The buzz of Renegades settled over Selina’s skin. It was the home she’d created for herself. The hibiscus wreaths she’d made hung from the windows, and amid the rich scents of wood and porter, she caught the faint thread of herbs, something she always adored about this place. Coming home felt bittersweet after the transcendent vacation she had, but she found comfort in sinking back into routine as well.
Her skin was still tingling, and her heart was thumping faster than normal, but the sight of her bar drew her in, a tether of real life she sorely needed.
The crowd wasn’t too bustling right now, which worked perfectly for her return home. The after-dinner rush was when things would surge and get chaotic. Her barback Mina would be in by then though, and she hoped the woman’s training hadn’t lapsed in her time away. Heather ran a tidy ship with minimal fires to put out upon return, but Selina’d be spending the next few days holed away with all the paperwork she needed to catch up on.
She couldn’t help how her gaze kept slipping to the door, as if she expected Aubrey Moore to walk through. She both longed for and dreaded the moment.
A gorgeous brunette sat down on an open stool and ordered a gin and tonic, so Selina set about preparing the drink. Even after a week away, the motions were mechanical, a muscle memory she hadn’t lost. Within a minute, she set the fresh drink on the counter in front of the woman.
Selina glanced up.
Aubrey strode in through the front door.
The woman looked stunning like always, her hair pulled into a ponytail and a glow to her sepia skin like she carried the sunshine in with her. She wore a skintight racerback shirt and red shorts that hugged her muscular ass. At once, Selina’s heart forgot to take a cue and picked up speed. The intense time they’d spent kissing and fucking failed in getting the woman out of her system. If anything, it made her want to hop over the bar, wrap her arms around her, and drink in the scent of lemon and sage. Selina just needed to feel that lithe body pressed against hers.
She worked her jaw. Restraint. The thing she needed badly right now. She grabbed a glass, pretending to polish it with a rag if only to give her something to focus on.
Aubrey marched right up to the bar in front of her.
“Hey,” Aubrey said, spreading her palms on the counter. “We need to talk.”
Selina’s internal alarms clanged, but by some miracle she maintained a level face. “In case you didn’t notice, I’m working right now.” Which meant she also couldn’t have a breakdown on the floor in case the talk with Aubrey went south.
Aubrey crossed her arms and took a seat on the stool. “When are you off?” Her gaze sparked with challenge, a look promising trouble. Selina wasn’t sure if she wanted to scream or run the other way.
“I’ve got a break in a half hour when Mina gets here,” Selina offered, which was the best she could do. At least then she could have her breakdown in private once all of this came crashing down.
Aubrey settled onto her stool and offered a brazen grin. “Excellent. Then I’ll wait.”
Selina sucked in a breath, her sanity like the last drips from a keg ready to kick. Just yesterday, they’d been entwined in each other’s arms, reaching the heights of a perfection she’d never experienced. The sex had been out of this world, but beyond that, the closeness, the way she’d come to understand Aubrey, and how they both seemed to melt around each other was brand-new. If Aubrey didn’t give her space, she’d never be able to cleanse herself of all the hopes she’d attached to their time together.
“What can I get you to drink?” Selina asked.
“You should know at this point,” Aubrey shot back, pure sass.
Selina’s hands moved on their own as she grabbed the rum and poured it into the glass she’d been polishing. The coke came next, and then she was handing the drink over to Aubrey, working on automatic. Her heart pounded in her ears, louder and louder and louder.
They’d agreed last night would be it. So why was Aubrey Moore sitting in her bar staring at her with the same sort of swoony looks she’d given while they were on vacation? She shook her head as she set the drink on the bar. Aubrey tried to hand over cash, but Selina turned it down.
“You want to talk, we’ll talk. This is just to tide you over.”
A hand waved at the end of the bar, someone signaling they needed a refill. Selina set to work, striding away from Aubrey. As she poured a refill of the Dogfish Head brew on tap, she couldn’t help but notice the woman in her peripheral. She’d already begun to talk to the brunette she sat beside, animatedly chatting. Selina’s stomach twisted in knots.
She should kick her out now and ban her from Renegades for good before Aubrey took a wrench to her glass heart.
New faces had begun to swing in, the beginnings of the evening crowd showing up, which kept her hands busy. She forced her smiles, words flowing from her lips that she barely paid attention to. Selina just kept on moving from one drink and one customer to the next. Aubrey still sat there chatting with the same girl, and she tried to force down the queasiness in her stomach. This was how her nightmare began as Aubrey went back to hitting on the first chick she ran into, and Selina would have to fight to forget every sweet moment they’d shared.
Her fingers felt as numb as her heart, but she continued to move on autopilot. Gin and whisky poured, beer flowed from the taps, and limes and lemons stung her fingers. She tried to focus on the faces before her, but even when she wasn’t looking at Aubrey, she sensed the woman’s presence on the other side of the bar, driving her insane.
If Aubrey couldn’t give her the space she needed to heal, that ban might be in order. She couldn’t go through nights of this, working through the pain while it paraded in front of her face.
Mina swung behind the bar, her long blonde hair swishing with the movement. She flashed a bright grin. “All set, boss. Ready to continue our training?”
