Fort Union, a brotha has to weigh his options. Carefully.

So wish me luck. I think I’m going to need it.