Aiden didn’t go straight home after the hospital. He went to Lily’s house. He needed to tell her what an idiot he was and beg her to take him back. He stood on her doorstep, ringing the bell over and over, but she didn’t answer. When he started banging on her door and calling her name, her neighbor stuck her head out of her door and scowled at him.
“She’s not home. She left hours ago. Can’t you see her car’s not here?” The older woman gestured toward the parking lot and Aiden realized she was right. He didn’t spot Lily’s van anywhere. He turned to ask the neighbor if she had any idea when Lily would be back, but she had already slammed the door.
He tried calling and texting, but got no response. So, he waited. He sat in his car and waited, debating how to explain to her how stupid he’d been. How to ask her to come back, and give him a chance to be what she needed.
Lily still couldn’t shake the anxiety in her stomach. She’d gotten Aiden’s phone call and text an hour ago. Since she’d seen the news about his reaction to shellfish and trip to the hospital on Facebook, she had finally texted back just to ask if he was okay. He’d said he was and that he needed to talk to her. She hadn’t replied.
Not because she didn’t want to. In fact, she wanted nothing more than to call, text, and see him, whereupon she would likely throw herself into his arms, begging him to take her back, which was why she wasn’t doing any of those things. She wouldn’t do anything that would cause her to end up in his arms again, because if she had to leave those arms behind when he changed his mind down the road, she’d lose it for sure.
The only thing that had kept her from utterly wallowing in a self-misery-and-ice-cream-overdose-induced coma was her work. If she hadn’t needed to get out of the house to make her deliveries and keep her business afloat, she would be on the floor, huddled in the fetal position crying her eyes out for weeks on end. And, her mama hadn’t raised a fool. She wouldn’t put her heart back in the hands of a man who clearly had a huge, enormous, insurmountable aversion to commitment.
So, she’d called Katie for about the dozenth time to wallow in her misery and ask her friend to tell her again that she needed to be strong, and then she’d gotten out of bed and went to work.
When she pulled into the parking lot of her apartment complex and recognized Aiden’s car, her stomach flipped. So much for staying away from him. Lily pasted what she hoped was a neutral, friendly look on her face and stepped out of the car, waiting for Aiden to approach.
Not fair. The man looked like sin dipped in ice cream, all dripping with sex appeal as his eyes met hers.
“Lil,” he breathed out when he stood face-to-face with her, and she had to hold her breath and bite down on the insides of her cheeks not to jump him right there.
“Can we talk?” he asked, when she didn’t say anything.
“I don’t think that’s a great idea, Aiden.” Lily looked down at her feet, then back up at him, struggling to put some mental and emotional distance between them. She had thought if she went into this knowing it was just for fun, she’d come out with her heart intact. She hadn’t expected it to hurt more than breaking up with Craig had. A lot more. She had been completely unprepared for this. And, she wasn’t about to make the same mistake again.
“Please, Lily? Just let me come up for a minute,” he said, reaching for her, stroking her arm with the tips of his fingers. She nearly melted into a puddle in the parking lot, but she steeled herself and sidestepped him. She had a ton of empty containers in her van that needed to go up to her apartment to be sanitized before going with her to the commercial kitchen tomorrow, but those could wait. She needed distance now.
“Lily, I want to try again. I acted like an idiot, but if you give me another chance, I know we can—”
She didn’t let him finish. She couldn’t, because if she let him talk her into getting back together with him, she’d be in with her whole heart and soul this time. And, she’d be wrecked. She just knew it. Losing him twice—and she knew she would lose him because no matter what he said, the truth was, he wasn’t a long-term kind of guy—would just kill her. She needed to convince him to walk away.
“Sorry, Aiden. We had fun and it was great. Don’t get me wrong, but I’ve moved on. I had a really good time with you. I just, I’m done, you know?”
“It was great?” he asked, a confused look on his face. She understood the confusion. What they'd had was a whole heck of a lot better than ‘great.’ Try mind-blowing, earth-shattering, life-altering—those words fit. Great was the understatement of the century.
So, she topped her performance off with, “I’m seeing someone else now. In fact, I have to meet him in a little while, so I have to grab a shower.”
She made a show of checking her watch, then grabbed her keys and hit the lock button on the remote. He stood looking at her, the shock clear on his face.
“Hey, I really am glad you’re all right, though, Aiden. I was so sorry to hear you were in the hospital.”
And with that, she left, moving a lot faster toward her apartment than she’d have liked given the nonchalant, I’m-not-bothered-by-seeing-you-or-tempted-by-you-in-the-least attitude she was trying to exude. But, dammit, she needed out of there, fast. She made it inside, shut the door behind her, and crawled onto her couch, pulling her legs up to her chest. She would let herself have a good long cry and then call Katie to be sure she’d done the right thing.
She prayed she’d just done the right thing because doing it had hurt like hell.