Selina sucked in a breath. Now or never. “It’s time for me to go on my dinner break, and then I’m all yours. The crowd here’s mostly refills right now, and I’ll be right out back if you need me.”
Mina saluted and slid past her to find a comfortable spot to stand. Selina’s throat dried as she looked in Aubrey’s direction. The woman still chatted away with the brunette, and part of her wanted to march on by and ignore the two of them. She could go to grab a bite in the back in peace.
Instead, she found herself stopping in front of Aubrey. She schooled her features before she spoke. “If you want to talk, I’ve got the time now.”
Aubrey glanced at the girl she’d been talking with. “Sorry,” she said, flashing a smile. “I’ve got to go. My future girlfriend’s here.”
Selina’s jaw dropped. Aubrey winked and slid off the stool, heading for the back of the house with a swing to her hips like she owned the place. Selina’s legs moved on automatic as she followed her through the door. Those words resounded over and over again, ballooning inside her with a hope she could barely dare believe in. Once they stepped into the back, Selina swerved past her, heading toward the emergency exit she propped open for smoke breaks. They both stepped through the door.
Selina leaned against the brick wall, needing something solid to hold her upright. The summer air was stagnant and sticky, but she crossed her arms over her chest as she glanced at Aubrey, waiting for her to clarify why she’d shown up tonight. Aubrey paced in front of her, wringing her hands a bit, enough that Selina needed to put her out of her misery.
“How’s your mom doing?” Selina asked, her voice hoarse.
Aubrey glanced up, her gaze softening. “She’s got a diagnosis of diabetes, not cancer, so a lot better than we’d anticipated. But that’s not why I’m here tonight. I wanted to talk about us.”
Selina cocked an eyebrow, unable to offer more. Her heart thundered so loud it was a miracle she could hear anything else.
Aubrey Moore engaging in a conversation about the two of them was the last thing she’d expected.
“I know I have the worst reputation, and it’s been well earned. I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me, and if you want to cling to the agreement we made back in Rehoboth, I get that too.” Aubrey kicked her heel against the brick wall behind her, staring down at the ground as if she couldn’t bear to look up.
“But…,” Selina said, her chest soaring even though she didn’t have any safety measures to break the fall.
“But I want more than a vacation with you,” Aubrey said, her gaze swinging up to snare Selina’s. Those dark eyes percolated with unrestrained emotion. “You’re everything I could want, Selina Beckett. From the secret romantic dwelling beneath all that calm to the steadiness you emanate even when I’m being a pain in the ass—you balance me in every way. And the more I got to know you, the more you awakened all this damned longing that’s just about killing me.”
Aubrey hesitated, but she didn’t look away. “I can’t promise I’ll be any good at this commitment shit—hell, it’s been so long. Shit, I don’t know if you can even trust me after how often you’ve had to deal with me coming into Renegades—”
Selina grabbed her hands, the motion cutting her off. Aubrey glanced up to meet her eyes.
“Are you saying you want something serious?” Selina asked, her lips threatening to curl into a smile.
“I’m saying I want to be with you through everything—birthdays, holidays, adventures, and even the bad shit,” Aubrey said, a tremor in her voice. “I’m saying one week wasn’t enough, Selina Beckett. I want you until the end of time, if we can dare.”
The distance between them was too much, her chest pumping too hard to stand it. Selina closed in, brushing her lips against Aubrey’s. Aubrey wrapped a hand around her nape and kissed her hungrily, as if they hadn’t seen each other in years. Selina sank into this kiss, the one filled with all the promise she’d never dared to dream of. Aubrey tasted like rum, desire, and hope, and Selina lost herself in this woman. Her mouth coaxed out a moan from Aubrey, and she pulled away.
“If we go any further, I’m going to jump you right here in the alley,” Aubrey said, her grip tightening on Selina’s nape.
“It’s my bar,” Selina responded, cocking an eyebrow.
Aubrey grinned, shaking her head. “So, girlfriends?”
Selina snuck in again to nip at her bottom lip, unable to help the giddiness bubbling up inside her. “Yeah. You’re all mine, Aubrey Moore. I play for keeps, and from the moment you opened up to me back at Castaways in Rehoboth, I wanted you. You’re so full of life, this beautiful, reckless hurricane that smashed into my life while I tried to hide away from the world. There was no way I couldn’t fall for you.”
Aubrey shook her head, her eyes crinkling with how big her grin grew. “You’re a once-in-a-lifetime girl, Selina Beckett. I was an idiot for almost passing this up because I was clinging to old fears. If you’re willing to chance this, I’m with you all the way.” Aubrey brushed her thumb along Selina’s lower lip, sending sparks throughout her entire body. The tenderness in her gaze was everything she’d been hoping for.
Selina nodded, her heart thumping so hard she was surprised the cops hadn’t arrived with a noise complaint. “I knew I waited for a reason,” she murmured. “I just didn’t realize it was you.”
A flush rose to Aubrey’s cheeks, and she slipped her hand in Selina’s. “As much as I want to keep making out with you here, Sky, Mia, and Kyle are waiting inside for us. I promised them I’d tell you the truth about how I felt.”
“Then let’s go tell the world,” Selina said, gripping her hand tight as they stepped back in through the door, together.