NINE

OKAY, SO DOING something stupid only took about twelve hours, but it isn’t my fault.

Teagan called. Early. “Dingleberry, what are you doing today?”

“I’ve got some work to do, and then I’m planning my wedding. I think maybe it’s time for us to back off and let the police figure all this out. Or the team that you put together using Adeline’s people can handle it. We shouldn’t be messing around in this stuff, Teagan.”

“A.J. got to you. Fine, I’ll do it myself.”

“What do you mean, A.J. got to me?”

“Jessie had the same conversation with me last night. To leave it alone. Not to step in anything.”

“All A.J. asked of me was that if I’m gonna do anything stupid, which means doing anything with you, that I let him know the plan before I do it.”

“Jessie wasn’t that understanding. He told me to back off. Plain and simple.”

“And yet, here you are calling me.”

“Jessie doesn’t make my professional life decisions. Or any of my decisions for that matter. He’s welcome to give me his opinion, and I will listen and take it into consideration, but he doesn’t rule my life.”

“Why is it that when I wasn’t involving A.J. in my stuff, you got all huffy and said I wasn’t being a real girlfriend? Now, your fiancé asks pretty much the same kind of consideration you expected of me, and it’s all about him trying to control you.”

“Because you aren’t me, and I’m not you, and are you going to do this or not?”

“Depends. What is this?”

“Lola is coming over to talk to the head of human resources. They’re going to tell her that Gord didn’t have the insurance she wants to collect on. He didn’t work for me long enough for it to kick in.”

“Head of human resources? Really? I thought that what’s-her-name just handed out booklets when you guys hired someone, and if anything else came up, it was a meeting over donuts in the break room. I didn’t know you guys got so fancy.”

“We didn’t. The head of human resources is actually a cop that’s coming in to talk to her and maybe figure something out. We moved all the crap out of my old office last night and put a desk and some other stuff in there so that it looks pretty official. We put up a nameplate and everything. Thank God for twenty-four hour stores. I would have bet my retirement that you couldn’t get a nameplate done at three in the morning.”

“When did all this get started?”

“After dinner last night. I went back to the office, and we talked to the security guy. He called a friend of his on the force. It’s a long story, but I think there’s a lot going on that we don’t know about. This could actually turn out more like that ridiculous story you came up with last night than you ever could have imagined.”

“You think the Fishers were really in cahoots with the Gryzbowskis? I can’t see Mr. Fisher and Honey with the likes of Gord and Lola planning some great heist.”

“Cahoots? Heist? Cara, you sound farcical.”

“Farcical? You’re one to talk. Where do you want me, and when? I swear, Teagan, if you get me killed, I’m gonna be mad at you forever.”

“I promise not to get you killed. I’m pretty sure you won’t even get maimed. At least, nothing that will show for the wedding. And I promise, once we get this done, I’ll help you plan your dream wedding. You’re doing it at your own house, right? How hard can it be? We can get it wrapped up in a couple of days.”

“Thanks for wanting to rush through the preparations of one of the most important days of my life. I feel the love.”

“Not the wedding planning, dingleberry. I was talking about getting the problems here at the office wrapped up in a couple of days. Then I promise you will have my undivided attention. We’ll get everybody together, and we’ll plan the wedding of your dreams.”

“Okay. That’s better. Now I won’t have to run you over with my car.”

“Where did that come from? Why would you run me over with your car?”

“I wouldn’t. It would really hurt my feelings if you forced me into doing something like that.”

“You’ve officially lost your mind, Cara.”

“No, you drop kicked it out the window years ago.”

“Okay, I’m on my way to the office. Lola will be there at nine. Probably earlier because she’s really anxious. Don’t be late.”

“I’m never late.” I knocked on the table just because I probably jinxed my never-lateness and knocking on wood can fix that sort of thing. “You never told me what I’m doing.”

“Come business casual. See you at eight forty five.” And she hung up on me.

I filled A.J. in on what I knew, which wasn’t much. Just that there would be a cop there, which made him feel better and worse all at the same time.

