JUST NOT RIGHT

Dictionaries have a strong lean to the right. Don’t believe me? Look at DEXTERITY, or skill. Its origin is dexter, Latin for right-hand side. The classical opposite is SINISTER, meaning evil. This is pure Latin for the left.

As a SOUTHPAW (the boxing slang for a leftie), and a GOOFY-FOOTER (the surfie term), I resent the favouritism. How dare ADROIT, meaning capable, arise from à droit, French for ‘according to the right’? Meanwhile GAUCHE means ‘left’ in Lyon, and comes across as clumsy or naïve in English.

The trend gained momentum in the Middle Ages, when the left was linked to the Devil. The Bible boosts the bias, with several Gospels referring to the right hand of God, meaning ultimate power. In Christian eyes, right equals might.

In 77 AD, the Roman poet Pliny used the phrase EARS ARE BURNING to describe that sense of someone talking about you. Yet, in keeping with the lateral prejudice, the Romans believed that if your left ear was blazing, then the talk was malicious. And if it was your right? Well, that could only be praise.

A LEFT-HANDED COMPLIMENT, on the other hand, is when a criticism lies implicit within supposed praise. Just the kind of treachery I’d expect from a RIGHT-HAND MAN, the so-called trusty helper.



9781743431399txt_0015_005 1. No big surprise, but ADROITLY can be rearranged to make another word of eight letters, which suggests a wrongful worship. What is it?

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9781743431399txt_0015_005 2. To get back at all those self-righteous righties, can you detect what unusual quality the following sentence owns?

A TART BEEF STEW TASTES SWEET AFTER A FEW GRATED BEETS ARE ADDED.

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9781743431399txt_0033_005 3. If a left-handed fruit is a SOUTHPAW PAWPAW, or an invisible drum is a PHANTOM TOMTOM, then what contrived phrases satisfy these next four clues:

(a) Papal dance (7,3-3) __________________

(b) Trendy monkey (6,5) ____________________

(c) Portuguese cracker (6,6) _______________

(d) Gluey grain (7,8) ___________________