To begin with, I would say that during the worst of your situation I had a mixture of emotions toward you ranging from extreme empathy and sadness to, at times, a sense of disillusionment with your plight, which was due to what I felt had become your somewhat narcissistic attitude.
Consequently, at times, my compassion toward your situation was tested whenever I perceived that you were exhibiting a “woe is me, life has dealt me a bad hand and all of you are responsible” attitude. While I realized that this self-absorption with your own problems is a common and understandable trait among people dealing with deep depression and suicidal feelings, I was still put off by an apparent mind-set that you were the only one dealing with life’s various daily problems. In this regard, I think that no matter how much one loves and cares for another that is in your situation, it is common for their sympathies to be strained when they are, as in my case, struggling to raise a family, deal with a job, pay the bills, and so on.
Unfortunately, it got to a point where I did not enjoy your company, which was tough for me, because in the past I had always felt that we had a lot in common and I missed sharing thoughts and laughter with you. But when I was around you, I always had that “walking on eggshells” feeling, fearing that whatever I said would be the wrong thing. So I just felt it was easier to avoid contact with you altogether. But, of course, then I would feel guilty that I was not staying in contact with you, the old “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” syndrome.
Thankfully, over the past couple of years, I have happily watched you start to enjoy your life, culminating in your highly responsible job, the purchase of your first home, and the publication of this book. I think I can speak for the entire family in saying that we’re all proud of your accomplishments. As for myself, I am thrilled that our relationship as brother and sister has strengthened, and I’m looking forward to sharing thoughts, laughter, and our lives together in the years to come. Congratulations, Sue.
Love, Roberto XO
P.S.: Teedent!
—SUBMITTED BY MY BROTHER BOB, NOVEMBER 2000