The good news is the cop would protect me.

The bad news is there was reason to have a cop there.

There was a time in my life when business casual would have meant jeans and a t-shirt, but I’ve grown.

I pulled on a white long-sleeved blouse and some really cute black dress pants that are almost a cigarette pant, and did my makeup. Before I left the house, I added a black ribbon tie that I’ve had forever, and I don’t think I’ve ever worn. A cute fitted black blazer and really well-constructed black ballet flats — I love being tall, I can get away with flats when others would require heels — and some basic jewelry, and I was good to go.

I got to Teagan’s office half an hour before Lola was expected and was surprised to see her. She wasn’t at the office; she was sitting across the street at the end of the row of taxis parked across from the office building at all times of the day. I’ve never quite figured out why they park there. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone get in one of their cars.

Lola was staring hard.

You would think she’d be staring at the spot where her loving husband was killed, but she wasn’t. She was staring at the front door. Obviously waiting.

I pulled in the parking lot for the bank kitty-corner from my sister’s building and called her.

“Don’t even tell me you aren’t coming.”

“I’m here. At the bank.”

“Why are you at the bank?”

“I just drove past your building, and Lola is sitting at the end of the taxi line, staring at your door. Are you in the building yet?”

“No, they told me to come in about the same time I always do. I’ll be there in about fifteen minutes, which is why I asked you to be there in fifteen minutes.”

“I have visions of her running across the street and confronting you before you can even get in the door.”

“Why would she hurt me if she is trying to get insurance money from me?”

“Maybe the sound of you going kersplat on her windshield is more important to her than money that any moron would know she wasn’t going to get.”

“If she believed that, why did she show up asking questions?”

“So she could be close enough to strangle you?”

“She’s been close enough to strangle me more than once.”

“There have always been people around that would help you. If she kersplats you… ”

“Enough with the kersplats, dingleberry. I’ll go in the back way.”

“Didn’t the cops tell you to do everything the way you normally do?”

“You’re right.”

“I’m not even going to make you say that again. I’m going to sit right here in the parking lot where I can see her. When you park your car, before you get out, call me. I’ll watch your back while you walk in. If she even moves, I’ll do a little kersplatting of my own.”

“You’re being overly dramatic, Cara.”

“Maybe, but if I lost you, I would lose my mind, so just humor me.”

“I’ll call.”

I saw Teagan drive up a few minutes later.

She really needs to wash her car. That worries me. Teagan’s car is always perfect. You can tell a lot about a person by how far out of her normal she is.

She disappeared into the parking lot, and a couple moments later, my phone chirped. Scared the crap out of me even though I fully expected the call. It’s just that Teagan usually takes a minute to get out of the car. Checks her makeup. Grabs her bag and briefcase. That kind of thing.

“I’m here, dingleberry.”

“I see that.”

“Has Lola moved?”

“Nope, still seems to be staring into space.”

“She hasn’t moved at all?”

“Not a muscle.”

“Crap. I hope she’s not sitting there dead.”

“What are the chances?”

“I guess about the same that her husband was over here dead in the parking lot.”

“Okay, you’re freaking me out, Teagan.”

Just as Teagan was reaching for the door handle, either Lola adjusted herself in the seat, or rigor mortis took over.

“She moved. She isn’t making any effort to come kill you — I don’t think — but she moved.”

“Good. Give it a few, and then come on in.”

I arrived at the door at exactly the same time as Lola. It was an accident, but if it ever comes up, I’m taking full credit for genius.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning. You’re Teagan’s sister, right?”

“Yes, ma’am. I work for her part-time on an as-needed basis. Whenever she needs help.”

“No offense, but your sister needs more help than you can give her, and I don’t mean the clerical type.”

“No offense taken. You aren’t the first to say that.” I gave her a smile. I know that was a mean thing to say about Teagan and everything, but I was trying to build a bond with Lola in the time it takes to get to the reception desk.

Lola muttered. “I don’t know if I would work for her. You can end up dead.”

What a strange thing for a new widow to say. She didn’t seem the least upset by the fact that her husband lay bleeding in the parking lot just past the glass doors not all that long ago.

