Josef’s smile widened. “Hello, Lena.”
Lena had forgotten her boots, and enough snow had seeped into her shoes to make her shiver. But the block of ice in her heart made her feet feel hot. “I—I do not understand. What are you doing here?”
He extended his hands, which were encased in thick leather gloves. “I am here for you.”
“For me?” Lena blinked in a daze of confusion. “What do you mean? How long have you been in America?”
“Long enough.”
“Why did you not contact me?”
He paused. “I did. Through Hans. I have known every move you’ve made.”
“But you were in Budapest. How did you—”
A trace of irritation unfolded across his face. “You never used to be this slow, Lena. Hans mentioned how tentative you have become. Now I see he was right. ”
Lena scowled.
He paused and took a breath. When he spoke again his tone was conciliatory. “I’m sorry. I know how much you’ve been through. It would make anyone uncertain.”
Lena took a good look at him. Josef seemed older; she thought she spotted a touch of gray at his temples. But he was still tall. And strong. With the Aryan look that had always made her feel part proud, part ashamed. He was watching her with an expectant expression, and she realized she was supposed to say something.
“How—how did you find me? We haven’t been in touch.”
“Oh, Lena,” he spread his hands. “Think. It is quite simple.”
She squinted in concentration. When it came to her, she took a few steps back, and her mouth dropped open. “You! You’ve been directing the operation.”
He dipped his head in acknowledgement.
“But—but…” she sputtered. “… How? Why? You are a Jew.”
He shrugged.
A streak of fury shot up her spine. “You passed, didn’t you?” she hissed. She recalled how they had joked years ago that with his blond hair and green eyes, he could.
He turned up his palms. “I didn’t need to.” He ran a gloved hand along the edge of the picnic table and scooped up a mound of snow. He shaped it into a ball. “Hans has been my eyes and ears.”
She spun around. Hans stood behind her. His chin jutted out as if he was trying not to be embarrassed.
“We had to wait for the right moment to tell you.” Josef smiled again.
“Tell me what, Josef?”
He turned away, tossed the snowball across the park, turned back. “Shortly after I arrived in Budapest, my parents and I were starving. We didn’t have work, we didn’t have money. One day I was approached by two men near the synagogue. They bought me a few meals. I was grateful. It was the first time my belly was full since… well. We started to talk. We all agreed that the Nazis had to be defeated. They remarked that I could pass. With my looks… well, you know.”
She tightened her lips.
“And well, eventually the enemy of my enemy became my friend. Not so very different than you and your Colonel Collins.”
A fresh wave of anger took Lena’s breath away. “Communists!” She gasped. “You are working for the Communists! All this time I have been spying for them, not the Nazis.” She slipped her hands back in her pockets and felt for the gun.
Josef didn’t deny it. “At first I did low level operations in and around Budapest. But when you wrote that you were working in the Physics Department at the University of Chicago… well, everyone became very excited.”
Lena squeezed her eyes shut. She had mentioned her job in a letter. More than once. She remembered describing everyone in the department to him. In retrospect, how could she have been so naïve? She knew the answer. She had been in love. She had wanted to share everything with this man.
“In fact, you were responsible for my rise in the ranks, Lena. Moscow is quite specific about the intelligence they want from their American cells. They want updates on the Met Lab project. The procedures being used for U-235 separation. The method of detonation that will be used. What industrial equipment is used to test these techniques. You have access to all of it.”
The anger roiling her gut curled it into a tight ball. Blood drained from her head.
“So you see, it could not have been more perfect. You fell into my hands.” He looked pleased with himself. “The rest was easy.”
“Easy? You lied to me. You told me I was spying for the Nazis. You forced me to go back to work after Karl—” She cut herself off. “You! You were the one who killed my husband.”
He looked down. It was the first time she thought he might have felt a shred of regret. “Let’s just say I let it happen.”
“You excuse murder by claiming ‘you let it happen?’ What kind of man have you become, Josef? Why did you not ask me? Perhaps I would have…” Her voice trailed off when she noticed Josef rummage in his coat pocket. She gripped the revolver. But when his hand emerged, it was clutching a pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out, lit it with a match, and exhaled a cloud of smoke. When had he picked up that habit?
“Come, Lena. Do not be naïve. You would never have worked for us willingly.”
“But why did you lie about the Nazis? Do you know what guilt—what self-loathing it caused me?”
“We had to protect ourselves. We had no idea you would turn out to be such a valuable asset. If you had been caught, we wanted your superiors to think the Germans were behind it, not us.”
“So you tore apart my soul and ruined my life… for your protection.”
He stiffened. “As you did mine. You left me for another man.” For a moment his composure slipped and his features hardened. This was no longer the Josef she knew.
“For which you took revenge by killing him.” She paused. The pieces were coming together now. “And then you kidnapped Max.”
Josef’s demeanor changed again, and he resumed his civilized manner. “He is quite the young boy. I entertained him myself. Such a bright, curious child. I wish he was my son.”
Lena ignored that. “And then there was Irving.”
Josef blew out smoke. She inhaled the odor of stale tobacco. “He was in your way. He would have been trouble. He became what they call collateral damage.”
“Collateral damage,” she whispered.
He flicked the cigarette into the snow. She watched the orange tip flicker out.
“I am sorry for your pain. I was just following orders.”
She tried to keep the shrillness out of her voice. “And are you following them now?”
He glanced at Hans and Dieter. “Now I make them. That is why I am here. I want to make amends. I know you are boxed in with Collins. It has become dangerous. You cannot go back to work. I want to offer you a way out. Come with me.” He hesitated. “We will go to New York and disappear. I will be a father to Max.”
She flinched. “But you are married. To the girl you told me about.”
He smiled. “A white lie. There is no other. There has never been anyone but you, Lena. I did this for us.” He waved a hand. “Come home to me. Hashem has a way of balancing the scales. We can wipe away the past. Give ourselves a clean slate.”
Lena recoiled at his chutzpah. No, not just chutzpah. Arrogance. Unmitigated arrogance. Was it really this easy for him to come full circle?
Josef smiled, almost as if he knew what she was thinking.
She covered her mouth with her hand. Maybe she had no other choice. He was right. She couldn’t go back to Met Lab. Which meant she would have no way to support herself and Max. But if she went back to Josef, how could she survive? This man might have been her first love, but what she saw in him now frightened and disgusted her. How could he expect the past seven years to evaporate, to disappear into the fog of the past as easily as shadows grow into night? She would live in a constant state of fear, perhaps even terror. No. It was wrong. Everything was wrong.
“You used me. Manipulated me. Killed my husband. Kidnapped my son. Drove me to the edge of insanity.”
“I will make it up to you. I promise.” He ran his hand along the table and scooped up more snow.
She tried to suppress her revulsion. All the misery, the sorrow, and guilt was carved into the marrow of her bones. He couldn’t wipe it away with a scoop of clean snow and sweet words. She wrapped her fingers around the Smith and Wesson in her pocket. “Because you want to balance the scales.”
He nodded. “We are meant to be together. Ever since we promised each other in the Tiergarten. Until death do us part. Do you remember?”
She drew two steps closer. “I do. And I believe you are right. It is time to balance the scales.”
He opened his arms.
“Until death do us part,” she said.
Before she could change her mind, she pulled out the gun and fired. As Josef crumpled to the ground, she spun around and shot Hans. He fell backwards. She whirled around. She knew shooting two and not the third was as bad as shooting none. And Dieter was coming at her, his gun aimed at her chest. She dropped to the ground, hoping to make herself a smaller target. But it was too late. Two more shots rang out.