Maybe she is a gypsy because she seemed to read my mind.

“I know I don’t seem all that upset about my Gordie being killed and all, but you have to understand, I leave all that to God. You know, being a preacher and all.”

That seemed like the least wifely and least preachery thing I’d ever heard. I gave her a warm smile and told her that I understood. Which I totally don’t.

Before anything else could be said, Lindsey showed up from around the corner. She greeted me first, which seemed natural. Even if having the boss’s personal assistant show up at the desk before she was asked for was a little heavy-handed. Still, it hardly seemed like they had a whole sting operation going on in the other room. “Cara, I’m glad you could make it. We are upside down with the transition and new business we’ve got going on. Teagan asked if you could just hang out in the conference room until I can get all the needed documents to you. That would be great.”

“No problem. I’m gonna get a cup of tea. Then I’ll head that way.”

I headed toward the little supply cart. Not because I wanted tea. Because I wanted to listen.

Lindsey talked to the receptionist for a minute or two.

I guess it would look bad if they brought Lola straight back. Most boss-type people keep you waiting even if they don’t have anything pressing to do. It’s like making sure that you are always at the head of the table or that your chair is higher so that you look down at the people you are dealing with. Old-school, but it still works. Humans haven’t changed as much as they give themselves credit for.

Lindsey addressed Lola.

“Ms. Gryzbowski, if you would follow me, please?”

What good is it to accidentally on purpose overhear this stuff if they aren’t going to say anything worth hearing?

Teagan hasn’t filled me in on any of it. I’m flying blind.

I was shuffling back to the conference room, trying hard to make the short walk last as long as possible just in case there was something to hear or see, when someone grabbed me and pulled me into an office.

I didn’t scream.

Not because it didn’t scare the royal bejesus out of me, but because I was concentrating on not spilling my tea.

Teagan was standing in front of me. She whispered so quietly I’m not sure if I heard her or read her lips. “You did good. Sorry, I couldn’t figure out how else to get you in here.”

I met her tone and volume. “What’s going on?”

She just pointed. Wedged between a couple of computers that looked like they lived there all the time, I could see a setup — not like the ones they show you on television — that was snooping on what was happening on the other side of the wall. There were cords and wires hanging everywhere and it wasn’t the neat professional appearance we have all become accustomed to when thinking we are watching reality TV.

A really big and extraordinarily handsome guy — I’m guessing a cop — tried to stand, but satisfied himself with the cutest half smile and a wave.

I wonder if he and Suzi would get along.

Lindsey was dropping Lola off. She introduced Lola to Timmy. I whispered “Timmy?” to Teagan. I know she has an employee named Timmy. But Teagan’s Timmy is older, fatter, and is not a human resources kind of guy.

Teagan just shook her head at me and stared at the screen.

“Mrs. Gryzbowski, I’m sorry for your loss. Teagan tells me that you are interested in Gord’s life insurance policy.”

“Yes.” She looked around the room like she knew there was something funny going on. Like she could feel all the eyes on her.

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but there’s no benefit for you. He wasn’t here long enough to have his benefits kick in. I’m sure you know that. The agreement he had with this company was that his benefits, all of them, would come into play at ninety days. He didn’t work here that long.”

“I thought that was just the health care and the savings plan.”

“No, everything happens all at once.” He offered her a sad smile. “I’m sure when you stop and think about it, it will make sense to you. We wouldn’t want our employees to have life insurance but not health insurance.”

The tone of his voice was sad and supportive, even if what he was saying made her sound foolish.

“I think that an exception should be made here.”

“I’m sorry?”

“When my husband signed those papers, he didn’t know he was going to be murdered in the parking lot while he was trying to do his job.”

“Excuse me?”

We all leaned in to hear what she said. The guy that was a couple of feet from her. All of us stuck in the little closet. Nobody was breathing. Maybe this is when she would give herself away.

“I think that an exception should be made because of the situation. My husband was killed working for this company. You owe me something for that.”

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but as far as we know, his death had nothing at all to do with our company. I’m sure if you can come up with a connection, Teagan would be more than happy to entertain anything you have to tell her.”

“Maybe I’ll just do that.”

“Would you like me to go get her? See if she is available?”

“I can do that myself.” Lola moved toward the door.

Teagan flew out of the office without saying a word. The cop grabbed my arm so that I wouldn’t follow.

I’m not saying I would have, but it’s a good thing he stopped me.

He clicked a couple of things on his keyboard, and Teagan’s office came onto his screen.

I all but sat on his lap so that I could get the best view possible.

Lindsey was at the office door by the time Teagan got behind the desk and took a calming breath. “Teagan, Ms. Gryzbowski is here, and she’s insisting on speaking with you.”

“Lindsey, I’m busy. I thought that Timmy was going to take care of it.”

“He tried, but she wants to talk to you.”

Teagan took a deep breath. Before Lindsey could even turn around, Lola burst past her.

“I think we need to have a little talk, Teagan.”

Teagan addressed Lindsey. “Can you give us a few minutes, please? I’m expecting Jude Bonheur any second. Please get him a cup of coffee and tell him I’ll be with him shortly.”

Good move. Teagan wanted Lola to know she’d better talk fast, and a man was expected at her door any minute.

Lola didn’t even bother to sit. “My husband was killed because of you.”

“No, your husband was killed in the parking lot. That has nothing to do with me.”

“He was killed while at work.”

“He wasn’t scheduled to work, and it was well after hours. I’m not sure that his death had anything at all to do with this office. As a matter of fact, I have searched through every scenario I can think of, and in none of them does his death have anything to do with this office. If you have information… ”

“He died not more than three hundred feet from here.”

“I understand that.”

“He died while he was your employee.”

“Actually, his status as an employee was under consideration. As you are aware, he was stepping back from his position while we decided if we would continue our working relationship or end it. Legally, I’m not certain what the status would be. That would be for the lawyers to decide.”

I thought Lola’s head was going to explode. One sure way to make someone lose her composure is to keep your own. I know that, I’m just not very good at implementing it.

“You’re trying to deny your liability?”

“I’m sure we have no liability here, Lola. I’m confident we have no culpability as well.”

I knew from her choice of words that Teagan was starting to get mad. Lola didn’t know that she could be the recipient of a Teagan Twister without warning. That wouldn’t be good. It would all be caught on tape. Police tape. That’s pretty official. When Lola got done suing Teagan, the company would be ruined.

Lola said a few nasty things and ended it with a comment about my mother’s death. Had a normal person said the same stuff, it would have been hurtful and annoying, but the way that Lola said it, I was seeing red and knew that Teagan was seeing black.

Before the cute cop could grab me again, I was out the door and into Teagan’s office.

“Excuse me, Teagan. I thought you were alone. Your appointment is in the lobby. I thought I could just ask one quick question. I’ve been waiting in the conference room forever. If you don’t have anything for me to do, then I guess I’ll just go home.”

The two of them were stunned for a second at the interruption, which caused the intensity of the whole thing to calm just a fraction, which was more than I’d actually hoped for. What I’d hoped for was simply blocking the camera when my sister ripped Lola’s face off.

“I’m sorry, Cara, you’re right. I’ll be right there. Lola, if you have no information that would lead us to how your husband’s murder is connected to this office, I’m afraid there’s nothing further we can discuss.”

Lindsey showed up at that moment. “Is everything alright?”

“Fine. Will you please see Ms. Gryzbowski to the door?” Teagan’s tone made ol’ Lola seem like yesterday’s putrefied garbage.

“We’re not done.” Lola’s threat seemed genuine. Much more so than her supposed sadness over her husband’s death.

“Lola, I’ve tried to help you, I really have, but the truth is unless you can provide me solid evidence that your husband’s death had something to do with this company, we can’t help you. Even if it did have something to do with this company, he still wouldn’t have any benefits owed to you. If it was our fault that your husband died, then morally, I’d feel like I needed to step up, even if I didn’t have to do anything legally. Do you get what I’m saying?”

“I do. I’ll think about it.”

“I really am very sorry for your loss.”

“Yeah, I can see just how you feel.” Lola stomped out.

Teagan took my arm and pulled me toward the cop in the office with all the computer equipment. “Anything?”

“Not really. She seems like she’s crazy, but there’s no law against that.”

“Anything else we can do?”

“Nope.”

“Then I’m taking off with my sister. Family stuff. You need anything, just ask Lindsey.”

“You got it.”

I kept my mouth shut.

I’m proud of that.

I waited until we were in my car before I said a single word.

“Family stuff?”

“I’m family, and this is my stuff. Start the car, dingleberry.”

“Where are we going?”

“We’re going to follow Lola.”

“She’s gone.”

“Yeah. But while we were inside, the real Timmy was putting a tracking device on Lola’s car.”

“A tracking device? Is that legal?”

“Probably not.”

“Don’t get me arrested, Teagan.”

“Keep your mouth shut, and nobody is going to know. It’s just a thing that I found online. It’s more about keeping an eye on your kids than it is some super spy deal, but it will work.”

“Dear God, what has the world come to?”

“Let’s go. I’ve got the app on my phone. We will know where she is all the time.”

“You and your apps.”

“I took most of them off, so don’t start.”

“You? App-less? I find that hard to believe.”

“I downloaded an app the other day, and it had an ad for another app that basically runs your life by consensus. From what you wear to how you do your hair to what you have for breakfast. You put it out there, and people help you make the decision. That was just a little too scary for me. It convinced me I’m headed to a really dangerous place with too many apps, so I got rid of almost all of them.”

“You don’t want to be involved in an app that tells you which shoes to wear, but an app used to follow someone that may or may not be involved in drama that is serious enough to get someone killed, that app is okay?”

“Exactly. She just turned left on Bouncer. Go!”

“Can I just remind you that if you get me killed I’m gonna be really mad?”

“I’m not going to get you killed. Why are you always talking about that these days?”

“Maybe because I thought that Mom would be dancing at my wedding.”

I knew I’d pushed it too far when I saw the look on Teagan’s face. “You’re right. Pull over. We shouldn’t do this.”

“We can look, we just don’t touch. Isn’t that always Mom’s rule?”

“We aren’t five, dingleberry.”

“No, but the same thing applies. Mom said she didn’t care who Daddy looked at, as long as he didn’t touch anybody but her.”

“Speaking of that, I was talking to a woman that works in the building, and her mom passed about two years ago. She said that she and her sister prayed every Sunday that her dad would find someone to date. That happy men live longer, and that it’s a sign that Dad and Mom had a good marriage for him to want to recreate that again with someone else.”

“Really? Well, you can be the one to tell him that, Teagan. He never really liked you anyway.”

“Are we going, or are we sitting here? Because if we’re sitting here, I need to get back to the office and see what the cops came up with.”

“You’re the one that changed the subject. How can you bring up Daddy dating when we are supposed to be chasing a lunatic?” I took a breath. “We’re going. Where?”

“She’s on Belcher.”

“Why did she go Bouncer to Belcher?”

“It’s kind of a natural thing. Bounce then belch.”

“You’re an idiot. I think if we go down Forty-Seventh, then right on Blander, we’ll run right into her.”

“Go. And, dingleberry, for the record, if I got you killed, I’d be sad. For a whole day. Maybe two.”

“Well, that makes it all better.” I stepped on the gas and did a little squeal when I flipped a slightly illegal U-turn. It got the heart rate up, which can only help when you’re in semihot pursuit of a maybe-gypsy who might or might not have the death and destruction of your favorite sister on her brain.

“She stopped.”

“Where?”

“Hold on, let me get a satellite version of the map. I kept it on regular so that it wouldn’t have to work so hard to update. What the hell?”

“What?”

“She’s at the Fishers’ condo.”

“I thought the Fishers’ had a ranch. Gentlemen’s ranch. Whatever the hell that was that I schlepped through the neighbor’s pasture and almost stepped in horse poop to get to.”

“They do, but they also have a condo. It was Honey’s before they got married.”

“Do they rent it out?”

“Nope. They use it when the smell of the ranch is too much for them. A couple times a year, the neighbors are doing farmy stuff, and Honey doesn’t like it.”

“Must be nice to be able to change your locale based on the preferences of your nose. How big is the complex? Maybe she’s seeing someone else there. Coincidence and all that.”

“There’s no such thing as coincidence.”

“Sure there is. We got adopted by the same parents. I know they haven’t told us yet, but it’s the only explanation I can come up with for why you are so Teagan, and I am completely Cara.”

“Mom dropped you on your head a lot. Case closed. Let’s just see if Lola moves.”

“I know you’re trying to be funny, but I read an article the other day that said people who had brain injuries as kids often have memory problems like mine. I think maybe I did have a brain injury and that’s why my memory is so weird.”

“You did get smacked in the head with the swing that time. Hit you so hard in the back that you went forward and knocked out two baby teeth.”

“Yep, and remember when I was waxing the family room floor?”

“You mean when you used furniture polish on the floor, put on Dad’s socks, and slid right into the dining room table?”

“I looked like a unicorn, the bump on my forehead was so big.”

“Dingleberry, nobody in the family is going to argue that you might have brain damage, but for now, could we please stay focused on this?”

“We’re here. You said you don’t want to move. Don’t get all Teagan on me. Are we just gonna sit here and watch? Hope she happens to walk right past us? Or are we going to break all the rules and actually get out of the car and see if we can find Lola?”

“You see her car?”

“No… ” I swiveled my head from one side to the other. Just as I was going to give up, I saw something in my side mirror. I hissed. “Shit!”

Lola walked up on Teagan’s side. “What are you doing here?” She said it loud enough for us to hear through the window, which meant other people could probably hear us, too. That was good. At least they would report that there was a woman yelling before the gunshots.

Teagan rolled her window down a bit. “I’m sorry?”

Lola looked as angry as anyone I’ve ever seen. She had a huge handbag. She could probably hide a really big gun and a short guy that knows how to use it in there.

“I asked what you’re doing here.”

“We drove over to take a look at the clubhouse. What are you doing here?”

The fact that we’d said I was working with Teagan today and she had an appointment waiting in the lobby when Lola left didn’t lend itself to Teagan’s story, but Lola didn’t seem to notice.

“Why do you want to look at the clubhouse?”

“Cara’s getting married. My business partner, Mr. Fisher, owns a condo here. They have told me about fifty times that the clubhouse is absolutely gorgeous. Cara and her fiancé don’t want a traditional wedding, so I thought that maybe we could use the clubhouse. That doesn’t answer why you’re here.”

I swear Teagan is the best liar in the family. She used to really suck at it. Must be she is practicing now that she’s gonna marry a spy and everything.

“It’s none of your damn business why I’m here.”

“Well, that’s hardly fair. You asked me, and I answered.”

“Yeah, well this isn’t a game of show me yours.”

“Ew.” Teagan turned to me. “On second thought, I don’t think this is going to work out.” She turned back toward the window. The look she gave Lola spoke volumes. Most of them indicated that because Lola was in the neighborhood, the neighborhood was not up to our matrimonial standards.

That was my cue. I took off before Lola could say anything else.

“Well, that didn’t work.” I pulled over when we were out of sight. “She caught us.”

“What the hell was she doing at Mr. Fisher’s condo?”

“Maybe they know each other.”

“Then why wouldn’t they say something about it? If it’s all in innocence, why the secrecy?

We both said it at the same time. “People don’t hide what they’re proud of.”

My mother, obviously channeling her wisdom.

“Okay. Dingleberry, why don’t you just drop me at the office, and we’ll call it done.”

“Probably because you’re going to jump in your car and do something stupid, and as your favorite sister, I reserve the right to accompany you on all stupid adventures so that when something goes wrong — and it probably will — I can say I told you so.”

“I’m not sure what to do at this point.”

“Well, you could track down Lola and force her to tell you what’s going on, or you could do the safer thing — physically, not emotionally — and confront your friend and business partner.”

“Mr. Fisher doesn’t have anything to do with a murder.”

“You would have sworn he didn’t have anything to do with tax evasion until the computer guys found evidence on your work computer.”

“Mr. Fisher says that’s all innocent, and with everything else going on, I haven’t followed through. If those computer guys turn me in to the IRS, I’m gonna have a really lousy excuse. The judge is not going to be impressed.”

Teagan began her soliloquy while I drove her back to the office. I could imagine her in front of a judge. “You see, your honor, I meant to contact the IRS, really, but then my business partner, the one you’ve already sentenced to life in debtor’s prison, confused the hell out of me when he was at a hotel full of naked people. My brain was still spinning because of the whole porn thing, and then there was the murder and everything. Really, I’m a good Irish Catholic girl who follows the rules and keeps her nose clean.” There was a pause. “And speaking of that, when was the last time I had a facial? My life is falling apart, Cara.”

“You’re worried about a facial? Really?”

“No, I’m not worried about a facial. I’m worried about what the lack of a facial means. Think about it. Not all that long ago, it was just Jessie and me. We were fun. We had the time to do anything we wanted. We used to sleep the whole weekend sometimes. Well, not sleep… ”

It was the first smile I’d seen on her all day.

“Don’t gross me out, Teagan.”

“You know what I mean. Then all the trouble with Jessie. We almost didn’t make it through that. Then Mom. I’m still not sure I am gonna make it through that. And the baby and her crazy momma. And now all this. Cara, I don’t like chaos. Never have.”

“Then we will just have to make it as orderly as possible. That’s my specialty, remember? Teagan, you mentioned Joynessa twice. That probably means something. You need to remember you’re grown. Your life will probably never be simple again, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be wonderful.”

“I’m not sure I can do this. The business and the baby and all this stuff with the murder and the IRS. Out of all of it, I think the IRS scares me the most.”

“It would me, too. Dealing with the IRS is kind of like dealing with a rumor. Doesn’t matter how many facts you throw at it, there are going to be some people that just never believe you. You gotta pray your auditor isn’t one of them.”

I tried to dig out my best reassuring smile. “We’ll get it all straightened out. Then we’ll get you organized again. Teagan, you’ve run that office for years and years. There’s no reason to believe that you can’t run it and make more money than ever while you do it. When you stop to really think about it, the only difference between before the Fishers left and now is you’re getting paid closer to what you are worth now.”

“I don’t think I ever realized how much Mr. Fisher was doing. It felt like everything was on me, but I’m beginning to think he had a lot of stuff going on I didn’t know about.”

“One thing at a time. First, we go back to the office. Then we make an appointment with Mr. Fisher.”

“An appointment?”

“Do you want to catch him with his pants down? Literally?”

Teagan laughed. It was good to hear. “Mom used to say that. Catch him with his pants down.”

“About Mr. Fisher?”

“No, but still. You’re right. I’ll make an appointment if I can. This afternoon if possible. I’ll let you know what happens.”

“You don’t want me to come?”

“You have a wedding to plan.”

“True, but you could use a witness if something is kinda bad. A little sisterly support if it’s really bad.”

“I can handle it.”

“I know you can. But why would you want to do that alone?”

“I don’t. Thanks.”

“And we can talk about how we’re going to get your life in order once we figure this out.” Why I need to figure Teagan’s life out is a conversation for a different time.

“No. First, we address Gord and the IRS, then we get you married, and then we will worry about my life.”

“Sounds good. You know this is all going to work out, and we’re going to be laughing about it.”

“Back to being an optimist, dingleberry. I like that. And you’re right. It will give me something to talk about at your reception.”

“Well, I would hope you’d have something a little more, you know, personal to talk about.”

“Okay. The fact that you won’t be wearing a thong. All discussions will be centered around that.”

I rolled my eyes so hard they almost got stuck. But she’s right. There will be no thong under my wedding dress. Maybe tap pants.